024. Joy and sorrow

Everyone listened quietly to her story, infected with her sadness.

How heartache and helplessness should a seven-year-old child feel when he sees his loved one die in front of him? What kind of self-blame and regret should I have when I saw that what I did with good intentions turned into a tragic thing in the end? After so many years, she is still blaming herself for this sadness, she still can't see it, she still can't figure it out, and she still can't get rid of it.

"Qing'er, don't blame yourself! No one blames you. Yinxiang turned around and helped Qing'er stand up, grabbed her shoulder and arm and said, "This is their choice, maybe the best choice." Qing'er, don't blame yourself again, okay? "Seven years ago, the master received her letter and left after the news was nothing, in recent years he has sent people to inquire about the whereabouts of the master many times, but to no avail, he only knows that the letter is written by the Hu family, I didn't expect to get along with her for so long, today I know the whereabouts of the master, only to understand that the Hu family blocked the news, the Hu family buried the master and uncle here just don't want people to disturb them.

"Qing'er, they are adults, this is their own decision and it has nothing to do with you, don't blame yourself anymore." Yin'er comforted her loudly, such a Qing'er made people feel distressed to watch, and she never knew that there were so many sad things hidden in her heart.

"Qing'er, there is a problem between them, this is the solution, although it is not the best, but it is the least burdensome, since it is their choice, you can accept it. Stop blaming yourself, okay? Well? Yin Yu whispered comfort before approaching, she could understand her pain, knowing that she didn't have a mother, she must have such an attachment to this master as she did to her mother, she had experienced the pain of losing her mother twice!

"Qing'er, let him pass in the past, the dead are gone, forget him and make himself happy, there is no need to blame yourself. It's not your fault! There was a touch of sympathy and realization in Yinxi's eyes.

The master who pierced the sword into his body was absolutely poignant, and said to his uncle: "Brother Song, since it is painful to be Confucian and forgetful, it is better to look forward to the next life and eternity." ”

Uncle Shi said: "Rou'er, in this life, we were born in the same year, the same month, and the same day, so we will die on the same day and month in the same year, you choose to give up your life, and my brother will accompany you." In the next life, I must be born before you, be your husband and take good care of you! Take care of you for the rest of your life! I won't let you suffer like this in this world again! ”

She threw herself in front of her master, crying and plugging the bloody hole with her hands. The master smiled at her and said, "Don't cry, the master is reborn, it is liberation, and the master is very happy!" Qing'er, promise the master that you will be happy in the future! Be happy! ”

"Qing'er, cry out! It's more comfortable to cry. Rong Yu stretched out his arms and gently hugged Qing'er in his arms and patted her back.

Qing'er shook her head in Rong Yu's arms: "I promised the master not to cry, so I can't cry." If I do it, I will have no regrets and go with peace of mind, right? ”

Rong Yu whispered: "Qing'er, Grandpa Qin has not returned from the Cao Gang at the moment, you can't have any more problems." Your master is very relieved that she is leaving, and if you stop blaming yourself, she will be more at ease, you know? When she vomited blood and passed out on the body of her master, she almost scared her grandparents and Grandpa Qin to death, and she only woke up after three people took care of her for a month.

"Hmm!" Nodding weakly, but still without tears.

When she woke up more than a month later, she was very relieved to learn that her grandfather buried her master and uncle in the bamboo forest, and the bamboo forest was the master's favorite place, and she wrote the inscription herself, but her grandfather forbade her to come to the bamboo forest. Later, she came in to accompany the master without telling her grandfather, but her grandfather didn't say anything, but every time he let the wind and snow accompany her, and gave her the true anger, otherwise I really don't know if she can walk out of the bamboo forest by herself.

Rong Yu glanced at Uncle Ren, and Uncle Ren stepped forward and said, "Young Master, the Cao Gang replied that Mrs. Xue is only afraid that she will give birth in the next day or two." ”

"Huh? Is it a day or two? Qing'er raised her head and looked at Uncle Ren and asked in a hoarse voice.

