Book 2: Moonlight at that time
Book 2: Moonlight at that time
Who is in trouble? Who has sorrow? Who has a fight? Who has lamentation? Who was injured for no reason? Who's red-eyed?
Drove 200 kilometers, through the county seat, came to a vacant land, surrounded by scattered factories, and in the distance there were various machinery in operation, everyone got out of the car to check, Mr. Sang took the drawings and pointed and said, Chen Qing had already gotten off the car to greet him.
Now it is the site selection plan, Wenzi came this time mainly to understand the situation and answer questions about the equipment budget, so he did not get out of the car, he did not turn off the engine, and the warm air in the car was warm.
The carriage was unusually quiet, except for the sound of two people's breathing.
The person in the back seat seemed to wake up and moved.
Liu Mianmian slept very sweetly this night, she was easier to fall asleep in a noisy environment, last night lived in this quiet small county, the night was terrible, I don't know if I drank too much tea or thought too much about my brain, last night she tossed and turned, and finally had to lean on the bedside to brush her mobile phone, and finally was dazed, as if she was awake, and she didn't sleep well all night.
Liu Mianmian sat up, straightened her hair, and saw that only she and Wenziqi were left in the car, so she wanted to pull the car door and go out.
"It's windy outside, so if you just wake up and don't want to catch a cold, stay in the car!" Wenzi's voice sounded.
Liu Mianmian thought about it, his words made sense, go out to eat and drink, in case you catch a cold and drag down Sister Yang, it's better to be careful.
But I didn't know what to say to Wen Ziqi, so I simply took out my mobile phone and turned on the news.
Wen Ziqi hesitated for a while, but finally didn't speak again, opened the car door and stood outside the car to light a cigarette, silently looking into the distance.
Liu Mianmian put down her mobile phone, as if she was a thief looking at Wenzi through the glass, her smoking gestures were more sophisticated, her smoking age was not short, and the handsome teenager in her memory was fatter, and her brows were tightly knit at the moment, as if she was a little annoyed, and she smoked a cigarette one by one.
Liu Mianmian remembered that she had walked on campus countless times, and with a crisp knock on her palate behind her, she turned around, and Wen Ziqi looked at her with a smile. It was a signal between them, and every time she heard it, she wondered that she could always turn around like a demon, and that it must be Ziqi behind her, and she ran towards him with a smile.
At that time, Liu Mianmian was naughty and willful, with her hands in the pockets of Wenzi's coat, and Wenziqi was like Doraemon, always preparing all kinds of gadgets she liked, a small doll, or a string of bracelets, and even a note that boasted of being a clever plan, all of which were worthless or even costly, but she happily found the baby, taking advantage of no one, the chick pecked him on the cheek.
Liu Mianmian patted his head, how did he do it, old things, thinking about it, it's a bit messy today.
I felt a little thirsty, but she forgot to bring a water cup, got up and looked at the trunk, sure enough, there was half a bundle of mineral water, pulled out a bottle, unscrewed it and just took a sip, the heart was broken, too cold and too exciting, the stomach itself was like a stone stuffed these days, a sip of cold water went down, sure enough, a few minutes later the stomach began to cramp, it must be gastroenteritis. Liu Mianmian rubbed her stomach hard, blaming herself for being really careless. There is no shop in front of the village or behind it, except for the wasteland is the snow-capped mountains in the distance, and there is not even a passing car on the wide road except for their party. What can I do? I blamed myself in my heart, I really ran to make trouble, hey!
Liu Mianmian tried to calm down, rubbed her hot palms and rubbed her stomach and stomach over and over again, colic pain hit, only to feel qi deficiency, involuntarily arched up, and gritted her teeth.
Wen Ziqi threw away the cigarette butt, patted his clothes, opened the car door, and saw Liu Mianmian, who was pale in the back seat, and saw beads of sweat the size of beans rolling down her forehead.
Wen Ziqi hurriedly went around to the back row, opened the car door, and was about to reach out to touch Liu Mianmian's forehead, when he suddenly thought of something and quickly took it back, his eyes were worried, and he asked anxiously: "Is it a fever or something uncomfortable?" β
Liu Mianmian endured the pain and said cautiously: "It's okay, maybe gastroenteritis, just take it slowly!" β
Wen Ziqi took a deep look at her, closed the car door and immediately ran towards the group of people in front of him, I don't know what he said, everyone looked this way, he hurriedly ran back, sat back in the driver's seat, started the car, and told Liu Mianmian to sit down.
