"What if I say I don't want to?" The corners of Li's lips trembled slightly, and he didn't look at Chen Shao, but looked at the fan intently, as if he was writing the answer on the rain-swept azure thin silk between the lattice.

"What if I say I do?" She asked again, a smile overflowed on her lips, desolate and thin, and dispersed in a blink of an eye: "If I say I don't want to, will you really leave our family behind, leave forever, and never come back?" ”

"Yes." Chen Shao said, without a trace of hesitation, but his face was as pale as Li's: "I have something I want to do." Not so long ago, though, I had some hesitation. However, after careful investigation, I realized that it was actually my obsession in this life. And, there are some things that have changed, and what I don't want to happen, won't happen. And the only thing I can do, or what I can do now, is to leave. ”

"Oh, really?" Li Shiwu looked at the fan, and bent upwards at the corner of Chen Shao's lips: "Master, I really have great ambitions." The concubine is such a little woman, but she really has long hair and short knowledge, and she can't understand it a little. ”

Chen Shao looked at her, and in the eyes that were reflected by the candlelight, the residual warmth was still there.

"Zhenzhen, I can only tell you so much." He said.

The extremely clear and harmonious voice is that someone strokes the piano by the bamboo forest in the cool moon, and three or two string tones come by the moon and go away through the wind.

Lee did not speak.

She sat there as if she had never existed, her god and her soul gone, her only body, like a clay sculpture of wood, sitting stiffly in her chair, and even the drooping sleeves were stiff as stone.

"What if...... Zhen Zhen really doesn't want to go with me, I won't be stronger than you. Chen Shao looked at her for a while, slowly lowered his head, and lowered his voice: "You can rest assured about this." ”

He smiled suddenly, a trace of memory quickly crossed his face, raised his head slightly, and looked at a candlestick on the side: "On the night of marriage...... I told you that in this life, in this life, I Chen Shao am willing to hold hands with you for the rest of my life, and I will never be disappointed, and I will not force you to do anything you don't want to do. This sentence has not changed so far, and it will never change in the future. ”

"Bang", a light burst on the candlestick, and the instant burning and brightening, like a tiny firework blooming in the night sky.

"But," Chen Shao turned his words and looked at Li, and suddenly, his eyes seemed to contain the warmest lake water in spring, spreading to her: "I hope that Zhenzhen will walk with me, only because of this life, you are the person I am willing to pay with my life." If you're not there, I'd like to ...... I will be alone. ”

He laughed quickly.

Lonely, sad, desolate.

It was as if his whole body was wrapped in twilight.

Lee had never seen him smile like that.

For a moment she mistakenly thought that he was white in front of her, and wrinkles crept up his face, and that he was bent on his back, like those old men, and was about to die.

Li's heart tightened, like a knife pierced into it, the tip of the knife rotated and twisted, and the pain made her even stagnate.

Then, the vibrations of those words in the air disappeared.

Along with the fetters in Chen Shao's eyes, the illusion in front of her eyes, and the pain in her heart, they all quickly dissipated.

The rain beats on the eaves, the rooms are as bright as day, the cold smell of tea, and the gentle sound of the wind outside the window.

They sat opposite each other, and he was right in front of her, just a stone's throw away from her.

Suddenly, Chen Shao laughed "heh".

It's a weird smile, as if I'm using this smile to sober myself up.

Then, he bowed his head to Li apologetically: "That's it, I'll listen to Zhenzhen's meaning first, no matter how you choose, I have nothing to say." ”

He fluttered his sleeves, and his handsome face looked over without much expression.

is still a gentleman who is often seen, and a gentleman is like jade.

Li Shi raised his pale face, and the palm that was too tightly squeezed had become numb.

There seemed to be an hourglass in her heart, and something was flying away at a very fast speed, and she couldn't grasp it, she couldn't hold it, so she could only let it pass, gradually hollowing out her heart.

Then, a cold wind blew in.

She heard the hollow echo, "whoa, whoa, whoa," boundless, never-ending.

She tore the corner of her lips, and a cold tear slipped quietly.

She always thought that her heart was already empty.

When Zhou Jiuniang came to the door, when he seemed to hide his whereabouts for the past eight years intentionally and unintentionally, when they finally went from raising their eyebrows to respecting each other like ice.

She thought that her heart was empty, like the long and endless nights.

Actually, no.

She actually still has some thoughts.

In the deepest part of my heart, in some unknown corner.

The thought was so hidden that even she didn't know it.

But now, she finally felt it.

The widening void finally made her realize that the person she knew best, and the strangest she knew, was leaving her in a way that she could not understand or control.

His green shirt and whispering, his smile, his slender fingers holding the tea cup, when he called her "Zhenzhen", his eyes were always slightly bent......

Li suddenly knew very clearly that from tonight onwards, from this question, all this would cease to exist.

Even if it is still there now, it will disappear in the near future.

Gone forever.

"The concubine is ......" Li opened his trembling lips, only said two words, and then could not continue.

The tongue was like a boulder pressed by a thousand catties, and the coldness in her heart and the autumn breeze outside the window kept caressing her body and her heart, and even the bones and blood were soaked in the cool breeze.

And every time she opened her lips, the wind held her up, pushing her towards the boundless darkness and emptiness.

If you don't connect to the sky or the earth, stretching out your hand is the endless loneliness and the eternal coldness.

Li suddenly felt miserable.

If you are in the dark and endless wilderness, the vast world, she is the only one.

Does she really want to be like this, alone, through the rest of her life?

I can't see that person, I can't hear that person, dig that familiar figure out from the bottom of my heart, and then, with that hollow that can absorb all the heat and warmth, live a life?

Does she really want to do this?

And if not, what does she really want, what she wants most in this life?

Li Shi looked blankly ahead.

The tip of her cold tongue was numb, and the trembling of her body became stronger and stronger every moment, and the air and candlelight turned into viscous waves at this moment, drowning her little by little.

She felt like she couldn't breathe.

She was going to leave the house at once, out of this suffocating place.

But she knew she couldn't go.

Chen Shao is serious.

When he asked her this, he was really planning to leave forever.

Li turned his head slowly, casting his eyes out the window.

The vision has become blurred, and as far as the eye can see, the only piece is miserable white, stabbing people from opening their eyes.

She slowly closed her eyes.

Outside the window, the rain was still falling......