Chapter 57: But I don't know it when I'm young
When she reappeared in front of me, it was still late at night, but it wasn't as bright. It has recently opened to the public because of the construction of a new building and the school is about to be turned into a school building.
I didn't let go as much as I used to, I just leaned on the railing and thought about some trivial things, and if there was a pack of cigarettes, it would be more in line with my current state of mind.
It was she who called me first, she didn't call my name, she said, "Long time no see." β
I wasn't too excited or excited, because I probably thought that she wouldn't come at all, after all, frustration is a daily thing, but to be honest, there will be a second of warmth in my heart.
"yes, long time no see!"
I turned around and looked at her silently, as if that would make up for the lost time. You don't need the approval of others, you just need to think about it.
I rubbed my lips, "How are you doing?" β
Seeing that some people will become difficult to speak, they can't even say literary and artistic words like safe and sound, only ordinary words like firewood, rice, oil and salt can be extracted from their minds.
"Okay, not good, but so what?"
She was still some distance away from me, and she actually blamed me for saying this, but her face seemed to have been put down, because there was no trace of impetuousness.
"How are you and Xu Chule?"
I don't know why I said such a thing, in fact, not only was she surprised, but I was also surprised in hindsight, maybe I had been holding back for too long, too many things can happen in 7 days.
"Did you come to me today and ask this? But I'm not one of yours, so the answer is meaningless. β
I slowly approached her, just in time to see the face in the dim starlight, still unchanged, always so arrogant and unique.
"Maybe it doesn't make sense, but I still want to know the answer, I want to hear you say no, I want to hear you say that you still have me in your heart, I want to say that I like you."
There was a different emotion in her eyes, maybe it was because it was the first time I had said so much to her.
Seeing that she didn't react, I laughed at myself and said, "What I want to say has been said, maybe it's ridiculous and naΓ―ve, but it's not important anymore, you can refuse." β
At that time, I had already turned to the side, in fact, my heart was painful to death, and I was going to show my full love before I came, but at this moment I said the exact opposite.
Just as I waited for a ruthless rejection, she crept up to me, "No, we're just friends." β
I turned my face to be only a few centimeters away from her, and I was really excited at that moment, and I even smiled.
"Do you still like me?"
I can't control the long-suppressed doubts in my heart, and I really hope that all the grievances will be resolved at once today.
She looked at me affectionately, in fact, she also thought about it for a long time, why should she go against her heart when she likes it very much.
"I like it."
I didn't say anything more and took her into my arms, putting one hand around her waist and the other caressing her head. Her hair was soft and fragrant, and it had grown below the shoulders.
Because of her height, her head was resting on my chest, and I could hear my heartbeat. Her face was already hot, and her hands began to move up around my waist.
"Actually, I've always missed you and cared about you, but I've always shown that I don't care, I'm sorry."
I hugged her a little tighter, "Don't be sorry, you never have to say sorry if you like someone." β
"Actually, I'm really afraid of losing it, I've been through it for so many years, and I thought I could keep that feeling of silently liking. But then Xu Qing appeared in your life, and I began to be jealous of her and began to feel a sense of loss. It wasn't until later that Xu Qing left again, and I saw your loneliness. I would like to rush up to warm you and give you happiness. Even though I know that this seems to you to be just a temporary reliance when you are frustrated, and you will leave me when you wake up, I don't care. But I was really sad about that sentence at the station, and I had never been so dead-hearted......"
"It's my fault, now I'm not leaving, I'll be with you well."
I interrupted her and grabbed her arms. Before I knew it, she was already crying, and this was the first time I saw her crying, and I was very distressed.
A person will cry in front of you, proving that she has let down her guard against you, that she acquiesces in your comfort, or that she wants to confide in you.
I was about to wipe away her tears, but she wiped them herself, and she pulled a postcard out of her pocket. She held it in her hand and showed it to me, "I received it, and although it was late, I was still very happy." β
I didn't give her the gift, but I sent her the postcard. Some of the things that were said above, all memories of high school, and those were all the good moments that I can still remember. It turned out that there were so many common shots between us, and on the day I wrote it, I realized that we were so compatible in my memory, but I didn't know it when I was young.
But I didn't talk about it in it, because I said that unknown secrets are more desirable.
I smiled and said to her, "It's good to be happy, I hope you'll always be happy." β
She quietly looked down at the ground, and after a while raised her head to meet my eyes, "You don't think there's one more thing you haven't explained, right?" β
As she approached her whole face and was about to put it on me, I said questioningly, "Is there one?" β
The expectant picture did not appear, and she chose to retract the intimate act at that 0.01 second. She turned and walked to the other side with her hands behind her back.
"Actually, you gave those gifts."
As soon as I heard that this was the case, I didn't expect her to be stupid, it turned out that she always knew.
"I didn't know it at first, I thought it was someone who had a crush on me, as you said. But once in the boutique, I happened to see you, but you didn't notice me. I watched you pick out the gift behind you, watched you pay the money, and I wondered which girl was so happy? It's just that a few days later, when I opened the gift in the drawer, I finally understood everything, and it turned out that the person who had been giving gifts was you. Whatever the reason, I was really moved, and I decided that you were there, but after that, I still pretended not to know that you gave it to me. β
When she said this, I realized that my careful thinking had already been seen through, but when I heard about it in other people's mouths, I would have a completely different feeling, fate is a wonderful thing.
I looked at the postcard in my hand and thought that sentence was very interesting - I once said in front of you how far away the stars are, only to find out later that I am the star, your guardian star.
At this time, the sky seemed to be streaked by a meteor, in fact, I knew that it was just a phenomenon of cosmic debris burning through the atmosphere and glowing, but it still felt beautiful, so at that moment we were all looking at the starry sky.
She suddenly said, "Do you want to see the Big Dipper?" β
Looking back and smiling, Bai Meisheng probably feels like this, the person who used to say this seems to be me, but I am less than one-tenth of her chic.