"Xiao Nan, that's your ......"

"The child born to my father's wife, Zhou Xiaobei." Zhou Xiaonan said lightly.

"That's your half-brother, right?" Su Tao asked.

"So to speak," Zhou Xiaonan suddenly sneered, "but he won't admit it even if he dies, he regards me as a disgrace to the family." ”

Su Tao was silent, although she was quite curious, but her tutor had always restrained her desire to explore other people's privacy, not to mention that this was something that Zhou Xiaonan didn't want to mention, she really couldn't think of any reasonable and non-hurtful way to ask.

However, after being silent for a while, Zhou Xiaonan took the initiative to speak, "Su Tao, I haven't mentioned my family's affairs to others, I don't know how to speak." But I want to tell you. It's not because I don't mind anymore, it's that I feel like you're defending me without knowing it, and I shouldn't keep you in the dark anymore. What's more, even if I don't say it, you'll know about it from other people's mouths in the future. It's ironic! Things I never dared to mention are actually known to almost everyone in this circle. So I'd rather you know about it from my mouth. The look on Zhou Xiaonan's face was quite tired, which made Su Tao feel a little distressed inexplicably.

"If you really don't want to say it, it doesn't matter. You can wait until you're ready, I don't mind, I can understand how you feel. Su Tao said with relief.

Zhou Xiaonan smiled self-deprecatingly and waved his hand, "No need, let me finish it in one go, let's die happily at once." I won't necessarily have that courage in the future. ”

Su Tao nodded knowingly.

Zhou Xiaonan said, "Zhou Xiaobei's mother is my father's wife, called Zheng Yuan, her family has a very good background, her father Zheng Huaihai was originally the director of our provincial economic and trade commission, and her mother is also an executive in a well-known state-owned enterprise, my father also really made a fortune through the power of his family, and Zhou Xiaobei's grandfather still holds 25 percent of the shares in my father's company." So my dad has always been in the grip of their family. I even suspect that my father's purpose in marrying Zheng Yuan was not pure, and he just wanted to borrow her family's resources. Because Zheng Yuan is the only daughter in the family and is very favored by her parents, after she got married, Zheng Huaihai did his best to support my father and wanted to protect his daughter's future life. However, he didn't expect my father's career to develop, but he didn't protect his daughter for the rest of his life. My dad quickly found other women outside, many women, including my mom. ”

"In this way, your dad is really a scumbag. Use your own wife to play with other people's feelings. Su Tao did not shy away from saying bluntly.

"Heh, who's to say it's not?" Zhou Xiaonan said, "But that Zheng Yuan seems to be in love with him, even if he knows that he is stealing outside, he still covers my father in front of her father, and willingly gives birth to a child for him, well, it is Zhou Xiaobei." It is said that this name was given by his grandfather, Zheng Huaihai He is a northerner, and his work was transferred to the south, and the name Zhou Xiaobei was to express his homesickness, but my father had to give me a 'Zhou Xiaonan' who thought he was similar to pretend. Later, my mother got pregnant and gave birth to me, and Zheng Yuan knew about this matter, she was not in good health, and because of her husband's cheating, she was too depressed, and she barely endured it before, so she comforted herself which man didn't care, just go home, after all, she had a child with him, but she didn't expect him to have another child outside, she completely collapsed, and her body collapsed instantly, and she died of illness not long after. At that time, Zhou Xiaobei was probably only four or five years old. Zhou Xiaonan narrated calmly, his voice calmly as if he was telling someone else's story.

"So, Zhou Xiaobei's mother has actually passed away a long time ago?" Su Tao said in surprise.

Zhou Xiaonan nodded.

"Then why are you still ......?"

"Why did my mother still not be able to straighten her out when she died? So much so that I'm still a bastard with no name, am I?" Zhou Xiaonan laughed self-deprecatingly.

Su Tao saw that Zhou Xiaonan's face was a little angry, but he didn't shut up because of this, just nodded slightly, "That's probably what it means." ”

"You should be able to guess how Zheng Huaihai could agree. After Zheng Yuan passed away, Zheng Huaihai also heard about my father's affair outside, and almost turned his face with him. In the end, it was for the benefit of Zhou Xiaobei that he didn't completely fall out with my dad. After all, Zhou's enterprise had become a climate at that time, and if the two completely turned their faces, they would inevitably lose both. In order to pave the way for his grandson Zhou Xiaobei, Zheng Huaihai has supported the development of the Zhou Group over the years, while secretly operating and encroaching on Zhou's shares, in an attempt to better contain my father and ensure Zhou Xiaobei's absolute inheritance of the family property. ”

"Zhou Xiaobei's grandfather is beyond reproach for doing this, it's just that you are embarrassed by your identity, caught in the middle, and because of Zheng Yuan's death, you are placed at a moral disadvantage."

