…………………………

"Classmate A beat classmate B.

The teacher asked him, "Why did you hit someone?"

A replied that C had told him to beat him.

The teacher was very angry when he heard this, "If you want to beat you, you will beat you, and if you let you eat, will you eat it?" ”

After listening to this, Student A didn't say a word and left angrily.

After a while, the teacher hurriedly called the class leader, "Go and see what Student A is doing...... Hahaha.................. Second specialty, guess what he did! ”

The second specialist was helpless because of Lu Shuang's mystery joke,

"One more and another, A, B and C travel together,

A has a cold...... At night, everyone sleeps in the same bed, and A sleeps in the middle.

Midnight... A snorted a big sneeze, and B C's entire face was full of A's crystals.

B C: You'll let us know next time...... Half an hour later,

A: Attention... Hearing this, B C hurriedly got into the quilt and made sure that there was no communication with the outside world...

As a result, A farted ...... Hahaha.................."

The second specialist was helpless,

What would happen if she went out to say that she was the top student in the college entrance examination of Imperial Capital University, and this big star in the entertainment industry, looked at a little girl who was taciturn on TV, and was such a female nerve in private?

"Hahaha, it's so funny, it's so funny, one more and one more! Teacher: "Students, if you think you're stupid, please stand up." ”

The classmates looked at each other and didn't dare to stand up.

Only one bravely stood up,

Teacher: "Do you think you're stupid?" ”

Student: "No, teacher, I just don't want you to stand alone!" "Hahaha..................

I think this classmate will have a future in the future! What a future ahead! ”

Lu Shuang's very rational evaluation!

But the second college is completely helpless, which is really a bit fun!

"One more, one more! There was a child who was very close to his master. His master has a bad stomach.

One day, I taught my child and said, "Boy, when you go home and see people's families and don't say anything else, just say to him, "I know the truth of the matter!"

Guaranteed to have your benefits.

The kid learned.

As soon as I got home and saw my,

stepped forward and said: I know the truth of the matter.

When his mother heard this, her face turned white, and she quickly took out fifty yuan to tell the child: Baby, don't tell your father, Mom will give you fifty yuan and take it to spend."

After a while, he saw his father again, and he said: I know the truth of the matter!

When his father heard this, he didn't say a word, took out 200 to put the child in his hand, and told the child: Don't tell your mother!

This kid thought to himself, "I've made a fortune now."

I have found a way to get rich.

Everyone who saw me said I knew the truth of the matter. ”

Second specialty: ".............................."

"Honey, do you know the truth of the matter?"

"It's too deep in the play, Xiaoshuang!" The second specialist was helpless,

This hour of nonsensical time is finally coming in a steady stream of people,

The second college is finally relieved! Because it's afraid that if no one comes again, it may be that she and Xiaoshuang will be dead on the street the next day.

"The wife, who has always been known for being stern, taught her husband,

Don't be like some flowery men, carrying their wives behind their backs to mess with flowers outside.

The husband swore an oath:

"We don't have the heart or the guts; has that guts, but also doesn't have that money (money);

If you have that money, you don't dare to take that risk.

We can't afford to lose that person, we can't afford to see that eye.

Madame, please relax your heart, don't dare to kill your husband! "Hahaha.................. You can write it down! Admit the mistake in the future! ”

Lu Shuang obviously hasn't come out of the mood just now! It's fun to play by yourself!

"One more and one more: Teacher: Xiaoxin, please use: "dilemma" to form a sentence

Xiaoxin: I was in a dilemma during the exam

Teacher: Is it that you can't answer the question, which makes you in a dilemma?

Xiaoxin: No, it's because the answers of the left and right classmates are different, which makes me in a dilemma... Hahaha............ Don't worry, we never have to worry about such a thing! ”

What Lu Shuang said is true!

Lu Shuang was originally the first place, and the second college was the third place in the score of the test for choosing a finance and economics major!

The score line for finance and economics majors is relatively high..................

"Xiaoshuang, how did you get such a high score? You think you're about the same level of seriousness in class! "The point is,

In private, he is still so versatile, and his writing is also very good! It's all good!

