Parents are here, there is still a place to come in life, parents go, and there is only a way back in life.

One day in May 2008, the rainy season had long passed, and the sky had no intention of sneezing and raining, and the scorching sun was scorching the Loess Plateau in the northwest, and the sorghum and corn that farmers had cultivated before and after Qingming were haggard in the fields due to lack of moisture.

The mountains are continuous, the ravines are vertical and horizontal, and there are only two colors in the whole world as far as the eye can see, the sky blue above the head, and the earth yellow under the feet, and the deep mountains in the evening often give people a kind of isolation and loneliness.

People and livestock who have lived in the mountains for generations have long been accustomed to the harsh climate, arid air, and barren land, and the wish of most young people and children is to hope that one day they will be able to get out of this poor mountain area, and if they can not come back, they will not return.

Therefore, going out to work and going to college has become their only way out.

And education has always been the most likely way for people at the bottom of society to climb to the upper class.

One day in May 2008, Wen Xiaoguo was sitting in the classroom of the third year of junior high school, intently writing class notes, from primary school to junior high school, although he spent one-third less time than most of his classmates in academics, but his test scores were few opponents. He was suddenly picked up from school in a hurry by his aunt and his father's comrades-in-arms from the neighboring village.

His father was in the army all the year round, and he lived in his aunt's house for most of his childhood, because Wen Xiaoguo was born in the wing room on the west side of his aunt's yard, until he was 12 years old and went to the junior high school in the town to start the boarding life of the school, although the word father seemed to be just a noun and a title in his previous life, but when he saw his father's urn covered with the national flag, he still understood that he had completely lost something.

Later, when I was in Wenyang High School, I chatted and told jokes with Chen Wen, Liu Jun and others in the dormitory at night, and the top bunk said:

"A foreigner mathematician asked a Chinese college student, there is an earthquake in a place, there are 10 people trapped inside, there may be a more serious landslide at any time, at this time there are 3 Chinese rescuers, and how many people may die in the end?

The student said, "Only three people will die at most." ”

Foreigner mathematicians say that students don't understand mathematics,

The student said: "You don't understand the Chinese soldiers! ”

When the other children in the dormitory laughed and fell asleep happily, only Wen Xiaoguo secretly cried in the bed for half the night.

Of course, that's an afterthought.

At this time, Wen Xiaoguo leaned on his aunt's arms and wept silently, at this moment, his heart was more painful than wandering alone for the rest of his life.

The aunt mourned her brother with all her might, while stroking her nephew whom she had always loved, the aunt was already an old man, full of silver hair, with a bow on her back, and four sons in the family, her eldest grandson was two years older than Wen Xiaoguo, and the aunt watched Wen Xiaoguo grow up day by day from birth to day, and she was almost to the age of the waning mountains, and at this moment her heart was more painful than the unfortunate sacrifice of her brother was to pity her nephew who was not yet an adult.

In the evening, there were more and more people in Wen Xiaoguo's family, and the neighbors in the village, distant relatives, township officials, village chiefs and clerks blocked this dilapidated earthen house that was closed and locked on weekdays, and they all discussed and discussed the future days of this family, which is actually the life of this 15-year-old boy alone.

Wen Xiaoguo has never seen so many people crowded at home, and he has not said a word since he returned home, and his heart is inexplicably churning with great fear and loneliness, the more people there are, the stronger this feeling becomes. He ran out of the mountains without everyone noticing, although he didn't know where to go, he just ran wherever he felt that there was no one, and ran wherever he was farther away from home.

He didn't want to see the noisy appearance of his family, he had never experienced it, and he didn't want to experience it, tears poured out of the corners of his eyes and hit his ears backwards, and he was thrown to the ground behind him by the wild running. For the first time in his life, he tried to escape from one thing, from one place, from his own home.

How long and how far you have run, although there is a limit to human physical fitness, the soul is far from it.

Wen Xiaoguo meandered step by step along the bare mountain range behind the village, the setting sun stretched his figure to the east longer and longer, he gasped for breath, kept choking, the more he gasped, the more he choked, the more he choked on tears, his chest was burning like fire, his ears were buzzing, he couldn't hear anything except his cough and his trembling heartbeat, even if he could clearly feel the cold wind on the mountain roaring through his palm.

His steps became slower and more messy, and the green tendons between his foreheads bulged, and when he turned to look back for the first time, he saw that his home under the mountain was so far away, so small, and his heart was relieved, and he fell headlong on the mountainside.

After Wen Xiaoguo fell asleep, he dreamed of his father in a daze,

I dreamed that I was held high above my head by my father when I was a child, and it felt like the closest I was to the sky.

I dreamed that my father went home to visit relatives and bought himself a lot of canned food, a whole row of Wahaha, a comic book "Father and Son", and a "Good Essay 300 Words".

I dreamed that when my father went back to the army, Wenyang was held in my aunt's arms, and my father leaned out of the car window to kiss his face constantly, and my father kept wiping his tears. He clearly heard his father say to his aunt:

"Sister, I left my most important thing here......"

Kewen Xiaoguo couldn't see that face clearly.

By the time he came to his senses, the sunset was gone, there was only a glimmer of afterglow left in the sky, there were already a little lights in the village below the mountain, and the smoke of cooking was still rising from the chimneys of the kitchens. He didn't feel the infinitely good sunset depicted in the Chinese textbook at all, just the smell of near dusk.

It's the loneliness of being abandoned by the world,

It is the twilight of the mountains and the desolation of the cold white houses.

He turned over and collapsed on the hillside, staring blankly at the darkening sky and the moon growing in obscurity, he heard the evening breeze blowing in his ears, and he heard the wailing of the cows and sheep and the barking of the dogs in the village below. He heard many people shouting his name at the bottom of the mountain.

Maybe he used to wish that many people cared about him, but now no matter how many people call him home, it is not as good as a person calling him by his name.

He finally cried out, and he gave his body to the ground below him, howling wildly at the sky in front of him. Except for the echo of the barren mountains to himself, no one will respond to him anymore.

At this time, Wen Xiaoguo would not have thought that when he had the opportunity to call his father again, he would wait for ten years.