Chapter Twenty-Eight: A Life of Helplessness
The moonlight outside the window was beautiful, and I couldn't count the first time it had been in front of my bed.
At this moment, I will not lift the quilt, jump to the ground and tear open the window curtains fiercely, saying that I never pull the window curtains, preventing me from appreciating the lovely moonlight, but it is not good, and then, chanting a poem loudly: "The bright moonlight in front of the bed is frost on the ground." Raise your head to look at the bright moon and bow your head to think of your hometown. "I was back in bed, and I was going to do what I was going to do, as if I was sure that I could continue to dream.
I don't think Li Bai has ever been as infatuated with this poem as Bai Yun, and maybe he can be angry with Bai Yun. Otherwise, Bai Yun's heart doesn't know how much regret he has buried, and he regrets that he shouldn't have studied hard at the beginning and would only memorize such a poem. Day after day, year after year, the wife's ears were blistered, and he was abandoned, and with the disappearance of the two front teeth, the quality of the voice of the poem became less and less than before.
Alas! A sigh is useless for Bai Yun, and all emotions are condensed in that poem.
At this moment, the reason why I remembered Bai Yun was because when I was waiting for the bus at the bus station after work today, I suddenly heard a weak voice behind me shouting: "Hello Auntie!" "I looked back and looked, oh! It turned out to be sweet.
"Tiantian, how can you be yourself? Why are you going? I squatted down nervously and said with a sweet little hand.
"Auntie, I went out with my dad, and he was standing behind the license plate, you see." After Tian Tian finished speaking, she pointed to the two thighs with gray pants that were exposed behind the license plate and said that it was.
I let go of my nervousness and followed my sweet gaze, where the sign on the bus stop obscured the upper body of the two gray pants thighs.
Tian Tian took me by the hand and called out to her dad. The two thighs in gray pants spun out from behind the license plate, and for a moment I knew that it was Bai Yun who didn't run, because he had two front teeth.
We nodded at each other, and neither of us said anything.
I guess Tian Tian must have told her father about the people and things in the cuckoo company when she came home, otherwise how could Bai Yun be so calm, just like I knew how Bai Yun's front teeth fell off for so long and didn't make a fake stick.
The sky suddenly rained, and it happened that a very fast bus drove into the station, and after Tiantian followed Baiyun to get on the bus, she kept waving her little hand to me. I also waved my hand at her, but my heart was inexplicably a little sour. Tian Tian was wearing a small coat with a black placket button, a little old lady with a small face, if she let the cuckoo look at it, maybe she would be angry.
The light rain seemed to be passing by here, and after falling in a hurry, it hurried away again. The umbrella that I had just found in the mouth was not opened in a hurry, and it was not lowered again.
Cuckoo learned it from me once, and he was so angry.
Du Juan has a colleague who got married, and the night before, on the phone, Bai Yun was asked to dress up sweetly, what kind of hair he combed, which clothes to wear, which skirt, which pair of shoes, and which pair of socks were properly explained, and asked Bai Yun to send them to the station the next morning, and Du Juan would pick them up.
The next morning, the cuckoo waited stupidly at the station for more than half an hour, and the wedding was almost a little bit, and Bai Yun was late with Tiantian. At a glance, sweetly dressed, the cuckoo was talking and crying at the time. It can be seen that the incident mentioned by the cuckoo touched the sore spot in her heart.
Du Juan said that the white cloud shoes Tara socks fell off, and Tian Tian was still wearing dirty pajamas, her hair was not combed, and her face was not washed, like a little flower child. At a cold glance, the two men had just crawled out of the bed. The cuckoo said that her lungs were about to explode, and she was about to scold Bai Yun, but when she turned around, Bai Yun crossed the road and took the car back.
It's too late, the wedding is about to start, what can I do?
