Seeing that I didn't respond, Zou Moyan tried to hug me in his arms, it was very inconvenient for him to move freely with one hand, I flashed and withdrew from his arms.

"Mo Yan, you know the reason for your father's death, why didn't you tell me? And the relationship between you and Li Nan before, you can tell me when we meet again, and Xue'er's existence, she is your sister, not your child, why don't you tell me all this? ”

"I have my troubles."

"Yes, you have your troubles, from the beginning you wanted to indulge me, you calculated everything and watched me throw myself into the net, this game was arranged by yourself, every link is under your control, everyone is watching my jokes, watching this so-called perfect ending."

"I love you, that's true."

"I know, but it's not based on our honesty with each other, aren't you trying to take revenge on me and imprison me in your arms step by step? You don't want our children, you acquiesce in Li Nan's existence, and even my Aunt Cai's car accident you know the truth and don't tell me, and when I knew that they blamed you for the identity of the so-called car accident master, I still racked my brains to justify, you let me believe you, I will believe you, but you never gave me a reason to believe you. ”

"Don't get excited." Zou Moyan looked at me, with a hurt look in his eyes, "Some things are better than knowing happiness, Jiajia, everything you see may not be the truth, there is a relationship between the cocoons and the cocoon, I don't want you to go through this process, what I want to give you is just a result, for Li Nan, I default because she is Xue'er's mother, and it was not the best time to move to her before, and now she has also received the punishment she deserves." ”

"You're wrong, Zou Moyan, you said you didn't want me to go through these processes, but don't forget, everything is because of it, how can I really escape all this?"

Zou Moyan stopped talking, he took off his cold appearance that he was good at disguise before, and looked at me with an inquiring gaze in front of me, he was afraid that I would debunk her, afraid of my questioning, afraid of my doubts, and those uncertainties.

And I, under the pretended composure of my best efforts, was left with only a heart full of holes.

Thinking of the life and death experienced together these days, those blood-stained pictures, my heart panicked for a while, Zou Moyan gave me the best love in the world, but the process was really hard enough.

My Zou Moyan really loves me so much that he has done whatever it takes.

Zou Moyan, who used to be sullen and sensual, has now completely become a man who is uncertain and bloodthirsty and indifferent!

We sat quietly, his eyes looking at me, and I, stunned, looking at the cup in front of me.

It was probably because I felt that my eyes were sour, so I blinked my eyes and looked up at Zou Moyan, and she looked at me with a fascination, and at the moment when I met my gaze, he quickly shifted his gaze.

After a long time, I said, "I want to go home." ”

Zou Moyan asked the driver to drive me out of He Chang'an's factory, I don't think I want to come here again in my life, on the way back, I kept playing all the clips about Li Nan back and forth in my mind, her arrogance, no one in her eyes, her own opinion, and her final bleak end.

When the car was about to arrive downstairs at Zou Moyan's house, I told the driver an address, and the driver parked the car, as if asking Zou Moyan what he meant, I turned to Zou Moyan and said, "I want to go back to my own home?" ”

Zou Moyan looked at me carefully, "Why?" ”

"There's no reason, it's just that I feel so tired after all this and want to go back to my house to rest."

Zou Moyan didn't speak, I looked at his tightly knit brows and said, "Moyan, you see so many things have happened between us, you love me, I love you, our relationship is no problem, don't doubt whether I love you, I really need to be quiet now, to smooth out all this relationship." ”

Zou Moyan's hand clenched tightly into a fist, and after a while, he said: "You are very hypocritical, and there must be a limit to your willfulness." ”

I nodded, "Yes, I'm very hypocritical, my hypocrisy used to you, and now my hypocrisy is that I am used to myself." I'm not willful, I'm just following my heart's content. ”

Zou Moyan did not hesitate to let the driver open the whole lock, I opened the door and got out of the car, he closed his eyes and didn't say a word, and I, after getting out of the car, walked in the opposite direction.

Zou Moyan, in fact, I really have no way to accept that you don't love our children, and I can't accept that you have always known all the things to indulge me, you really love me, and this so-called true love is not your original purpose after all, everything you do to me is based on revenge after all.

I love you so much that I can die, and you love me so much that I have nothing to fear.

But there are a lot of estrangements between us, deception, the past, and now my confusion about the future.

I'm timid, afraid of pain, hypocritical, vain, my stage fright together in front of the so-called happiness, it's like a crossroads in life, four directions, I always have to choose one.

