The day I woke up to was like an inexplicable night.

The subconscious wandered in the void in a white and sometimes black oppressive space for no longer than I know, and I was never able to reach the other side of the subconscious. Am I really dead? But why do I still have memories, those people still appear in my mind from time to time, everything that was once echoed in my mind more than once.

"Daddy." A childish angelic voice surrounded my ears.

I slowly opened my eyes, but why I couldn't see anything, the shadow in front of me was always covered by the gray patch, time and space seemed to be gone, am I dead? Is this the world after death?

"Well, it's Daddy, he's just asleep." A slightly hoarse voice.

"Daddy, get up." How can the voices of angels be a little noisy, are all angels children?

"Let him sleep a little more, let's go out and play."

I could only faintly hear the conversation around me, and once again I went back to the endless darkness, maybe I was really dead, unconscious, and I fell asleep again.

I don't know how long later, the familiar sound of heaven echoed in the darkness again, "Dad, wake up." ”

Gradually, the immature sound of heaven seemed to become a beam of light in the vast darkness, and the endless darkness seemed to be split by a bolt of lightning, and everything had a little light.

"Grandma, why does Daddy keep sleeping? The fathers of the other children are playing with them. "The voice of the young angel is bright and crisp.

"Dad is too tired and needs to rest, he will wake up after a while, definitely~" like a familiar voice of his mother, "Let's go home first, grandma will make you something to eat at night." ”

I don't quite understand, and my consciousness has always been vague, why is there no light in this world? If it is already an afterlife, am I waiting for the day of birth?

There is no consciousness, and only fragments of memories remain in the mind. The sweet moment with Xinrui was so short that I didn't even have time to say goodbye to her. And what about my mother, who is living alone now? Did Liu Yi and Kang Jianhu escape from the dead rainforest in the end?

Occasionally in my sleep, I can feel a small hand grasping my index finger and shaking it gently, I want to hold it, but how can there be feedback from the movements in my sleep. If I did die, what would I be like in the afterlife, what kind of family would I meet, and would I still have a little memory of the past?

Plunged into deep darkness again, I felt like I was in the rainforest again, alone, camouflage, the rainforest was like my shadow, I was the leaves scattered randomly in the rainforest.

There was a glimmer of light in the darkness, and the light of the morning sun shone through the forest, casting speckled reflections, so peaceful and quiet, that I could not imagine that I had once escaped from death in this sacred place in the woods, and that I myself was only a warrior who had fled with a gun.

There was a rustling sound between the dense rainforest and the shadows of the trees, and I looked left and right in a panic, who was it?

A man in a suit and sunglasses loomed in the reflection under the tree, and the silenced pistol in his hand was slowly raised. Instead of looking at me, he slowly pointed his gun at the rustling footsteps, a little girl strolling through the woods.

Seeing that another life was about to fall, a roar finally burst out of my suppressed throat, "No!! ”

My consciousness broke through the dream and pulled back to reality, and I tried to slowly open my eyes, and there was a dizzy white light in front of me, as if I had been outside the world, and the dazzling light made it difficult for my eyes that had been filled with darkness for a long time to adjust. Lying on my back, barely able to move, I could only let my consciousness gradually regain my senses, and slowly the contours around me finally took shape.

A chandelier hung from the blank ceiling, and a hinged window on the left hand side was open, allowing sunlight to shine through the gaps in the green leaves and just shone on the sheets that covered my body.

"Dad? Woke up. A little girl grabbed my right index finger, "Grandma! ”

The shouting made my ears ring, I hadn't heard a voice in a long time, and the little girl's shouting was really high-pitched.

While I was still in a state of confusion, a familiar figure walked in outside the door on my right, followed by a medical staff in a white robe.

"Zhuang Yan? Are you awake? I was surprised and a little delighted.

Mother? My throat felt like it was frozen, and I couldn't even spit out a word. I finally saw the familiar outline, my mother.

It turns out that I am not dead yet.

"Grandma, wow, that's great, Daddy is finally awake, Daddy can play with me when he wakes up." The little girl next to me turned to look at my mother.

"You come over first and let the doctor see how Dad's illness is." My mother pulled the little girl away, and her little hands holding my index finger pulled desperately, and it hurt a little.

My consciousness was still blurry, everything around me seemed to have a hazy layer of sand, and a man in a white coat dangled beside me.

"I finally woke up, it seems that there is no big problem, but I still need to recuperate and observe, after all, I have been in a coma for too long." An unfamiliar voice whispered something next to me.

"It's good to be awake, it's good to be awake." The mother muttered with tears of relief in her words.

After another moment, "I..." barely managed to squeeze out a word.

"Daddy, Daddy is talking!" The little girl cheered beside the bed where I was lying.

