After that night, there was no news of Li Yunxiang for several days. Although the mobile phone is turned on at the maximum volume, I will still take it out for a while, and take it out for a while, for fear of missing Li Yunxiang's phone. Finally, I couldn't stand it anymore and called him, but it kept turning off the phone. I hate that voice now, a wooden-ground girl, repeating over and over again: Hello, the user you dialed is turned off. This sentence is like a judge pronouncing a sentence on death row. Every time I make a phone call, I am full of hope, but what I am waiting for is not the happy moment when the phone is connected, but this blunt female voice.

Li Yunxiang, Li Yunxiang. I'm thinking about you, you know what?

In the past few days, every time I finished working in the Zou family's mansion, Zou Jialiang personally drove me back. The old lady of the Zou family also became more and more kind towards me day by day. In fact, I regret asking Zou Jialiang for help last time. He is such a big rich man, I only lend him 10,000 yuan, not to mention a dime, the proportion of 900 cattle is less than a dime. Every time I spend time alone with him these days, it's so awkward. Hey, try to save money and give it back to him. But the burden of the salary earned every month is almost the same in the family, and the balance still needs to rent and eat. It seems that it is still necessary to return to the old business and set up a stall.

I took out my phone again and looked at it, but there was still no phone call or message from Li Yunxiang. I let out a deep breath and stuffed my phone back into my bag. If you don't fight, don't fight, damn, can I blame all this? Every time things were coincidentally incredible, but he didn't give me any chance to explain. Always with your own preconceived notions. Does this kind of affection stand the test of time?

About two minutes later, the phone rang! I'm really surprised, Li Yunxiang, I look forward to the stars and the moon, and finally I hope for your call. I quickly pulled my phone out of my bag, and when I saw the name flashing on the screen, I was instantly disheartened.

Caller ID "Boss". Oh my God, it really makes me happy.

"Hey." I picked it up listlessly.

"Yaya, I really thank you for doing me such a big favor this time." As he spoke, the boss began to feel sentimental again.

"Don't say that, we're all urban outlanders now, and we're definitely going to help each other." I comforted her.

"Yaya, I'll go to the hospital for surgery tomorrow morning, can you stay with me?"

"Okay, I'll accompany you." Hanging up the phone, I deeply sympathized with the boss. Women are most likely to be in a vulnerable position when they are in love. Men are rational animals, and women are emotional animals. If a relationship really comes to an end, men tend to think rationally, but girls are different, girls tend to lose control of their emotions and don't know why, so that some thorny problems will be formed.

When I was in college, an old professor who taught "Obstetrics and Gynecology". It was once said that when asking a female patient about her medical history, she must ask about the other party's pregnancy and childbirth history, because it is impossible for a woman not to have a miscarriage in her life. This remark caused an uproar throughout our classrooms at the time. The students were all talking, the girls were shyly bowing their heads, the boys were discussing loudly, I looked at the old professor's face full of meaning, and finally added: "Girls, you must be clean and self-loving." ”

What is the difference between a girl and a woman? I discussed it with Mimi, the boss, Su Xiaoyu and the other sisters in the dormitory. The boss and Xiaoyu agreed that any girl who has experienced the "first night" is a woman. Mimi thinks that she can only become a woman after marrying a man, and she is always a girl before marriage. I don't have the same opinion as them, I don't think there is much difference between girls and women, anyone who has an idea of love and the opposite sex can be called a woman, and they don't think much of me.

But no matter what the way we think about it, the boss has become a woman before us. How long does a woman have to go through pain and ups and downs in her life before she can achieve positive results. In addition to the pain in the lower abdomen that cannot be shaken off by the visit of "old friends" every month, the unforgettable pain that must be experienced on the night of candles in the cave room, and the pain of pregnancy and abortion that ordinary people can bear. These are essential to become a real woman, but to be a strong woman, these pains are multiplied.

The next day, I accompanied my boss into the gynecology department of the central hospital. The boss made an appointment in advance, and the operation had been scheduled in advance, so we sat quietly in the corridor outside the operating room and waited for someone to call the number.

"Are you afraid?" I shook the boss's cold hand.

"A little." She looked nervous and rested her head on my shoulder.

"There is anesthetic, it won't hurt, you can sleep peacefully, and you'll be fine when you wake up." I patted her on the back.

"Am I being too selfish to do this?" She said leisurely, "I made a mistake in a moment's time, but let the child pay." ”

"Honey, it's not like that, it definitely knows that you love it very much, but now that you are forced to helpless, I believe the baby will understand you." My heart was also starting to feel sad because of the boss's infection.

