I went to school later than the average person, Jiang Li always said that my father was reluctant to let me leave home so early, but in fact, the real reason was that I was weak at that time, I was often sick, and my father and mother were very worried about what would happen if I was not by their side.

Before I turned eight, my parents originally planned to hire a tutor to come and teach the class, but after I turned six, Jiang Li also jumped to the sixth grade, and he was preparing for the entrance exam, so he didn't have much time to teach me to read, and he didn't have so much time and energy to accompany me. I didn't like the celebrity bachelors that my father invited me very much, and I often thought that they would teach me to be a stubborn and rotten intellectual like them when they talked at length, so I cried and cried that I wanted to go to school with Jiang Li. My father and mother couldn't resist me, but fortunately I was not so picky and became stronger, so they agreed to let me go to school.

Since Jiang Li had already taught all my preschool and first grade classes at home, I didn't feel the need to waste that time starting in first grade, so I jumped straight to second grade, in the same class as a child who was almost two years older than me. Mr. Ann was in that class at the time, but we really started to cross paths after the end of the first semester of the second year.

Memories ran a little far, I stretched comfortably, the wind outside the house was blowing a little hard, and before I knew it, it was late at night.

I closed the notebook and looked back at Mr. An, who was already asleep behind me.

Whenever my memory is opened, back to more than 20 years ago, I always feel that now is the year of Tongya Bend, and we haven't grown up yet, just had a dream about growing up, and the little An in the dream has become a perfect Mr. An and my husband.

Mr. Ann only arrived in City B this evening, and according to our previous plan, I attended the last exchange meeting on the 8th, just as he finished his last project in Oregon this year, and we went to pick up my mother and go back to Vancouver for the New Year. But Mr. Ann was four days ahead of what we had planned.

Mr. An hadn't slept for a day and a night, and was very tired when he got home, and by the time I packed his luggage, he was already asleep.

He has a habit the same as before, he likes to lie on the bed when he is tired, and he doesn't even bother to change his slippers, and I have to work hard to make him sleep more comfortably.

I kissed Mr. Ann on the forehead and planned to sneak to another room to sleep, but as soon as he got up, he woke up, but his eyes had not yet opened, and he put his arms under his head and turned over with difficulty.

I leaned into his ear and asked, "Did I wake you up?"

"I woke up before you kissed me." His eyes were still closed.

"You're writing that late again."

I said, "I won't kiss you anymore, I'll move to another room and write." ”

Mr. An was finally willing to open his eyes, "I didn't make any noise, I didn't make noise before." ”

I have a bad habit when I write, I sleep during the day, and I don't get inspired until the evening, every time Mr. An orders me to go to bed early, and after sleeping for less than two hours, I will wake up again. Later, Mr. An was also very accustomed to it, and when he came back at three or four o'clock in the morning, he was always asleep. He never knew it when I kissed him, and on two occasions he woke him up, and he rolled over and went back to sleep. I didn't wake up the next day, and while he was washing in the mirror, he shouted in a loud voice: He Xi, did you sneak to another room last night?

"I used to kiss you like this, you don't even know."

"I know, it's not that I don't feel it."

"Then why did you wake up this time?"

"Oh, I just remember that I didn't say goodnight to you today."

When Mr. Ann and I first got married, it was the busiest time at work, he often traveled all over the United States, a business trip was not a few months or half a year, I was in Vancouver, but he also flew all over the world. Sometimes, Mr. An deliberately took time off to return to Canada to reunite with me, and I flew to other places because of temporary work and did not see each other. At the end of the year, we don't spend more than two months together.

The separation of the two places does not produce beauty because of the distance as imagined, on the contrary, the distance in the straight line directly leads to a sense of psychological loneliness and physical exhaustion.

Mr. Ann and I feel this way. During that time, although they were already together, life always felt a little more lonely than before, and more worried than when they didn't meet. We don't quarrel or quarrel. The mutual understanding of adults may lie in the mature way of dealing with problems and the fit and communication of the heart, but often we call each other every day, usually for less than a few minutes, and finally fall asleep listening to each other's breathing.

So Mr. An and I made a three-chapter agreement, cooking together when we were not working at home, writing a letter to each other every other week, and saying goodnight to each other every day.

I was loose and had not had a strong sense of discipline since I was in school, and Mr. Ann was more conscious than I was, and he took these three things as a guideline, and he thought that they were essential things to stabilize our marital relationship in the early days of our separated marriage.

His temperament has hardly changed since he was a child, his personality is more genuine, his principles are strong, and he keeps his promises, and he never breaks his promises.

I was seventeen when we parted, he was nineteen, and I went to England to study. Like me, he applied to a school in the UK, but he dropped out of school halfway through and stayed in China to take care of his aunt, who was not in good health at the time.

I had promised him to write to him as soon as he arrived in the UK, but as soon as I arrived, I changed several places of residence, and I temporarily changed language schools to apply for another school's bachelor's and master's programs, and it was not until more than a month later that I wrote my first letter and sent it back to China.