"Shhhh Be quiet, Zhuang Yan, you just woke up, don't be in a hurry to speak first. The mother's voice was gentle and loving, and some gray hair was added to her temples, but it was still the same stubborn as before.

"Mom—" I could still only spit out one word.

Everything after waking up is so familiar and unfamiliar, the familiar air, the familiar body, and the familiar mother, everything else is unfamiliar. Where am I? How long have I been asleep? What's going on? Where's Xinrui? Where are my brothers? Who is the little girl next to her?

No matter how many questions I had, I still couldn't ask a word, and my body was like a puddle of mud that I couldn't exert my strength at all, and gradually I fell asleep again.

A few days later, I seemed to fall asleep again, but I was able to wake up briefly, but every time I woke up, I still couldn't ask anything except a word, and the doubts in my heart could only be answered for the time being. After a few days, my body gradually recovered, and my mother was able to push me out of the hospital room in a wheelchair and go to the back garden of the hospital to bask in the sun. A lot of things from the past gradually came to the surface, but they all came from my mother's mouth.

More than three years have passed since I was seriously wounded and unconscious, and the anti-narcotics assault in the village deep in the rainforest was a perfect success, with only minor injuries to all but six people under my own leadership. Six of the people we had planned to be on alert were ambushed and attacked by unknown gangsters, three were killed on the spot, two were missing, and one of me was seriously injured and unconscious.

When the operation ended, the command headquarters was unable to contact us, and the entire company searched for nearly half a day and finally found the seriously injured and unconscious me in the depths of the rainforest, and the remains of the other three sacrifices, Liu Yi and Kang Jianhu's bodies were not found.

I was shot twice, one in the shoulder and the other failed to penetrate my forehead due to the distance and the protection of my helmet, but the impact was still fatal, and I was rescued and was dying. After continuous rescue, my life was finally saved, but I fell into a severe coma.

Hearing such bad news made me cough unstoppable, and I wanted to ask a lot of questions, but I couldn't say a word. I only silently read their names in my heart, "Old Jiang, Fox, Six Sons, Tiger... And my brother Liu Yi, who I played with since I was a child..."

Over and over again, I can't forget it, I can't turn it over.

Sitting in a wheelchair, unable to move my limbs for too long, I slowly raised my head and watched the sunlight cast a few spots of light through the gaps in the leaves, and time quietly disappeared for more than three years without me realizing it. I stared blankly at the fountain in the hospital, and suddenly reacted, "Where's Xinrui?" What happened to her? "Why hasn't she been there since I woke up? What about what we have agreed to never leave? Even if time has changed, at least we should see each other, right?

The mother was thoughtful, as if she had a hidden secret, but in order to cover up, she quickly changed the topic, "You're okay and you'll be discharged from the hospital, and I'll pick up Jingjing from school later, let's go back first." ”

"Jingjing?" I was surprised.

"You and Xinrui's daughter."

It's like a thunderbolt from the blue, my child and Xinrui? I'm already a father? But...

Before I could speak again, my mother hurriedly ended the conversation with me, "Let's go, you need to take medicine when you go back to the ward, you need to rest more and recover slowly." ”

"No, tell me first, what the hell happened?"

But no matter how much I asked, my mother just kept prevaricating, and there was no follow-up.

In the months that followed, my mother would occasionally bring Zhuang Jing to visit me after work, and I couldn't help but ask my mother about Xinrui, but she was always reluctant to answer directly. I have just woken up from a serious injury and I can't leave the hospital, and whether there will be any sequelae of brain trauma still needs to be thoroughly diagnosed. My mother and nurse didn't mention anything that happened in the past, the reason was that I could recuperate with peace of mind and talk about the past after I recovered and was discharged from the hospital.

Finally, before I was discharged from the hospital, I couldn't help but lose my temper and confronted my mother, but she still refused to tell me the truth.

What was the accident of that operation in the rainforest? What happened to Xinrui in the past? How is she now? My heart is full of doubts but no one cares, more than three years like this, slipping through my fingers with a flick of my fingers, and before I know it...

I was sitting in a daze on the hospital bed, watching the branches swaying gently outside the window, and the autumn breeze seemed to be about to fall asleep again. Brushing shoulders with death, is it a fluke or a fate to think about it at this time? Everyone around me seems to be gone, and I'm the only one left.

Just as he was thinking about it, he didn't notice a familiar face standing at the door of the ward-Company Commander Xu, "Zhuang Yan!" A powerful knock and a familiar shout reached my ears.

"Company commander? Company Commander Xu! I couldn't stop being surprised and excited, and I got up and stepped forward. It's been so long to see the faces of the former troops again, and my heart is like a fire burning in the bleak wasteland.

"Are you alright?" Xu Yong walked in and held my hand tightly, and there was a tall man with a higher rank beside him, "This is the leader of the regiment headquarters who came to visit you, He Qun." ”