I tried to send some letters to my family and a few relatives to ask if the family had moved or what had happened, but nothing had been heard.

For the next period of time, with doubts, I began to take the initiative to find the truth.

At first I pretended to wander around the first floor during the day, but most of the time I sat on a bench by the doorway, and in order not to be obtrusive, I borrowed a few novels from the library and sat there to read. In fact, I was observing the situation in the pharmacy, and the position of the bench could see the situation around the pharmacy from a distance, and after more than a week of continuous observation, three patients were taken in by the doctor through the door like me, and the doctor left alone after ten minutes. And indeed, as Lao Li said, no patient was carried out of the inpatient building on a stretcher.

A week didn't explain anything, but I was afraid that staying there would attract unnecessary attention, so I went to the hospital's only entrance and exit for a week to observe, sitting on the grass and staring at it from afar.

I found that there were three types of cars coming in and out of the hospital, one was an ambulance, one was a hatchback, and one was a regular sedan.

As I continued to observe, hatchback trucks were used to transport goods, some of which were ingredients for canteens, and some of which were supermarket goods. There are not many cars coming in and out, which should be driven by doctors, or it is possible that the patient's family members are visiting.

Ambulances are used to transport patients, and I found that there are indeed only patients who are sent in, and patients who are not transferred out, and it is possible that the patients who have been discharged from the hospital have left directly in the car of their families. But in the week I observed, there were only two cars, and I walked around them, and they left with no new passengers.

Then I went back to the pharmacy and observed for a week, and it was the same as before, this week four patients went in and no patients came out.

I suspect that the patient came out either at night or there was another elevator that came down, and I didn't know where.

Although I never believed that Lao Li said that the patient was dismembered into pieces of meat and sent to the cafeteria, I was still a little scared in my heart, so one day when the truck came to deliver the ingredients, I deliberately pretended to help carry the things, and found an opportunity to rummage through the box, and there was indeed pork inside.

The fat of pork and mutton is white, the fat of beef and people is yellow, don't ask me how do you know that human fat is yellow, if you are not afraid, you can look for pictures on the Internet, or take a white napkin and put your fingernails against the nose to make a sassafras, and then observe the color of the grease on the paper.

After two months of continuous observation, I finally came to the following conclusions:

1. It is true that the patients in this hospital can only enter and cannot leave, and the patients are indeed gone.

2. During the day, I can only see the patient go up to the 15th floor, and never come down.

3. Some patients never came down after going up to the 15th floor.

4. Some patients should have been sent back late at night, such as myself.

5. The patient who did not come down has either been living on it or has died in an accident.

6. The patient's body was either frozen or crushed and washed down the drain.

It's terrifying!

I don't want to draw such conclusions, but from all the signs I have observed, this hospital is by no means a normal psychiatric hospital.

After coming to my conclusions, I began to become extremely sensitive, and the already familiar surroundings became extremely unfamiliar, and a sense of fear hung over me.

During this period, I also had a thought that I should not have, that is, I had been sold to the hospital for experiments by my parents because they had no money for treatment, because I didn't have to pay a penny for treatment, is there such a thing in the world? For those patients who have disappeared, doesn't the hospital know that sooner or later their families will come to pick them up? Why is the hospital not afraid? Why is there no family member who has never come here to pick up the patient?

The thought of this possibility makes me extremely painful, although I have been causing trouble for my family, I can't even get a diploma from college, and I have made myself mentally ill after a few days of falling in love, but I can't sell me to the hospital!

When I was a child, they still loved me very much, and I was their only child.

The world can't and won't have such ruthless parents, my parents pulled me up with such a handful of and urine, even if they really treated me like this, I have no right to hate them, everything is the result of my own making.

Thinking of this, I can't help but think of Xiao Wei, how is she now, maybe she has fallen in love with other men. Although she promised that I would never fall in love with another man in my life, I may have gone to other men's beds at this time, and I can't help but have a strong hatred for her, if she hadn't taken the initiative to take care of me and leave so ruthlessly, I wouldn't have fallen to this.

