After lunch, except for the two little cousins, who were in good spirits and still playing in the living room, everyone else dispersed for a lunch break. The sun was so hot at noon in July that when you walked out, your backbone could be lit through your clothes. Yun Feng listened to his grandmother and aunt chatting for a while, and then went to take a lunch break with him, and the little uncle Yun Yi was still sitting in the corner of the living room, holding his knees with his hands, looking at the two girls of the second uncle's family and his two little nieces playing, with a smile on his face.

"Little uncle, aren't you going to take a lunch break?"

Yun Feng beckoned.

"Well, don't go, you go."

Yun replied to the eldest niece's words inarticulately.

Yun Feng and the little uncle are also very close, when he was a child, Yun Feng was the youngest in the family, and his grandmother always asked the little uncle to take the three or four-year-old Yun Feng to the small shop at the edge of the village to buy a small bag of dried bayberry for five cents a penny, and later the dried bayberry rose to a dime a bag.

"Uncle, take it apart and give me one."

Little Yun Feng would always jump to grab the small bag of dried bayberry that the little uncle held high in the palm of his palm.

"Okay, I'll give it to you, but I want you one and I'll give you one."

The little uncle will always ask his niece like this.

"No, no, no, a bag is so small, and it will soon be gone."

Yun Feng still remembers clearly how he ate alone.

"Then I'll eat one and I'll give you the rest, okay?"

The little uncle was less than ten years old back then, so he was naturally greedy, but he also knew that he would let his niece.

"Okay then."

Xiao Yunfeng stared at the dried bayberry that was held in his hand by his little uncle, thinking that if he ate one less, he would eat one less, and it didn't matter if he gave it to his little uncle.

"Here you go."

Every time, the little uncle would eat one in Xiao Yunfeng's eyes seriously, and then pour two or three grains into the palm of his hand, and when the niece opened her mouth wide and thought it was for her, she instantly threw it into her mouth, causing the niece to shout for a while, and then give her the rest of the bayberry with the bag, and the two of them gave up.

Many times, the uncle and nephew also exchanged conditions, that is, the little uncle didn't tell Yun Feng's father, Xiao Yunfeng pestered his grandmother to buy her snacks to eat, and Xiao Yunfeng didn't tell his grandmother and grandfather that the little uncle snatched her snacks again.

Now, Yun Feng has grown from a three- or four-year-old little girl to a big girl, and the little uncle has also become a rural youth, but this rural youth, listening to the grandparents, fathers, and aunts at home, is not ready to start a family for him.

Probably because he has this disease, he is too busy to take care of himself, and he needs the care of his family, if he finds another one back, he may also have a disability, and when he gives birth to a child, he doesn't know if it is genetic, but it is even more difficult for the family to take care of.

Every time he heard this, Yun Feng was like chewing a piece of green persimmon skin, sour and irresistible, but helpless.

Yun Feng heard from his grandmother that his father once wanted to take Yun Yi to find someone to see, but he never fulfilled it due to financial reasons.

The other two Yun Feng's uncles, Yun Gang and Yun Jin, are even more impossible, the brothers are both from the countryside, relying on the sky to eat, and occasionally working as plasterers in surrounding villages and towns to support their two children to go to school.

Yun Feng's grandparents, who are Yun Yi's parents, are common old men and old ladies in the countryside, and they still have to work at an old age, how can they have the money to treat Yun Yi?

Besides, everyone thinks that Yun Yi is a stubborn disease that is difficult to treat, and if he stops in the middle of the treatment, it will have a bad effect, so it is better to leave it like this. Everyone resigned themselves to Yunyi's illness.

Yun Yi himself didn't know anything except that he had followed his brothers out of the county seat four or five kilometers away, knew the way to the county seat, and knew how to change money for buying things. Perhaps, he watched his brothers get married and marry daughters-in-law, and he was waiting for them to say a kiss to him.

But how did he know that what awaited him in the future would still be an endless wait?

If every life is equal, why are some lives, when they are born, perhaps, some of the rights to equality and freedom that should have been in life have been unconsciously deprived without realizing it?

If every life should have the right to choose, but some lives have no choice in his own hands.

Such a kind of helplessness has been haunting Yun Feng's heart from time to time, so that she can only sigh alone in her heart when helplessness and sadness come, and then hide this emotion in her life that shines with the light of hope.

Even Li Yunhe, who has been admitted to a medical university, has never mentioned it. She doesn't want to trouble others, and besides, medical majors are very finely divided, Li Yunhe is studying surgery, and he is probably at a loss for the problem of his little uncle Yunyi.

Maybe Yun Feng himself didn't expect it, because when he was a child with his grandmother, his grandmother blindly spoiled herself, let herself stretch out her hands, and opened her mouth to eat without using her brain to solve any problems, when she was ten years old, she lived with her parents, and suddenly turned to the strict and serious discipline of her parents, Yun Feng has been in a state of fear and anxiety of alienation from her parents in this transition, and because of her kindness and meekness, she naturally and completely takes responsibility for the emotional changes of her parents at home, but she places herself behind everyone in the family. I will never think of finding help from others, nor will I think of organizing the power of people and things around me to work together.

This kind of thinking of doing things and solving problems has not been inspired and guided, which cannot but be said to be a huge loss for Yun Feng, who is very popular and kind-hearted. The handling and choice of many things in her life have also brought immeasurable impacts, such as the matter with Shanantong, when there is a contradiction between the development of the two, she always thinks about one-sidedness, either she retreats to complete Shananan, or she simply gives up, and never seriously thinks about whether the two sides can discuss and then solve it together.

And once she encounters a problem that her personal ability cannot solve, she will be stuffy in her heart, waiting, waiting for the solution of the problem can only secretly escape, but she still does not let go of herself and bears the responsibility of evading the problem, not to mention the destruction of her own soul, the most important thing is to invisibly form a habit of taking the initiative to take all the responsibility, if this habit is equivalent to the ability to go out of the society in the future, encounter various affairs, the responsibility and the responsibility that should not be born, she has all gathered her own responsibility, I suffered a big loss for myself and didn't know it.

This lack of organization and management ability, the lack of comprehensive solution to personnel problems is actually not irreparable, the most terrible thing is that Yun Feng because of such a growth environment brings not only the lack of such an ability, but also the lack of such a ability to sprout thinking soil, simply put, her heart, about this aspect, is a darkness, unconscious.

If consciousness is a seed, then the black soil without seeds, no matter how fertile, cannot produce a flower, let alone bear fruit.

What's more, because of the lack of emotion since she was a child, coupled with the weak nature of her character, she has formed a kind of closure that she doesn't even know herself, and she doesn't know how to effectively express her inner emotions and emotions, which also affects her expression and communication of these problems that she avoids in her heart, even if she gets along with her family and boyfriend day and night, she can't know - perhaps, the lonely black hole in her heart with a big mouth and a cold wind is also like this, right?

Therefore, she will not be able to get timely help from the people around her, nor can she really drive her behavior, so as to sow a seed of consciousness in the black soil of her heart that knows how to distinguish responsibilities in personnel and knows how to organize, coordinate and co-ordinate.

For Yunfeng, this kind of awareness of taking responsibility for a large amount of responsibility and lacking the comprehensive solution thinking to solve personnel problems is actually not an acquired disability for Yunfeng.

It's just that her invisible disability affects her on the road of life, hidden so that no one can know it, and it is even more terrifying - any kind of deficiency may fall into the abyss of the soul or life in the future, especially in a big event, like a barrier-free gap connecting the door of darkness.