My personality has changed.

My change should have been after I went to Dongmen that summer, it was my parents who made me break my promise, because I kept promising Hao Junqi that I would go to see her the next summer, and my parents let me not even have a chance to explain to her.

After returning to Hua'an from the East Gate, I began to become silent. I suddenly lost interest in learning, strictly speaking, in doing everything.

I repeated the fifth grade when I started school. My parents' intentions were obvious, hoping that I would lay a solid foundation, but I couldn't raise the motivation to study, so my father became anxious, and after I failed a small test, he began to intervene in my study, and formulated a strict study plan for me, always trying to find some materials to strengthen my training.

Although I was very disgusted, because my father was very strict, he would scold me and scold me if he didn't like it, and I didn't dare to take it lightly, let alone fight him. So I was in a lot of pain.

I remember one time when I came home half an hour late, and in order to teach me a lesson, he extended his evening study time by a full hour. I grumbled, threw my pen in protest, and in a fit of rage, he punished me for kneeling in the living room.

I don't know how long I knelt down, but I only knew that when I was "released" later, it was difficult to even stand up, and I felt that my knee was no longer my own knee. He stayed by my side like a nervous person, and when I moved the slightest, he reprimanded me.

My mother felt sorry for me and persuaded my father, but my father said angrily: "How did you become a teacher? I'm educating my children, and you even say I'm too strict. If your child's grades fall and you don't catch it, do you want him to be a hooligan in the future? ”

My mother was so choked by my father that she couldn't say a word. Actually, my mother is a very weak person, and she has always been obedient to my father, although she is also a teacher, but I think she is like a student in front of my father.

I'm worried about Hao Junqi. I don't know where Uncle Hao Youde took her.

I guess Hao Junqi must be having a bad time. My mother is dead, my grandfather is dead, and I live in a foreign country, how can I live a good life? Will Uncle Hao take her along the road to beg? As soon as this thought flashed into my brain, it lingered. And my tears flowed.

At this time, it may be that when the Chinese teacher was reciting "Farewell Kangqiao" sensationally, he called me up and asked me why I was so moved, I choked up and couldn't speak, tears were still flowing, and the teacher sighed, saying that only Zheng Qihang understood the parting feelings expressed in the poem.

At this time, it may also be when the math teacher is teaching the proportional equation, she calls me up and asks me why I am crying, I choked up and couldn't speak, the tears are still flowing, and the teacher is also embarrassed, saying that he has never met a student who has shed tears because of learning proportional equations in his life.

At this time, it is more likely that when my father punished me for kneeling in the living room, my mother saw it and hid to the side to wipe her tears, and my father saw it and reprimanded me - do you know that tears? Knowing that if you cry, you will get home on time (or finish your homework on time)!

……

The year of fifth grade passed like this. Because of my father's strict discipline, although I was tired of studying, I successfully entered the school where my father taught, Hua'an No. 2 Middle School, with very good grades. This made my father feel a sense of accomplishment.

However, what my father didn't expect was that in the year when I was in junior high school, Hua'an No. 2 Middle School and Hua'an No. 1 Middle School were all transferred to Hua'an No. 3 and Hua'an No. 4 Middle School, and the high schools of the two schools were merged into Hua'an No. 1 and Hua'an No. 2 Middle School.

In other words, I can read without my father's nose. This really makes me so happy.

The school I was assigned to was Hua'an No. 4 Middle School. This middle school is on Chang'an Road, and it takes nearly half an hour to take a bus from my house, and I have to change buses halfway. But the middle school was very close to my grandmother's house.

My grandmother is an internist in Hua'an Fourth Hospital, a well-known and capable doctor, the backbone of the department, but also a very domineering woman.

She said that she was capable, and that she was able to get a special car to pick us up when my parents and I left the East Gate and went back to the city in those days. Saying that she was domineering, when my mother and father were in love, she did not agree to it, and she also instructed my uncle to beat my father.

In my grandmother's family, many people have to look at her face and act, in other words, my grandmother has the final say in many things.

However, my grandmother was a hard-working woman. Her only son, the same uncle who went to the east gate to beat my father, died on the operating table because of an operation.

This incident almost broke my grandmother's spirit. This was a medical accident, but in order to maintain the reputation of the hospital, the hospital negotiated with my grandmother and did not disclose it to the outside world. Therefore, all the relatives of my grandmother or my uncle's friends got the news that my uncle suddenly fell ill and died because he could not be rescued in time.

What is particularly tragic is that when my uncle died, he didn't even talk about a girlfriend, let alone save a queen for his grandmother. In this way, my grandmother focused all her love on me and cared for me.

My father, as a poor teacher, had no status in my grandmother's eyes, especially since she always thought that my father had seduced my mother by improper means. After my uncle died, she began to control my family. For example, the house that Hua'an No. 2 Middle School gave to my parents was obtained by my grandmother through various relationships.

Originally, how could you, a new teacher who had just returned to the city and had just been assigned to the school, have a house allocation? You know, at that time, how many couples who had been married for a long time still lived in the school's bachelor dormitory. Grandma, she has this ability. And all the money my father used to renovate the house was also paid by my grandmother.

I didn't feel this delicate relationship in my family at the time, what I could feel was that my grandmother doted on me.