The cuckoo said that he had promised my girl that I would take her to the wedding, and I couldn't speak. Du Juan said that she raised her eyes and saw a Kender chicken store not far away, so she pulled Tian Tian up and ran into the bathroom of the store, washing Tian Tian's little face and hands clean. While washing Tiantian's little face, Cuckoo said that she was crackling and shedding tears, the makeup she had just painted in the morning was messed up, my girl asked me what was wrong, Cuckoo said that she picked up a handful of cold water and threw it on her face.
After calming down for more than ten minutes, Cuckoo said that she did her best to pull Tiantian's clothes neatly, and the little slippers on her feet Cuckoo said that she wiped them clean with her hands in the bathroom. Du Juan, who plucked up the courage to lead Tian Tian into the wedding scene, told me that the eyes of the worldly people don't need me to talk nonsense here, as long as it doesn't hurt my girl's self-esteem.
Later, I also heard a lot of talkers in the unit, saying that my girl was very original.
At this point, the cuckoo stopped talking, it was originally a mouth that could not be closed, but now it is silent.
I can't imagine what a force this is, but behind it is a gloomy mood.
Life, sweet and sour, bitter, spicy and salty. If you knock over this sour jar, the sour smell will spread, and after dyeing its body, it will penetrate its intestines, and when the nose is sour, the heart will inevitably be sour, and tears will naturally fall.
This matter has been told to me for a long time, but in my heart it has not become shallow or even forgotten with the passage of time.
How much better can I be than the cuckoo? My child is only three years older than Tian Tian, although he eats his body very fat now, although he disapproves of his father's habits, I have never heard him criticize his father, and when he criticizes me, he has been in one set, and it is the same today.
But his heart has always been growing healthily, at least I think so, of course, I don't approve of him eating very fat, and I've been trying my best to control his open mouth to eat, most of the time in vain.
In those years, I was also annoyed that I couldn't buy him pants with the right waist. Especially in the summer, when the weather is so hot, he wears a short-sleeved T-shirt inside, and he has to wear a spring and autumn school uniform outside, mostly because he is afraid of being teased by his classmates for his fat big breasts.
Maybe in his world, the excess fat on these sensitive parts of the body is enough to make him feel shy, and he would rather cover his body with white hair and sweat and suffer a handful of good crimes, rather than let his classmates know.
Perhaps, when I accompanied him through this time, I had nothing but the feeling that I should let him study harder and continue to control his diet. But today, when I put pen to paper to recall these days, the more I write down the recollection, the more I blame myself so much that I can't help myself, and even when I mention something like a cuckoo, tears are still crackling down. I really want to go back to those days and say to him, "I'm sorry, Mom did too badly." ”
Time seems to be a big river that is boundless, and you who stand on a small boat and follow the torrent can not turn back, and even the memories are carried out in the process of moving forward.
Who can save a minute of time, and who can turn back a minute of time, even if it is only half a second?
In front of the torrent of time rushing by, everything was pale. In addition to cherishing the people around us, what can we leave behind and not be forgotten? Unless it is the vicissitudes of the sea recorded in those historical texts that have become mulberry fields.
I used to think very narrowly that this is nothing more than the world of adult marriage and affection.
Those so-called loyal and unswerving love are just a fairy tale for Cuckoo and me.
Just talking about the old husbands and wives who show affection in front of them, most of them are not all for others to see. It's not that there are couples who love each other to old age, but I can't think of a way to think that if one is gone, the other will still be alive? In the end, it didn't follow alive. It's better to be drunk in addition to quarreling like this, and the quarreled and drunk feelings pass like a handful of yellow sand in the hands of the so-called husband and wife in the inadvertent years. When I looked back one day, I realized that I couldn't tell what it was like to be in it.
Two people who have different views on life but live together alive, I think, both have a stomach full of bitter water. At midnight it poured down with the moonlight, and the color was silver like teardrops.
Just like the dream itself, behind the brief bloom in a short sleep, there is a series of continuations caused by the events and interactions with people that I experienced during the day.
It's not so much the dream that disturbs your sleep, it's what you do during the day that causes your dream.
Perhaps, every day there are so many people in this city who pass by you, but why is this person who stays by your side so special?