The wages in the health centers are too low, and when the products are not sold, there is only a guaranteed salary. Ya was so worried that she quit her job. After all, her purpose is to earn more money to pay off her debts. Although her mother's family never mentioned the matter of repaying the debt, her parents even said to her: "If you have it, forget it if you don't." "Keya knows that it is not easy for her parents, although her father has a pension, it is only enough for him to see a doctor and buy medicine, and the various expenses of the family still need to be earned by her mother, and her mother is also old. The two old men still have to help Ya, the married daughter, build a house, how can Ya accept the help of her parents with peace of mind? How can you not pay it back?

Guilt always inadvertently torments Ya's heart, the sour taste spreads to the heart, it seems that there is always an invisible pressure on the top of Ya's head, and Ya feels that there is a blocking power in her breathing. She wanted to break free, she wanted to run across the field, to take a big breath of fresh air.

She is angry in Beijing. I didn't tell my husband in advance, but she said that when she asked her husband to buy gilts, she said: "If you don't make money by making shiitake mushrooms, then bring pigs and raise two gilts, and when you grow up, you don't sell the cubs, and you feed them and sell them." If you don't feed the pigs and only care about playing mahjong all day long, I will go to Beijing to work. The husband apparently didn't take her words to heart, and when the mother-in-law sold the two gilts as well, Ya was completely disappointed. She quit her job and didn't return home, so she took a bus directly to Beijing.

At that time, she acted with anger in her chest, but when she arrived in Beijing, she regretted the decision she had made in a hurry, but she was already in Beijing and could not easily turn back.

The longing for her daughter's bones tormented her. The one-and-a-half-year-old daughter has never left her and is still nursing. Husbands and parents-in-law rarely coax their daughters, they feel that they farm and make mushrooms, and it is elegant to coax children.

My daughter loves to cry very much, especially at night, when my daughter cries, Ya gets up to make milk powder and feed. Ya's milk is not enough for her daughter to eat, so she needs to be fed with milk powder. When her daughter was full, Ya walked back and forth with her arms, and gently patted her daughter with her hand, humming in her mouth: "Oh--oh--, little girl, sleep--".

The daughter fell asleep, and Masaya and his clothes lay down. But it didn't take long for her daughter to cry loudly again, and Ya had to get up and carry her back and forth. Finally put her daughter to sleep again, Ya just closed her eyes tiredly, her daughter cried again, and Ya had to get up again. Night after night passed like this, but no matter how her daughter cried, her husband fell asleep and turned a deaf ear to her daughter's crying, and her parents-in-law never asked.

Because my husband loves to play mahjong, my parents-in-law quarreled with him all day long, saying that they did all the work in the field, and my husband relied on them when he had children. In fact, the work in the field is mainly done by the husband, because when they eat in a pot, they think that they have done too much and suffered a loss. My father-in-law still goes to play mahjong every day, but when he quarrels with his husband, he is the first to go, as if he doesn't touch mahjong.

The husband hid out to play mahjong and was happy, but Ya couldn't bear to complain at home when her mother-in-law scolded Huai. When her daughter was a year old, she saw a pharmacy in town looking for a job, so she applied for it. The daughter is coaxed by her husband and mother-in-law during the day, and Ya gives her mother-in-law a few hundred yuan a month to coax the child. When her daughter was one and a half years old, Ya was very disappointed in her husband who was addicted to mahjong, and went to Beijing alone.

When I arrived in Beijing, it was better to be busy during the day, but in the dead of night, I was in the empty big bed, and there was no daughter's small warm body to snuggle up to, and Ya felt indescribably lonely in my heart. Being separated from her daughter is equivalent to being forcibly weaned. The daughter finds warmth and security by breastfeeding, and Ya strengthens the mother-daughter relationship by feeding her daughter.