"Really? Why did you come to me? She touched her lower abdomen and muttered to herself, two crystal tears falling on her lower abdomen, which had not yet seen a bulge. A woman's motherhood is really innate, even if sometimes she is ruthless to abandon something, but when it really comes to the moment of withdrawal, she is so reluctant.

"Next, Guo Ziying." A nurse wearing a mask shouted with a notebook. The boss still sat and stared blankly at his lower abdomen.

"Guo Ziying." The nurse called a second time, and the impatience was clearly audible. I tapped the boss on the shoulder, and she suddenly came to her senses.

"Guo Ziying." The nurse's voice rose another decibel.

"I am, I am." The boss hurriedly replied.

"What's the matter with you? I didn't make a sound after calling it a few times, if I didn't think about it, I would go home and think about it, what about a lot of people in the back? "The little nurse is wearing a mask, her face is really small, this mask covers most of her face, I can only see her tangled eyebrows, and two small eyes like mung beans, all in all, it's so fucking ugly!

"Sorry, I didn't hear that." The boss hurriedly stood up and apologized.

"Really, come in with me, delay the matter."

The boss turned around and handed me her bag, "Yaya, you can help me get it first, wait for me." There was an element of pleading in her tone.

"Don't be afraid, I'm not going anywhere, I'm waiting for you here." I shook her hand firmly.

She nodded to me and walked into the operating room. I hugged my boss's bag and sat down again. Although the weather is now past the cold season, there is still a while before the frost falls.

"The leaves are pale, and the white dew is frost." Every time I come to this solar term, I will think of such a sentence in the Book of Songs. Sitting in front of the operating room door, I shivered all the time. This cold does not penetrate through the superficial skin, but emits emanating from the heart, and it is the cold breath in my heart.

I thought that the Boss must be lying on the cold operating table, spreading his legs apart, letting the cold and relentless surgical instruments sway through every corner of her lower abdomen. It was originally a crystallization of myself and my lover, but I couldn't watch it take root and sprout like a seed and grow into a tree, and now I can only helplessly discard it in the cold operating room. In fact, when a woman has an abortion, she is not afraid of the pain of her own body, but the reluctant and helpless heartbreak when the embryo is really separated from her body.

Will I be like the boss, one day lying on the operating table, accepting everything that is irreparable, accepting the fact that I can't accept it? There were many temporary beds outside the operating room, and the girls came out of the operating room one by one, staggering, holding their brains that were not yet fully awake, swaying from side to side, and falling on the beds.

During my internship, the youngest girl I met who had a miscarriage was only 13 years old, and when I was 13 years old, I was still ignorant of the words hidden among adults, and I knew every day that I would go to school, eat homework, and eat homework and go to school. This reminds me of some things that a friend who traveled to Thailand told me before: Thailand is a country of faith, and 99% of the people believe in Theravada Buddhism, so as long as a girl there is pregnant, the child must be born, and abortion is illegal in the local area, and it is completely a sinful thing.

In just a while, several girls came in and out. I don't know how many embryos have been strangled in the cradle this morning.

"Guo Ziying's family." The operating room was opened, and the nurse was calling out to me, so I quickly stood up, "Come, help me." ”

The boss's body was now soft as a ball of cotton, leaning on my shoulder. His body trembled, and he said indistinctly, "I'm cold." ”

I hugged her tightly and helped her to the hospital bed in the hallway, "It's okay, it's all over." "I took off my coat and covered the boss, her body curled up into a ball, and her chapped lips turned purple one by one.

"Is it still cold?" I crouched on the edge of the bed and gently stroked her hair.

"Well, Yaya, I'm so sad, I think I'm so sorry for this child." Her tears flowed again.

"Don't be sad, there are some things we really don't have the right to choose." My face pressed against her forehead, "You can sleep for a while." "I'm watching you from here.

She meekly closed her eyes, turned her back to the outside, and I found a stool in the hallway and sat down. The boss may have suffered a lot of physical loss, or it may be that the power of the anesthetic has not been over, and she fell asleep deeply. I looked at her delicate waistline and slender thighs, who could have imagined that such a youthful and energetic girl, the sister I had been with day and night before, had experienced such a heart-rending pain in which operating room. She wanted to keep the little bud, but she couldn't find a reason to keep it.

I lowered my head and covered my whole face with my hands, and the things that happened for a while were one after another, each of which was a bombshell, so that I didn't have time to take the call, let alone have time to breathe. And difficult sisters like Tang Mimi and the boss also have accidents one after another, what's wrong with us? What's wrong with the world, and why is life a mess like the Big Bang?