It didn't take long for me to find that I had a problem with my sleep, that is, I would suddenly wake up in the morning, and I looked at the time at 4 or 5 o'clock, and if I went to bed at 10 o'clock at night, I would generally wake up at 6-7 o'clock the next day, and I would wake up at 8 o'clock if I was lazy.

After waking up early, the sky is not yet bright, so you can only go back to sleep, and it is easy to have continuous dreams in a daze, which leads to listlessness after waking up, and you have no energy to do things all day.

I went to the clinic to see other doctors, and I wanted to prescribe some sleeping pills, but the doctor listened to my condition, told me that it was a symptom of depression, and prescribed me a lot of oral pills.

Isn't depression the disease that makes you want to commit suicide all day long when you have this disease?

Also, the way I am now, there is not much point in living.

It was much later that I realized that depression is a disease that "suppresses depressed feelings". You can't get depressed just because you're depressed, and you can't get depressed if you do the action of suppression.

When I had doubts about my parents, the feeling of abandonment produced a strong depression, and I did not release these emotions by crying or getting angry, but then I thought that they worked so hard, as a son, I shouldn't blame my parents, don't they all say that the son of man should be filial?

As a result, my concept of "filial piety" pressed those doubts about my parents and depression into my subconscious, and then I had depressive symptoms. After suffering from depression, due to poor rest and poor spirit, it will lead to the whole person's state getting worse and worse, and there will be more and more unsatisfactory things, and more depressed emotions will accumulate, and if these emotions are pressed into the subconscious, it will lead to the occurrence of severe depression.

Once severely depressed, the whole person's mental energy can basically no longer support him to survive in this world, so the patient will be bent on seeking death.

Modern medical science is to treat the symptoms of treatment, or by taking blocking drugs, blocking the painful nerves to work, and taking drugs similar to the effect of drugs, so that patients can experience the feeling of happiness, and some are the electroconvulsive therapy that I have experienced once and never want to do again, but the electroconvulsive therapy in a regular hospital is anesthetized, and the pain is not as great as mine.

None of these can really cure depression, it just paralyzes the brain so that it can't have any more attacks, and to really cure depression, you must uproot your own concept of depression.

Well, now back to my story, I didn't know anything at the time, except to add another kind of suffering for no apparent reason.

I started thinking about how to get out of this hospital.

I went to Lao Li again to hear his opinion, he used to say that those people were made into human meat buns, and now it seems that there is no essential difference between me and I think those people were washed into the sewer by broken corpses, maybe I am really as crazy as him.

I found him again in the billiard room.

When he saw that I had a sad face and no energy at all, he put down the pole in his hand and walked over to me.

"What's wrong, Xiao Wu. ”

"It's annoying. ”

"Be happy! Learn from me, why do you want to do so much!"

"I want to get out. ”

At this time, his expression became serious, and he looked at me for a while.

Then he said to me, "I used to be like you, and I tried to run away. But then I figured it out, what can I do when I go out? When I go outside, I still have to work tirelessly to make money, all kinds of troubles, how can I have a good life here now?"

"Aren't you afraid that one day you'll be made into buns?" I asked him.

At this time, he looked around, leaned closer and whispered to me, "Xiao Wu, I'll tell you another secret!"

Then he put his mouth on my ear.

"Do you know why I said I knew you were going to come back that day?"

"Why?"

"Because I think you're good!" he said to me as he stepped away and swore to me.

"Does it matter if people are good and people are bad?"

"Of course! As far as I've observed, for so many years, there are basically few people who have a bad temper and are difficult to get along with, and they have rarely come back after going up once. People with a good temper like you, although there are some who don't come back, but many can come back. ”

"Huh?" he said so strangely.

"As far as I can tell, the grumpy people, after suffering on it, will definitely scold the nurses, and the nurses will cut them into buns. So have you noticed that I've been a vegetarian?" he smirked, and then continued, "So since you've been up once, it's basically safe to come down again, and don't lose your temper and annoy them if you go up again." ”

He patted me on the shoulder and went back to playing his billiards.

Alas, is this old man crazy?