My grandmother's pampering of me—no, complete doting—fostered my rebellion and gave me the strength to rebel against my father. In fact, in the next two years, I became more and more rebellious and stubborn, all thanks to my grandmother. My grandmother was my strong backing for my father's rebellion.

I was assigned to study at Hua'an No. 4 Middle School, and this geographical relationship determined that I had to spend noon at my grandmother's house. And this is what my father is most unwilling to do. I remember that in the first year when my father and I returned to the city, our whole family lived at my grandmother's house, and my father was angry with my mother behind my back because my grandmother doted on me, and my father even beat my mother because of this.

The best way to show my grandmother's affection for me is that she constantly gives me pocket money, as long as I reach out to her to ask for money, she will give as much as I want. If I hadn't asked her for money for a while, she would call me to my side and say, "Set sail, my precious grandson, why don't you ask your grandmother for money?" ”

My grandmother is different from others, she doesn't call me nephew, she calls me grandson.

"My father didn't allow me to ask my grandmother for money. He knew that if I asked my grandmother for money, he would punish me for kneeling in the living room. "I deliberately mentioned that my father had punished me for kneeling in the living room.

"Next time he's going to let you kneel again, and I won't criticize him. What do children spend a few dollars on, and they don't spend it indiscriminately. Is the baby grandson spending money indiscriminately? ”

"Nope. Set sail has always been a good child, never spending money indiscriminately. "I deliberately picked up what my grandmother liked to hear.

Naturally, my grandmother was very happy to hear this, and I naturally got another pocket money.

In addition, what my grandmother couldn't accept was my father's persecution of me to study. Maybe it's a doctor, she pays more attention to my physical health, she always emphasizes physical health first, academic performance second. In her opinion, if a person does not have a strong physique, everything else is empty, no matter how good it is.

Therefore, the most unacceptable thing for my grandmother is that my father does not let me go to bed on time because I can't finish my homework. My grandmother even quarreled with my father because of this. The result of the quarrel is almost always the defeat of the father, after all, the father is a junior, and the most important thing is that when the father insists repeatedly, the grandmother will appear hysterical. Seeing my father's face flushed with anger, I ducked aside to steal the fun. At this time, the mother's life became difficult.

Discussions went and went, and needless to say, it was the grandmother who won over the parents. I was able to spend noon at my grandmother's house.

It was one of the happiest times. My grandfather picked me up from school, and then I lay on the couch, munching on apples or grapes that my grandmother had brought me in time, and instructed my grandfather to go to the TV and search for cartoons or children's programs that I liked to watch.

My grandfather's schoolbag was just an ornament. My grandfather would occasionally ask me to do some homework, but I always refused to read books and write homework on the grounds that "I finished writing at school" or "I didn't have homework at noon". If my grandfather had said something serious, my grandmother would have come forward. As soon as my grandmother came forward, my grandfather didn't say anything.

The head teacher of my class was a middle-aged woman in her forties. She is very strict, but she never physically punishes students, and she has her trick of educating students, which is "small chat" - small chats for a while.

When she felt the need to call someone to her office when someone had done something wrong, that classmate was miserable. She will talk to you for a lesson or even a lesson or two about a mistake you made. You stand in front of her and are submissive, and she talks bitterly from the ideal, from the outlook on life and the world, and finally returns to why you speak in class, what are the harms of speaking in class, and so on.

The worst thing is that she likes to repeat, a sentence, repeat and repeat, say and say, you can hear calluses, and she repeats patiently. Your only prayer at that time is that her nagging will end quickly, and when she finally says, "That's it for today, you can go back to class," and you will be as happy as a person who has been sentenced to death to receive a pardon for a capital crime, or as if you had escaped from a cage.

Therefore, in the first semester of the first semester of junior high school, when she was in charge of the class, my class was still normal, and no one caused anything to the class.

In the second semester, this teacher did not come, and she fell ill. She actually got stomach cancer. She never drinks and never stays up late, and she really surprised us that she got stomach cancer. Later, we thought that her stomach cancer must have come from hunger, and it was from talking to us. Because of her selfless talk, or noon or night, she couldn't eat on time, and after a long time, stomach cancer came out.

After making this assumption, those of us who she often called to talk to each other felt guilty that we were the executioners who killed the teacher.

In the second semester, a male teacher of 25 or 6 years old took over as the head teacher. He is a young teacher who has only been working for two or three years. He was swimming in the ocean of love when he accepted the task of managing our class—he was in a passionate relationship with his girlfriend, so he didn't have much time and energy to manage our class.

The arrival of this class teacher stimulated our "vitality". We are not only active outside of class, but also in class, talking, eating bits and pieces, passing notes, reading novels, and doing everything.

I don't like to talk very much, but I'm good at listening, the big fat man, Brother Jun, and the "stinky salted eggs" like to tell me everything, they even changed places to me and rushed to tell me the latest news they learned about inside and outside the school, I learned through them that there are "Four King Kongs" and "Eight Arhats" on the street, and I also know what "Green Dragon Gang" and "Lion Group" the school has established.

Actually, it's not that I don't know that the reason why they are so close to me is that they are completely interested in the money in my pocket. Everyone in my class knew I was a very generous person. I often "tip" them. These "bounties" are very important to them when they are in need, and they can use them to buy cigarettes to overcome their addiction.

Here I want to start by talking about my three sworn friends.