The colic hit, and Liu Mianmian couldn't ask anything, curled up in his seat. The car was racing all the way, and half an hour later, when he came to the door of a small clinic that looked like a town, Wen Ziqi took the lead in running into the clinic, took a cup of hot water and handed it to Liu Mianmian and said: "Drink a cup of hot water first, and then rub your face and hair before coming out!" She did so meekly, stepped out of the car, and sure enough, the cold wind was cold, shrunk her neck, and walked quickly into the clinic.
The doctor was an old man of the Han nationality who was about sixty years old, asked about the situation, auscultated, pressed Liu Mianmian's stomach, looked up and said to Wen Ziqi: "Let's take a drip, acute gastroenteritis, thick tongue coating, gastrointestinal digestive discomfort, stomach and cold again!" Wen Ziqi nodded and said yes, while taking the empty cup in Liu Mianmian's hand, and pouring a cup of hot water for her, Liu Mianmian whispered thanks, and drank it slowly after a small sip, and her stomach was really soothed.
After the skin test, Liu Mianmian sat on the chair in the clinic without saying a word and took a drip.
Wen Ziqi sat opposite her, his head tilted to one side, ignoring her and ignoring her, as if he was a little angry.
Liu Mianmian cautiously, tentatively and sincerely: "Ziqi, thank you!" β
Wen Ziqi was stunned for a moment, looked at her, straightened up, hugged his arms and frowned: "If I remember correctly, Miss Liu, you are almost thirty years old, you have already been a ** or a mother, and this is how you take care of yourself when you go out?" β
Hearing this, Liu Mianmian looked at Wen Ziqi, a trace of grievance flashed in his eyes, and he quickly turned his eyes, lowered his head and muttered, "I'm sorry." β
I'm sorry? Wen Ziqi looked at her wanderingly, I don't know whether to be ashamed or sorry at the moment, Liu Mianmian blushed, sat there quietly, like a careful porcelain doll, her eyes looked extremely tired, the eye area was slightly blue, her lips were almost bloodless, her hair was a little scattered, and her other hand was cramped on the chair.
"Then take care of yourself, it's best not to cause me trouble!" Wenzi was inexplicably annoyed by her appearance.
The previous Liu Mianmian glared at him and gritted his teeth and shouted to him: Wen! Child! Time limit!
Now Liu Mianmian is careful to say sorry to him!
Scold!
Wenzi period, Wenzi period, what do you want? The person in front of him was already a husband in front of him.
Thinking of this, he suddenly became irritable, felt that there was nowhere to hide, got up and walked out of the clinic, returned to the car, turned on the radio in distraught, and the song sounded:
"Allow me to settle down and bury the past with silence,
I came from the sea full of wind and rain, so I lived in seclusion in this desert.
The things that should be concealed are always clear, and a thousand words can only be speechless~~~"
The singing voice is leisurely, telling the past of the front edge, and blaming that person~~
Sadness, depression, unwillingness, and reluctance permeate the entire mind and body during the Wenzi period.
He lay on the steering wheel, and after a long time, a tear slipped down, two drops, then choked, and then began to cry silently.
Liu Mianmian, Liu Mianmian, how many days and nights for you, how many times for you to sink negatively, five years, the more I want to forget your memory, the clearer it is, you are really a poison, really a knife inserted into my heart, I have sewn up the wound with blood, why do you want to appear again?
Thoughts began to flood, as if returning to the time of youth.
At the end of the class that day, Wen Ziqi was bowing his head to collect his notes, a smiling face poked over, his hands pressed against his book, and the smiling face was accompanied by a crisp and pleasant voice:
"Classmate, can you borrow me to copy the notes?"
At that time, Liu Mianmian, who was still a little baby fat, had eyes as bright as stars, and winked at him mischievously, and a sweet fragrance followed.