And I, after all, am no longer the He Jiaran who can live a lifetime by love.

After going through all these things, I want to settle down and start a new life of my own.

I called my father, and he said he was busy, and I said where Aunt Cai was buried, and he gave me an address.

I took a taxi to that address, a cemetery in the suburbs, it was very quiet, I bought flowers to Aunt Cai's tombstone, and looked at the photos on the tombstone for a long time.

Aunt Cai, why am I still unhappy when all this is over?

In the photo above the tombstone, Aunt Cai smiled calmly and naturally, and I said a lot about what has happened recently, including my current situation, my confusion, and many things I am thinking about in front of me.

It was getting late, and I left the cemetery and stepped into the taxi home alone.

I talked to my brother on the phone for a while in the evening, and he said that he was very good, and his sister-in-law was also very good, which reassured me.

I told the news of Aunt Cai's death, and my brother was silent for a while and said, it's okay to leave, and suffer less.

I said that I am also very good, brother, what I couldn't see and put down before, now it's clear.

My brother said, Jiajia, you will be happy.

&

After a few days I did not contact Zou Moyan, Zou Moyan did not contact me, everything returned to the way it was before, I began to look for a job, what office clerk or sales and the like I went to the interview, picked, and finally went to a trading company to do foreign language translation, at that time the interviewer did not look at my academic qualifications, but my proficiency in the four Chinese, he asked me to translate a few brief messages on the spot, I did my best without any mistakes.

At this time, shouldn't I thank Zou Moyan for forcing me to learn these things in the first place?

I didn't think about it now, but it became my survival skill.

The treatment of the new job is much worse than the previous treatment in the bank, the probation period is 3,000 and 5, and after the regularization, 4,000 plus commission, I roughly calculated, I have to translate about 100,000 words of documents every month, so I can get about 6,000, and if I don't do this job, I don't have any job opportunities now.

Thinking about my rent, thinking about my daily expenses, I chose to come to the office the next day to report.

The company is not very big, everyone is in a huge office area, we are a middle-aged man with oily hair and flour, Vice President Zhao, he is very harsh on newcomers, the first day I have not started translating documents to tell me where to print, where to copy, where to buy fast food, where to receive express delivery, I was busy all morning when my feet did not hit the ground, he asked me to help him make coffee, I was angry, to his desk, asked him, "Vice President Zhao, I am here to be a translator, not a miscellaneous girl." ”

"Does it matter?" Vice President Zhao drank coffee slowly, "The newcomers are like this, they can do it, they can't do it." ”

"You ......" I gritted my teeth and swallowed the words I was going to curse behind, Vice President Zhao looked proud, looked at my whole body, and sneered, "Think we are so mixed up here?" That's how we all started. ”

When I started working in the bank, it was because Lu Chengying found someone to say a word, and coupled with my academic qualifications, everyone had an inexplicable respect for me, and naturally I didn't suffer this kind of grievance, and Vice President Zhao's current virtue swaggered in front of me, I can't wait to spill a cup of coffee.

"Don't look at me with that unconvinced look." Vice President Zhao stood up proudly and sneered, "Your work is quantitative, you can't finish it during the day and go home to do it at night, you have to listen to my arrangement in the company, understand?" ”

"Okay."

"Now go to the eighth floor of the office building opposite me to get a document."

This was obviously beyond the scope of my work, I glared at him resentfully and then went downstairs, running to the opposite office building, thinking that it was very close, I had no coat, a suit and a narrow skirt and flesh-colored stockings, in this early spring season, I shivered a little when I crossed the street.

I went to the opposite side and took things to wait for the elevator, and after entering, I found that the elevator was going up, and I was annoyed that I didn't see it clearly, Zou Moyan suddenly appeared in front of me, he was followed by two people, as if he was reporting something, Zou Moyan was obviously stunned when he saw it, but he also walked into the elevator quickly, nothing unusual.

He lost weight, his eyes were even colder, and his face was dull and handsome.

After the spacious elevator, Zou Moyan and I, as well as the two people brought by Zou Moyan, why do I think the air is so thin?

The elevator reached the first floor, I was about to go down, suddenly felt a warmth on my shoulders, Zou Moyan put his black coat on my body, I looked back at him, he got out of the elevator expressionlessly, without looking at me.

And when my hand touched the coat on my body, the warmth moistened my heart.