When Cao Cancan ran out of the hall of Cao's house, the crowded space instantly felt empty, and I suddenly felt a breath of fresh air rushing to the top of my skull. I simply took a deep breath, straightened my body, and used every inch of my body pores to feel this hard-won and short-term "comfort".

The Cao family, which was quiet for a moment, did not look like a trapped beast at this time, but more like the theater stage where his mother used to sing, no, to be exact, it was the backstage of the stage, messy and messy. I hung my arms loosely, and stood like that at the entrance of the backstage, outside which was the stage, singing to others; The door is real, and the narrative is the unchangeable life of mediocre people.

As I stood intently, I suddenly noticed that in a corner of the huge house, a figure was slowly walking towards me with staggering steps, and I looked up sharply, it was my mother.

When my mother stood in front of me again, it was only a week since we last saw me. However, I felt as if I had been separated from her for thousands of years, both familiar and strange. I looked at the woman who was close to me, haggard, thoughtful, emaciated, depressed, depressed, helpless, speechless, etc., I desperately searched in my limited mind for all the words that could describe her state, but I could not hold up any card to cover the old appearance that was deeply imprinted in my heart, maybe I couldn't bear it, maybe I was unwilling.

In my mother's hand, I still clutched the old handkerchief tightly, just like the sails of youth that I raised in the evening of the sunset when I was a child.

She covered her mouth with a handkerchief, her tears never stopped, and she kept suppressing her own Iyi's crying. She stretched out her right hand to touch my hair, and when it stopped at my ear, I subconsciously avoided it. The mother's hand suddenly turned from lonely to helpless. The limbs frozen in mid-air were like the sycamore branches outside my second-floor window, lifeless and withered, but still yearning to touch the sky. The mother slowly withdrew her arm, and the slow speed was like a slow movie that froze time, playing leisurely in this Nanjing night that gradually withdrew from the soul.

The mother, who withdrew her hand, suddenly cried loudly, and finally hid her face with her hands, crying so much that her shoulders twitched, like a child who had done something wrong. I knew that she was trying to hide the existing grief caused by the mistakes she had made at a young age.

However, the Cao family is too empty and deserted, my mother is standing in front of me like that, but there is no medium in this huge environment that can hide my mother's emotions on the verge of collapse, that thin body, as if anyone with confidence can knock it down, and crush it, and then split her incomplete life.

I should feel sorry for this woman, she looks like this, but I am indifferent. Perhaps, as Cao Cancan said two days ago, the world of adults, the affairs of adults, what can children do? Just let it go. If you have not felt the gloom of life in the adult world and affected your future, it is the favor of God.

The mother seemed tired of crying, and she moved a few steps and leaned against the cupboard in the doorway. The tears are no longer surging, but they are still trickling. She lowered her head, there was no crying, and the Cao family suddenly had a kind of misery hidden in the silence. I stared at her, only to see her raise her head, meeting my eyes. I subconsciously chose to dodge, but I didn't know where to land my wandering gaze on the back of the stage.

After all, there is drama everywhere, and drama is like life.

Suddenly, I heard a noise coming from the courtyard of the Cao family. On this already miserable night, Cao Cancan's cry in the courtyard echoed in the sky above Nanjing's rain, empty and heart-wrenching. When unfamiliar voices kept asking what was going on, Grandma's answer was like a fable - "Three Hundred Taels of Silver in This Place", blindly trying to cover up this ugly incident. However, it is a lame drama to cover up the show, not to mention that mediocre people are not good at playing the leading role, after all, grease and powder, red mouth and white teeth, not everyone can do the ability to work.

The noise outside made my heart extremely calm, and I had a state of mind that I never expected.

If you ask me how I did it, it took me a long time to find the answer in a book – it is better to mourn than to die. Yes, when a person's emotions reach the extreme, they already disdain to find an outlet for venting, what she/he needs is a kind of emotional stability, to find a way forward for the soul. Tears are sometimes not the product of cowardice, their existence does not explain anything, but only represents a certain person's emotions to reach a certain node.

I quietly looked at my mother on the side, she didn't seem to care about the singing and storyline outside the door, she was still standing like that, I couldn't see her eyes, I couldn't read the words behind her speechlessness.

Of course, when I had the opportunity to speculate on her thoughts, I chose to run away. This dodging inner activity, as I call it, is unbearable.

I isolated myself from the whole incident, like, at that time, I slowly raised my eyelids and listened to Cao Cancan's hoarse voice outside: "Why! Why not me! Why can't I just have a normal family like everyone else?! Why! ”

I was shocked in my heart, why? I slowly closed my eyes again, yes, why, Cao Cancan's words hit the bottom of my heart. If compared to Cao Cancan, I don't even have a basic member group. Is it pathetic? Is it ridiculous? I used to think so, but now I'm numb. It seems that no, more real and closer to my life than there is.

My mind went from sobriety to confusion, and after shaking my head, I passed my mother's side, went straight upstairs, and then went into my room, locking the door. I heard my mother's footsteps rushing up behind me, but I ignored them. The purpose of her catching up was nothing more than that I was afraid that my self-esteem would be hurt because of this incident, and I would not be able to think about it and do something stupid. Actually, the mother thought too much. I'll admit that I'm a more thoughtful child, but I'm not stupid enough to put my life on the end of adult grievances.

My mother knocked the door, shouting my name as she knocked. My mother knocked so hard that I thought my palms hurt.

It wasn't until my mother shouted and shouted that I suddenly shouted "Liu Muxi" from my mouth, I stood by the window, my heart shook slightly, like an electric shock, and turned around to open the door. The door opened so suddenly that my mother almost slapped her palm on my face.

I found out that my mother and I had face-to-face language communication disorder after I changed my name. The moment my mother saw me, she suddenly stopped talking. When I saw that the tears in her eyes began to swell again, I whispered in a voice like a mosquito, "No." I want to be on my own for a while. After speaking, without waiting for my mother's words, or for my mother to convey her concern and love with her silence at this time, I closed the door that had turned human nature but could not redeem the regret of my soul.