Chapter 10: He's Not "Him"

Although Yang Wei and I crossed the campus all the way to the opposite Polytechnic University that day, the rest of the story was very calm, not as I imagined over and over again, worried that something would happen, but I didn't know how to face it.

Yang Wei watched the drama silently and seriously throughout the whole process, and would comment on a few sentences from time to time, but unfortunately, this was the first time in my life that I watched a drama in the theater, and I almost didn't understand what he said.

However, it was as if he was talking to me, and it was like he was talking to himself. Because I didn't respond to him, he didn't ask.

I also tried very hard to watch the drama the whole time, but when the end came out, I only remembered a few words in my mind, but it was like a knife into my heart.

It's a wonderful plot.

"You are the wind that leaves no trace

You are the wind that sweeps through my body

You are the wind that does not show its whereabouts

You are the wind everywhere. ”

These words always remind me of a certain figure, a figure with the same good-looking smile as Yang Wei. And he's like my ubiquitous wind.

"If you forget her, you don't have to endure it anymore, and if you forget her, you don't have to suffer anymore. Forget what you don't have, forget what you lose and can't get later.

Like a rhinoceros forgetting the grassland, like a waterfowl forgetting the lake, like a man in hell forgetting heaven...... Forgetting is the only thing the average person can do. But I decided not to forget her. ”

Yes, choosing to forget is a relief for myself, but I can't forget him.

The course of each story in life may be very different, but there are always some endings that are strikingly similar.

I love him, but he loves her.

In real life, although there is no dramatic ending like a drama, the process can have the same ups and downs, and maybe it will be more sadistic.

On the way back, I was still in a fugue, and my mind was full of words from the drama.

When I went back, Yang Wei didn't continue to show off his bicycle in a hurry, but obediently pushed it and walked with me.

The two of them didn't speak for a long time, and they didn't even look at each other walking side by side.

"It's so hard to watch the drama." I suddenly came up with this sentence, only to find that my throat was uncomfortably dry.

"You think so, too?" Yang Wei turned his head to look at me, "Yes, that's right, it's very hard." He loved her, but she loved him. ”

He looked at me and smiled. This time, I noticed that his hair was not covering his eyes.

I noticed that he also had the white teeth that I liked, and his eyes were bright when he smiled. And for the first time, I looked so clearly and so closely into his smiling eyes.

There's a place deep inside me that seems to tell me, really, probably something's going on.

"Take you to a place where people can relax, okay?" The first time Yang Wei spoke to me, he brought the word "inquiry", but his tone was still commanding.

Without waiting for me to answer, he put down his bike, pulled me by the way, and walked firmly in one direction.

While I was still babbling all the way and worried that it would be dangerous for him to throw such an expensive bicycle so casually, I found that he was in a hurry and actually took me to the playground of the Polytechnic Institute.

Actually, I've heard for a long time that the playground at the Polytechnic Institute is much bigger than our F. The night view has even been selected as the best date spot for a relationship in a campus forum.

Oh my God, what the hell is wrong with me? Why do you always have the word "love" in your head? It's all strange that Weiwei always gives me a little bit of mandarin duck scores.

However, at this moment, the playground at night is not as lively as during the day, but it gives people a sense of paradise.

The lawn of the playground is quiet, the starry sky of the playground is quiet, and the snow-white goal is quiet.

Even the whispering students sitting in the stands were quiet.

The messy thoughts, or all the messy thoughts, were suddenly swallowed up by the empty silence.

When it was time to speak or when I felt it was time to speak, Yang Wei always suddenly chose to be silent.

Just like now. In the afternoon, the domineering president, Yang Wei, the tyrant prince, suddenly disappeared, and in the night, it seemed to be a different person.

The two of us walked silently on the runway, side by side, but there were no words.

But fortunately, I didn't feel embarrassed, I thought that it would be good like this, there was no need to speak, just knowing that there was one person around, we were not lonely, it was enough.

Just know he's in a certain place

There is such a person

We sat together

Watch a movie

even though

We even have a shadow of each other

I can't see clearly

But

I know there is such a person

Just know he's in a certain place

There is such a person

We walked together

Look at the night sky

even though

We don't have a word

But I know of such a person

There is always such a person

There was a feeling of emotion in my heart.

Thinking, let's just keep walking and walking.

It wasn't until we found that the stars and the moon were tired that the two of us stopped and started walking in the opposite direction along the way we came.

Until I woke up the next morning, I crawled into my bed and asked me what happened to me and the male god last night. I can't even remember what I said to Yang Wei, or if I really didn't say anything.

I just told the story of the bicycle, she screamed, and when it came to the silence after the play, she refused to believe it, thinking that I must have hidden some ulterior secret.

Is it a secret? Maybe there really is, it's the kind of tacit understanding that accompanies each other and everything is unspoken.

"Love at first sight is not hidden, two hearts are not lonely, I will stay where there is you in three lives and three lives, I really like to be able to rely on you, let yourself no longer hide, close to your heart on every windy night, make everything simple." Lan Xinmei's song sounded inexplicably from the bottom of my heart.

For a long time later, I didn't know what role Yang Wei played in my life, but from that day on, I had someone to accompany when I was lonely, someone to share with when I was happy, and someone to bless during the festival.

Not only did I get used to the silence of the two of us alone, but I also got used to his self-determination when he was sick, and for the first time I realized that I was so easy-going and docile.

The rehearsals for the drama also went smoothly day by day on such days.

I often go to the rehearsal room to watch them rehearse silently, watch the stories I write myself, and watch the scenes I have experienced recreate little by little.

Yang Wei plays Yan Xu in the script, and he will become very involved as soon as he comes on stage. And I was surprised to find that many of his expressions were familiar.

I was surprised that he could play "him" so similarly, like sometimes I suddenly had an illusion, as if it was not Yang Wei but Yan Xu standing in front of me. It was Yan Xu who had no news.

Many times I tried to tell myself that Yang Wei was Yang Wei, but that chaotic illusion still appeared again and again. So much so that after occasionally watching the rehearsal, I often have tears in my eyes.

Maybe it's time to take responsibility for your feelings, after all, the once ignorant youth is gone. I shouldn't let Yang Wei live in Yan Xu's shadow all the time, he is Yang Wei and not Yan Xu. Moreover, he likes to dominate the plot more than Yan Xu.

And I wrote "One-man Show", which was just a script.

When it was calm, I also thought about it carefully, and felt that I didn't understand Yang Wei very well, no matter how long we were together, I wouldn't know what he was going to do next. In which direction will the script between the two of us go, and whether I should play Tease or Lady in the next second.

I only know that he is a very romantic and beautiful person, really like those male protagonists who live in TV dramas. Handsome, sunny, domineering, smart, and sensitive.

That's all I know. And knowing this is enough to make me retreat in front of the relationship between us. I guess we're just good friends to be friends.

In my life dictionary, in order to protect what I want to protect, I will choose to give up all risks in exchange for the possibility of more hope.

Because I'm afraid of being hurt.

In all my memories, Yang Wei seems to be unable to connect with life. He has always been illusory, romantic, and perfect. It's like a fictional character in a novel I've ever written. And emotional things can't be fictional, let alone deceive themselves.

I know the gap between us – I've always considered myself a very sane person. However, my high-sounding sanity has no effect, and I can't guarantee what will happen between Yang Wei and me in the next second.