"Yes." Ren Bo looked at him worriedly, but don't have any more accidents.

"Are the Cao Gang ready? Is there anything else you need? Tell Ning'er and Su'er to wait by Sister Lan's side, don't go out of the situation, I'll go over later. "Although the body is exhausted, his mind has returned to normal, and he has regained his calm and sanity. Everyone was secretly relieved, and finally diverted her attention.

"The midwife Wenpo invited eight from the city to send them over according to the instructions of the young master, and there is a Qin doctor to fight, nothing should happen, although the young master is relieved that there is no need to rush over. Until the masters have not eaten at the moment, the young master ...... look at it. Ren Bo looked at Shang Rongyu with appreciation, they were both people who knew Hu Qing. It is expected that if it is only herself, she will not be able to eat, and at this moment, these princes are here, and she will never let the guests accompany her to go hungry.

Sure enough, Qing'er smiled bitterly and said, "Let's set the meal, how dare you be hungry, I am hungry too!" ”

I walked out of the bamboo forest first and didn't look back. Everyone knew that she was just hiding the pain, and she was still blaming herself. She still doesn't understand what love between men and women is like, she doesn't know how to 'let go', and she doesn't understand that love can make people 'live and die'.

Yinxiang touched the tombstone with both hands: Master, I didn't expect that seven years ago, a farewell would be an eternal separation between heaven and man, and the disciple was unfilial and did not send you on the last journey. Master, you and Uncle Shi would never have expected Qing'er to blame herself for you all these years, Qing'er, she is so pitiful. Don't worry, in the future, I will take care of her.

Yinxi looked at Qing'er, whose clothes were not dusty in front of her and her back was thin, and somehow a trace of sadness floated in her heart, Qing'er still didn't understand the feelings between men and women, after this incident, she was afraid that it would have a negative impact on her in the future. Today's events are indeed shocking, not only for the feelings of the two people in the tomb, but also for Qing'er's experience, how painful she should be when she faces the trauma in her heart again today! Seeing her just now, she even felt distressed for herself! He said softly: "Return, there will be no wind and rain and no sunshine!" There is no love and no resentment! Seeing that Qing'er paused slightly and continued to move forward, he sighed in his heart, let's let time dilute everything. Although Qing'er is soft but not fragile, although she is a woman, she has a man's self-improvement personality, she will get better!

Yin Yu looked at Qing'er's back, and really hoped that he could walk side by side with her at this moment and share her pain; I really wish I had the ability to keep her away from pain and be happy forever; I wish I wasn't as helpless and powerless as I am now; I wish I could do something for her!

***

Before the dawn stained the screen, Qing'er came to the Cao Gang.

Xue Yun was boxing in front of the hall, he heard the sound of horses' hooves from far and near, and stood still to see that it was Qing'er and his party, and when the horse came closer, he saw that behind Qing'er were eight, ninth, tenth, thirteenth elder brothers and Rong Yu, and after being slightly stunned, he stepped forward to salute.

"Xue Yun has seen all the elder brothers. Brother Yu! ”

"Congratulations! Congratulations to Brother Xue for making Amma! Several people gave Xue Yun a blessing.

I haven't seen him for a few months, Xue Yunhei has lost some weight, and it is really hard to come to be a helper.

"I'll go to see Sister Lan and the baby first." Leaving the men who were greeting, Qing'er ran into the back hall.

"Shhhh Be quiet! Sister Lan slept? Has Grandpa Qin shown Sister Lan? Did you say anything? Sister Lan is okay, right? As soon as Qing'er Fu entered the door, he waved his hand to Ning Ke and Su'er, and said softly while slowing down his pace to approach the bed, lifting the bed tent and looking into the bed, Xu was tired after giving birth, Shen Lan fell asleep groggily, but there was a smile on her pale face.

