[a]

After typing the words "the full text is finished", I turned off my computer for the time being. I took my cigarette and lighter and walked to the staircase, my hands shaking all the time, and I lit the fire twice after hitting it. I was just one by myself, and suddenly I leaned against the railing and cried. When Huo Zuo asked Shen Yigong, "Are you afraid?", I actually couldn't control my emotions a little. The characters in this book are the most emotional group I have written so far, Shen Yigong and Huo Zuo, they are so good that I can't even find any words to describe them for a while after I finished the whole text. I could only say to myself: You must be well, no matter what, no matter how dark it is, please be well.

You'll wait until dawn together.

I just think they've come this far, and it doesn't matter what happens next. I didn't understand why I was crying so much, maybe it was joy or something else, but I finally calmed down until the smoke burned out.

In this book, I have invested a lot of my own private feelings, from their ignorance and longing at the beginning, or the cautious temptation and vigilance after meeting again, I paved the way for their love little by little, and let them develop and choose by themselves.

I pushed their love to the top, setting one threshold after another for objectivity, forcibly calming them down. By the time the writing reached about 100,000 words, they were no longer controlled by me, and I was gradually led by their choices, their unwillingness and forbearance, their struggles and sacrifices.

The two protagonists, compared to Shen Yigong, are more like us who have a passion to guard the bottom line and justice, while Huo Zuo is on the edge of crime and punishment, he is both perfect and imperfect, both has everything and is pessimistic to the bottom.

Before I write every Tanmei novel, there is one thing that I am very stubborn and insist on - that is, this couple of men who are in love, I hope that they are still attractive enough even if they are single, their love is just the icing on the cake for them, and they are very, very good people themselves.

Huo Zuo is not good, I borrowed Shen Yigong's mouth to say bluntly that he is not a good person, he has spent his life in revenge and redemption, and every day has been passed as the last day, waiting for death to come, because he knows that this is a fateful thing. The best thing that has ever appeared in his life is Shen Yigong, and other than that, for him, everything that was once good will be destroyed, just like his mother, his first love, everything he believes in.

But Shen Yigong gave him a ray of light.

Towards the end of the story, he picks up the "bottom line" again, and he will be willing to sacrifice to fulfill others, rather than passing indifference to the end. What was the last thing he thought about in the duel with Cheng Changyu? In the end, it is nothing more than personal sacrifice in exchange for the survival of more people.

Shen Yigong has always been so passive, but as he grows, he has controlled his fate step by step, and he has not been completely carried away by hatred and fallen into the abyss of sin. With a slight deviation, he is very likely to grow into a person exactly like Huo Zuo, but the innocence and almost paranoid sense of justice maintained in his personality allowed him to find what he wanted to stick to in the midst of the storm. Yes, he became more and more like the person he once hated, but he was not that kind of person after all.

His growth is both active and passive, taking on more and more responsibilities, and calmly moving forward step by step. Internal turmoil and assassination, external war and chaos, he can face it calmly, do his best to protect more people, and be a big man.

He was finally able to understand where the saddest part of Huo Zuo's vitality came from, and he finally had the confidence to hold up the other party's body and support each other to continue walking.

It's just two people, two men who love each other.

They are really nice.

[two]

I LISTENED TO ISEEFIRE WRITE THIS PART THE DAY AFTER THE FULL TEXT WAS WRITTEN. It's also a song that I've been writing for a single cycle since the fall of Shanghai. I love the lyrics, which coincide with the parts I wanted to write.

"NowIseefire, insidethemountain, the flames

Iseefire, burningthetrees, swept through the mountains and forests

AndIseefire, hollowingsouls, burn souls

Iseefire, bloodinthebreeze, like the wind drinking blood. ”

At that time, in order to write an article, I consulted a lot of information related to the defense of Songhu, and I once told readers that I had two tears that could not be avoided at all, one was the completely unavoidable pain of life and death, and the other was the soldiers who died on the front line when the war came. When the war spread, the soldiers still did not hesitate to face the artillery fire. That's why there is "China will not die", so there is the song of "China will not die, you see those 800 heroes fighting alone in the eastern battlefield". "Warriors" is also the title of my last volume, and in addition to the two main characters, the supporting characters have gradually become true warriors through the plot development of the previous volumes. They bathed in blood and chose to face their enemies head-on. As always, I chose important female characters to portray in the creative process, which is a little habit of mine. The supporting actresses in this article: You Yiman, Mu Qiuping, Qin Mingyue, each of them has a deep imprint, and each of them is willing to take up their own weapons to fight for their rights and interests. I write about them, and sometimes I write about myself—but they are far braver than I am.

Sometimes I wonder if I would have made the same choice as them if I were in that environment. Afraid of death? Why not be afraid, or why are you afraid? How can we endure it, how can we persevere? You Yiman's open-mindedness and letting go of the vicissitudes of life and only taking a scoop of drink; Qin Mingyue dissipated her unwillingness and hatred after careful consideration, and reconciled with herself step by step; Mu Qiuping seems to be the most decisive and free, but she also shows her self-destructive and pessimistic nature at the end point she chooses. I love them, these beautiful, amorous and full of life. They are fearless as wives, chiefs, warriors, mothers.

There are also those who sacrificed for lofty ideals: Lao Lu, Editor-in-Chief Hu, Xu Ruonong and his wife. And those who fought bloodily on the front lines. There are also those elegant scholars: Song Qi, Liang Qingwen and others. I am almost paranoid about using disaster and death to show their temperament. Although I always couldn't bear it, I was masochistic over and over again, typing out one character after another in this round trip.

And those children: Xinyi, Yaya, Xiaoqiang......

Peace does not come easily, and all hope ultimately falls on the next generation.

[three]

Now that I re-read the full article, I don't cry anymore. I did my best to write the story of "The Left Bow", and although it is still not the best at the moment, and there are more advanced ways of explaining it in many places, I still feel that this story has impressed me very much.

Thank you very much for seeing you here, I will continue to work hard to create, and through these exercises, the next book will move you even more.

Thank you.

Thanks for reading.

See you in the next book.