"How many ways are there to coax people?" Avi asked me solemnly.

"The most useful thing is nothing more than compromise." I am like an experienced elder who imparts my experience to Avi.

Xun An knew that I was trying to reconcile with him and not break up, so he rushed directly into the dormitory and pulled me away.

"I'm sorry."

"What do you mean?" I was frightened by my own thoughts, and knelt directly in front of Xun'an.

Looking at the face on the other side that is very similar to me. Who am I like but to be like him?

Conghan likes to find peace, but I haven't found it for six years.

I became very sensitive to my feelings, and I pretended to be nothing until I began to learn the truth. I tried to find the flaw in this truth, but the human eye can really betray himself, and he is completely betrayed by his own eye.

I recall the way he looked at Ann. Unlike when he looked at me, when he looked at Xun'an, his eyes shone with the same brilliance as those around him. It was so dazzling, but I didn't notice it. He pretended to unintentionally let me take him with him to see Xun'an practice dancing, but I didn't find out so many times. When he was with me, he would always greet Xun An and ask him where he was doing, but I didn't find out. He was more attentive than me when he prepared gifts for Xun'an, but I didn't notice it. He studied medicine to treat my eldest brother, and at the same time, my eldest brother was also the eldest brother of Xun'an, but I didn't find out...... He's not a master of secretion, but I didn't find out. It's that I'm too blind in love, I realize.

But I'm still comforting myself, maybe there's something in Xun'an that he doesn't have, he just appreciates. Or maybe it was just the refraction of the light on Xun'an's body in his eyes, he was just a mirror.

I took Xun'an with me on a date. He had already clearly stated his mind to Xun'an, and when he saw Xun'an again, his expression was mixed. I finally found out. Before the strategy that had been discussed before it was implemented, I was sure that there was no doubt that Xun'an's words were true, and there was no need to spend any more time tempting.

"Let's break up!"

It was cloudy, but the buildings in the school were brighter than usual. I made an appointment with Conghan and announced this decision.

He smiled knowingly, as if he had expected all of this. But instead of answering immediately, he walked on his own. I followed behind, looking at the strange and familiar body in front of me, and my thoughts were filled with thoughts. Thinking back to his gentleness, my arm suddenly stiffened, as if a force was holding it tightly.

"I promise you." He replied nonchalantly.

"Looks like you already know." He finally stopped.

"I should have known." I speak more and more like Xun'an, not dragging mud or water.

Conghan sat on the edge of the flower bed, looking at his mutilated right hand with vacant eyes.

I sat on the side, but there were a few people in between.

"Can you tell me now why your hands are like this?"

"That's it, it's just a work injury." He tugged at the rhododendron in the flower bed.

"You know what? We've known each other for so many years, and you seem to be constantly changing and unpredictable. I smiled wryly.

"Really?"

"Sometimes, I forget why I'm in this world that doesn't need me?" He grabbed the branch with all his might, and threw it back into the flower bed.

"My hand was cut off by a machine while working...... "I recalled, bowing his head.

"I watched it detach from my body for only a few seconds." He touched the incision on his thumb, and after all this time, the incision had long since healed, but the new tissue was growing wildly, making it look ugly.

"Strangely, I didn't even feel pain, as if it didn't belong to me."

The aunts next to me were in a hurry. It was the first time I felt in the factory that someone cared about. There was an unfamiliar smile on his face.

"Annan, you know what?"

"You and Xun'an are my only friends. But I don't seem to know how to be content? "He looked at me, but I couldn't see his face.

"My appearance in this world was completely accidental. Maybe God got distracted and drew a random stroke in the book, and then there was one more me in the human world. Conghan sketched in front of his eyes with his hand, as if he was the god.

"Annan, you are really happy."

"I'm envious......" he deliberately dragged out his tone.

"Because of my family?" I didn't ask. The answer is obvious, and it may be a disservice to him to mention it.

"I envy you too."

"At least, you have someone you like."

But I could no longer find the one who would make me happy. Tears flowed imperceptibly, and I tasted their saltiness.

Get up from the cold and help me wipe away my tears.

I smiled, "Thank you." ”

Let's move on. He walked behind me, and I slowed down to try for him to follow. We walked into a camphor forest, stepping on the rustling of fallen leaves, but the dense green above our heads, as if we were in a space that does not distinguish the four seasons and cannot perceive the passage of time. We sat on a stone bench in the woods, where few people seemed to come, and moss grew on the bench, but we didn't care.

"You like to find peace, I can't help you."

I don't blame him, but he shouldn't lie to me and shouldn't think of approaching him in the way he was with me.

"But that's really the best way to do it." Conghan deliberately accentuated the word "best", as if I was playing an extremely important role in this matter.

"I don't understand ......"

"You'll understand later."

"I'm sorry, but this is an agreement I have with others. You don't want me to be a man who doesn't keep my word, do you? Conghan's eyes were very firm, and I knew that there was no need to continue to investigate.

"Can you tell me when you fell in love with him?" I try to understand this particular feeling, even if it is not acceptable to most people.

