Ritter's telegram read, "Mrs. Werkes is critically ill. Quick return. ”

As the train pulls into Atlanta Station, twilight falls; The whole city was shrouded in a foggy drizzle. The gas street lamps shone dimly and turned into yellow dots in the fog. Ritter picked her up at the station in a carriage. At the sight of his face, she was startled, more panicked than when she received the telegram. She had never seen his face so dull before.

"She's not there yet," she asked aloud.

"Nope. She's alive. Ritter put her into the carriage and sat down, and then ordered the coachman: "Go to Mrs. Welks's house, quickly!" ”

"What's wrong with her? I didn't know she was sick. She looked fine last week. Did something go wrong? Ah, Ritter, it's not going to be as good as you say."

"She's going to die," Ritter said, his tone as dull as his face, "she wants to see you." ”

"No, Lannie won't die! Oh, Lanny won't die! What the hell happened to her? ”

"She had a miscarriage."

"A small one, a small birth, a small one, a small one, one of her" Scarlett said incoherently. Ritter was so shocked by the terrible news that she couldn't even speak.

"You didn't know she was going to have a baby?"

She didn't even have the strength to shake her head.

"Ah, yes. I don't think you know. She must have never said it to anyone. She wants to surprise everyone to make everyone happy and happy. But I know. ”

"You know? But she certainly didn't tell you! ”

"No need to tell. I saw it myself. She's been so happy for the past two months, and I know it can't be anything else. ”

"But Ritter, the doctor said that if she wanted to have another child, she would die!"

"It's really going to kill her," Ritter said, and then shouted to the coachman, "Oh, God! Can't you just go faster? ”

"But Ritter, she's not going to die! I'm not dead as soon as I'm one, and I'm one"

"She doesn't have as much energy as you. She hasn't been very fit. She only has a good heart. ”

The carriage shook a bit and stopped in front of a flat-roofed house. Ritter pulled her out of the car. She trembled in horror when she felt a desolation strike her, and she grabbed him by the arm.

"Are you going in too, Ritter?"

"Nope." As he spoke, he sat back into the carriage.

She hurried up the steps, through the hallway, and suddenly pushed the door open, and in the dim light sat Ashley, Aunt Petty, and India. Scarlett thought: Why did Wild Indiana come too? Melanie said she wasn't allowed to enter the house again. The three men inside stood up when they saw her. Aunt Petty bit her lip to stop them from trembling, and India stared at her, her eyes full of sadness but not hostile. Ashley looked sluggish, as if sleepwalking, and when he walked up to her and put his hand on her arm, he spoke as if he were sleepwalking.

"She said she wanted to see you," he said, "and she said she wanted to see you." ”

"Can I see her now?" She turned to Melanie's door, which was closed.

"Nope. Dr. Meade is in there now. I'm glad you're here, Scarlett. ”

"I'm here as soon as I can," said Scarlett, taking off her hat and cloak, "and the train told me that she's better, isn't she, Ashley?" Tell me! Don't be so stunned! She's not really one."

"She kept saying she wanted to see you." Ashley said, staring into her eyes. She saw the answer to the question in his eyes. In an instant, her heart stopped, and then a strange fear throbbed her chest, one stronger than anxiety and sorrow. It couldn't be true, she thought to herself excitedly as she tried to suppress her fear. Doctors often get it wrong. I don't believe this is true. I must not allow myself to be convinced. If I believed it was true, I would have screamed. I must think of something else.

"I don't believe it!" She shouted loudly as she stared at the three elongated faces, as if she was challenging them to see if they dared to contradict her words, "Why didn't Melanie tell me earlier?" If I had known, I would never have gone to Marietta! ”

Ashley seemed to have come to his senses. There was a look of pain in his eyes.

"Alright, baby, but wait a minute," said the doctor, in a more amiable tone, "come on, Scarlett. ”

They tiptoed down the aisle to the closed door, where the doctor grabbed Scarlett's shoulders with his hand.