But now? When her daughter cries again at night, who has the patience to coax her? I don't know how many slap prints will fall on my daughter's little buttocks? When I was at home, when my husband couldn't coax my daughter, he slapped her little ass a few times in annoyance, and my daughter cried in fright until she cried as if she was about to die. Like her grandparents, she usually doesn't coax her granddaughter, occasionally coaxes, and when she can't coax her, she also slaps and waits.

Ya regretted that she had arrived in Beijing, she didn't expect that she would be so uncomfortable after leaving her daughter! That bone-eating longing made her feel as if her body had been emptied, and her soul seemed to be gone. The daughter's ruddy little face always appears in front of her eyes, and there always seems to be a daughter's cry in her ears.

I think about my daughter, and I think so uncomfortable. The daughter has always relied on her mother, and now, she can never see her mother again, can no longer suck her mother's sweet milk, can no longer find her mother's warm embrace, what kind of panic and what kind of fear her little heart has to experience!

"Daughter, mom is sorry for you!" In the darkness of the night, Ya's tears poured out, wetting the pillow towel......

Ya now thinks of the health center, and she still has some regrets in her heart. Whenever she finished her lecture and there was a burst of applause in the hall, she was indescribably happy in her heart. The health center closes at 5:00 p.m., and after work, they usually do a half-hour physiotherapy session. This is the first month near the water, and those old people have to get up early in the morning to line up for their turn to do physiotherapy. They don't have to take turns, they can do all the instruments in it.

You don't see, those old people who often come for health care, many of them are full of energy, gray hair turns black, and their skin is ruddy, which is equivalent to doing high-end beauty. Ya thought, if she had been doing it inside, she should also have good body and good skin. Alas! If she wasn't in a hurry to repay the debt, Ya felt that working and living in the health center were quite comfortable.

Once, when the tour guide Jin talked about Christianity in the store, several clerks said, "That's all a lie, I don't believe it!" ”

"Faith is spiritual, and unbelief is not." Kim said the tour guide.

"There are many prophecies in the Bible that have been fulfilled in reality." Ya said.

Two days later, Guide Kim brought his laptop and he showed them a plate about the life of Jesus. When the plate was placed on Jesus' whipped to pieces, the male clerks shouted, "Fake, fake, fake!" Ya burst into tears and sobbed, and Guide Jin stared at her deeply a few times.

From then on, Guide Kim spoke about Christianity in front of Ya, consciously or unconsciously. From the conversation, Ya knew that Guide Jin was a devout believer. Guide Jin said that he did not believe in Christianity at all before, and he said that he used to be a gangster, eating, drinking, prostituting and gambling all kinds of drugs, until he later met his current girlfriend. My girlfriend was a devout Christian, and he was slowly converted and began to believe in Christianity.

Ya met the girlfriend of the tour guide Kim, who was a delicate Korean girl. His skin was fair, his face was ruddy, and his beautiful eyes, especially those beautiful eyes, shone like stars. Ya always felt a halo of holiness on her face.

Guide Kim's girlfriend is also a tour guide, she believes in the Lord's teachings and donates 1/10 of her income to the church. Presumably, her salary is not low, and Ya knows that the salary of the golden tour guide is five or six times that of her every month.

Guide Kim's girlfriend took to the streets every day after work with a pamphlet about the Bible to preach to the people. Every time one more person became religious, she felt a sense of pride in accomplishment. Whether it's the middle of summer or the bitter cold, Guide Kim's girlfriend insists on preaching after work. Her dedication also deeply touched the tour guide Kim, and he also began to preach consciously or unconsciously. He said to Ya, if you influence one person and one more believer, the world will have more goodness and warmth.

On Sunday, Guide Jin took Ya to a small church in Beijing to listen to the teachings.

In Beijing, there are many such small churches, and the members of the congregation rent a house and meet regularly to study. As soon as I started school, it was almost a day, and the disciples rented a house together to raise living expenses. Because on the day of study, we didn't go back until the evening, and everyone took a long bus ride to come to the small church, and we couldn't go back after two classes.

