Qin Sen simply rejected me, "Impossible. ”

I looked up at him, I knew where my advantages were, and I would also make a very pitiful begging appearance, but at this moment, I couldn't make any expressions, "Qin Sen, didn't you say that we are friends." ”

He nodded, "Yes, but I can't help you and Lu Er, I'm sorry." ”

I nodded, understood, there is no need to beg anymore, Qin Sen is my friend and has helped me a lot, but compared to Lu Er, he will always be loyal to Lu Er.

Lu II.

Lu Er......

"Bao Si, I hope you're doing well."

Qin Sen seemed to be showing mercy to me, did he think that I was too pitiful at this moment.

"Since Lu Er has remembered everything, he must have thought about it more, if he let his godmother know that Uncle Shen had been treated at your house at the beginning, it would be very troublesome, so I don't think this result is bad."

I lowered my eyes and saw very clearly the tears falling on my white cloth shoes one by one.

"All I care about is whether he likes me or not......"

"Don't be so naïve, okay?"

Qin Sen was helpless, "Like is not love, you are so young, what do you know." ”

Oh, I understand what.

I understand that Lu Pei's heart will beat faster when he holds me, I understand that he likes the way he looks at me, what do I know, I understand that he cares about me, it's as simple as that.

"Are you listening to me, Bao Si, don't do stupid things, you know, you still have ...... in the future"

"Don't talk about it."

I interrupted him lightly, took a deep breath and took out a box from my schoolbag and handed it to him, "I gave you, watch, thank you for telling me how to crack the beauty body at that time, thank you for everything." ”

I bought two pieces, one for Han Lin, and one for Qin Sen, but when I gave Han Lin, I deliberately picked a sports one, and Qin Sen, I picked a black belt watch, I saw that Lu Pei was wearing it like this, so when I bought it, I wanted to pick like this.

He was stunned, "This ......"

I lowered my eyes and didn't look at him, and stuffed the box into his hand, "I don't know any brand, but this watch is more than a thousand, for me, it is very expensive, I think maybe you are like my father, you all wear tens of thousands of watches, but I don't have that ability, what I can do is to do my best to thank you, accept it." ”

After saying that, I bowed to him, "Thank you." ”

Qin Sen was a little confused when he held the watch, "Bao Si, even if you are like this, it is impossible for me to tell you where Lu Er lives." ”

I suddenly wanted to laugh, how deep do they think so deeply.

Forcibly tugging the corners of his mouth, he looked at Qin Sen and shook his head, "I don't need you to tell me, I understand you, okay, I'm just grateful to you, thank you for taking care of me...... Good bye. ”

"Bao Si!"

When he opened the door, he called out to me from behind, "Let's go after eating." ”

I looked back at him, and he was smiling hard, "I thank you for the gift, I like it very much, we are still friends, let's have a meal together." ”

"Nope."

I replied softly, "I have to save my own life, or I won't be able to do anything." ”

Empty.

My mind is empty.

I leaned on the handle of the stairs and went downstairs, and after going out, I felt the sun was dazzling, and I raised my hand slightly to cover it, my life is so hard, how could I not knock Lu Er?

Taking the bus home, I didn't forget to send a text message to Pang Bi, I said that I would ask for something tomorrow morning, please send it to me.

Returning home in a trance, after entering the door, I went to find a mineral water bottle, drew the scale, and then cut it in half with scissors, stood on the coffee table and put it away, the paper cutter rattled out the blade, I looked at my right hand, the blade was on the middle finger, and it still fell on the ring finger.

The ring finger is the most inflexible finger of humans, but it is called nameless, in order to one day engrave the name of the other half.

I didn't have a ring with me, but I think bloodletting was something that impressed me.

A knife down, I don't know if it's the reason for the speed of the knife, it's not very painful, the blood is dripping towards the mineral water bottle, there is red blood, and there is a transparent liquid, I watched it for a long time, and wondered, how can my blood flow out of the transparent, it took a while to understand that it was me crying.

Looking at the bleeding fingers and laughing like a fool, he inexplicably remembered that I was squatting and falling asleep in front of his house, he woke me up with the car whistle, and asked me innocently if it hurt to be slapped in the face by myself......

Even if he doesn't know me anymore, he still has feelings for me, I don't know, I just have that confidence, I think he will definitely take me in and help me, even if I have cursed him with very vicious words, I don't really hate him.

