December 5, 2007

It's raining in your city, and I'd love to ask if you have an umbrella, but I don't, because I'm afraid you can't do anything about it if you say no, just like I love you but can't give you company.

It was raining in Lincheng, and it was raining for three days, and my mood was as low and damp as the fallen leaves that had been beaten by frost. I read the weather forecast in Yanzhou, and it's raining there too, right? After work, I kept an umbrella in my bag as usual, but I didn't want to hit it, probably because I thought that if I did you might not have an umbrella, forgive my childish and little prayers, I hope you brought an umbrella.

December 6, 2007

I love the flowers in spring, the wind in summer, the dusk in autumn, the warm sun in winter, and you all year round. When a woman's mouth repeatedly appears a man's name, whether it's praising that man or scolding that man, the subtext is that I love him.

Before I knew it, my diary was full of your name again, and I still can't quit if I forgive me.

Last night I dreamed again, dreaming of us who used to be silently embraced in the mountains and forests, and you standing on the top of the mountain said to me with a golden face: I like you.

December 7, 2007

I was also by your side with all my blood, but then I didn't have that kind of persistence and necessity.

Oh, it's our breakup anniversary, forgive me for having to keep such a frivolous little thing in my mind. You and her should be happy, right? Well, from now on, please be strong in the city without me, and I will heal in the city without you.

December 8, 2007

If one day you can come into my heart, you will surely shed tears, because it is full of my thoughts for you; If one day I can walk into your heart, I will definitely cry! Because it doesn't matter if it's full of yours.

Today I revisited Stephen Chow's big talk Journey to the West, and Fairy Zixia left a tear there when she walked into the heart of the Supreme Treasure. I think if I could get into your heart, I might be left with countless tears because our script was destined to be a tragedy from the start.

December 11, 2007

From being so good to having you to being okay without you, how do you know the sadness and hardship in between.

I deliberately didn't keep a diary for two days because I was so sad, but the heartache didn't stop. I thought I had quit the habit of thinking about you, but why is this habit still so stubborn and paranoid? I'm so angry and sad, and I'm not willing to give in, but after every struggle, I'm powerless. I thought I had shed all the tears I needed to shed for the rest of my life since we broke up, and it seemed that the end was far from reached.

December 12, 2007

Please don't look at me from your point of view, I'm afraid you won't understand.

When I suddenly saw this sentence today, I thought about it in my head, as if you never understood me. The last thing I said to you when we met the last time I met was that I hated you, in fact, just look at the tears in the corners of my eyes, you should think that in fact, what I want to express is that I love you.

I still remember not long after the breakup, I deliberately texted you to tell you that I was with my new boyfriend, and suddenly I felt so naïve. I wanted to use such a lie to sting you, but in front of you who didn't care, all I got was ridiculous and pathetic sourness.

December 13, 2007

In order to meet you in this life, I have already left room in my previous life.

If there is no fate, how can we meet; If there is fate, why is the ending always teary-eyed?

I don't have anything to say today, I'm in a bad mood, that's all I have to say.

December 14, 2007

Don't tell me I'm sorry, I'm sorry can only be exchanged for your peace of mind, not my relief.

Hehe, I've never heard you say that to me? Well, everything is my fault.

December 15, 2007

Goodbye, goodbye means never to see again.

Even if I want to say goodbye, it is difficult to meet two people without fate even in the same city. I was listening to Penny's blessing on the street corner, and I was imagining in my mind the scene where you and I would meet again years later.

How many autumns and how many winters I almost get healed

But I still don't want to bother myself just because of a repeating topic

I also thought about how it would be good if we really met us

I think I'm going to stand on a street corner and not let you see it

Just because I don't want to bother, just because I'm afraid you won't be able to explain

It's just because she is more important than I am in your eyes right now

I had to pretend I couldn't see you and she hugging across the street

I can feel your happiness

It's a good way for everyone

I had to pretend I couldn't hear it

I can't hear what others say about her

I don't want to ask anymore, and I don't want to be notified to your world anyway

If you don't want to ask, if you don't want to be notified, leave the blessing on the street corner

Tonight is for fantasy, for sentimentality.

December 16, 2007

It's the weekend, and I'm sitting in bed reading Baby Anne's book. I always like to read her writings, sentimental with a bit of decadent beauty. Maybe I have masochistic tendencies, as if only tears can awaken memories, memories about you. Now I don't allow myself to think of you anytime and anywhere, only in the moment of journaling I allow myself to indulge.

Baby Anne said: Feelings are sometimes just a matter of one person. Nothing to do with anyone. To love, or not to love, is self-sufficient.

I think that's what I'm doing, but I'm surprised at how long it is, but there's nothing I can do about it.

You seem to have drained most of my passion and disappointment. It made me lose most of my ability to love people.