"Listen to me, miss," he whispered briefly, "no hysterical shouting, no deathbed confession to her, or I will break your neck!" Don't be so stupid and stare at me. You know what I mean. Miss Lanny should die peacefully. You must not say anything to her about Ashley in order to make your conscience work. I've never hurt a woman until now, but if you say anything there, I'll settle accounts with you. ”

Before she could reply, he opened the door, pushed her in, and then closed it again. The small room was made of worthless black walnut furniture, and the lamp was covered with newspapers, making the room look half-lit and half-dark. The room was small and old-fashioned, like a dormitory for female students. The narrow cot with a low headboard, the plain mesh curtains tied with rope loops, the clean, faded carpet of broken felt were a world of difference from the delicate carved furniture, peach-colored brocade curtains and embroidered carpets of Scarlett's luxurious bedroom.

Melanie lay on the bed, her body shrunk and flattened like a little girl. Two black braids draped over the sides of the face, and the closed eyes were sunk deep into two purple circles. As soon as she saw her, Scarlett leaned her back against the door and froze. Despite the darkness in the room, Melanie's face was sallow, not bloody, and her nose was sunken in. Until then, she had hoped that Dr. Mead had been mistaken. But she understands now. She had seen many people in the hospital during the war with such a withered countenance, and she knew full well what the inevitable end would be.

Melanie is dying, but Scarlett won't believe it's true. Melanie won't die. There was no way she could die. God wouldn't let her die when she needed her so much. She had never thought she needed Melanie before. But now, the feeling came to her like a raging tide, all the way to the depths of her heart. She had always relied on Melanie, just as she had relied on herself, but she had never realized it. Now that Melanie is dying, Scarlett realizes that she can't live without her. At this point, as she walked through the room on tiptoe and flustered towards Melanie's quiet body, she realized that Melanie had always been her sword, her shield, her comfort, and the source of her strength.

"I'm going to get her! She must not be allowed to go! She thought as she sat down on the edge of the bed, and in her panic her dress made a rustling sound. She hurriedly grabbed the weak hand on the bedspread, which was cold and startled her.

"It's me, Lannie." She said.

Melanie's eyes opened a thin slit, and then, as if satisfied that it was Scarlett, she closed them again. After a pause, she took a full breath and whispered:

"Will you promise me?"

"Well, I'll promise you everything!"

"Xiao Bo, you take care of him."

Scarlett only felt like her throat was stuck by something, so she could only nod and gently squeeze the hand she was holding in agreement.

"I'll give him to you." A smile flashed across her face as she spoke, "Do you remember when I gave him to you before?" One before he was born. ”

Remember? How could she forget that moment? She remembered it vividly, as if that terrible day had returned. She could feel the heat of that noon in September, she remembered her fear of the Yankees, she could hear the footsteps of the soldiers as they retreated, she remembered that Melanie had begged her to take her children away if she died, and she remembered how she hated Melanie that day, and hoped for her death.

"I killed her," she thought in agony from superstition, "and I had hoped for her death many times, and God had heard, and now he has come to punish me." ”

"Oh, Lanny, don't say that! You know your illness will be better."

"Nope. Please promise me. ”

Scarlett choked up.

"You know I'm going to promise you. I must treat him like my own child. ”

"What about the university?" Melanie asked in a faint, monotone voice.

"Well, yes! Let him go to college, go to Harvard, go to study in Europe, he will have whatever he wants, and there will be a pony and I will give him music lessons, please, Lannie, you must hold on! Be sure to do your best to hold on! ”

There was silence again, and Melanie's face showed a desperate desire to speak.

"Ashley," she said, "you and Ashley," before she could finish speaking, her voice shuddered again.

As soon as Melanie mentioned Ashley, Scarlett's heart suddenly stopped, and she only felt that her whole body was as cold as granite. It turned out that Melanie had already knew. Scarlett leaned her head on the bedspread, wanting to cry but couldn't, her throat like a ruthless hand. Melanie wasn't kept in the dark! At this time, Scarlett no longer felt ashamed, nor did she have any other feelings, but only deep remorse, regret that she had been hurting this gentle and kind woman all these years. Melanie knew that, but she had always been her loyal friend. Ah, how nice it would be if we could turn back the clock and let her go through all these years all over again! She would never allow her gaze to meet Ashley's gaze again.

