Qing Ling didn't dare to look at me when she came back, especially not daring to look me in the eyes as usual, and occasionally I looked at her, and her eyes were full of exhaustion.

I didn't know what to say, but I thought about it for a long time, but what I wanted to say went around a few corners of my mouth, and finally I just reluctantly pulled the corners of my mouth, and I asked, "Qingling, didn't you tell Master to ask Master to take you to eat?" ”

I looked at Qing Ling's don't start, the corners of my mouth just had a smile on my lips, and I said very far-fetchedly, "Master, tomorrow, I'm a little tired today." ”

I watched her go back to her room, not daring to ask anything, just standing there, motionless and staring at her closed door.

It's my fault, it's my own wrongdoing, it's my own sin, so I think I've actually lost her.

I boiled some tea, the tea fragrance is faint, mixed with some evening primrose, the night is a little cool, it is good to taste a sip of hot tea.

I just sat like this, taking a sip of tea from time to time, and I don't know when, the tea will be cold.

There are no stars in the night sky tonight, and there is no moon. The night hangs like this, lonely and pure.

I don't know how long it was, Qingling got up at night, saw that I was still sitting in the courtyard, came over to put on my clothes, and asked, "Master, why hasn't he slept yet?" ”

I replied, "After drinking some tea, I'm feeling a little refreshed, so I got out of bed and looked at the flowers." ”

Qing Ling touched the teacup and said softly, "The tea is cold, Master will go and rest later, it's late at night." ”

I touched her head and said, "You go and rest first, I'll go later." ”

In fact, I saw it, when I touched Qing Ling's head, Qing Ling subconsciously dodged, but it quickly recovered. Qing Ling's small actions are actually a lot, but this one is the most hurtful, and I knew it very well at that time, in fact, she already knew the truth, but she didn't say it.

How long can such days live? Obviously, both of us actually know the truth, but we have to try our best to hide it in front of each other, afraid that the other party will know what we fear the most in our hearts.

It's impossible to live a lifetime like this.

Take it one step at a time, it seems like all I can do is.

I waited, I was actually ready, ready to be killed by Qing Ling, if I was killed by her, it would actually be a relief, I never blamed her.

I don't have the right to blame her.

I never had the energy to go back to my room to rest, but as the night gradually set, I watched the sun slowly rise again, and the sadness in my heart did not seem to have disappeared because of this night's repentance.

Qing Ling looked at me and was still wearing the cloak she had put on for me at night, frowned and said, "Master, have you not rested all night?" She walked up to me, seemed to see the blue under my eyes, and whispered, "The bottom of my eyes are blue." ”

I tried to reach out and rub her head and tell her I was okay, but the last hand stopped. I looked away from her, and she bowed her head.

I asked, "Let's go, let's go to the town and eat good, and Master will take you there." ”

What I want is that at least until we all muster up the courage, let's have a good time.

Qing Ling lowered his head, I went back to the room and put down the cloak, Qing Ling looked up at me, the corners of his mouth raised slightly. She probably didn't feel it herself, she hadn't laughed happily in a long time these days.

The corners of her mouth were actually more distressing than anything else, and I would rather she rush up to me at this time and ask me why I did such a thing, and I didn't want to see her like this.

There were a lot of people in the bazaar, it was lively, and we also walked around the shop tacitly, and I bought all the little things she liked, regardless of whether they were expensive or not. When I came out of a shop, a shopkeeper quipped, "I really envy your young lady, you have such a good relationship." ”

I just looked at her and smiled wryly at her.

To be good to her in this way, to be good to her for this reason, I think she should be very sad in her own heart.

I watched her pour herself cup by cup on the table, and I didn't even have the courage to stop her.

I watched her drink wine as water, if it had been before, I would have scolded her a few words, saying that she should not drink so much as a girl, but I also remember her uncomfortable appearance after knowing the truth.

I can't stop her, and I probably don't deserve to stop her.

What qualifications do I have? I am the enemy who destroyed her family, I am a liar who has been deceiving her from beginning to end, I am an irresponsible master, what qualifications do I have to say about her?

I listened to Qingling burp and then lie on the table, seemingly drunk.

I hesitated for a long time, listened to her babbling something, lowered my head and listened carefully to her, in fact, what she said was, "I like Master the most, why is it Master." ”

I even watched her tears fall again, drop by drop.

My ears kept replaying what she said, and she said, "Why is it Master?" ”

She couldn't kill me, and neither did I.

She was brought up by me, and although I had three years of her life free, she was still my only disciple, and the last memory I have in this world.

I said, "I don't know if you're still awake, maybe only when you're drunk I can tell you that Master actually loves you very much, really." But what I have done is irreversible. ”

Maybe that's the only time I can say to her, "I'm sorry. ”

I watched her cry, I didn't know how sober she was, how drunk she was, I listened to her crying out in a suppressed voice, "Daddy, mother." ”

Her home is a pain that can never be erased from her heart in this life, and it has always remained in her heart and has become an insurmountable blood.

I carried Qingling Qingling home, she lay on my back, breathing little by little on my body, I can clearly feel that this person is now by my side, I feel very good.

It's just that there is no such time anymore.

In the middle of the night, I actually heard Qingling walking into my room, and I could even feel her hands clenching the dagger, and I could feel the cold light on the dagger.

I thought, after all this time, did she finally make up her mind to kill me?

It was supposed to be a sad time, but there was a hint of relief in my heart. If I die, it'll be over.

But I waited for a long time and the blade never fell on me, and I listened to her breathing gradually become shorter, and tears fell to the ground one by one. I listened to her ask, "Why Master, but why Master?" ”

As I listened to her cry bitterly, I suddenly remembered that when I had only met her many years ago, she asked me to go to rest, and in fact I couldn't help crying. I was awake at the beginning, and I am awake now.

It never seemed to have changed, and for a moment I felt like I was back in the beginning, when she was a child.

But what is past is in the past, and there is no going back.