If I had known you were so lethal, I shouldn't have come near you. I'm so conflicted, I've struggled between regret and no regret for a long time and haven't come up with an answer.

I think I really liked you, both in the past and now. It's just that it's just me after all.

24 December 2007

It's Christmas Eve, and I've written a letter you'll never receive, huh it's silly, right?

Hi：

You okay? Are you still staying in Yanzhou? Oh, maybe! Yanzhou is a good place, good mountains, good water, and good stories. You used to be my story, but unfortunately, now you can't get into my story anymore, and so do I. The saddest thing is that I can no longer go to the places where I have memories, and the cities with you should not be where I go. I used to be determined to stay in Yanzhou, that humanized city, the city full of my love. Is there him, is there him, or is there him? It doesn't matter, without you, my dream of love would be over, why bother with so many people or things that are useless?

On the first day of college in Yanzhou, you said you were going to pick me up, but I rejected you at that time, but after that, I fell into your world, painful and happy. On the first day of the date, in the cold of February, you took me to ride around the entire West Lake several times, and your hands were cold but your heart was warm. The second time, it was halfway to Guiren Peak, I couldn't breathe with a bad heart, and you were so worried about holding me. The third time was to throw a coin on the Hupao Spring, saying that he would re-verify his feelings after a year of love. The fourth time was on the campus after the snow, a white layer of snow, so beautiful! I'm so happy to step on your footprints. The fifth time was on the Internet all night.,It's a pity that I'm so stupid to play CS together.,In the future, when I propose to play CS with you again, you refuse.。 The sixth time, still in the West Lake, after two hours of cold wind, I caught a cold, immediately became dumb, my throat could not make a sound at all, Hello naughty on the bus has been singing quirky songs, teasing me, but unfortunately I can only write on the palm of your hand. When I went back, I sat on the tour bus, it was so cold, but I snuggled up to you all the time, and your chest was so warm. The seventh time was on the basketball court, you love basketball and can play handsome, and you don't even have a chance to get the ball when you bully me.

I can't remember how many times, sometimes you are like my brother, always blaming me for being too stupid and too lost; Sometimes you are like my brother, you always want to be coquettish to me, and after eating, your mouth is dirty like a child, and you want me to wipe it; Sometimes you are friends again, and you talk to me about life, the economy, the future, and men and women. Of course, most of the time you are my boyfriend, and you have to take on the mission of coaxing me, pleasing me, helping me with my homework and listening to my commands. You are a very treacherous person, every time you order food for dinner, you will pretend to be a gentleman and ask a lady to order, and when I propose to order one, you will say which one is better, disturbing my train of thought, and in the end, you generally order what you like to eat, and I only have one dish or two dishes to decide. You're still a food king, and you've had a record of eating four burgers. The most hateful thing is that you always see an expensive car, you shout pressure, and then take me to self-study seriously, and usually you don't do it for half an hour and then give up.

You always say that you are very hard, always want to coax me, you also say that I have a very bad temper, speak very badly, and the most important thing is that you say that my personality was gentle like water at first, and then arrogant like a man's wife, which makes you unbearable, you also say that in Yanzhou, I am your most important person. He also said that the mountains in Yanzhou are too short, and you have to take me to climb Mount Tai. You have said too much, hehe, in fact, what you said is more: I have a disagreement with your personality, there are too many quarrels, and you may be friends for a long time. I smiled and refused! Why? Love is love, if you don't love, you don't love, and it's not good to love or break up? So I have been insisting on doing this, loving very hard, controlling very domineeringly, trying very hard to redeem, and I can't help but hurt very hard。。。。。。

After going through so much and then it seems to be back to the beginning, I have the impression that he used to sing the song of the pig, the English singer who slipped away, the one who walked with a straight back and looked very cute, the one with a big head and a bad smile。。。。。。 Now I am used to living without him, simple, plain, without much joy or sorrow. It's just that when I think of him by chance, I also bless, and I wonder, is he still like that? Is he happier than me? And will he still believe in love after he has experienced me? Maybe, who am I to him? Who is he to me? Hehe! For him, I may have been one of the girlfriends he once dated, and he became the only one in my relationship after dating. Sometimes I hate my fragility, don't you claim to know how to love? Didn't you say that you should live happier than him? Hehe!

It is the right way to think that memories should be dusty, and people often open their memories as a way to be relieved after they are relieved. Your existence is no longer my resurrection, allowing you to be happier than me! Please be happier than me! Forget the pain, although in the final separation said that I will never forgive you, but the memory of you has long been betrayed by myself, I can't remember how bad you are, what is left is good. Relieved! The love for you has been very quiet.,To exchange for the care you occasionally give.,It's obviously a movie of three people.,And I haven't been able to have a name.。。。。 Remember this song, it used to be our favorite! It didn't exist anymore, hehe! Leave Yanzhou to you, and I'm going to continue my story in another city! See you soon! Goodbye is also indefinite!