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A green-skinned train, through the morning light and light fog, whistled slowly past the railroad tracks outside the window. The clear glass windows of the small restaurant also seemed to be shaken, making a crisp sound. Even the ground beneath his feet trembled slightly with the rumbling of the train.

Bu Shiren suddenly heard Xia Xue's question, and he was unprepared, and he was choked for a while. The meat he had just brought to his mouth was burned and stopped in the air, his mouth half-open. He looked at Xia Xue in a daze, after so many years, Xia Xue asked him this kind of question for the first time.

Is that the woman you have in the Golden House the same woman who came to me? The last time she ran to the door of the company, she told me that you have been living with her for many years, and you still refuse to marry her. She suspected that I was playing in the way. If the woman behind you is her, and now that your goal has been achieved, why don't you keep your promise to marry her? She said that you promised her that you would marry her as soon as the company became your own one day. Xia Xue saw that Bu Shiren was slow to speak, and repeated her question again.

Ah, Xia Xue, I thought you didn't know about it. I'm ashamed to say that the woman I went to find behind your back was the woman you saw at the door of the company. Back then, I was singing in a bar, and she went to the store to apply for a singer. That's it, we got to know each other. At that time, she had just graduated from college and couldn't find a suitable job. Her father has been hospitalized for almost many years and needs a lot of medical expenses, so she wants to come to the bar to sing and look for opportunities for development by the way.

Bu Shiren put down the fire in his hand and looked out the window blankly. After a moment's pause, he continued to recount the past.

When I first met her, I was fascinated by her purity and beauty. Coupled with the fact that we are connected by the same fate, we feel pity and pity for each other. I pursued her desperately, giving her all the money I earned to help her treat her father. When we go out to eat beef noodles, I always ask her a big bowl of meat, and I only add coriander to my own portion.

In order to save on rent, she moved to my accommodation. It is a village bungalow, no heating, no air conditioning. In winter, a water tank placed in the yard will form a thick layer of ice. In the summer, the house is like a steamer, and it is difficult to sleep all night.

When it was difficult, we used a big pot of water and cooked only one packet of instant noodles, she ate the noodles and I drank the soup. When she wasn't at home, I would eat pickle gnocchi and nibble on shriveled steamed buns. The sofas, tables and chairs at home were picked up by us from the garbage heap outside. We gave all the money we earned to the hospital, but despite this, it was still a drop in the bucket.

In spring, the willows begin to sprout. I took a long stick with a sickle tied to the tip of the stick and went out to pick the delicate willow leaves. I blanch the willow leaves I picked home, blanch them in boiling water, and then mix them with a simple condiment. When you eat it, you will feel a slight bitterness on the tip of your tongue, but it is much more delicious than the pickle gnocchi that you eat all day.

Eggs were too expensive, so I went to the bean-growing fields to catch bean worms in order to give her protein. She was afraid of the appearance of bean worms and did not dare to eat them. I washed the bean worms, turned them over, and fried them in oil for her to eat.

No matter five winters or six summers, I went to catch the sea and got clams and sea red for her to eat. I often ride my motorcycle to the pier dozens of kilometers away before dawn to pick up the small fish and shrimp thrown away from the boat. Sometimes, if you are lucky, you can even pick up small tongue fish and yellow croaker.

But she always complained that life was too miserable and disgusted that I had no ability. I don't blame her at all. A beautiful and innocent girl like her deserves the best life. I sang desperately and kept making money, just to take the sorrow off her face.

But one day, she suddenly stopped coming home. For several days, there was no news. Half a month later, she called me and said that she was on a good relationship with a medical representative. In this way, she can buy cheap injections for her father. Moreover, the medical representative is very familiar with the doctor, and he will be particularly concerned about his father's condition. I tried my best to keep her, but she decisively refused.

About half a year later, in the middle of the night, she ran back to my apartment. That night, it was raining heavily outside. When I opened the door, she was drenched in rain and dripping down her head, hugging her shoulders and shivering.

I found her dry clothes and a towel, she dried her hair, changed her clothes, and stayed. At night, she lay in my arms and cried incessantly. She said the medical representative thought she was short and didn't want her. The medical representative was only 1.5 meters tall, so he wanted to find a woman who was very tall, saying that it was for the sake of future generations.

She stayed in my little house for two months. I took care of her as always, knowing that she would have to leave sooner or later. Sure enough, I came home from work one day and didn't see her. She took all her belongings with her. I have a hunch that once she leaves this time, she probably won't be able to come back.

Since then, she hasn't been back or called me. I loved her so strongly in my heart that I could barely live without her. Just because I was poor and couldn't give her the life she wanted, she had to wander into a homeless place. I don't hate her, I just blame myself for being too incompetent, and just a little bit, she can become my woman.

