238. Loss of voice
There is an emotion that can be placed, but not touched.
That's how I feel at this time, if I don't think about it, then it stays in that corner all the time, but once I dig it up, then it starts to hurt. Especially when I thought of the ruined face under the black veil and the sound of loss, the pain began to spread. I couldn't help but take a step forward, but he stepped away, still about two meters away from me.
I stared in, lifted my eyelashes and asked, "This is the distance between me and you?" After a pause, he spit out the word: "Dad? ”
The body shook, and he didn't seem to be as calm as I was in the black robe.
I stepped forward again and he didn't back down, even though the black scarf couldn't see his face, but I could still feel the gaze coming through behind the cloth.
Indifference is the only feeling I have, like looking at a stranger.
Thirteen years, has this time span really reached the point where even if they are as close as father and daughter, they have become strangers? I was questioning myself in my head, and when I walked up to him, I met those eyes, gritted my teeth and stretched out my hand.
Instinctively or subconsciously he leaned back to avoid my hand, but I was just half in the air, and for about half a minute, I stretched out my hand to remove the black veil little by little. The mottled face may seem hideous to others, but I felt uncomfortable in my heart, and I knew from Zhu Kekou that it was caused by the fire, but I still asked, "Why is this happening?" ”
Ben didn't really want him to answer, but he asked unspeakably in his heart at the moment. But before he could be silent, a hoarse voice crossed his eardrums: "You shouldn't have come here." ”
I was completely stunned, he wasn't ...... Can't speak anymore?
"If you have the opportunity to go out, you leave immediately, this is not as simple as you think."
After hearing him speak again, I suddenly had a frustration in my body: "Why are you pretending to be deaf and dumb when you can speak?" He was silent and only looked at me indifferently, that look made me even more uncomfortable, and all the things that had been suppressed for a long time still rushed out of the gate: "I really admire you, it's been thirteen years since you left, and you can pretend not to know your biological daughter when you see it again." Is it true that even if I die here today, you won't blink an eyelid? ”
"If it was, I wouldn't be standing here right now." This is the sentence that burst out after he was silent for a while.
I was silent when I heard this, and if it were, he wouldn't be standing here. At best, I think that when I was in life and death, he finally came to the rescue, but on the other hand, if I didn't have such a desperate situation, he would still only be his way.
It's a little sad, but understands that it's true. It's like I didn't recognize him immediately after I recognized him in handwriting, and he never thought to identify himself when he saw me again thirteen years later.
Full of indignation, it seemed that a basin of ice water was poured from the head in an instant, and all thoughts were gone. He sat down on the ground and whispered, "You can leave now." ”
The feet under my nose turned around after a moment of silence, and a sarcastic smile appeared at the corner of my mouth. I simply closed my eyes, and I couldn't see it, but I could hear footsteps if I didn't close my ears.
It seemed that he was not walking towards the phoenix wood, but instead bypassed me and walked behind him. Wait, behind you?! Only then did I remember that Gu Xi was still lying there, and when I was about to turn around, I suddenly heard a hoarse voice coming: "Don't pretend anymore when you wake up." ”
I was shocked, and when I turned around, I saw Gu Xi sitting up from the ground, his eyes clear, and there was no look at all as if he had just woken up from a coma. Especially his relationship with ...... Between Dao and Fei, there is an obvious atmosphere of confrontation.
After what I had just experienced, I thought he might be more willing to accept the name "Dao Fei" instead of, Chang Qing.
The contemplative atmosphere lasted for a while, and Gu Xi broke the silence: "Tell me why you are here, right?" I was stunned, and suddenly a thought flashed through my mind, intuition is impossible, but...... All the previous analysis and judgment was that Yu was also in this space, even if Gu Xi and I had ruled out the possibility that he was Yu due to Daofei's age, but I couldn't help but stretch Yu's memory to the pen pal.
He is the closest person to me, and he knows my condition best, if he is Yu, wouldn't it be the easiest letter to reach me? But after thinking that all but the seventh letter had the postmark of Bryn's Town, did he deliberately go to Bryn's Town to send it? Why not? Didn't he sense him later in the underground siege of Bryntown?