"When I first met him, I didn't dare to think about it." From the cold smiled shyly.

"At that time, he was surrounded by a large number of girls. He hid in my dorm room, but didn't say a word to me, and I remember the way he slammed the door shut. ”

"Haha......" It makes me a little amused to hear that.

"He didn't even introduce himself, and I only learned his name at the class meeting." He paused.

"He looks like me, and he doesn't want to be approached."

"Actually, we are completely different, he actively rejects others, and I am passive."

His smile faded.

"He's very different to one person, and that person is you. Later, I learned that the two of you are sisters and brothers...... I just think you're all too good, but at the same time, it makes me feel inferior. ”

"I never thought that it was possible for someone like me to be friends with you?"

It turns out that this is unattainable again.

"And then?"

"And then there was that military training, and I became your friend because I helped you rub your arm." I couldn't help but glance at his hand again, and I seemed to feel the tenderness of his ten fingers at that time.

"Because of you, Xun'an and I have also become friends."

From the cold eyes to gentle, "I really like him, it should be when I see him dancing, right?" "His gaze became far-reaching, and it took me back to that time.

"The first time I saw him dancing, I was very emotional. He was like a prince with a fairy aura, and from then on, I would dream of him dancing every night. ”

"Isn't the person who appears in the dream the person who is in his heart?"

"It's human nature to fall in love with someone, but because the object is him, I feel even more like an outlier." Conghan hugged his head tightly, as if in pain.

I hurriedly grabbed his hand with my hand and retracted it like an electric shock.

"Don't keep thinking about it, listen, you've never been an outlier!" I ordered him to take a break from his thoughts.

Gradually relax your hands from the cold.

"Likes are a beautiful thing, no matter who they are."

"You know what?" I tried to soften my voice to comfort him.

After a while, I finally recovered from the cold. A sudden gust of wind blew in the woods, causing a small part of the leaves to fall.

"I like him, but I can't tell him, I don't even dare to tell anyone."

"At that time, everyone thought that the person I liked was you, and you asked me if I wanted to be together because I couldn't resist everyone's rumors, right?"

"Yes." I'm ashamed.

"I'm afraid that if I don't admit that I like you, I'll lose not only your friend, but also the person I really like...... So, I can only lie to you. ”

"It's okay." I was helpless, but I had already guessed the cause.

"But actually...... No matter what I do, I can't be with him. ”

It was getting late, and it was getting darker in the woods.

"This severed finger is like my unfinished life. It's just a thing that you don't want, a person who you don't want. ”

"I'm such a poor person, living on memories every day."

"There's always something bright to bring you back to life." Words are too pale for me to comfort others by saying something, and I may not be able to do it with action. All I have left is a heart that wants him to get better and better.

"That's all for today."

I want to tell him that we will still be friends in the future, but how can the truth go back to the past?

"Don't be scruples." Actually, I was full of scruples.

We said goodbye again in the night.

As for liking, I have liked it, and liking is too simple a thing compared to love. I like Conghan, there is no doubt about that, I am angry at his deception, but in the end I have the greatest understanding of him. I even like the way he likes to find peace, this is a good young time, it belongs to the three of us, not just the love time between me and Conghan.

As for love, I haven't felt it yet. Leaving the cold has become easier for me, I don't have to spend time trying to guess him, I don't have to argue with him about trivial matters. Because we have never loved each other, love should be tolerant and honest. When you reach the age of talking about love, you will feel that love is a great thing, and at the same time, it is a small thing that you don't have to do any planning for it. People who are in love should enjoy the freedom and fearlessness of drifting on the calm sea.

As for desires, the soul of Conghan has been burned out by desires. He can't recognize himself, he wants to get it by all means, he feels that he is dispensable...... A person who lives only by memories is undoubtedly pitiful, but if he does not even have memories, he is not even qualified to be pitiful.

My desire was broken, but I didn't feel sorry for it, because it was wrong. At one point, I twisted myself and did whatever it took to achieve my ends, only to end up being eaten by the swamp...... Destruction was a great evil, but it was a great good thing for me at the time. It can only be rebuilt after it is broken, and the rebuilt personality tends to be stronger and more solid. Break those fancy imaginations, break those bad luck brought by self...... Only then can our souls be refilled with lamp oil. It is very difficult and tiring to live for a long time, and those winds that blow from nowhere will blow out the lamp of life at once.

The story about me and Conghan has come to an end like this. This was not my intention, I thought he would continue to be active in my story as a friend. As a result, good luck and bad luck often come unexpectedly.

Saying "goodbye" has two meanings, seeing each other again and "never seeing you again". When we say this word, our hearts often look forward to seeing each other again, and when it reaches each other's ears in the murky air, the result is never to see each other again. When I said goodbye to Conghan, it wasn't that I really didn't want to say goodbye to him. I just didn't expect it to be the last thing I said to him.

He left our lives without even saying "goodbye" without me knowing it. But there is always an expectation for him, and hope and his story are just to be continued.