Wen Ziqi looked at her and said astringently: "Okay! β
"Thank you!" The silver-bell-like girl unceremoniously took away the notes, quickly opened them, browsed quickly, saw the handwriting on the page, and turned her head happily: "Wenzi period, I'll return you after copying!" My name is Liu Mianmian! β
Wenzi's heart is also rejoicing, like spring, flowers bloom and bloom. So much so that when his roommate Zhang Yuan patted him on the shoulder and motioned to go back to the dormitory, he lowered his head and tasted carefully: "Liu Mianmian!" β
"There are few willows blowing on the branches, and there is no grass at the end of the world!" Zhang Yuan put his arms around his shoulders, "I don't know which girl has entered the grass eye of our economics department?" β
For a while, Han Xiangyun skillfully borrowed the notes of the Wenzi period, and various ambiguous versions of adding oil and vinegar spread in the dormitory, and Zhang Yuan, Su Rui, and Xiao Minqiang in the same bedroom laughed and teased while playing cards.
So much so that when they met Liu Mianmian again on campus later, before Wenzi could speak, the other three were always highly enthusiastic and dog-legged, busy calling sister-in-law. She wasn't angry, she smiled lightly, and she got acquainted with them after coming and going.
Since then, there seems to be an extra color in life, and the huge campus can always meet Liu Mianmian, and every time she smiles and says: "Wenzi period, what a coincidence!" β
Soaking in the library on the weekend, Liu Mianmian, who had a thief's head and rat brain, slipped to his side, and said in a low voice like a spy: "Zi period, there are sweet and sour fish pieces and braised pork ribs in the third canteen at noon, and there are braised chicken legs and konjac roast duck in the first canteen today!" β
Wen Ziqi raised his head and looked at her.
"Where are we going to eat?" Liu Mianmian still whispered.
The crystal clear little face, the innocent and bright pair of eyes were looking at him expectantly, so Wen Ziqi couldn't help but scratch Liu Mianmian's small nose, and said with a smile: "The fish is not delicious when it is cold, let's go!" β
The first session in the morning was an economic law class, because of the whim of getting up early, carving a stone delayed time, Wen Ziqi didn't care about eating breakfast and walked to the economics department building with a book, passing through the bustling business district of the campus, and a familiar voice came from behind him: "Ziji!" β
Liu Mianmian is always so happy, she can trot and never walk, holding two sandwiches in one hand, a cup of milk tea in the other, carrying a coffee-colored backpack, stretching out her two arms like a soft and glutinous duckling to run towards him.
"I knew you were going to pass by here, so eat!" Liu Mianmian handed Wen Ziqi a sandwich wrapped in oiled paper, "If you don't eat breakfast, you will become stupid!" She said seriously.
Wenziqi took it, peeled off the oiled paper and took a bite, salad dressing and bread overflowed his mouth, Wenziqi has always disliked soft and sweet food, let alone salad dressings that were too greasy and sweet for him. But looking at Liu Mianmian's expectant expression, he finished eating unconsciously.
Liu Mianmian was really happy, handed over the milk tea, and motioned for him to take a sip.
Wenziqi's throat tightened, frowned, and his stomach was full of sweetness early in the morning, and he really didn't want to swallow another mouthful of sweet milk tea.
Liu Mianmian hurriedly explained: "I didn't drink, it's clean." β
Wen Ziqi smiled, bent down, leaned in front of her, and took a quick inhale with a straw in his mouth.
Liu Mianmian looked at Wen Ziqi happily, took out a tissue and hesitated, and boldly wiped the corners of his mouth for him.
On a sunny summer morning, she wore a neat ponytail, white short sleeves, black sweatpants, white sneakers, beads of sweat on the tip of her nose, and her clean and pure smile touched Wenziqi's heart more than the gorgeous crape myrtle flowers on the side of the road.
That laugh later appeared in Wenzi's dreams countless times, greedy and wanted to kiss it. Fatal laughter, so that Liu Mianmian's practice and abandonment of him in the last days can be indifferent with time. There is no hate, no resentment, only endless lovesickness.
Alone on a drip, he forgot to bring his mobile phone when he got out of the car, Liu Mianmian was bored, so he could only lean on the chair again and pretend to sleep. She is always sleepy, anytime, anywhere, probably because she is light and carefree in her dreams. Just like when she was young, she could be willful, and she could question Wenzi with confidence, when his arms were exclusive to her.
It was a sophomore, she was disturbed by a burst of laughter in Chinese studies class, opened her eyes Mu Muran wiped her saliva, looked around, there seemed to be a pair of eyes looking at her in the front row, Liu Mianmian looked over, looked at each other, the boy immediately turned around and sat upright, he was wearing a light blue round-neck sweatshirt T-shirt, fluffy short hair, and a side face. Liu Mianmian couldn't help but become a nymphomaniac.