"Oh God," she prayed inwardly, quickly, "I beg you to let her live!" I'm going to make amends for my mistakes to her. I'm going to be very nice to her. I'll never say a word to Ashley again for the rest of my life, just ask you to heal her!" ”

"Ashley," Melanie said weakly, reaching out and touching Scarlett's head against the bedspread. She pulled Rascarlett's hair with her thumb and forefinger, but she didn't have any strength like a baby. Scarlett understood what she meant, and knew that Melanie wanted her to look up. But she didn't dare to look up, she didn't dare to meet Melanie's gaze, because it had already seen her through.

"Ashley." When Melanie screamed softly, Scarlett controlled herself. Nor will she be more uncomfortable when she faces God on the Last Judgment Day and sees the judgment on herself in His gaze. Her soul cringed, but she looked up.

However, what she saw was still the lovely pair of black eyes and the gentle face, but the eyes were sunken in, showing the sluggishness of dying, and the mouth was gasping hard. There was not a trace of reproach or condemnation on his face, nor a trace of fear, only anxiety, fearing that he would no longer have the strength to speak.

All this was a big surprise to Scarlett, who was overwhelmed for a moment, and didn't even feel relieved. After a while, as Melanie's hand tightened, a warm current welled up in her heart, which filled her with gratitude to God, and she prayed humbly and selflessly for the first time in her life.

"Thank you, my God. I know I don't deserve it, but I'm still thankful you didn't let her know. ”

"Ashley what, Lanny?"

"Will you - take care of him too?"

"Oh, I will."

"He's got a cold easily."

A pause followed.

"Take care of—his business—you understand?"

"Yes, I understand. I will. ”

With all her strength, she said:

"Ashley doesn't have any work experience."

If it weren't for the deathbed, Melanie would never have commented on her husband like that.

"Take care of him, Scarlett don't let him know."

"I will definitely take care of him and his business, and I will definitely not let him know. I'll just give him a few suggestions. ”

When Melanie's gaze met Scarlett's again, she exerted all her strength to reveal a small smile, a smile of victory. Their gaze led to a tacit understanding, and the task of protecting Ashley Welx was transferred from one woman to another in this extremely harsh world, and Ashley must not know about it, lest it hurt his pride as a man.

At this time, the look of struggle on Melanie's tired face slowly disappeared, as if as long as Scarlett agreed, she was completely relieved.

"You're so smart—so brave—you've always been so good to me—"

Hearing these words, Scarlett's throat was hot and she was about to cry, so she quickly covered her mouth with her hand. At this moment, she really wanted to cry like a child, and told Melanie out loud that I was a devil! I've been lying to you all along! I've never done anything for you! That's all for Ashley. ”

She stood up suddenly, her teeth clenching her thumb to regain her composure. At this time, Rhett's words rang in her ears again, and she loves you. Let this love be your cross. "Now the cross is heavier. She had used all means to snatch Ashley out of her hands. This sin is deep enough. Now, Melanie, who had blindly trusted her all her life, gave her the same love and trust when she was dying, which made her sin even deeper. No, she can't tell the truth. She can't even say that you have to hold on and live! "She must let her die quietly and effortlessly, without tears or sorrow.

Then the door opened softly, and Dr. Meade stood in the doorway, beckoning majestically. Scarlett held back tears, bent down, grabbed one of Melanie's hands, and pressed it to her cheek.

"Good night," she said, her voice calmer than she had imagined.

"Promise me," Melanie whispered, her voice faint.

"I promise both, my dear."

"Captain Butler, treat him well. He loves you so much. ”

"Ritter?" Scarlett thought to herself, confused, that these words meant nothing to her.

"Okay, I'll do it." Without thinking, she kissed her hand softly before putting it back on the bedspread.

As she walked through the door, the doctor whispered, "Tell the two ladies to let them come in at once." ”

Through the blur of tears, she saw India and Petty lift their dresses and put their hands on their waists so that they would not make a rustling sound, and followed the doctor into the room. As soon as the door was closed, the whole house was silent. Ashley didn't know where to hide. Scarlett leaned her head against the wall like a naughty child being punished against the wall, rubbing her aching throat.

