Humanity is forever afraid of the unknown.

That's probably the justification of our existence.

Sometime in December. Early in the morning, the snow fell and swirled in the air. My husband was sitting in the courtyard, and he said the same thing to me when I handed me the bag that had just been filled with boiling water.

"Why does it exist?"

He had dark, deep ink-pool-like eyes, and he looked straight at me, but the kind smile that always hung on his face was still there.

"You must have a lot of questions."

I was like a cat caught stealing, with no place to put its paws and face. I had to deliberately avoid his gaze, lest his constant coercion overwhelm me. But just facing the husband is always like a child's shame in the face of the tenderness of his mother's forgiveness. I was ashamed that I knew nothing and learned nothing. I was even more ashamed that I would never see the "other side" that my husband wanted me to see.

"Humanity is forever afraid of the unknown. So do we. In between speaking, he lifted the lid of his cup and took a sip of the new tea on the table, "This is the rationality of our existence." Remember, to exist is to be reasonable. ”

"Of course, this is what Hegel said." He smirked.

Confusion used to be like a veil, which made me look like a shadow, but now it was more like a fishing net, trapping me, tightly binding, and the fishing ropes like a curse slashing into the flesh. I was the first person to be here in such a long time. Sir told me so. But the more confused I became, I had forgotten what was pulling me forward, how far I had walked, what I had set out for, who was waiting for me to go back...

It is surrounded by bamboo forests and sometimes chirping birds.

It seems to be an inevitability.

"You're bound to come here." December is the only one left in memory.

However, I don't remember much about December of that year. What my husband gave me, I will use for the rest of my life. Today, as I write these words, I still look forward to the future, for which day, for that day.

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