"Who's to say it isn't? Sometimes you don't do anything and your hands are already bloody. Zhou Xiaonan smiled bitterly.

"So, did you let Zhou Xiaobei treat you like this because you always felt guilty about his mother's death?"

Zhou Xiaonan was silent and did not answer.

"You didn't cause it, you know." Su Tao didn't know what to say anymore, "No one can control their birth ......"

"yes, of course I can't control it. If I could control it, I would never choose such an existence. My existence is a superfluous. Zhou Xiaonan's eyes were filled with tears, "If it weren't for me, maybe everything could be better, no matter who it is." ”

"How can you say that?" Su Tao said in surprise.

"If it weren't for me, Zheng Yuan might not die, Zhou Xiaobei wouldn't be without his mother, his relationship with his father might not be so bad, Zheng Huaihai wouldn't lose his daughter, he wouldn't have had a fight with my father, and the Zhou family wouldn't be torn apart, and my mother wouldn't have left my dad like any other woman, maybe she would have her own marriage and family, instead of being infamous for the rest of her life......" Tears flowed down Zhou Xiaonan's eyes, "My existence does not bring happiness, Instead, it makes the people around me feel hatred and pain because of me. So why on earth do I exist? ”

"How can you say that? Are you all living for others? You have a life of your own. Su Tao shouted.

"How can a person who can only bring pain to others talk about his own life? I admit that I have always been very selfish, because I found that my existence really did not bring any meaning to others, so I had to numb myself and live my own life. However, even then I can't live my own life. Is there any meaning to such a selfish life? Zhou Xiaonan's eyes were a little hollow.

"Why do you say that your life is meaningless? At least you make sense to me. You say you can only bring pain to others...... Are you sure? All I know is that you have brought me joy and comfort when I feel like I have nothing. You were the one who made me feel like I still had someone to lean on. Why do you say that such a life is meaningless?" Su Tao said.

Zhou Xiaonan didn't speak, Su Tao gently hugged Zhou Xiaonan's shoulder, "Xiaonan, no matter what, I will be by your side, okay?" This will all pass, and we will one day be able to live the life we want. ”

"I hope so." Zhou Xiaonan barely squeezed out a smile.

"So what are you going to do now, do you want to contact your dad? Otherwise, you can't really never go home. Su Tao looked worried.

"No, you can't." Zhou Xiaonan shook his head.

"Why?" Su Tao said in confusion.

"Because what Zhou Xiaobei said just now is right," Zhou Xiaonan looked up at Su Tao, "I'm just under the fence in the Zhou family, and my dad doesn't like my mother much, but it's because of a child like me that he is willing to provide our expenses." He already has a son born in the main room like Zhou Xiaobei, and I was originally an insignificant existence. But because of Zheng Huaihai's intervention, my dad already had a grudge against Zhou Xiaobei, and as Zhou Xiaobei grew older, he slowly began to understand the previous things, and his opinions on him became bigger and bigger. As soon as the relationship between father and son was strained, my dad remembered me. He only realized that he had another son who was well-behaved and easy to control, and it was then that he paid a little attention to me. It's probably the feeling of playing a game with a large number and practicing a small one. ”

"Now that your dad has slowly begun to pay attention to you, you shouldn't take this opportunity to tell him about your life. At least you can restrain Zhou Xiaobei's behavior. Su Tao suggested.

"You are wrong, even if the tuba is still tuba after all, no matter how much Zhou Xiaobei does too much, he is the prince of their Zhou family, his only son-in-law, the heir recognized by the outside world for so many years, and the bargaining chip that Zheng Huaihai strongly supports, compared with these tangible interests, Zhou Xiaobei's rebellion can be said to be not worth mentioning. In comparison, I, a bastard with no name and average talent, can be said to be almost useless except for the virtue of being obedient and pleasing to him. ”

"So......" Su Tao looked at him in a daze.

"Therefore, not only can I not resist Zhou Xiaobei, but I also have to try to avoid conflict with him. Because once Zhou Xiaobei and I really reach the point where water and fire are incompatible, the person who will be sacrificed must be me. So, you just asked me why I didn't dare to call my dad, not only because I felt guilty about Zhou Xiaobei. The real reason is that I am far less important than Zhou Xiaobei, and even far less important than the business he wants to discuss. If I call for help, he will only think that I have no merit - being a good man, and I will only find trouble for him, and then my situation will only be worse. So, I told you, I don't have a choice. Su Tao, I don't have any choice. Zhou Xiaonan's voice was full of bitterness.

"Xiao Nan......" Su Tao was a little shocked, and she didn't know what to say.

"Su Tao, I really don't want to live such a life anymore, it's too bitter."