It's not right, we learned that Yu's name came from Xie Xiaoqin's mouth, she was attached to him and called him Brother Yu, it shouldn't be his age...... My mind was confused, and I kept tornating between doubt and denial, completely forgetting where I was. It was a low call that pulled back my stray thoughts: "Little wish? ”
I looked up blankly, and my first reaction was to look at Dao Fei who was nearby, and then I remembered that he had never called my name like this, and only Gu Xi would be called like this. So when I turned my eyes to that side, I saw that Gu Xi's expression seemed to be a little unhappy, and my eyes were faintly dull, so I subconsciously got up and walked towards him, and when he was in front of him, he grabbed his shoulder and was at the side, and then I saw a little warmth in his eyes. All of this happened so naturally that I suddenly felt strange and embarrassed when I looked at the Dao Fei.
At this time, Gu Xi still looked at me sideways and asked, "What were you thinking just now?" ”
I'm thinking...... How to say it at this time, I had to shake my head, "It's nothing, I'm distracted." ”
"Let's go, then."
Walk? I asked blankly, "Where are you going?" Gu Xi smiled, "You still plan to stay here forever?" Of course not, but ...... "Are you getting better?" From the moment he came back from the shaking god just now, he saw that he had stood up from the ground, and there was no discomfort in his expression, but the moment of despair and sorrow before was not far away, he only had a heartbeat and no pulse, even if he was revived later, how could he recover in such a short time?
Gu Xi's reply was: "I have enough strength to pick you up." After saying that, he really moved his palm to my waist, and quickly spun to dodge, he hooked his lips and looked at Dao Fei: "Lead the way." ”
Dao Fei glanced at me lightly and turned his back and left.
I don't know what they communicated in the shaking just now, but I think the confrontation atmosphere is still there, but it is a little different. Dao Fei approached the phoenix wood, and before I could see it clearly, I saw him disappear into the fiery red, and his heart was empty in an instant, and he almost ran over quickly. It was only when I saw that there was a crevice under the flaming red leaves that people could get into, and it turned out that there was a hidden road here. The mountain crevasse is narrow, and you need to turn your body sideways to pass through.
Dao Fei was the first to enter, and there was no longer a figure in sight, and I walked in the middle, and Gu Xi was behind.
One thing I noticed during the walk was that this crack in the mountain was not original, but more like it had just been dug up. The air smelled of earth and dampness, and there were even new scratches on the walls of the mountains that clung to the body.
I glanced at Gu Xi behind me, and his eyes told me that I had noticed it. The mountain crevice is longer than we thought, especially the twists and turns, and the distance between the three people in front and back can almost only be analyzed from the footsteps. Dao Fei walked relatively fast, and I almost didn't see him from beginning to end, and I could only tell that he was still there from his footsteps relatively far away.
Inexplicably listening to the footsteps has a sense of peace of mind at this moment.
After about fifteen minutes of walking, I was already starting to feel stunned if this mountain crack ...... If you don't dig it, how long will it take to dig it up? After walking for another five minutes, I suddenly saw a long-lost light shining through the twisting vertices.
For those who have been immersed in darkness for a long time, the surprise cannot be suppressed. I couldn't help but speed up the pace under my feet, but because the gap was too narrow, I moved quickly and scratched against the angular and convex mountain wall, and my hands were immediately scratched out.
When I really looked around the turning point and saw the white light outside the slit, the abrasion just now was forgotten. The moment you step out, the intuitive and open vision, the empty and natural breathing, many depressions become less important in an instant.
I have been struggling with illusions in the belly of the mountain, and when I really walked out of the mountain and came to an empty valley, I could see the sky when I looked up, and I felt better than before, and my mood suddenly brightened.
Turning his head to look for Gu Xi behind him, his eyes glanced at a certain place and paused. Just now, I couldn't see clearly in the darkness with only the light of the flashlight, but at this time, under the blue sky and white light, I saw that the wide black robe was covered with mud, and even the shoes on my feet could no longer see the original color, all of them were covered in mud. Again, I was startled when he walked away, and without thinking about it, I blurted out, "What's wrong with your leg?" ”
The figure paused, but it didn't reply to me, and when I started again, I couldn't see a slight limp. And my heart is sour, and the once intimate blood relationship is only a blank distance and indifference.
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