In the fourth month of pregnancy, Zhang Weizhao had a dream in which he dreamed of his hometown.

In the dream, she lived in a small secluded courtyard with her grandfather, grandmother, father, and mother. In her previous life, this courtyard was where she lived until she graduated from elementary school, in an alley in the northwest corner of the old town of her hometown. Later, the alley was demolished, the courtyard no longer existed, and the family moved into the building. It's just that this small courtyard carries her initial memories of home, so every time she dreams of home, it is this small courtyard, not the apartment building where she lived later.

She dreamed that she told her father, mother, grandfather, and grandmother that she wanted to plant a tree in the yard. They all said yes and watched her plant trees. One starry night, she came to the middle of the yard and planted a pigeon's egg-sized, white and smooth seed.

After covering the soil, she found herself chanting a hymn that even she could not understand, and as she chanted, a seedling broke through the soil and grew rapidly, and in an instant it grew into a towering tree, with a trunk more than a meter wide in diameter, and branches and leaves pointing straight to the starry sky.

After another moment, the tree was full of white, crystalline fruit, which fell to the ground when the wind blew. Zhang Weizhao picked up the fruit and put it in his pocket, his heart full of joy.

The day after this dream, Zhang Weizhao felt the fetal movement. At first, it shook slightly, like an egg yolk gently shaking in the eggshell, and when it was more than six months old, you could see a bag coming out of the stomach from time to time.

Chen Youcong accompanied and witnessed this miracle bit by bit. I don't know why, seeing this little life growing up little by little in his wife's womb, he seems to have re-experienced the process of being conceived.

When Zhang Weizhao caressed his bulging belly lovingly, he seemed to see through the fog of time how his mother Ji Lingyun touched himself in his mother's womb with love. When Zhang Weizhao was looking forward to the arrival of this little life with longing, he also seemed to feel his mother's expectations for him back then.

This feeling often moved him to tears. He snuggled up to his wife and unborn child, and spent his time outside of government affairs with his wife and children, still feeling unsatisfied.

Sometimes, when lying next to Zhang Weizhao at night, he would put the little cloth bear or tiger that Zhang Weizhao prepared for the unborn child under his clothes, saying that he wanted to experience Zhang Weizhao's feelings and taste the hardships that Zhang Weizhao was experiencing.

This kind of behavior often makes Zhang Weizhao laugh. Zhang Weizhao thinks that there is a concept in psychoanalysis that can be used to describe Chen Youcong's behavior, that is, "uterine jealousy", which refers to the fact that men will have feelings of jealousy and envy for women's fertility because they do not have the organs to give birth to life. But Chen Youcong expressed this emotion very cutely.

During Zhang Weizhao's pregnancy, there were also civil officials who adhered to the old rules, believing that the emperor should enrich the harem at this time and spread the heirs. But for such remarks, Chen Youcong, who was in great joy, didn't bother to pay attention to it at all. Seeing that they didn't even splash a little water, these people died down after a while.

On the third day of June, Zhang Weizhao gave birth to a baby boy at three o'clock. Because the pregnancy has been kept exercising, reasonable arrangement of diet, the baby's weight is moderate, just six pounds, so the production process is very smooth.

During the delivery process, Chen Youcong accompanied her outside the delivery room throughout the whole process. After the child was born, it was washed and wrapped, and it was handed to Chen Youcong as soon as possible. Chen Youcong cried with joy.

The next step is to celebrate the whole country and give amnesty to the world.

But these bustles have nothing to do with Zhang Weizhao's mother and son. According to Zhang Weizhao's plan, before the child is one year old, she and the child will not directly participate in all the celebrations, but will recuperate in Kunning Palace.

At this time, there is no vaccine, and she can't risk letting the baby come into contact with all kinds of people, there are too many uncontrollable factors.

Although this move did not conform to the old royal practice, the emperor was willing, the empress dowager was willing, the empress dowager was willing, and the empress dowager did not express any objections, and others naturally had no opinions.

Subsequently, Zhang Weizhao broke the convention more and more, without exception, all of them were supported by the emperor, and the comments of others sometimes reached the ears of the emperor, but they would not shake his choice.

For example, Zhang Weizhao insisted on breastfeeding the little prince by himself. Chen Youcong was afraid that she would work too hard, but Zhang Weizhao had already told him about the benefits of breastfeeding, although he didn't fully understand, but he also understood that it was very beneficial to the child's health, so he no longer objected.