Behind that door, Melanie was slowly dying, and with her departure was the force she had unconsciously relied on for years. Why, ah, why didn't she realize how much she loved Melanie and how much she needed Melanie? But who would have thought that this petite, ordinary Melanie would be a pillar she could rely on in times of crisis? Usually Melanie is always ashamed and blushing in front of the living, and she is also frightened when she expresses her opinion, she does not dare to raise her voice, and she is always worried that the old ladies will make irresponsible remarks, and she does not even have the courage to say "bah" to the goose. And yet—Scarlett recalls that quiet, hot noon at Tara Manor years ago. The body of the Yankee was still covered with gray smoke, and Melanie was standing at the top of the stairs with Charles's saber in her hand. Scarlett remembers thinking to herself: How ridiculous is wild! Lannie can't even lift that saber! But now, Scarlett knew that Melanie would rush down the stairs and kill the Yankee or herself if she needed to.

Yes, Melanie had rushed to the scene that day with that little hand dragging a saber, ready to fight for her. Now, when Scarlett looked back sadly, she understood that Melanie had always had a saber in her hand, like her shadow, unobtrusively guarding her side, loving her, and fighting for her with infinite, blind loyalty, against the Yankees, against the fire, against hunger, against poverty, against public opinion, and even with her beloved flesh and blood.

When Scarlett realizes that the saber that once glittered between her and the world is about to be sheathed forever, she feels that her courage and confidence are slowly disappearing.

"Lannie is the only girlfriend I've ever had," she thought desolately, "and she's the only woman who has ever truly loved me except my mother." She is also like a mother, everyone who knows her is attached to her and is reluctant to leave. ”

Suddenly, it seemed that it was Eren who was lying behind the door, leaving this world for the second time. She suddenly seemed to have returned to Tara Manor in the midst of troubled times, and she felt lonely and desolate. Because she understands that without this frail, gentle, and kind-hearted woman, she will not be able to face life without her tremendous support.

She stood in the aisle, bewildered. The glow of the fireplace in the living room cast a long shadow on the walls around her. The whole house was silent, like a cold drizzle soaking her body. Ashley! Where is Ashley?

She walked to the living room, where she tried to find Ashley, like a frozen animal looking for fire. But Ashley wasn't there. She had to find him. She had discovered Melanie's power, and she had discovered her dependence on it, but she had lost it before she found it, but Ashley was still there. Ashley was strong, insightful, and comforting. In Ashley's body, in his love, there was a strength that could sustain her, a courage that could dispel her fears, and a sense of comfort that could fill her grief.

He must have been in his room, she thought. So she stood on tiptoe and walked gently through the aisle, to his door, and knocked lightly. There was no one inside, so she pushed the door open. Ashley stood in front of the dresser, staring at a pair of Melanie's mended gloves. He picked up a glove and looked at it as if he had never seen it before. Then he gently lowered it as if the glove was made of glass, and picked up another one.

She cried out in a trembling voice, "Ashley! He slowly turned to look at her. The lethargic indifference in his gray eyes vanished, and now they were opening wide to reveal what they were. She saw that there was also fear, helplessness, and confusion. The fear was on par with hers, the helplessness was stronger than hers, the confusion was deeper than hers. Looking at his face again, she was even more frightened than she had been in the aisle just now. She walked over to him.

"I was terrified," she said. "Oh, Ashley, hold me, I'm so scared!"

He didn't move, just stared at her as he gripped the glove tightly with both hands. She put a hand on his arm and said softly: What is this? ”

He looked at her eagerly, desperately trying to find something from her, but couldn't find it. Finally he spoke, but it wasn't his voice anymore.

"I was just about to need you," he said, "and I was about to run to you like a child who needed comfort, but you were also a child, and you were more frightened than I was, so you came to me first." ”

"No, you're not frightened, you won't be frightened," she cried out, "and nothing can ever frighten you." But I've always been strong with you."

"If I've always been strong, it's because she's backing me," he said in a hoarse voice, and then lowered his head to look at the glove, smoothing the fingers on the glove with his hand. "But now, now, all my strength will go with her."

There was utter desperation in his deep voice, and she was so frightened that she quickly pulled her hand back from his arm and took a step back. In a depressive silence, she felt like she had truly gotten to know him for the first time in her life.

