Chapter 31: Atonement (2)

The sky grew fast, and suddenly the wind rose on the ground, and the dark clouds weighed down on the city, and the sky darkened for a moment, and it was too cold to resist, and the stove that warmed my hands fell to the ground, and rolled a few times and stopped at my feet, and the sound it made was immediately drowned out by the cracking of the pots

My legs were numb, my body was crooked, my hand knocked down the shelf, and by the way, the pot of red flowers on the shelf fell apart, and it fell into mud and dust, and I lost my mind and looked at the fragments of the pot, and I wanted to cry without tears

A pot of flowers at the end of the pot Why is it broken when it is broken?

Why is a good relationship broken off?

How do I want to accept Li Xuan as my father's killer and think of him as a person who will do whatever it takes to achieve his goals

The door of the study was naturally opened, and Dugu Hao was the first to come out, and he swept me with compassion and turned to leave, and he couldn't bear to look at me more In his opinion, I should be the most ridiculous person in the world I was confused by Li Xuan, and I killed my father, not to mention that I even married an enemy I think I am the happiest person in the world In the end, I am just the biggest joke in the world

I didn't have time to think through more details, and I didn't even have the courage to look at the sympathy on Qi Ao's face again

Walking out of the Qin Mansion in a daze I was already wet and transparent The biting cold seeped into every inch of my body The originally thick and warm coat became cold and heavy after being stained with rain Every step is a little difficult In the vast world and suddenly there is only a single me left I am like a lonely ghost wandering on the empty street The world is so big that there is no place for me

I finally have nothing to lose The day the year came to an end, I completely lost Li Xuan, and the illusion of our deep love between husband and wife only lasted for three short years, and I exchanged a few months of time for these three years, but I used these three years to exchange these three years for the desolation of the rest of my life, so it's not ironic

It's ridiculous that fate plays tricks on me, and I have nowhere to escape from the beginning There is no one in this world who can resist fate, and I am no different

There was no end in sight to this road, I didn't know where it leads, and my little strength was quickly exhausted, and I stumbled and fell to the ground, and my clothes and face were splashed with muddy water on the ground, and I was dirty, and my body was numb with pain, and my whole body was even more embarrassed

On the last day of the year, I was so desolate

However, the rain above my head did not fall on my weak and thin body and ran out of my head without looking back Qi Ao has been silently following me In a hurry to catch up with me, he didn't even bother to open the umbrella He was also drenched He has been like this since he was a child But whenever I am unhappy, he is with me without saying a word and endures with me

Ever since I saw him as a child, I was accustomed to relying on him with a fortitude and composure that far surpassed that of children my age, and I selfishly enjoyed his protection and pity, and deliberately ignored his vague feelings for me, and I owed him so much, and he never felt sorry for me

Qi Ao squatted down and held the umbrella for me, his eyes were full of regret Once upon a time, the imperial doctor instructed me not to let the cold enter my body anymore This broken body really can't withstand the toss It's just that it's raining I'm dizzy and dizzy in front of my eyes What is more uncomfortable than the pain in my body is a heart in my chest

I have unspeakable despair and helplessness in my heart I have worked so hard with Li Xuan to get to where we are today Crossing all the obstacles and tribulations that stand in front of us But suddenly there is no future How can I not be sad The hatred of killing my father is not shared Li Xuan and I don't even have the last point of possibility

I stared at the rain curtain in a daze, thinking sadly that I must have committed a great sin to be punished so deeply The rain is getting heavier and heavier, and there is no momentum to decrease at all, I said to Qi Ao: "You kill me."

Now I'm just a shell, and I'm bent on dying and being freed

He just said one sentence that brought tears to my eyes: "You still have me"

Li Xuan said the same thing, but he still lost me, lost our love, Qi Ao didn't understand, but love was reluctant, it's not that he didn't do enough, it wasn't good enough, it's just that I didn't love him

His persistence is as always: "The master's death is not your fault, you don't take everything on yourself."

His voice was very hoarse, and he didn't feel good in his eyes when I looked like this, but I deceived myself and wanted to find an outlet in him: "If you don't kill me, then I'll kill you."

"Qin Xi," he called out to me in pain

My heart hurt so much that I looked at him with a sloppy gaze and said sadly: "If you hadn't insisted on bringing me to Qinzhou, I wouldn't have fallen into the situation I am in now I should have joined Li Xuan in Yancheng and continued to be my Princess Xuan and his wife, instead of being here Gu Ying self-pity and struggling to move forward."

"It's a fact that Li Xuan killed his master"

I said viciously: "Oh, how do I know that this is not a ploy you used to fight him You used a plan to kill Mrs. Yueyue in the first place What else can't be done Take me to the north of Qincheng to take a walk is fake It is true to use the flower of relief to attract my attention and plot to pierce my true identity Qi Ao, you are so despicable "

"Growing up, I haven't ever fooled you"

I barely supported my upper body, I didn't know where I got the strength to push Qi Ao away, and roared with all my might: "Don't say it, I don't want to hear a word, how much do you think you are nobler than him, you liar, you hide your identity from me in the palace, and you still keep silent about me when you arrive in Qinzhou, if you don't go to the Yuelai Inn, I don't know when I will be hidden from you."

I pointed at his nose and scolded angrily: "If you are really good for me, why didn't you tell me the truth when you met me in the capital, why did you appear in front of me, you should be your city lord in Qinzhou, why did you come to provoke me?"

Qi Ao hugged me with guilt in his eyes and tied my whole body to death The man has tears and doesn't flick His tears rolled down and slipped into my collar The voice was extremely hoarse and said: "I'm sorry Qin Xi, it's all my fault I shouldn't have let you stay with him after finding you Blame me for not taking you away Even if you don't want to, I should take you away from him I thought you would be happier by his side I saw the look in your eyes that night I knew No matter how much I persecuted you, you would rather die than agree to go with me."

Qi Ao's words made me even more uncomfortable I cried fiercely I cried like crazy I cried heartbreakingly Tears couldn't stop flowing down As if I wanted to drain all the water out of my body Why did my life change beyond recognition overnight Why did I suddenly become nothing

After that rainy afternoon, I really had a serious illness and couldn't wake up The doctor said that I was infected with a severe wind chill The cold entered the body and injured the root I was in bed for more than half a month and was lifeless Qi Ao came over every day to feed me medicine Spoonful after spoonful was extra careful I have been in a daze Sometimes I wake up and sometimes fall asleep I see that he is very anxious He can't wait to be sick It is he himself who hates to bear this torment for me

In fact, after I knew Qi Ao's identity, I could feel that he was sincerely good to me, and taking care of me had long become a habit for him, integrated into his blood, and it was as natural for him as eating and drinking, but I couldn't pass my own level, I couldn't just accept his kindness to me with such peace of mind, not so much that I blamed him, but that I felt guilty about him, I couldn't face him, and I couldn't face my father who died because of me

Only I know that I don't want to wake up and face sudden changes, and I'm running away

My condition deteriorated violently on the tenth day I woke up in pain suddenly after spitting out a mouthful of blood in my throat I lay weakly on the side of the bed and panted out This scene happened to fall in the eyes of Qi Ao who stepped into the door The wind rushed under his feet His eyes were red I couldn't hear his voice calling me urgently In the fog, I only heard Dugu Hao disdainfully said: "With her current situation, only by taking the worry can you solve the worry of her life Qi Ao, this is her life, when do you want to help her escape until "

"She shouldn't be treated like this, I was wrong three years ago, how could I be so confused that I left her and handed her over to Li Xuan, forced her into despair, and ended my life with forgetfulness, I will never forgive myself."