"I ...... Very good. You...... Are you okay? ”

After five long minutes, he finally said two short sentences.

This phone call made me finally realize that Yan Xu was so distant and unfamiliar. I could recognize the voice at once, but the others seemed to be far away, far away.

"It's good to be nice, it's good to be nice." If it were left in normal times, I would have laughed at him, and your tone is clearly like an old monk chanting scriptures.

But now, I don't just can't laugh out loud. My eyes were misty, and my throat was sour, and I couldn't speak.

"Yan Xu......"

"Meco......"

They said each other's names together, and then they were silent again. It turns out that I don't know when it began, and we have long since lost the intimacy of calling nicknames.

"You ......"

"You talk about ...... first"

"I ......"

I couldn't hold back after all, and I cried out. The rest of the words were also choked in his throat, and he couldn't say a word anymore.

"Meko, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Hearing me crying, Yan Xu was obviously a little panicked, and he kept saying sorry on the other end of the phone. And I, crying harder and harder.

"I'm sorry, Meco, I can't go to school in Beijing with you. I...... I still didn't get to Beijing. It's me who's so bad, it's me who's letting you down. ”

After all, I waited for this sentence. What I thought to myself was, I don't want to hear anything I'm sorry from you. I'm afraid the three words I'm sorry are the most hated words in the world, what can I do if I'm sorry? Didn't the Daoming Temple in the Meteor Garden say it? Apologies are useful, but why do you want the police?

I'm sorry, can you explain why you didn't say goodbye?

I'm sorry, can you erase the past between us?

I'm sorry, can I heal the wounds in my heart?

I'm sorry, can I relieve the pain I once had?

I'm sorry, can I say goodbye?

Although I thought so in my heart, in the face of such Yan Xu, I still couldn't say a word of cruelty, I just felt so distressed.

"No, it's okay, it's okay if you can't study in one city."

"Merco, you...... Be good. It's me who is bad, I'm not good enough. In the future, I may not be able to accompany you well. ”

"It's okay, it's okay, it's okay if it's not Beijing, you can't accompany me, and it's ...... Never mind. We're all good to go. ”

I said duplicitously that it didn't matter. Actually, I'm really related, so long without saying goodbye. There wasn't even a word of surprise, and from beginning to end, all he called was polite. It's the kind of polite words that are like mountains and seas.

Although he was a little flustered when he said this, I could feel that his purpose was obvious.

"You...... If you don't come to Beijing, where will you end up? ”

"Nanjing."

In fact, as early as a few days ago, I had already received a message from Chen Yang that Yan Xu had been admitted to Nanjing University.

As long as he gives up Beijing, he can still choose other good schools.

If it were me, I wouldn't fight with my life anymore, and sometimes, giving up is to give myself more opportunities. However, I still want to ask, I want to hear Yan Xu tell me in person.

However, his faint sentence of Nanjing seemed to tie a dead knot in our dialogue.

"Nanjing is good, Nanjing is the same as Beijing, Nanjing is the ancient capital of the Six Dynasties. Oh, by the way, there are also the famous Jinling Twelve Hairpins in Nanjing, and you can probably meet a lot of beautiful girls in the south when you go. ”

I finally tried to adjust my crying state, held back the tears in the back, and pretended that I was indifferent.

However, there was still silence on the other side.

Actually, I really want to end this phone call without "nutrition" as soon as possible.

Actually, what I would love to say is that without you, I have a lot of connections. If you come now, it's useless to say anything, you hurt me like this, how can I forgive you.

However, these words cannot be opened after all.

Actually, what can I do?

This phone call, stumbling and intermittent, we are no longer what we once were.

And he, from the moment he opened his mouth, came to say goodbye, that is, to say goodbye, it seems that he will never see each other again, and the two do not owe each other.

In the past, we were intimate, but in the blink of an eye, it seemed to be separated by thousands of mountains and rivers.

I was ready for a breakup.

And today's phone call can only be said to be a ceremony.

"Then, you have to promise me, it will be fine."

"Don't worry, of course, I'll be fine."

"Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

Put down your phone. The past is flooding back.

I thought I was relieved, I thought I had forgotten, I thought I had come out.

However, the scenes still echo so clearly in my mind and linger.

I still clearly remember the first time I met Yan Xu, in the narrow corridor of the teaching building, you were the best-looking boy in the next class. With a good-looking smile, white teeth, flashing eyes, a long back, warm hands, and a warm embrace, the memories are still so clear, so clear.

You've leaned against the wall of the hallway like that, smiling at me with the best smile in the world. What I was left for was a smile for me. The smile that lingers in my dreams again and again.

Now, I'm left alone, how can I say goodbye to the past?