Section 207 Farewell Ceremony of the Bloodstained Years
The instructor, who had drunk a little too much, didn't seem to hear the important words in Jiang Shanshan's words clearly, and he shouted to me in front of me: "Go, Cao Muxi." Talk to everyone, you know, you are such a big child, your heart is very fragile, I also had that time. Tell me, maybe, someone else can really use it. For example, listening to music, raising small animals and the like can relieve tension and anxiety, divert attention, and so on. Go, talk go. ”
I didn't pay attention to the instructor's words. I slowly looked up: "I don't have anything to say. ”
Jiang Shanshan looked surprised, then put the small microphone in her hand close to her mouth, and said slowly: "Can't!" Cao Muxi, how legendary is your life experience? Aren't you an illegitimate child who killed your stepmother? ”
When Jiang Shanshan said the word illegitimate child, she bent down to me and said it word by word. I know that she chose to use the microphone to amplify this sentence so that everyone can hear it clearly, I, Cao Muxi, am an illegitimate child!
The whole courtyard was silent! Silent! I saw Liu Zhen on my right hand looking at me with round eyes, and what I presented to her was only half of her face. I don't know if Liu Zhen at that time could really understand the pain in my heart. I saw the frightened expressions of the girls at my tablemates, and I saw the instructor sitting at the farthest table trying to shake his head in consciousness.
Yes, it was all too sudden, for me, for everyone, too suddenly.
My head was buzzing, and I didn't hear what she said again, but I heard the last sentence: "You didn't even want your own mother and went to your father's house for the sake of Pantu Wealth, and as a result, your mother died of depression." ”
This sentence made my blood gush on the top of my head, and I grabbed the beer bottle on the table with both hands at a very fast speed, stood up and walked around the chair, and smashed it on Jiang Shanshan's head! At that moment, time seemed to come back to reality from standing still. A huge scream rang out all over the yard! Jiang Shanshan passed through the small microphone in her hand, and the "ah~" before she fell down still echoed in the sky above the courtyard that night.
At that time, I wanted time to stand still and to have it all over again. It's not that I regret what I did, but that I feel depressed that I messed up that parting drink.
I just stood there with two broken bottles. The moment I looked down, I saw blood dripping from the bottle, falling rhythmically on the concrete floor. Even though the dim light couldn't illuminate its crimson color, I still felt it had a dazzling brightness.
I saw the instructors and classmates rushing in the distance, and I saw the panicked female classmates struggling to squeeze into a corner. Those dodging and fearing are they afraid of Jiang Shanshan lying on the ground covering their foreheads, or they are afraid of me who is carrying a wine bottle.
I saw Liu Zhen who was stunned on the side, she was still at the farewell banquet where the hangover had not yet succeeded, her slightly open mouth seemed to have something to say, I guess, she must have wanted to say, Mu Xi, it turns out that you still have an unknown past, but why have I never seen you sad?
I was stunned, and suddenly remembered that sentence will come a long time.
I couldn't help but laugh dumbly. God seems to have predestined the end of something, just like I caught a cold at this time, which is destined for this farewell ceremony that is related to the youth, and I am absent. Will there still be a day to come? Fang Chang didn't know.
The dinner party that ended hastily ended in this way, and ended in the oolong with no end to it. Jiang Shanshan was taken to the hospital, and I went back to school. After the instructor came back from the hospital, he told me that Jiang Shanshan had more than a dozen stitches on her head, but fortunately, the wound was on the scalp and would not break the phase, but he still hoped that I would go to the hospital to owe her.
As soon as the instructor finished speaking, I raised my head and looked into his eyes, and replied firmly, "I don't." ”
"Cao Muxi, no matter what Jiang Shanshan said stimulated you, but the result of the incident is clear here, you did it! You have to understand a truth, even if the other party's words are inappropriate and hurtful, the final responsibility will still be yours. Why? Because man sees first and then listens. This is an indisputable fact! "The instructor kept trying to persuade me.
"Well, that's right, yes, people are sensory creatures, and that's why everyone only looks at the surface of events when they look at things, and then add their own reverie to do nonsense! Who cares about a person's heart? Have it? ”
"Cao Muxi, we don't have time to discuss the sensory conduction of human nature now, I am going to deal with this incident with you now!"
"How?" I asked the instructor.
"Go to the hospital and apologize. Here's what you need to do now. ”
"I'm sorry, I can't." I'm very tough.
"You can't do it? You injured someone, and now you're lying in the hospital, just got a dozen stitches, and you say you can't do it? People's parents are in the hospital now, do you have the courage to beat someone, and when you apologize, are you cowardly? "The instructor was obviously angry with my attitude as well.
"I'm instigated? Hehe~ You're right, yes, I'm cowardly! I admit it! Because, until today, I have understood a truth, in this world, there is no such thing as goodness! Jiang Shanshan is right, I am an illegitimate child, but when I came to this world, someone asked me if I would like to have this identity? Has anyone ever asked if I like it or not? No. For so many years, I have been subjected to the cold eyes, ridicule and ridicule of others all the way, who knows how much psychological pressure I was under when I was a child? That's right, my dad's wife died, but it had nothing to do with me. I don't understand, why is my father's wife who is justifiably married dead, and they all say that I am the victim, but my mother is gone, so they say that they are to blame? Why do you say that I deserve to be where I am today? I don't understand, what exactly am I doing wrong! I looked forward to junior high school from elementary school to junior high school, from junior high school to high school, and from high school to university. Step by step, I told myself that it was okay, and when I grew up, no one would talk about me anymore. The result? When Jiang Shanshan took the microphone and said in front of so many people that I was an illegitimate child, I didn't feel ashamed, but I felt cold to the ground! Human nature is really not friendly at all, and there will be people who have not mentioned it for more than two years. Let me apologize, it won't. I can accept any punishment, but it's, absolutely, no apologies! The world is not kind to me, and I want to return it. Because I found out that this society is a fucking master who bullies the weak and fears the hard! I was hoarse and impassioned to the instructor opposite, and there were many classmates in the room at that time. I'm not shying away from anyone, there's no need.
My words silenced a room of people. That's right, it's not scared, it's really silent. I saw the instructor open his mouth, but finally swallowed his saliva, but in the end he didn't say anything. The squad leader paused: "That, that, Cao Muxi, yes, or else, you, you better go back to the dormitory." Is there anyone with you? Or, me, I'll find someone to send you? ”
"No, you don't." I turned around and was about to leave. When I was about to go out, I turned back to the instructor and said, "I'm sorry, I messed up your kindness at such an important party today." After speaking, he hurried out of the office without waiting for a reply from behind him.
As soon as I turned the door, I saw Liu Zhen coming up. What I just said, presumably, she also heard. This can be seen from her expression. She, like the rest of the room, had her hands in the air, her mouth open but she didn't speak. I passed by her, didn't give her a chance to speak, and ran all the way out of the building.
When I stopped under a street lamp somewhere on campus, my throat was dry and bloodshot, and I gasped for air. I leaned my body against the lamp pole behind me, and I looked up at the insects flying under the lamp, and suddenly felt that the flying insects that were close to the lights for warmth looked like me. Just as I love life and the world with all my heart, I flew to her side to seek warmth, and as a result, warmth is always short-lived, and when the cold wind comes, death is an unchangeable way back.
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