It seemed like it was fast, but I felt like I had waited a long time, a long time for him to say he liked me, but how long we had been together, one day, one night, a phone call that didn't hang up.

That's the end of it, didn't you say that you will be responsible for a lifetime, I died in Zhou's hands a few days ago, and that's a lifetime, okay!

When I came back to my senses, the blood had far exceeded the scale, much lighter than the usual blood, there were a lot of tears in my eyes, I pulled the corners of my mouth and smiled, treacherous and sad, "How good, where do you need to pick the tears of sadness, I have them with a little help......"

At night, my mother still didn't come back, I was alone, wrapped my fingers, instant noodles, but I couldn't swallow when I ate, forced myself to eat, swallowed heavily, closed my eyes and slept, I had to live, this is my little idea, if I fell, I was afraid that everything would get out of control.

……

When Pang Pan found my house according to the address of my text message, I opened the door for her like a ghost, and her smiling face froze in an instant, panicking, "Bao Si, what's wrong with you?!" Arm who hurts! ”

I didn't speak, I took her arm and entered the door until I walked into the door of my house, did not give her room to comment on my house, and was dumbfounded, leaning my face on her warm shoulder, "Fatty, I envy you, you know what." ”

Pang was a little stunned, she looked at me ignorantly, "Baosi, are you leaving, your mother said you and beat you." ”

I still shook my head, my eyes open, tears flowing, my arms around her body, cold, cold since last night.

"Why are you so tired of living......"

She didn't dare to ask again, and comforted me incoherently, "Bao Si, don't think too much, didn't you tell me that no matter what happens, there is no hurdle that you can't overcome, stay in the green mountains, don't be afraid of no firewood, oh, what am I talking about...... Bao Si, what the hell happened to you? ”

I wiped my tears and looked at her with a smile on the corners of my mouth, "You're right, keep Qingshan here, I'm not afraid of no firewood, I'm still here, it's okay...... Come, let me look at the locusts, you still know how to pierce the eyes of mineral water bottles, it's good, it's all alive, it's good. ”

Pang looked at me with some complications, "Bao Si, I'm very scared of you like this, you don't have any blood on your face, and your arms are scratched so hard, who did it." ”

"The cat scratched it, the cat went crazy, and suddenly scratched me, it's okay, the scab is about to fade."

I relaxed my tone a little, and continued to think about what she brought me, feeling that it was all complete, and then raised my face and sniffed and looked at her with a smile, "It's all done, let's go to the market to buy loaches, if you want to live, you can pick them for me, okay." ”

Put on the long sleeves, I pulled Pang Pan to the market, along the way I knew that she had a lot of questions to ask, but I interrupted, until I finished buying things and I sent her to the station again She couldn't help but say, "Bao Si, are you out of love." ”

I laughed, very tired, "No, how could I fall out of love when I'm so young and so cute." ”

Pang Bei's eyes were a little distressed, "Don't be so embarrassed about yourself, if you are not happy to tell me, I can help you, as long as I can help, I will definitely help." ”

I pursed my lips and smiled and nodded, "Well, I will." ”

……

It's going well, as long as I calm down and do anything, I think it will be very smooth, my mother rushed back when she got my call, originally said to work overtime, I said don't add it, it's not easy to get the locust dead, she was happy over there immediately, said okay, I'll be back immediately.

I sat on the bed and waited, looking at the second hand of the clock little by little, at eight o'clock in the evening, my mother entered the door, and was still startled when she saw the locusts, "So many!" ”

"...... that doesn't hurt"

I explained in a dumb voice, and my mother came back to her senses, but she looked at me with a little surprise, "Baosi, why are your eyes so swollen, haven't you slept well these nights." ”

"Well, a little insomnia."

Mom nodded, looked at me with some guilt and sighed, "Worry about my business, it's all my mother's fault." ”

I still laughed, very fake, I only saw my eyes and didn't see the long sleeves I was wearing, don't you think it's strange, in the middle of summer in August, I wrapped myself so tightly at home.

But I didn't ask, I thought, in my mother's heart, she may love me and my father, but more importantly, love herself.

No matter how good it is, you should love yourself more, and those who have the ability should only toss others and protect yourself.