There are many Koreans who run such churches in Beijing, and their Bible books are half Korean and half Chinese, and many people in South Korea are obsessed with Christianity.

The guide Jarang Kim bought her a Bible, and the layout of the Bible made Jarang love for it. Guide Jin's girlfriend gave Ya a white scarf, which was as thin as a cicada's wings and embroidered with beautiful white flowers. The scarf is small and exquisite, and Ya likes it very much. Guide Jin instructed Ya to pray in the morning and evening, and to drape a scarf over her head when praying. This kind of ritual seems to have never been seen in her hometown, but Ya thinks there should be one.

One winter morning, although the sun was shining, the wind was so cold that it cut the face like a knife. Ya and Kim tour guide to meet at the small church. It is a day to remember, because the Kim tour guide said that today is the day of Ya's baptism.

The two of them each took a long bus ride before meeting at the small church.

The male pastor led Ya in prayer, and after the prayer, the female pastor led Ya to a room to change into a blue disposable dress that resembled pajamas. The male pastor said the prayer, and the female pastor poured a scoop of warm water on Ya's head, one scoop, two scoops...... Ya's hair and clothes were soaked. There was heating in the house, and Ya didn't feel cold. Then, the male pastor poured a small glass of red wine for Ya to drink, and handed Ya a small piece of round cake for her to eat.

This baptism is over, and it means that the flesh and blood of the Lord Jesus have been poured into Jah's body, and God is with her at all times. Just as a person has an ID card on earth, a person who has been baptized is equivalent to registering in heaven, which is equivalent to having a heavenly ID card.

From then on, Jah was a true Christian, and the glory of God shone upon her. Ya was not baptized in her hometown, and she felt that she was very unqualified, because unlike those devout Christians, she went to church every day and every Sunday, and she went more with her mother. She didn't fully understand many of the teachings of Christianity, but she believed that she was born with righteousness and goodness.

She always closed her eyes and prayed to God: Amen. Almighty Father in the universe! Forgive me for the sins I was born with, remember in me your righteousness and goodness, be with me, be with my parents, brothers and sisters, and be with the troubled world......

The Korean people are a people who can sing and dance. Once, the tour guide Jin invited the people in the store to sing in the dance hall. When the cheerful and agitated music sounded, Guide Jin jumped on the stage, holding a microphone in one hand and waving in the other, his singing voice was high-pitched and loud, he sang and danced at the same time, and he lit up the warm atmosphere of the entire dance hall by himself.

In the middle of the song, Guide Jin threw a flying kiss to his girlfriend in the audience, and said in a sonorous and powerful voice: "Wife, I love you!" Everyone turned to look at his girlfriend, who clapped her hands to the beat of the music like everyone else, and she smiled sweetly, and her beautiful face became more and more charming.

Looking at the Jin tour guide who was singing and dancing on the stage, Ya felt that he was a professional singer and dancer. The boss said that Koreans can play and live, and this is true.

There is a female clerk in the store, tall, fair-skinned, long flowing hair, and facial features that resemble a big star. ”

For a while, the female clerk stuck to the golden tour guide every day, and the two went in and out of pairs, and those male clerks coaxed when they saw them together. A female clerk said worriedly: "Will Guide Jin dump his girlfriend and ask her to be his girlfriend?" ”

Ya didn't say anything, but she believed that even if the female clerk was alive, it would be impossible for Guide Jin to be separated from his girlfriend. Because his girlfriend is as beautiful and holy as the stars in the sky, he is like a goddess in the eyes of Guide Jin. There is no second woman in this world who can surpass her beauty and her holiness. Even though the beautiful female clerk can attract Guide Jin for a while, she can't attract him for a lifetime.

Sure enough, a few months later, the female clerk lost her enthusiasm for Guide Kim. She left the shop and heard that she had found a tour guide boyfriend, who was willing to keep her like a canary and not let her go to work.