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When she was still a teenager, she witnessed his loneliness. This person is lonely from beginning to end, but people will not get used to loneliness just because they are lonely all the time. On the contrary, many people are just used to being alone, but deep down they are very afraid of loneliness. When you are alone, you think a lot, including Zhu Xinzhi.

After so many years of hammering and pondering, she can be regarded as slowly touching a little bit of Zhu Xinzhi's thoughts.

Why doesn't he like himself, probably, he is a witness to his gray years, he can't like it.

Thinking of this, Pei Xie Tang never mentioned the past again.

She worked hard to do a good job in front of her, as long as she came back, she would not let Zhu Xinzhi stay alone. He is an official in the court, and it stands to reason that he is busy making friends with a lot of people who are the prince of Huai'an. But Zhu Xinzhi didn't have any friends, he couldn't distinguish between sincerity and good and evil, she was always worried that he would be deceived, so she carefully selected and helped him find a few people he could befriend. was afraid that he would not come out, and deliberately used some conspiracy, which made him hook up with others. These people, all of whom are now in high positions, can also be regarded as a credit to her.

Time is fast.

In a blink of an eye, it is the twenty-first year of Xuanqing.

It has been four years since she said that she was going to marry Zhu Xinzhi. In the past four years, he has been lukewarm, and when he is happy, he will take the initiative to invite her to dinner and go on a wild trip, and when he is unhappy, he will have a straight face and write the appearance that no one should enter.

This year, Bae Yongjun passed away.

She became the master of the Tai'an Royal Mansion and became the lord of Tai'an.

On the day of Pei Yongjun's funeral, Emperor Xuanqing personally went out of the palace and came to bid farewell to the backbone of Donglu with hundreds of civil and military officials, he stood behind Emperor Xuanqing, and when she raised her eyes, she saw him full of distressed eyes. She smiled, the daughter of the Pei family didn't cry, even if she was infinitely sad, she couldn't collapse or fall down in front of the civil and military officials and the people who saw them off on the street. But when she was helping Ling, her steps still staggered, and it was at that moment that Zhu Xinzhi came out of the crowd and held her elbow.

He quickly retracted his hand, as if he was doing something incredibly normal.

But so many pairs of eyes, her strangeness, only he noticed.

How could she believe that it was all unintentional?

With that help, she finally gave her heart away.

In the past, Pei Yongjun asked her countless times what kind of person she wanted to be with her, and at that moment, Pei Xie Tang found the answer.

What she wants is someone who can support her when she needs to rely on.

And the support he gave was actually not just a little bit of help.

And many more.

She was in charge of the Tai'an Palace at the beginning, with the cold bronze army in her hands, and she had many years of experience in the army, so she seemed to be able to catch it, but only she knew how much effort was going on behind it. In the first two months of becoming the head of the First Army, she hardly slept much. There are too many things in all aspects, and she has to stay up until midnight to deal with them. She was born intelligent, but she was no match for the impermanence of the world. As soon as Pei Yongjun died, the Northern Wei Dynasty immediately made a comeback, although she expected that before the event, she still felt that she had more than enough heart and not enough strength.

That's when he went to the Northwest once.

In the name of escorting grain and grass.

He has grown rapidly in recent years and has become a good hand at handling government affairs. She was busy fighting, so he helped adjust some military affairs. The army quickly worked together, he ensured the stability of her rear, and only left calmly from the northwest after she had inflicted heavy losses on the Northern Wei Dynasty and had time to breathe.

She said goodbye to him, on the loess slope outside the city of Jiling, she stood outside the carriage, he sat in the carriage, she rubbed the loess on her toes and asked: "Xinzhi, don't you like me?" Why? ”

"You don't have to think too much about it." He replied.

She chuckled, "But I don't think so." ”

He muffled his voice, and after a moment he told the coachman to depart.

It was no different from every time he talked about it before, but for some reason, Pei Xie Tang had an indescribable feeling in his heart.

Pei Yongjun's death is not only sad for Pei Xie Tang, but also a beautiful aunt who is pregnant with Liujia in the house, who is a woman as soft as water, and only she can comfort her. She was fighting in the northwest, and what she was most worried about was Aunt Mei, for fear that if she couldn't think about it for a while, she would follow Pei Yongjun, and at that time, she really didn't know if she would go crazy.

However, after dealing with everything and returning to Beijing, Aunt Mei held her stomach for nine months and said to her with a smile: "My heart is finally steady." In the days when you are not in the house, the prince always tells me not to worry, but where can I let go of my heart? ”

Only then did she know that it turned out that Zhu Xinzhi was helping her take care of the Tai'an Palace.

On the first night of returning to Beijing, she went to the Huai'an palace with a wine jug.

Zhu Xinzhi looked at her helplessly, and in the end, she was unconscious. She wanted to take down this person, and planned to cook raw rice and cook rice, so that he could not retreat.

But he didn't let her go.