I asked my mother to lie down on the bed first, and when I lifted her clothes, I couldn't help retching when the black and purple flesh skin was lumpy into my eyes, and a lot of yellow and white pus, accompanied by an indescribable stench, kept wafting towards my nose.

Mom was cautious, "Isn't it serious?" ”

I held my breath and poured all the locusts on it, "It's okay,"

Grasshoppers don't like to burrow into it very much, it seems that they also know that the smell is different, but they have an irresistible instinct, squirming, or little by little into their mother's meat, I don't open my eyes, I can't look anymore, there is nothing in the stomach, and the feeling of spitting acid water is not very good.

"Hizz~"

Mom was a little surprised, "I actually feel pain." ”

I smiled perfunctorily, "That's a good thing, come, swallow the loach now, and I'll have to take other medicine later......"

Mom didn't want to swallow it, but when she looked at my eyes, she still lifted her breath and grabbed the twisted loach and swallowed it into her mouth, covering her mouth, her expression was wrinkled, and she swallowed it hard.

Until she swallowed everything I had bought into her stomach, my mother was sweating profusely and looked at me as if she had just finished a big battle, "What else to eat." ”

I motioned for her to stand with her back to me, and saw that the locusts were all a few sizes bigger, which was full, and found a lighter, and then scraped it with a knife, and the bloodshot locusts fell one after another.

Mom began to cry out for pain, which is a good omen, knowing that it hurts, it means that the old tree is about to sprout.

After the locust came down, my mother's back began to bleed bright red blood, I grabbed a handful of grass clippings and smeared it on her wound, this grass is a grass, this thing does not hurt when it sucks blood, the pain is also prickly, because it will release something similar to an anesthetic in the process of sucking blood.

But after falling, the wound is easy to bleed, and I have to take this into account, so I asked Pang to get the grass, I saw my grandmother get it when I was a child, and this thing has a good effect on stopping bleeding.

I was busy for a long time, but unfortunately my mother didn't ask, otherwise I really want to explain this grass to her.

I saw that her face was not very good, and she must have been sad after swallowing several loaches raw, so I asked her to continue to eat these powdered herbs, poisonous spiders, centipedes, scorpions, snake gall bladder......

The taste was very strong, and my mother hesitated with a spoon for a long time and didn't dare to put it in her mouth, I was a little anxious, "Eat, it's okay." ”

I'm embarrassed to say that this thing is not much better than her rotten meat, and my stomach is pumping when I think about it now.

Mom gritted her teeth, took a big gulp and sent it into her mouth, kept drinking water to send, tears came out of her eyes, I think she suffered a little loss, it was all a sin, row, after the attack was supplemented, it was a dog brain, my mother shook her head and said that I couldn't eat this, I said I had to eat, "For your own future, come to this point, you have to eat if you don't eat." ”

I thought I was very calm, but my mother looked at me with a complicated look, and after a few bites, she couldn't help retching a few times, wiped her mouth and asked me, "Baosi, are you very angry with me and feel a little despised by me?" ”

Turn around. I'm going to get a towel, the last step is completed, this beauty is a body, the bet is placed, whether it can be broken, it depends on the introduction.

"Mom, let's not talk about you, what I hope is to let it pass quickly, you and I want to forget these things quickly."

Mom looked at me, bit her lip, and nodded for a while, "Okay." ”

Putting her back on the bed, I asked her, stabbing out the six-character mantra or the town?

Mom said, six-word mantra.

I nodded and took out the blood in the refrigerator, a needle had been soaked in it all afternoon, my mother glanced at it, a little surprised, "Baosi, you put so much blood?" ”

"Well, not much, it's fine."

It's my blood and Lu Er's blood that are combined.

"Are you particular?"

"Exquisiteness is, love ......"

I said, and the hand that took out the needle paused for a moment, it was love, there was love blood, but Lu Er told me that I broke up, will the blood be love, I thought blankly, just right, you can also try, either I die with my mother, or, I indirectly spied on Lu Er's heart.

I wiped my mother's back with a towel, and the black rotten skin peeled off, revealing the bloodshot tender flesh, how good, my mother was going to be reborn.

With a tattoo in my hand, I whispered softly, "May you have all the blessings and longevity to be at ease, and may you have endless discernment to have mighty abilities...... May you get rid of all sicknesses and prolong your life...... May you cut off ignorance, hatred, miserliness, jealousy, and other disturbing roots......"