At that time, the temperature in Oxford was close to freezing, and there was a blizzard in City B a few days earlier. I miss Mr. An very much, I don't know if his aunt's health is improving, whether he is already studying in China, whether he is satisfied with the school, and whether he likes his major. After writing it at night, it was three pages long, and the next day I thought about it, and sent it back along with the gift I had bought for him here.

He replied quickly, but briefly, in response to the questions I asked. I think he must be angry, and the beginning is: You are very good, I look forward to it, I think about it day and night, and you come to the book.

After that, he wrote to him, and he never replied.

The thought of the possibility of cutting off contact with him like this made me feel so uncomfortable that I wanted to fly back to China immediately. However, when I learned from the postman that the letter was signed for every time, I gradually relaxed. Thinking of his temperament, maybe he is still angry, and he will reply next month when the anger is gone, not to mention that we still have mutual friends in contact, how can people not disappear for no reason. But who would have thought that this parting would be seven years long.

I used to blame Mr. Ann too, but then he told me that I realized that his aunt's health had reached that point at that time. In the first year of our separation, my aunt's stomach cancer had been transferred to the second stage, and the general medication was no longer effective. Fortunately, the end result was good, otherwise I dare not imagine how much of a blow my aunt would have had if something happened to him.

His aunt, Ms. An, is a career woman who has been fighting for a breath all her life, cold and eccentric, and has never married or had children in her life. After her grandmother passed away, she was raised by Mr. An. According to Mr. An, the relationship between my aunt and my grandmother is not good, and my aunt has been competitive all her life and refuses marriage and family, which is largely influenced by her grandmother's patriarchal thinking from childhood to adulthood. After her aunt became an adult and became independent, she completely cut off contact with her family, and when her grandmother was alive, Mr. An did not see his aunt until she was seriously ill and died.

Every time Mr. An recalls this, he often sighs that he was like a ghost without a soul at that time, on the one hand, he had not had time to digest the great pain caused by his grandmother's death, and on the other hand, he had no time to feel the joy of having relatives by his side in this world. Between this gain and loss, I can't say what it feels like, I just feel regretful.

And I thought of my aunt and grandmother's decision to "not see each other as well as Huangquan", which is called family, but it is not clear whether the family has done this.

may be too influenced by the original family, my aunt has been strong in front of outsiders all her life, and she looks invincible and aggressive, but she often has low self-esteem in her bones and can't find a fulcrum. She loves and hates Mr. An. In her aunt's eyes, her mother always felt that her son was more important than her daughter, and her grandson was more important than her daughter.

Mr. An has been afraid of her since she was a child, and her aunt is usually quiet and serious. She is strict with Mr. An, whether it is in study, or in life and habits. She also manages the expenditure of every money, and the planning of where the money is spent is like Mr. An's solving math problems, the ins and outs must be clear, and the process must be reasonable.

Our family is different, my father and mother never care about my money, they give me the pocket money they give me, and I have the final say on how to spend it. Sometimes if I'm willing to put it together, a few months of savings can be a lot of money. In this way, I was much richer than Mr. An when I was a child, and I was free to spend money.

The primary school and junior high school are close to home, and we don't board, so Mr. An's family has an unwritten rule that he must go home for breakfast and dinner, so Mr. An is ordered to go home as soon as possible after school. It's a pity that Mr. An was with me at that time, and Jing Yao and I were in our group, so it was inevitable to eat and drink nonsense. After school, take two buses to the farmers' market to eat the freshest seafood, go to the east of the city to eat the most authentic pancakes and fruits, Zhang Ji tofu, and go to the "Qu Mama Ribs Shop" for tooth sacrifice in three days. Mr. An is not a verbal faction, he is a man of action, and at first he promised that he would never move his chopsticks, but later he couldn't stand the temptation of food. After eating, I have to accompany my aunt to eat again.

Secretly called me at night to write homework, He Xi, I'm about to vomit, I won't be with you next time.

I said, "Can't you stop eating?"

Mr. An said, no, my aunt will be unhappy.

Whenever there were five minutes left in the last class, Mr. An would lean his back against my desk again, and I knew what he was going to ask without him talking. For a while, he always asked me if I would go home directly after school, and if not, Mr. An would silently carry his schoolbag and go back by himself.

At first, I was quite pitiful for Mr. An, but I was annoyed that he always called me when he was tired of eating, so I didn't force him to stay. Later, I learned that he had eaten very little at home during that time, and my aunt thought that he was not feeling well and wanted to take him to the hospital for examination, but Mr. An didn't want to expose it, so he deliberately didn't want to be with us.

I think my aunt must know about these things, otherwise she wouldn't like me at all, and she must think that I had brought Mr. An badly. But then Mr. An told me that my aunt didn't like me very much at that time because she didn't like my father, and they had a business holiday before.

My parents divorced, and Mr. An also told her about it, and my aunt directly scolded my father for being a hypocrite. Mr. An said that this was the first time he had heard his aunt speak ill of a person in front of him. And I didn't expect that my aunt and I united for the first time because of this incident. But she didn't like me, and I knew there were other reasons besides my father's.