"Oh one," she said slowly, "I see, Ashley, you love her, don't you?"

It seemed to take a great deal of effort for him to speak.

"I have had many dreams, but only she remains in my memory, only she has breathed and existed, and only she has never been shattered in the face of reality."

"Dreams!" She thought as she felt a pang of irritation as she had done in the past, "He always dreams and dreams!" There was never a shred of practical judgment! ”

So she said with a heavy heart and a little pain, "You have always been a big fool, Ashley. Why don't you see that she's a thousand times ten thousand times better than me? ”

"I beg you, Scarlett, don't say it. I hope you can understand the torture I've been suffering for the past few days."

"You are tormented! Do you think I'm a little oh, Ashley, and you should have known years ago that you loved her and not me! Why didn't you know about it sooner? If you had known earlier, everything would have been very different, and you should have realized it earlier, and you shouldn't have hung me there with all your so-called reputation and sacrifice and all that sort of thing. If you had found fault with me a few years ago, I would have been sad, but I could have managed to get through it. But you've waited until now, when Lanny is about to die, and you've just woken up from a dream, but it's too late to do anything. Oh, Ashley, you men should know about this first, not us women! You should have seen that you have always loved her, and the reason why you need me is just like Ritter needs that woman named Watling! ”

Hearing her words, he couldn't help but take a step back, but his eyes were still fixed on her, as if begging her not to talk any further, begging her to give him some comfort. Every line of his face acknowledged that she was right, and his drooping shoulders showed that his inner reproach was harsher than any rebuke she had ever had. He stood silently in front of her, clutching the glove in his hand, as if it were a hand that could only understand him. In the silence that followed those words, her anger slowly subsided, replaced by a pity mixed with contempt. Her conscience disturbed her exceedingly. She's striking someone who has been utterly defeated and defenseless—and she's promised Melanie to take care of him.

"I just said yes to her, and I said so many mean things to him that made him sad. In fact, there is no need to say this, no one needs to say this. He knew everything himself, and was feeling sorry for himself," she thought desolately, "and he wasn't yet an adult. He was just a kid like me, worried about losing her. Lannie knew he would, and Lannie knew him far better than I did. That's why she asked me to take care of Bo and him at the same time. With such a big change, how can Ashley stand up? I'm up to it. I can handle everything. I've been through so many things, can I do it if I don't stand up? But he can't do it, and he can't stand anything without Melanie. ”

"Forgive me, darling," she said softly with her arms outstretched, "I know you're sad. But remember, she didn't know anything, she never even doubted, and God was so kind to us. ”

He quickly walked over to her and hugged her violently. She stood on tiptoe, pressed her warm cheek to his, and gently stroked his hair with one hand.

"Don't cry, honey. What she wants to see is your bravery. She's going to see you in a moment, you have to be strong. Don't let her see you've cried. It's going to worry her. ”

He hugged her tightly, she couldn't breathe, and all she could hear was his choked voice, "What can I do?" I can't live without her! ”

"I can't live either." She thought. Thinking of the long years since Melanie's death made her tremble. But she tried her best to restrain herself. Because Ashley was relying on her, Melanie was relying on her. Just as she had thought of that drunken and exhausted moonlight at Tara Manor: it takes strong shoulders to carry a heavy burden. "Yes, her shoulders are strong, but Ashley's shoulders are weak. So, she straightened her shoulders and forced her composure to kiss his tearful cheek, a kiss that was neither excited, longing, nor passionate, but only calm and gentle.

"There will be a way." She said.

Then a door in the hallway was slammed open, and Dr. Mead shouted urgently:

"Ashley! Hurry up! ”

"OMG! She went! Scarlett thought, "Ashley hasn't had time to say goodbye to her yet!" But maybe one"

"Quick!" She shouted as she pushed him harder, for he stood there stunned as if he were in a daze. "Quick!"

She opened the door and motioned for him to go out. Hearing her words, Ashley hurried into the aisle as if he had been electrified, still clutching the glove tightly in his hand. She heard his footsteps hurrying through the hallway, then the sound of the door shut.

