Bai Yaer continued: "But you know, what changes people's fate is often just a small thing that seems extremely ordinary at the time. For example, a physical examination, a phone call. Can you investigate this kind of detail? ”

I shook my head.

"It was an autumn afternoon, and it was very hot anyway, but my boyfriend came back from a business trip abroad in those days, and I was in a good mood after a long absence.

"At that time, just after a meeting, his phone called, and I thought he wanted to make an appointment for lunch, so I quickly walked to a secluded place around the corner and happily answered the phone. But his voice was very heavy, and he said that he went to the hospital a few days ago for a check-up, and the results were very bad.

"In fact, two months ago, he felt a lot of pain under the sternum, so after returning to China, he went to a major hospital for a check-up. After being examined, he was told that he had a rare form of hyperplasia. In layman's terms, the doctor said, this is a type of cancer.

He said this in tears on the phone. He said that the hospital judged that the cancer was not yet at an early stage, so he had to be hospitalized. We were already panicking, and when things got to that point, our heads were hot, and we didn't care so much.

"He was quickly admitted to the hospital, and then he was examined and chemotherapy over and over again, and the money was really like running water. Both of us had a very ordinary family background, because our parents were not in good health and were in the early stage of their illness, so we had to carry it down by ourselves at that time, and we didn't tell anyone about it - what was the use of talking about it?

"In just two months, we spent all our savings. He is a good person, and he is afraid of dragging me down, so he must break up with me, but I firmly disagree. It took another month, I was on the verge of a breakdown, and we cried and hugged for the last time in the hospital.

"Before he came in, he was still a handsome young man, but he didn't expect that in just three months, his hair would fall out, his face would be full of wrinkles, and he would be drowsy, and he would not have any energy.

"I left crying, deleted all his contact information, left the company, and broke off with him completely. Although the pressure of the breakup was reduced instantly, I still couldn't accept it psychologically, and I felt that I was a deserter from fate.

"I lost my direction in life, and I felt that no matter how hard people struggle, in the end, a small invisible cell could easily knock you down. I took my last month's salary and went to Zhuhai and then to Macau.

"In the Macau casino, I exchanged that money for chips and tried to play a few handfuls of baccarat, but I was unexpectedly lucky, and the chips in my hand doubled in succession, and the gamblers around me looked at me with great envy - that night, I seemed to have regained the meaning of life......

"What happened later, needless to say, you also guessed it, nine out of ten bets lost, and nine out of 100 bets lost. After returning to Shenzhen, I began to gamble online again and again, because only when I was gambling could I feel the motivation to live - unwilling to lose, still want to win if I win, want to live forever, make up for the sky, go ashore, and more......

"That's it, I completely fell into the sea of gambling."

I sighed, "Understood. ”

She burst out laughing.

"Understand! Who do you think you are, can you still understand and anticipate life? ”

She continued to laugh, not loud, but magical. I was afraid that Wen Tingxu would hear it, so I hurriedly went over and closed the door.

"After two years, I finally turned over the big one and paid back some money, and I wanted to grit my teeth and go ashore. I bought a plane ticket to Bali for a walk, but unfortunately I met a female colleague in the pool.

"I wanted to get out of the way, but the pool was so small that I couldn't avoid it, so I had to talk to her in embarrassment. Who knew she was so enthusiastic that she had to treat me to a cocktail.

We chatted for a few moments, and she suddenly mentioned my ex-boyfriend. She laughed and said that the man was an unlucky one. I still felt uncomfortable in my heart, because counting his illness, it is estimated that the person is gone.

But she laughed, she said, he was unlucky to be misdiagnosed by the hospital, not cancer but misdiagnosed as cancer, not to mention the end of the road, and was also confused and underwent chemotherapy for half a year.

"I was stupid at the time - the disease that broke our lives was just a misdiagnosis?! She continued to drink and said, but bad luck came to an end, and the man sued the hospital and ended up taking a large sum of money in the settlement.

In the process of defending his rights, he also met a girl, and now the two have bought a house in Shenzhen, got married, and heard that they are about to have children. She also asked me, is life ironic?

I sat across from her as if I had been torn out. She crossed her legs, half-lying on a white chair blowing the sea breeze and drinking a mojito through a straw. The setting sun in Bali hovers over the sea level, glowing red as if it were an atomic bomb. That's right, my mind was empty, as empty as the world after the nuclear explosion. ”

When she said this, she turned her head out of the window. The sky there flickered endlessly.

"So as soon as I got back home, I started gambling again. If you lose, you borrow money, and if you win, you spend it all - how do people know what will happen tomorrow?

"Of course, when I was at the end of the road, I would hide outside for half a month and dare not go home, for fear that the landlord would urge me to pay for rent; will also wear a famous brand, be dizzy with hunger, and pick up other people's leftover fries at McDonald's to eat; will also gamble in order to borrow money, and will not hesitate to agree to all the requests of others.

"Of course, sometimes I take risks and commit serious crimes. But these are nothing, I just want to squander this short few decades of life, not necessarily to fool around, but to do a project to the extreme, and finish the kind of ...... that throws off and leaves."

The faster she spoke, the faster I spoke, and I had to interrupt her.

"So, this time to trick Wen Tingxu into the desert and let others rob and kill people, is also your so-called project?"

"yes, it's fun, it's so challenging—there's nothing more enjoyable than fooling one of the smartest people in the world." She pulled open the drawer, took out a piece of paper and handed it to me, "Unfortunately, this project was not done.

"I originally wanted to resign early after I came back, and the resignation application was written and signed, but in the end I was still unwilling and wanted to lie to him again, but you were caught in the end. However, you tried your best, but you only found the result, and all the judgments in the process were wrong, which can be regarded as shit luck. ”

I was a little embarrassed by her.

"Tell me, then, where was the misjudgment?"

"Hahaha," she laughed, "yes, you're right, I'm just a pawn crossing the river, but who let me cross the river?" ”