Then, after a few years, I had a company and made a lot of money, and she unexpectedly appeared in front of me. She said that she heard the owner of the bar say, I didn't go to the bar to sing for a long time, and now I have soared.

After I was able to get out of poverty, my lover came uninvited. I looked at her who was still beautiful and moving, and my mood was indescribably complicated, without too many surprises, but I felt like my heart was pricked by a needle.

She said that the last time she said goodbye was to go to a stationmaster she met in a small town bar. The middle-aged man, gave her a lot of money and gave her a house to live in. It's just that he has more than one woman.

Even, a local woman gave birth to his child, a boy, who looked exactly like the stationmaster. The woman's husband was a subordinate of the stationmaster, so he was promoted to his position and taken care of by the division of the house.

A few years later, the stationmaster was implicated in a bribery case involving wagons. The procuratorate pulled out the radish and brought out the mud, and investigated and dealt with many, many cases of corruption and bribery of the stationmaster. In the end, the stationmaster was sentenced and put in prison.

It turned out that this was the reason why she came back to me. I was as obsessed with her face and body as ever. But my heart is getting farther and farther away from her. She offered to marry me and take a stake in our company. I bought her a car, a bag, and a house, but I couldn't satisfy her.

I grew disgusted with her, but I couldn't let go of her body. I would often burn her body with cigarette butts in moments of burning passion, deriving deadly pleasure from her screams of pain.

I can't tell, I left her by my side out of revenge for my past frustrations? Or do I like to torture her for the satisfaction of vanity? Or maybe I desperately want her to see how powerful and rich I am, and make her regret for the rest of her life for her contempt for me.

Only I know how ugly my heart is.

Xia Xue, the person I'm most sorry for is you. Bu Shiren finally finished recounting the past affairs and let out a long sigh. I'm a brute, using your money to achieve my ambitions, but I'm duplicitous to you, and I'm messing with that vain woman who worships money behind my back!

I did promise her that when the company became mine, I would give her the shares of the company. When the time comes, he will marry her in style.

But today, I can't bear her greed anymore. I don't want to accommodate her anymore, let alone be her money-making machine, I'm tired of her body. She didn't have any money to attract me and make me work for her.

In my heart, I have no feelings of love for her for a long time. In the middle of the night, I would suddenly remember her affection for me, and I would be haunted by the pain.

Xia Xue, I told you everything I could think of in the past today. I dare not beg for your forgiveness, but I hope you will not forsake me. When you first came to work at the bar, the woman had just left me. From that time on, it was difficult for me to trust women anymore, let alone show sincerity to women.

At that time, when I heard you talk about what happened in the past, I expected that Xue Han would come back to you sooner or later. From this, you will not be short of money, and you will be able to get help at any time as long as you want.

Xia Xue looked at Bu Shiren with deep eyes. Today's him is probably the most honest in his life. Between men and women, without the bond of promise, they will become open to each other.

In the endless desert of time, each takes its own path, does not have to bear each other's birth, old age, sickness and death, and avoids the inner entanglement of evading responsibility. The separation from each other becomes another form of gathering. The farewell of the past has become a foreshadowing of the counterattack of love.

Xia Xue finished eating the breakfast in front of her, looked at Bu Shiren, and said quietly. Actually, after all, you have loved her for so many years, why don't you want to marry her now? It's not easy for her, she's been following you for so many years, and she's not young now. If you don't marry her again, how will you let her live the rest of her life?

He leaned back in his chair, lit a cigarette, and put it between his lips and inhaled it gently. I was going to give her a name, too. But you know it now. She was clever enough to hook up with the old gold man and instigate the old gold to sabotage my business.

This woman, if she just doesn't have a brain, I will admit it. But her heart is too dirty and dark, and she has no moral bottom line for money. Therefore, I can't marry such a woman back home no matter what.

She brought everything on herself, and she couldn't blame me. You cannot live if you have done your own iniquity. I asked myself, worthy of her, but I couldn't clean up the mess of her life for her.

After Bu Shiren finished speaking, he stood up and said to Xia Xue, you are also full, let's go!

Walking out of the hotel, there was a black BMW, which drove to the side of Bu Shiren and Xia Xue and stopped. Bu Shiren opened the car door and said, "Get in the car, I'll let the driver come."

Xia Xue got into the car and soon arrived at the door of the residence. Xia Xue got out of the car, waved at Bu Shiren, and said thank you.

Xia Xue reached out and tugged at the collar and the shirt attached to her back. In the morning, I fought the basketball court and sweated profusely. At this moment, when the wind blows, I feel that my body is cold, and it is very uncomfortable to be wet. She walked quickly to the door and eagerly pulled out the key, wishing she could take a hot shower right away.

Suddenly, a pair of big hands came from behind Xia Xue and clamped her in her arms.