When she returned to the dormitory at night, Zhao Xiaochan, who was on the top bunk, poked her head down: "Why don't you make trouble today?" Not sick, right? Liu Mianmian looked at her, the corners of her mouth were grinning, and she climbed onto the bed with lightning speed and got into Zhao Xiaochan's quilt.
"I don't like you! Willow Mianmian! Zhao Xiaochan was shocked.
After listening to her, Zhao Xiaochan smiled meaningfully: "Hey, what should I do, the little girl is in love!" β
"I don't even know his name~" Liu Mianmian said in frustration.
"Silly, huh? You, you, a love IQ gets lower every minute. High school students know that books convey affection, notes and hearts, borrowing and returning, and it is not something in your pocket to come and go! Zhao Xiaochan was furious.
Liu Mianmian suddenly realized that a certain trick in the depths of her soul was finally opened.
Got the notes of the Wenzi period, half lying on the bed, holding it in the palm of his hand like a treasure, the Wenzi period, the sub-period. Flipping through the notes, his words are as vigorous as a young man, and the shape follows the small letters, but they are self-contained.
Liu Mianmian couldn't help but lift the pen and write Liu Mianmian under the three words of Wenzi period. Smirking, I felt that this would be closer to Wenziqi.
Since then, Liu Mianmian has been busy, in addition to studying, she has to think about how to create various intersections and encounters with Wenzi Period every day, and she has to pull Zhao Xiaochan to make an appointment with Zhang Yuan, Su Rui, and Xiao Minqiang to rub the hot pot and inquire about the relevant matters of Wenzi Period. Among them, Zhang Yuan is the gosipy, and he has two glasses of beer: "Sister-in-law, what are you doing this week, our boss is usually the most hypocritical, seize the opportunity to hug him and kiss him fiercely, and the custodian is your person!" β
Liu Mianmian took a sip of beer and squirted it towards Zhang Yuan, and Su Rui cast a sympathetic expression.
Xiao Minqiang handed over a tissue to Zhang Yuan, and said with a smile: "It's too violent, the boss will walk around her." β
Su Rui thought for a while and said: "Good men are afraid of women, preconceived, as far as I know, there are many girls who like the boss, but there are few who really chase them." β
So Liu Mianmian went to the classroom to find Wenzi Period, the library followed Wen Zi Period, and the male dormitory downstairs shouted at the window Wen Zi Period, but Wen Zi Period never refused, but he never trespassed, accepting everything Liu Mianmian gave, but never gave Liu Mianmian any response.
"Isn't this a proper scumbag!" Zhao Xiaochan said indignantly.
Liu Mianmian lowered his eyes.
In the intense preparation of the school's annual cultural festival and art evening, Liu Mianmian, as an active member of the school's art troupe, has a big deal and rehearses seriously, but he has not bothered with the Wenzi period for nearly a week.
After class that day, Liu Mianmian hurriedly ran towards the building of the Department of Economics, looking around in the corridor. When everyone is about to finish the stall, she regrets whether she is late, maybe Wenzi left early.
was lost, a figure flashed out at the corner of the corridor, one meter eight tall, slender and even, bright yellow short sleeves, white pants, still lined him lazy and casual, a little more kind and gentle. is holding a few books and walking towards Liu Mianmian.
Wenzi belongs to the whiter complexion among boys, his eyes are very similar to Nicolas Cage, a little melancholy and lazy, the bridge of his nose is also high, but his lips are cold, and he always gives Liu Mianmian a helpless smile.
"I haven't been looking for you for a few days, and you're dressed so charmingly!" Liu Mianmian said dissatisfied. But he still jumped over happily: "Sub-period!" β
didn't wait for him to respond, and couldn't wait to say: "Do you want to go to see the cultural festival party at seven o'clock tomorrow night?" β
"What's wrong?" Wen Ziqi looked at her, the girl was still wearing a ponytail, but there were a few strands of hair on the top of her head, presumably she was napping again during recess, and she just wanted to reach out and stroke her, but Liu Mianmian anxiously stepped forward: "You must come to watch, I have participated in the show, and the sixth is my performance!" β
"What are you playing?" Wen Ziqi asked with a smile, he didn't come to him for a whole week, it turned out that he was busy preparing for the performance.
