Aunt Qin's words made me stunned for a long time, and I was also at a loss for what to do. While my mother and I were stunned, my father stood a few steps ahead of him and suddenly turned around: "Where do you live?" ”

It seems that he doesn't quite believe in Aunt Qin'er's decision, after all, from the perspective of a normal person, choosing to stay instead of blasting me out is really the opposite. Although I never doubted Aunt Qin'er's purpose in letting me stay in the Cao family, in my heart, she has always been a good person, but under such circumstances, I am still extremely surprised to make the decision to let me stay.

In fact, at this moment, whether I go back to my mother's old house or continue to stay in the Cao family, it is not much different for me. I was terrified of which land I stayed on, and the icy atmosphere that made my blood coagulate was a chill that made people walk on thin ice.

And my father, a character I should have been very familiar with, not only looked so strange at this time, but also very strange all along. He turned his head back, put his hands in his trouser pockets and descended two steps, and just as he touched his feet to the floor of the hall, he turned back to the air and said, "Forget it, you can decide for yourself." With that, he went to the couch. The tone was so relaxed that I felt like I was some cheap item to be disposed of, or a lamb to the slaughter on the board. I raised my eyelids and looked at my father in the dim shadow, and I couldn't help but feel a sourness.

My mother never let go of the hand she put on me, she was afraid that I would be hurt in the Cao family, so although the plan had been decided, she still did not move.

Grandma turned her head: "That's it." Hey, after all, adults are adults' business, and children are still young, so they can't delay their learning. My mother looked back at me and reluctantly let go of her hand. Xue Hao got up from the sofa: "I'll send you." Then, he left Cao's house with his mother. When stepping out of the gate, the mother turned back with two steps uneasily, and finally, hesitantly stepped out of the territory of the Cao family.

After the door was closed, I suddenly felt a sense of emptiness rise in my heart. The conservation of this number from being alone to being alone did not bring me to a calm mind, even though from the day I stepped out of the old house, I had already discarded in my heart all the good greetings that came from the closed door of my self. And this sudden pouring rain woke up the little loneliness I had buried in the bottom of my heart, I wanted to lean under an umbrella, or find an eaves to hide for a while, however, when my mother was there, I did not react, when she took away a certain temperature and humidity of the air beside me, I suddenly realized the taste of emptiness.

Aunt Qin stood up and said to herself, "I'm tired and asleep." This sentence seems to be said to Cao Ge, who is far away from her. When I saw Cao Ge passing by me, he opened his mouth to ask Aunt Qin something, but finally swallowed back. Aunt Qin went straight back to her bedroom, I originally thought that she would go to see Cao Cancan who was separated by two rooms first, but she didn't. Perhaps, the trauma in her heart is too big, so big that she has no time to take care of the joys, angers and sorrows of others, even her own daughter.

I stood there for a long time, not knowing what to do. In the center of this staircase, looking forward, all the way down, is both flat and abyss; Looking up, it is unfathomable, cloudy and foggy, cold like the top of a mountain, and frosty like the pole of the day.

After sending Aunt Qin into the house, Cao Ge turned around and patted me on the shoulder: "You~ Did you already know your life experience?" ”

I didn't look up, but I nodded.

"Well, then I have nothing to comfort you, wash and sleep! I believe you are a strong child, and you should be able to understand the right and wrong between adults. You're still young, and there's still a long way to go, so don't let that disrupt your progress. ”

I didn't answer. After turning around and going upstairs, I didn't wash my face as Cao Ge asked, but chose to lock myself directly in the house. I propped my hands behind my body and leaned against the back of the door.

I looked up at the old sycamore tree outside the window opposite, tonight from no wind to wind, and then to no wind, the sycamore leaves at this time, just like that, pulled their heads stupidly at the end of the branches, calm appearance, let me unconsciously feel, this sycamore looks, so sad.

This sadness, silently, like a mother, can't raise her head, and her eyes are full of sourness. It's not that she doesn't have the face to face her unbearable world, she is the shadow of all the loving people around her, such as me.

This pain comes from the bottom of the heart, because the imminent facts show that, for better or worse, there is a certain pattern and spatial node in which it is predetermined. It's not the fault of having enough energy, but it's the fault of having a heart.

I leaned against the door, and suddenly remembered what Uncle Zhao had said to me when I entered the door of Cao's house, and everything would pass. Yes, facing the future, with no end in sight, I know that everything will pass, but I still have uneasiness. I don't know where the future holds, but I have a vague sense that the current situation will not last long.

It was raining in Nanjing in the evening, so when I paced to the window, I suddenly felt a certain atmosphere of damp air that made people cry and went straight to the bottom of my heart.

I have always chosen not to cry when there is a hustle and bustle outside the door, but when the door is closed, all the atmosphere that the sycamore has infected and given is returned to me.

At that moment, my tears poured out like a sea bursting its banks.

If you ask me why I cry?

I'm crying, my future, nothing.

That night, I don't know, how many people in the Cao family are like me, sleeping and waking up, waking up and sleeping, and how many people will stay awake all night? In my only fragmented sleep, I struggled to piece together the same scattered dreams, but perhaps because I was too anxious and frightened, most of my dreams were scenes of being driven away.

It is said that dreams are the opposite of reality, but I would rather be expelled than be cautious every day, and every word I say is like I am afraid of stepping on nails. I was afraid that I was suffering from a disease called depression, but I was too worried. Before I was depressed, Aunt Jean was sick.

No matter what happens, I think, there is no way back.

I woke up early that morning, and when I got up, I looked out through the uncurtained window as usual. It was foggy outside. Faintly, I could see a lot of dew hanging on the leaves of the sycamore.

But the dew was not crystal clear at all, as if a natural meteorite had fallen on a person's heart, burning the heart and burning tears.

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