Looking at this scene, Qing'er was stunned: Is every mother after giving birth so satisfied? Was Eniang so satisfied when she gave birth to herself? So even if she loses her own life, she must be born safely? Putting down the bed tent in a daze, the person was already frozen.

"Young master, are you alright?" Ning'er helped her sit down.

"It's okay! What about Grandpa Qin? Qing'er came back to her senses, shook her head and whispered.

"Doctor Qin has checked Mrs. Xue's pulse, and now she is resting in the wing. Young master, I'll accompany you to see the little boy! He's funny with his little hands and feet. Ning Er said with a low smile to Hu Qing. She and Su'er waited by Shen Lan's side on Qing'er's order, and gave her her true qi when Shen Lan's strength was not enough, so the two of them saw the baby for the first time, and they saw Xue Yun who was waiting anxiously outside the door, and they were a little excited.

Looking at their tired appearance, Qing'er whispered with relief: "Thank you for your hard work, tired, take me to see the baby first, and then you can go and rest." ”

"Yes!" The two led Hu Qing out to the next room and led Qing'er to the crib.

Qing'er leaned down, and the pink and tender mass of flesh in front of her eyes, and her complexion was almost transparent and white. With his eyes closed, his small mouth slightly open, his small nose moving, his face slightly red, and his head had long fetal hairs. The small arms and legs are tied with cloth straps and wrapped in the quilt. Looking at this new life, Qing'er was full of novelty, lifted the corner of the quilt, took out his little hand, and saw that his fists were clenched tightly. stroked his little hand with his little finger, and was immediately held by him unconsciously, Qing'er's smile quickly climbed up the corner of his cheek and mouth: "Ah! He's so cute! ”

"That's right, it's so cute, and when I was born, I still looked at the two of us and smiled!" Su'er couldn't help but say that at this moment she was still excited and excited.

"Now the Cao Gang's civil strife has just subsided, and it is not very stable. I want to leave you in the Cao Gang, firstly, to protect Sister Lan and the little boy, and secondly, to help Sister Lan take care of the little boy. Do you have any comments? Qing'er waved away the nurse and said to Ning'er Su'er.

Looking at the little life in front of me, my heart is full of joy and touch, such a pure, soft and weak little person, it is not easy to grow up, and after growing up, I have to face countless difficulties and crises, what I can do for him is really limited, just do my best.

Ning Er and Su Er heard the young master say this, they didn't understand for a while, they looked at each other, and then looked at the young master inexplicably.

"It doesn't matter if you don't want to, what I want is your willingness, and only if you are willing, I can also rest assured that Sister Lan and the baby will be handed over to you, do you understand what I mean? If you don't want to, just say it, and I won't blame you. You have been with me for a few years, and you are the most reassuring person for me. Looking at Ning'er and Su'er, Qing'er said seriously.

"Young Master, we are willing to stay and take care of Mrs. Xue and the little prince." The two glanced at each other and knelt down in front of Qing'er, and said resolutely, maybe it was because they watched the baby be born, so the two had an indescribable closeness to him.

"That's good! Although you are in the Cao Gang, you have to abide by not only the gang rules of the Cao Gang but also the family laws of the Hu family, if you do something that is not good for the Cao Gang, then you will not be able to live in the Hu family, even if the eldest brother Sister Lan does not punish you, you know my temperament, and I will not be soft. You also know what the first article of the Hu family's family law is, so I don't need to say more. ”

"Yes, please rest assured, we know."

"Okay, you will stay in the Cao Gang in the future, I will send someone to you every month to send your salary, you are still from my Hu family, don't embarrass me, ah!" Hu Qing stretched out his hand to help the two up.

"Yes, young master. We will do our best to protect the little boy and Mrs. Xue, take care of the little boy, and will not embarrass the young master. ”

"Good! Go and rest. Qing'er nodded. Ning'er Su'er pushed the door out.

"Sure enough, it's a good way to govern the family!" With the words, several elder brothers, Xue Yun and Rong Yu pushed the door in.