Lead:

What is the essence of interpersonal communication? It's an exchange of interests, which is as simple as people having to eat. In this highly competitive society, we must put aside the outdated concept that "personal interests are everything", of course, you can be "self-interested", but self-interest does not necessarily have to be based on "harming others". We can often see some people who are not related by blood form a brotherly friendship, help each other, support each other, and form a "mutually beneficial" relationship.

In rural America, there lives an old man who decides to make his son an extraordinary person. So, he found Rockefeller, the richest oil magnate in the United States at the time, and said to him: "Dear Mr. Rockefeller, I want to find a partner for your daughter." Rockefeller said, "I'm sorry, I don't have time to think about it." The old man said, "Is that okay if the person I find for your daughter, your future son-in-law, is the vice president of the World Bank?" Rockefeller agreed. Then the old man went to the president of the World Bank and said to him, "Dear Mr. President, you should appoint a vice president right away!" Mr. President said, "No way, there are so many vice presidents here, why should I appoint a vice president, and it has to be right away?" The man said, "What if this vice president you appointed is Rockefeller's son-in-law?" The president of the World Bank readily agreed.

It's a story about mutual benefit. What is the essence of interpersonal communication? It's an exchange of interests, which is as simple as people having to eat. In this highly competitive society, we must put aside the outdated concept that "personal interests are everything", of course, you can be "self-interested", but self-interest does not necessarily have to be based on "harming others".

There is no perfect individual in this world, you are not perfect, he is not perfect, but if you can combine and learn from each other's strengths, you can achieve unexpected results. We can often see some people who are not related by blood form a brotherly friendship, help each other, support each other, and form a "mutually beneficial" relationship.

In real life, many people don't like the word "mutual benefit", and many people are taboo to associate interests with friends, thinking that if they admit that interests are the premise of friendship, they will be labeled as "snobbish", as if people make friends for a purpose, if someone is useless to me, then I will stay away from this person, this person is useful to me, and I will get close to him. In fact, most friends in life are made in the process of seeking common interests, and the more consistent the interests, the deeper the relationship. Although there are various contradictions between people, the cohesion of interests will make both sides run in, repair, and automatically seek balance. A person, whether in work, career or love, is inseparable from this kind of mutually beneficial relationship between people.

Zheng Yuanzhong, one of the founders of Zhuangji Group, was a well-known "electrical king" in Wenzhou in the early days of reform and opening up.

By chance, Zheng Yuanzhong met Chen Min, who was also engaged in clothing, and the two talked and hated to see each other late. So, after discussion, the two established Wenzhou Zhuangji Garment Co., Ltd. Soon, Wu Bangdong also joined in. The three of them perform their own duties in the company, each with their own strengths, and is known as the "Golden Triangle" by the industry.

At that time, the three of them were very open to the question of who would be the chairman. According to the shares, Zheng Yuanzhong is the natural chairman. However, Zheng Yuanzhong chose to let Chen Min be the chairman. As he said in the future: "Clothing should be made by people who understand clothing, Chen Min was the young marshal in the clothing industry in Wenzhou at that time, and the vice president of the clothing chamber of commerce, and he was definitely the best among the three people, and he was also young." ”

From the very beginning, the three agreed that Zhuang Ji's rights were in the board of directors, and the president was responsible for the leadership of the board of directors. The company never arranges for anyone's family members. Once, after Chen Min's nephew graduated from college, he wanted Zhuang Ji to work, but Chen Min refused. Today's Zhuangji, with clear equity and collective decision-making by the board of directors, has created many firsts: the first private enterprise in the country to use the brand as a pledge loan; The first private clothing culture research institute in Wenzhou and so on. Zhuang Ji also cooperated with many scientific research units such as China Academy of Art and Hangzhou Silk Institute, and successfully positioned Zhuang Ji as a high-level clothing brand.

There are many more examples of such collaborations:

There is a person who discusses the question of heaven and hell with God. God said to him, "Come! I'll show you what hell is. ”

They walked into a room. A group of people gathered around a large pot of broth, but everyone looked hungry and skinny. Each of them had a spoon that could reach the pot, but the handle was longer than their arm, and they couldn't get the soup into their mouths. There is broth that you can't drink in your stomach. I can only look at the "soup" and sigh, helpless.

"Come on! I'll show you heaven again. God led the man to another room. Everything here was the same as the room just now, a pot of soup, a group of people, the same long-handled spoons, but everyone was big and fat, and they were singing happily about happiness.

"Why?" The man asked, "Why can't the people of hell drink the broth, but the people of heaven can?" ”

God smiled and said, "Quite simply, here, they will feed others." ”

The story is not complicated, but it contains profound truths. The same conditions, the same equipment, why do some turn it into heaven and others run it into hell? The key is whether you choose to be mutually beneficial or just focus on your own interests.

In interpersonal communication, because individuals are limited in their abilities, they must cooperate and use each other in order to be successful. We don't have to blindly pursue so-called "friends without any utilitarian color", nor do we have to rashly complain that others don't have "friendship". We just need to admit frankly: mutual benefit is a basic principle of interpersonal communication; Both emotional and utilitarian is a regular strategy for interpersonal communication; Balance of needs and equality of interests is a necessary condition for interpersonal communication.

In this world, you can do without a confidant, but you must have many mutually beneficial friends. You don't necessarily have a good relationship in life, but you must have common interests in business. If you want to win friends, you must have a mutually beneficial relationship between you, which is a fundamental part of strengthening your relationship. With mutually beneficial friends, you can be invincible in the market competition.