Another example is Zhang Weizhao's resolute refusal to wrap the little prince in swaddling clothes and tie him up, but let him play his hands and feet at will, and he didn't let the little prince wear more clothes.

Zhang Weizhao's practices were all contrary to the parenting habits at that time. At the time, people believed that if the legs of a baby were not stretched and tied straight, the legs would not grow straight; I also think that the dog day frozen milk baby, even in the summer, should put on thin cotton clothes for the child. But Zhang Weizhao felt that these practices were ridiculous, there were all kinds of harm but no benefit, the palace maids who were responsible for helping her take care of the baby were all trained by her, and they would naturally act according to her instructions and would not be disturbed by the old rules, so everything ran smoothly and there was no problem.

The most "excessive" thing about Zhang Weizhao is to insist that Chen Youcong participate in parenting, such as patting, wiping his buttocks, and taking a bath. Isn't it mad to let the king of a country do such a woman's part? But Chen Youcong also did it one by one, and he enjoyed it.

In fact, in the matter of raising children, Chen Youcong's cooperation and investment exceeded Zhang Weizhao's expectations.

Originally, Zhang Weizhao had faint worries about this. Because in Chen Youcong's life before the age of six, there was no father's participation at all, and after the age of six, Chen Jianjun did not express much real concern for him, Chen Jianjun was more concerned about whether there was a legitimate heir to consolidate his throne.

Boys who lack father's love will be triggered by childhood trauma when they grow up to be fathers themselves. When children and his wife need his love and care, he feels powerless and collapsed. He can't give what he never got, so he will try to escape. Sometimes it's escaping to work, sometimes it's escaping to fun, sometimes it's escaping to another woman.

His evasion will cause the lack of paternal love of the newborn, until the child grows up and becomes a new generation of incompetent fathers.

Zhang Weizhao had seen many such incompetent fathers in his previous life. The lack of a father's role in the family is such a common problem that a new term has been coined to describe this phenomenon, which is "widowed parenting".

Although Chen Youcong has been healing his wounds and becoming more mature and energetic before becoming a father. However, the human psychological process is an extremely complex and tortuous process, and even the most astute psychologists cannot accurately predict some psychological content when it has not yet been presented.

So Zhang Weizhao has meditated more than once, how Chen Youcong will welcome the arrival of their first child, and what kind of mood will this child bring him?

Then she found out that the truth was that Chen Youcong used all her strength to love their children. He told Zhang Weizhao more than once that the pain he suffered when he was a child would never be borne by his children again.

So he would gently dress the child, look into the child's eyes and smile, and take a walk on the windy cloister with the child in those hot evenings until the child stops crying, the hot sweat subsides, and he enters a sweet dream.

And when he loved this child with abundant energy, the lonely child in his own heart was also warmed and healed.

Suffering, in some cases, is transformed into a life-corrosive toxin, and in others it is transformed into a driving force for life growth.

was also cured at the same time, as well as Zhang Weizhao.

For a long time, Zhang Weizhao has played the role of a strong giver. When pregnant and giving birth, she is inevitably vulnerable, and this fragile state cannot be changed in a short period of time.

There are many men who are eager to bow down to their wives when they are beautiful, intelligent and capable, but when their wives are vulnerable and chaotic, they avoid them. And where is there a woman who is pregnant, giving birth, and struggling with blood stains who is not vulnerable? It is inevitable that newborns will bring chaos to the family. Life is born in this fragility and chaos.

Chen Youcong showed a full desire to protect his wife who was weak after giving birth, paid attention to her feelings, and was willing to meet her various requirements. Therefore, Zhang Weizhao's postpartum recovery speed is amazing.

Zhang Weizhao sighed in her heart more than once, if in the early days when she and Chen Youcong met, she had been serving as Chen Youcong's doctor, then now, in fact, the two of them are each other's doctors.

When Zhang Weizhao was studying, her teacher once said that a good quality and loving intimate relationship is better than a good psychiatrist to promote the growth of people's personality. Zhang Weizhao feels that her current experience has completely verified this statement.

The painful experience of death in the past life, the loneliness of wandering in a foreign land in this life, slowly retreated in Chen Youcong's warm and strong arms, in the milky fragrance and murmur of the baby in her arms.

It is true that she was far away from her family, far from her hometown, and went through a baptism of blood and fire. However, now that she has her own home, her lover and blood relatives, her life is complete again.

Life is a process of exodus and reconstruction, just as a bean must leave the pod and fall into the dirt in order to start a new cycle of life.

Although Zhang Weizhao went farther, she finally found her own land.