"Heavenly Immortal Match!" Liu Mianmian was embarrassed to tug her earlobe, "I sing Dong Yong~, you must come and see it!" I'll go first! After speaking, he turned his head and ran away as if he was afraid that Wenzi would regret it.
At that time, the campus was popular for stage gifts, the audience liked the performers on the stage or were in a relationship, you could send flowers or plush toys after the performance, and the audience would be coaxed, and the cultural festival was not a very serious or themed theatrical evening, and the school leaders did not participate in it and did not interfere, a group of young men and women of the age in the ivory tower sang wantonly, and the atmosphere of the party was quite good.
In the back of the stage, Liu Mianmian put on makeup, wore a blue robe, pulled her hair up to the top of her head, and two blue cloth strips hung down on the back of her head, thinking to herself in the mirror, such a handsome Dong Yong will definitely be able to fall into the arms of the Seven Fairies, live in the cold kiln and give him a few fat dolls, haha.
The audience was pressed, he must be under the stage, Liu Mianmian gasped, hugged his partner's *** with the beat, and pointed to the green water and green mountains in the distance and opened his voice: "... You and I are like mandarin ducks, flying in the world with wings~"
On the occasion of the curtain call, two people successively presented flowers to her partner on stage, the atmosphere reached **, Liu Mianmian looked around the stage, but she didn't see the Wenzi period, she couldn't help but be discouraged, how did she turn her head and get off the stage, a boy with glasses ran up to the stage and stuffed her with a brown bear that was half a person tall, Liu Mianmian looked up in surprise, and hurriedly thanked him, the boy helped his glasses, and said My name is Zhou Dong, and we have a group of tea art classes.
Rao is she has always been very aggressive, but at this time she also stammered, was confused by the sudden situation, and was still resentful and angry with the other person, thanked her sincerely again, and fled the stage with the big bear in her arms.
After changing her clothes, she didn't have time to remove her makeup, so she ran downstairs to the Wenzi dormitory angrily, and was about to open her throat to shout, Zhang Yuan came out of the door, saw Liu Mianmian's face, and smiled exaggeratedly: "Sister-in-law, are you celebrating Halloween?" β
"You call me Wenzi to come out!" Liu Mianmian huffed and ignored his jokes.
"He's not here, sister-in-law, are you going to look for it in the study room?" Zhang Yuan heard that something was wrong, and hurriedly slipped away.
Liu Mianmian listened and went straight to the study room, each window poked in, but there was no figure, so she had to give up, deflated like a ball, drooping her head, the wide and high steps outside the building, there was no one around, she walked down step by step in frustration, and bumped into a wide bosom head-on.
Through the faint light and the bright moonlight from the upstairs window, she looked up at the person she had bumped into. The man, who stood three steps below her, looked at her too, his eyes at her level.
Liu Mianmian's eyebrows are still painted with thick, black and exaggerated sword eyebrows, the foundation on his face is mottled by sweat or tears, and his lips are red and delicate. The hair she was holding had been scattered, scattered to her neck and shoulders like a vine, a few self-curled stickers were attached to her forehead, she wiped her sweat with her sleeves indiscriminately, and before she could put away the look of surprise on her face, she was ready to put on an angry look, but the person who came reached out to help her cut her hair, she didn't know it for a while, and she shed tears of grievance.
Douda's tears fell from his right eye first, and he couldn't stop one after another, and all the grievances for many days came to his heart at this moment, his eyes were blurred, the tip of his nose was sour and unbearable, and his heart seemed to be blocked, and it was difficult to get out. didn't care about the embarrassment, and pushed him away: "Get up, good dogs don't get in the way!" β
Wen Ziqi grabbed it with his backhand, grabbed Liu Mianmian's arm, looked at her affectionately, and held her face with his other hand, rubbing it, wiping her tears, his thumb wandered on her lips, and before Liu Mianmian had time to react, his lips were blocked by a warm breath.
Scorching and soft. She trembled like electricity, and the lips that seemed to be cold and thin but extremely soft at the moment were clinging to her lips, Liu Mianmian's brain was blank, and she was stunned and had to leave from the Wenzi period.