Before, they were still in the dormitory, saying that Xiaoshuang was a person who made them jealous and didn't know why they were jealous........................

"It's just a casual test! It's a small thing! Don't care, don't care! Lu Shuang waved his hand,

What can he say? Can you say that he has a space?

Can you say that she was nearly a decade ahead of the world?

So she should go to the lab and be studied by a bunch of Frankenstein, right?

"Xiaoshuang, I feel .................. Like you, how can you film? You're studying abroad! ”

And the things of Xiaoshuang are also more expensive.

The family shouldn't have no money to afford Xiaoshuang to study abroad!

"Why do you want to study abroad? Why didn't you come out to study abroad? Lu Shuang asked rhetorically!

"I'm .................. It's too late to know when you sign up! Then it's a shame to miss it! ”

It's a pity to talk about this matter!

Her results have always been very good, and even with them, she has maintained the momentum of being the first!

But because I missed the time to apply for studying abroad, and then I missed the opportunity to study abroad!

I would have studied this matter if I had known it! Okay now, right? Still haven't been able to go abroad!

"Not necessarily! Some foreign schools have different registration times! However, you have already been in our school for another two weeks, so you have completely missed out on your registration! ”

Because the little guys who Lu Shuang gave to the celebrity class before have already learned about this matter! So Lu Shuang is also the head of the way when he talks about this matter!

"Xiaoshuang, I think you have a good personality! Since you're filming, why don't you sign up for the Imperial Capital Film Academy? I think that place is better for you! ”

This sentence is really said from the bottom of my heart!

Xiaoshuang's appearance really makes people want to eat her, it's so beautiful! It looks like Lu Shuang is very comfortable!

looks so good, why did you take the exam to come to Imperial Capital University?

"Because, I want to go to graduate school at Imperial Capital University! Others seem to have a stronger credibility in this school! ”

Lu Shuang's answer was direct!

"It's not easy to get to this school for the exam, we've just started school, why are you talking about these troublesome things? Come on, I'll tell you another joke! Let's get started! ”

Although Lu Shuang said hello in advance, the second specialist said that he still didn't want to listen to Lu Shuang's "cold jokes", but how could Lu Shuang let go of this little cutie so easily?

The chairman asked the new manager to speak before the dinner and told him that there were two requirements for speaking: 1. to have the demeanor of a leader, and 2. to have a slogan of charging into battle. The manager nodded and agreed. Before the dinner that day, the manager came to the stage to speak, only to see him raise his right hand high, and then wave it down vigorously, saying, "Ready, let's eat!" "Hahaha........................ Good job! This one isn't funny at all! ”

Lu Shuang realized his problem,

I didn't feel embarrassed at all, and I gave myself a step!

In the restaurant, one of the people said to the waiter, "I can't drink this soup." "The waiter said, I'm sorry, you wait, I'll go find the manager. The man said to the manager, "I can't drink this soup." "The manager said, I'm sorry, wait a minute, I'll go find the chef. The man said to the cook, "I can't drink this soup." The cook asked, "Why?" The man replied, "You didn't give me a spoon!" "Hahaha.................. Actually, this is okay ho, but this time doesn't seem to be so appropriate,"

The second specialist wanted to break open Lu Shuang's head to see what was inside.

How can you just think about it and be able to have an hour of brain teasers? And it doesn't come with a jam!

And Lu Shuang is naturally because there is a .............................. There's space! But this is called sir Lu Shuang knows, but the second specialist doesn't know!

"The principal and the English teacher went to visit a middle school in France together, the principal spoke in the auditorium, and the English teacher acted as a translator.

Principal: "Teachers and students! ”

English Teacher: "Ladies and gentlemen!" ”

Headmaster: "Ladies and gentlemen! ”

English Teacher -_-! After a moment's thought, he said, "Good morning! ”

Headmaster: "Good morning! ”

English Teacher: ......=="Khan

Hahaha.................. This principal is so cute! ”

Lu Shuang was very happy to see this,

Because Lu Shuang is always very busy, she didn't think that she could make some jokes live............ Be happy!