She shouted again: "Oh my God! Then he slowly walked to the edge of the bed and sat down, burying his head in his hands. She suddenly felt very tired, more tired than she had ever been in her life. For with the sound of the door slamming shut, the taut string that had been struggling with her, supporting her and giving her strength, suddenly snapped. She felt that all the strength in her body had been exhausted, and all her feelings had dried up. Now, she doesn't feel sadness or remorse, or fear or panic. She felt nothing but exhaustion, and felt her heart beating dullly, mechanically, like the clock on the mantelpiece.

In this dreary atmosphere, a thought arose in her heart. Ashley didn't love her, and never really loved her, but she wasn't saddened to learn of that fact. It is said that she should feel sad, she should feel desolate and sad, and she should scream loudly at fate. Because for a long time, she has relied on his love to survive. It was his love that sustained her through so many difficult and difficult dark years. However, the facts are clear. He didn't love her, and she didn't care now. The reason why she didn't care was because she didn't love him either. Since she doesn't love him, no matter what he does or says, it won't make her feel sad.

She lay down on the bed with her head buried in the pillow. She didn't feel the need to refute this idea, and there was no need to say to herself: Ye Ke I do love him. I have loved him for many years. It is impossible for love to become cold all at once. ”

Because it can become indifferent, and it can become indifferent.

"He never really existed, except in my own imagination," she thought not without weariness, "and all I loved was an idol of my own imagination, an idol without life." I made myself a beautiful outfit and fell in love with it. When Ashley came on horseback, so handsome, so distinctive, I put the suit on him, whether it fit or not, and I didn't want to see what kind of person he was. What I've always loved is that beautiful outfit, and it's not him at all. ”

Now she could think back to years ago. She remembered that at Tara Manor, she was standing in the sun in an embroidered green dress, and she was fascinated by the young rider with blond hair shining like a silver helmet. Now she saw clearly that getting him was just a childish fantasy of hers, just like when she pestered her father to buy her that pair of aquamarine earrings. Because as soon as the earrings arrived, they lost their original value, just as anything but money would lose its original value once it reached her hands. In the same way, if Ashley had proposed to her and she refused to marry him, and her vanity had been satisfied, Ashley would have been worthless. If she could manipulate Ashley at will, and see him like other boys, his feelings becoming more and more intense, entangled, jealous, troubled, and begging, then, as soon as she met another man, her infatuation with him would disappear, just as the mist would dissipate when it saw the sun or was blown by a breeze.

"I'm stupid!" She thought bitterly, "Now I have to do it myself." What I've been hoping for is finally happening. I've been hoping that Lanny would die so I could get him. Now that she's dead, I can get him, but I don't want him anymore.

He would have asked me if I would like to divorce Ritter and marry him. Marry him? Even if I hold him on a silver plate and give him to me, I won't ask for it!" But even so, I still have to wear him around my neck for the rest of my life. As long as he lives for one day, he must take care of him, and he cannot be starved or hurt by others. He's like another kid of mine, and he has to rely on me for everything. I lost a lover and had an extra child. If I hadn't promised Lanny to take care of him, I wouldn't care, even if I never saw him again. ”

She closed the door and entered the dark foyer, where the humid air of the evening was chilling. The rain stopped, and except for the occasional drop of rain dripping from the eaves, it was silent and silent. The whole world was shrouded in a thick fog, and the slightly chilly fog was filled with the smell of the end of the year. The houses across the street were pitch black, with only a faint light coming out of the windows* of one house, struggling through the fog and spilling onto the street, forming golden dots of light. The whole world seemed to be enveloped in a static gray fog blanket. The whole world was silent.

She rested her head on the pillar of the foyer, ready to weep heartily, but there was not a single tear. The catastrophe was so deep that tears could not be counted. She was trembling all over. The two impregnable fortresses of her life had collapsed at the same time, and the loud sound still reverberated in her heart and resounded in her ears. She stood for a moment, trying to reuse her magic weapon, and I would think about it tomorrow, and I would be able to hold it up tomorrow. However, the magic weapon also failed. Now she has to think about two things. First, why did Melanie never realize how much she loved her and needed her? Second, why has Ashley been so blind and stubborn, and has never seen his true face? She knew that whether it was tomorrow or the day after that to think about these two things, it would make her deeply sad.