There is no other reason, he drinks too much, and he can't get up.

So I had no choice but to give up.

She took off her clothes and lay down beside him, Zhu Xinzhi's alcohol was good, he was drunk, she naturally drank a lot, she asked drunkly: "Xinzhi, you don't like me, why do you want to be good to me?" Do you know that there are many people in this world who want me to die, and if you protect me like this, some people will treat you as a thorn in the side. ”

He said in a daze, "With me, you'll be fine." ”

She smiled: "Then you marry me." ”

"I can't marry you." He replied.

She nudged him: "Why? ”

But he ignored her anymore and rolled over and fell asleep.

Pei Xie Tang was stunned for a while, and then quickly fell asleep. When she woke up the next day, he was gone, and she had to go home in disgrace.

After that, it was the palace banquet of the twenty-first year of Xuanqing.

She was keenly aware of the change in the direction of the wind in the middle of the court, and no longer protected him openly and secretly, but she unwittingly provoked a new enemy. Her eyeliner in the capital told her that someone always tried to destroy her rear, this person was clever, her spies could not find clues, so she was careful to beware, she laughed and ignored it, with Zhu Xinzhi, she would be safe and sound.

Because of the drunkenness that night, he promised her: "With me, you will be fine." ”

She trusted him so much.

Then, it is the palace banquet of the twenty-second year of Xuanqing.

Then, she killed someone and went to prison, and then, someone told her that it was Zhu Xinzhi who set up this game, and she pestered him for six years, and all grievances and grievances should be over.

Then, upstairs in Xuanjiao, he brought her a glass of poisoned wine.

She drank it all.

She didn't tell him that she had been sleepless all night since she saw her again on the Xuanjiao Tower last night, and she couldn't figure out why he had to kill her, and she couldn't figure out why he had to kill her because he was obviously affectionate to her. She didn't want to believe that everything was self-inflicted, and she couldn't believe it. She couldn't figure out why he could still treat her like before with so much resentment in his heart.

In the end, she had to believe that she was the one who had been stupid all along.

He is the one who pretends to be the best.

She didn't want to think about it, in fact, since she approached him, the benefits she brought him were innumerable, at least, it helped him gain a firm foothold in the most difficult years, and helped him get the virtuous man he wanted.

She didn't want to believe that he was using her.

Of course, what she couldn't figure out the most was why he just didn't want to believe that she really liked him. In that case, she said it countless times, and everyone believed it, why was he the only one who didn't believe it......

When he confronted her, "Why do you do so many wrong things?" At that time, she actually thought back to the most wrong thing she did was to like him. But after enduring it, she finally endured it, and said those words in her usual tone: I said that I liked the prince, and after six years, the prince didn't believe it; I said that I was going to die alone, it was very lonely, and the prince didn't believe it; Then I said that I didn't do any of this, and the prince didn't believe it if he wanted to. The prince asked me if I was okay with my father, and I felt a little sorry, but not because of these, but because I couldn't keep his posthumous son. That's all.

She never mentioned Zhu Xinzhi.

The moment she closed her eyes, she hated.

She can't do the past like the wind.

The world says that love can't be reciprocated, but she is really unwilling, she has paid too much, and all she gets is a use, a deception and a killing, how can she be willing?

So, she was born again.

When she touched her living body, the most fanatical thought that welled up in her heart was to find Zhu Xinzhi, and then take revenge on him and return all the wounds he had sent her one by one!

She tried to get closer, carefully designed, and he gradually got into the trap, but in the end, the truth deviated from her original understanding. She was confused and shaken, and she originally had the intention of growing old with him, but in an instant, with Chen Ke's death, it came to naught. Only then did she realize that he really hated her, and he wished that her soul would be gone......

In this affair, she was too tired and bitter.

Pei Xie Tang closed his eyes tiredly, and only opened them after a long time to look at Qi Meng: "Ameng, if you are me, can you still stay by the prince's side, pretend that nothing happened, when everything is quiet, is it okay?" ”

Qi Meng looked at her distressedly and shook his head slowly.

If it were her, I was afraid that she would give up in the first year.

The smile on Pei Xie Tang's face was big: "yes, so, I didn't do anything wrong, right?" ”

Qi Meng nodded.

Pei Xie Tang smiled and smiled, his shoulders suddenly collapsed, and the smile on his face was very lonely: "However, when I made this decision, none of them supported me, and even Gao Xingzhi was against it at the beginning." He felt that I should stay, give birth to Zhu Xinzhi's child, and then cut everything off so that I could leave clearly. ”

"Gao Gongzi is a good person." Qi Meng said from the bottom of his heart: "County Lord, in the future, will you be with him?" ”

"He doesn't like me again." Pei Xie Tang replied.

But before she could finish speaking, she suddenly fell silent.

The box of things that Gao Xingzhi hid under the bed, where is something that people who don't like can do?

Qi Meng looked at her with disgust, and seemed to think that she had said something stupid and stupid.