Now that she has found such a source of happiness, Lu Shuang doesn't want to let go!

"There was a polar bear, because the snow was so dazzling, he had to wear sunglasses to see things, but he couldn't find sunglasses, so he crawled around on the ground with his eyes closed, crawling and crawling, crawling and crawling dirty to find sunglasses. Put on sunglasses and look in the mirror, only to realize: Oh, it turns out that I am a panda! Hahaha............ So cute and cute! ”

Lu Shuang swayed left and right with a smile!

Even though the field is already getting people in! But because Lu Shuang and the second specialist came the earliest, they directly picked the best stand position.

And it's still the first row, but not many people pay attention to them here,

"Once upon a time there was a bird who would pass by a cornfield every day, but unfortunately one day there was a fire in that cornfield and all the corn turned into popcorn!! After the bird flies over...... I thought it was snowing, and I died of cold. Hahaha.................. Silly Bird Silly Bird! ”

Lu Shuang couldn't stop laughing!

Second specialization: "...................................."

Xiaoshuang really can't stop!

8. One day, three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope", and legend has it that if you stand on the edge of the valley and shout what you want, and then jump into the valley, you will get what you want. So the three of them decided to give it a try.

The first one was a pervert, so he shouted "Woman! Woman! "Jump down, and there are really beautiful women full of pits and valleys waiting for him.

The second was a nerd who shouted "Books and books and books!" "Then jump into the valley and get the book full of pits.

The third was an indecisive man, who could not decide what he liked the most, and after an hour he finally made up his mind that the money was the most useful, so he walked to the edge of the valley. Accidentally kicked a rock, he scolded "shit!" Unexpectedly, a center of gravity was unstable and fell down the valley. …………………… Forehead! Let's be honest! I don't know what this joke is about, I'll find you another joke haha.................."

Lu Shuang told all the jokes, and she didn't think it was funny!

That's embarrassing........................

The doctor asked the patient how he broke the bone, and the patient said, "I thought there was something in the shoe, so I held on to the telephone pole and shook the shoe, who knew that TMD a bastard passed by there, thought I was electrocuted, so he picked up a wooden stick and gave me two sticks..................

The second specialist also knew Lu Shuang's routine! I don't cooperate with Lu Shuang anymore!

"The tortoise and the hare race, and the hare quickly ran to the front, and the tortoise crawled behind. When he saw a snail crawling very slowly, he said to the snail, "Come up, I'll carry you." Then the snail climbed up. After a while, the tortoise saw another ant and said to him, "Come up too!" With the ants also climbing; Up. When the ant went up, he saw the snail on it, and he said "hello" to the snail. He said, "Hurry up, this turtle is so fast." Hahahaha........................ This cute little snail! ”

……………………

The second specialist was lying on Lu Shuang's body and playing with his mobile phone,

Lu Shuang continued to tell jokes tirelessly, this joke was so funny, and her tears came out of laughter:

"The turtle and the snail lived together, and once the turtle was injured and asked the snail to help him buy medicine. After 2 hours, the snail has not returned. The turtle was anxious and scolded loudly: "TMD, if you don't come back, Lao Tzu will die!" At this time, the voice of a snail came from outside the door: "You TM said that Lao Tzu is not going!" (Haha...) This snail is also slowing down.) Hahaha........................ This is a tie-in to the previous joke! ”

Lu Shuang laughed loudly!

Second specialty: ".............................."

"Xiaoshuang, don't you have any particularly optimistic boys? We're girls! Usually you should talk about some celebrity gossip, but if you really can't! It's okay to talk about the topic! We keep saying this.................. Jokes, I feel like I've wasted my life! Isn't it? ”

The second specialist wants to bring Lu Shuang back on track!

But Lu Shuang has obviously gone astray!

Because Lu Shuang's appearance has lasted for an hour, Lu Shuang feels that this matter is still very good! And it's very, very good........................

At least it's much more useful than crying..................

Because you can't do anything but cry!

At least you can make yourself happy!