After a long time, Wen Ziqi raised her bright and gentle eyes, and asked her in a hoarse voice: "Mianmian, are you still angry?" β
Liu Mianmian's face flushed, and at this moment she only felt soft, and wanted to find an object to lean on, so she could slow down, and simply sat down on the steps.
Wen Ziqi also sat down next to her, held her right hand, and stroked it in the palm of her hand like a baby.
"I've never been a big fan of noisy occasions, I remember what you say, and I understand what you want." Wen Ziqi smiled self-deprecatingly, took out a stone and handed it to Liu Mianmian: "But you have to believe me, you will feel very naΓ―ve when you recall the act of giving a gift on stage." He looked at Liu Mianmian with a smile and knocked her head by the way.
Liu Mianmian took the stone and looked at the black stone that looked like a human figure through the bright moonlight. Rubbing between his fingers, there seemed to be inscriptions on the stone. She looked up at Wenzi in confusion.
"Liu Mianmian, happy every day. September 2009. Wen Ziqi looked at her.
"You mean, you mean," Liu Mianmian suddenly tensed, "are the two of us okay?" β
Wen Ziqi was surprised: "Haven't we been okay a long time ago?" β
"Huh?" Liu Mianmian looked at him in disbelief, "When?" β
"We eat together, study together, read books in the library together, and most of the time we are together, aren't we in love?" Wen Ziqi reluctantly knocked her head again.
"But, but you never said that we were in love?" Liu Mianmian said urgently.
Wen Ziqi thought for a while and paused: "I'm also in love for the first time, every time I happen to miss you, you will appear, I think this is probably the same heart, only lovers stick together every day like us," He put down Liu Mianmian's hand and hugged her instead: "Besides, didn't they call you sister-in-law a long time ago~"
Liu Mianmian sighed, feeling indignant in her heart, and then grabbed one of Wen Ziqi's arms and bit it down.
Rao is a quiet person like Wenzi Period, and he screamed when he was suddenly smacked.
The next moment, "Dong Yong" suddenly got into his arms, arched his head vigorously, clutched the stone in his hand, and muttered: "Zi Period, I will have a while in my heart, the five flavors are mixed, both sour and bitter, astringent and sweet, I am really tired, let me rest for a while!" β
Wen Ziqi stopped talking, his lips pressed his forehead against her, and he hugged the person in his arms tightly. The beautiful scenery of a good day, the moonlight is very beautiful tonight.
Winter at the border is particularly long, and it is even colder in the morning and evening.
By the time three bottles of medicine were injected into the body, it was already dark. Liu Mianmian woke up, her neck was stiff, but her stomach was no longer painful. When I got up, I found a black down jacket.
The doctor prescribed some medicine, instructed a few precautions, and informed the consultation fee of 260 yuan. Liu Mianmian remembered that she didn't bring any money, so she went to the car to pick up her mobile phone with her down jacket.
When the door was opened, the person in the driver's seat flattened the seat, stretched his body and was lying flat to sleep, but unfortunately Liu Mianmian's mobile phone was placed in the net pocket behind the driver's seat, and he didn't know what to do for a while.
Liu Mianmian called him gently: "Sub-period~Sub-period~~"
Wenziqi was motionless, Liu Mianmian couldn't help but reach out and want to pat him, but his wrist was suddenly grabbed by Wenziqi. Suddenly, a pair of sharp eyes were staring at Liu Mianmian in puzzlement.
"I'll take off my phone," Liu Mianmian swallowed and said apologetically, "I'm disturbing your rest." β
The wrist he was holding was slender and smooth, and he hurriedly let go like an electric shock in the next second, Wen Ziqi immediately got up, opened the car door and went out, waiting for him to come back, Liu Mianmian sat in the passenger seat, and he didn't know how to bounce back the seat back, and smiled awkwardly at Wen Ziqi: "I'll go back and pay you back~"
Wenzi adjusted his seat, started the car, and said to himself: "You owe me more than this 260 yuan!" β
There are more than 3,000 days and nights of desolation, self-doubt and denial, a slump of sinking, love but can't, thinking incomprehensibly, heartache and sourness, at that time he wanted to choke her neck, only to ask why?
Why do you say that if you don't love, you don't love? Why is it said that you can completely let go if you leave? Why did such decisive words come out of her mouth?
Liu Mianmian, tell me why?!