Mom's body trembled slightly, "Baosi, you're crying." ”

"No......"

She looked sideways at me, "I feel it." ”

I tugged at the corners of my mouth and sniffed softly, "I'm just happy." ”

In fact, where do you need to deliberately take the tears of injury, I found that I couldn't control myself from crying.

Finish stabbing.

I smeared the blood all over my mother's back, and I told her that it would take a long night, and when it was completely soaked, she could wash it down tomorrow morning, "When you wash it, you should be gentle, don't use shower gel, the dead skin on the back will peel off, and it will hurt if the chemical irritation is done." ”

Mom nodded, looked at me and said thank you, I didn't want to listen to this, said I was tired, let Mom go to bed early, and when she got back to the hut, I packed my things and lay down on the bed with my legs curled.

It's as simple as that, once I thought that if everything goes well, I must call Lu Er after the stab, and tell him excitedly that I have taken another step on the road to entering Mr.!

But now, when I took out my phone, I still sent a text message to that number, 'I gave people a broken beauty, you say, your blood, is it sentient blood, if not, I will die.' ’

He didn't reply.

I closed my eyes and forced myself to sleep.

Three days later, my mother called me at work, and her voice couldn't suppress the surprise, "Bao Si, the scab has fallen off!" The skin is flat! In the past two days, I have always vomited for no reason, and the things that I spit out are black like foam, and now I think, it must be detoxification, Bao Si, Mom is finally getting better, I finally don't have to suffer so much anymore! ”

I squeezed my phone hard until I put down the phone, but I couldn't spit out a word, my mother was still saying that I was her lucky star, but I was too repulsive, I didn't want to listen.

It's just mom, okay, isn't it.

There is love blood, Lu Er, you are a liar.

The school started early, I still carried my schoolbag to report as usual, Pang looked at me cautiously and asked me how I was feeling, I looked at her with a smile and said very good, I was fine.

It's really good, like a good look, and I'm grateful that I'll be pretending.

Except for the plummeting grades, I'm really good at everything, no, not all subjects are declining, my English is still good, I'm studying hard, memorizing, and doing some kind of preparation that I can't even explain.

When the head teacher called me to the office, I looked out the window at the big tree on the playground and lost my mind.

"Xue Zhi!"

The head teacher called my name to bring me back attention, and kept knocking my fingers on my paper, "What did you do, it's your third year of high school, your grades have dropped so much, don't you have a sense of crisis at all?" ”

The sense of crisis, the countdown to the college entrance examination that changes every day on the blackboard is quite a sense of crisis.

The head teacher said softly, "Xue Zhi, the teacher has always thought that you are very smart, and your grades have always been very stable, you tell me, recently, is there something at home, or, what is on your mind." ”

I shook my head, "No, I don't have anything on my mind, teacher, I just want to ask you, do you have to take the university entrance examination to be successful"

The head teacher was stunned for a moment, "Of course not, but taking the university entrance examination is a shortcut to success, your grades work hard, and it is no problem to get into a good university, the English teacher told me, saying that you have improved a lot recently, but you can't only improve the grades of one subject, your history is also ......"

"I can't remember."

I replied directly to the teacher's words, "I have memorized the farming economy for a long time, but I can't remember ......."

The head teacher took my hand, "Xue Zhi, the teaching director has always asked me to supervise you more, I know that she knows your father, and I also know that your father is a doctor, I think, your father is so good, you will not be bad, tell the teacher, is there a big fluctuation in thinking recently." ”

I pulled the corners of my mouth jerkily, "It's not fluctuating, I just don't have the heart to study, and I don't know if I want to go to university." ”

The head teacher was a little displeased, "I'm going to call your parents if you don't give up like this again, you know." ”

I nodded, "Teacher, I know it's wrong, I'll try to regulate my emotions and try to make you see progress in the next exam." ”

Walking back to the classroom, I tightened the top of the school uniform, it was a little cold, lying in the corridor and selling it would be stunned, the yellow leaves under the big tree, now in the morning, I will find hoarfrost, a ha, there is white fog, winter is coming.

"Bao Si!"

Pang ran over in a panic, "The teacher didn't say anything about you." ”

I looked at the playground and lost my mind, "No, isn't it just a little lower in the exam, it's okay." ”

On the first day of school, I saw Qin Sen's car at the school gate, and laughed twice in my heart, it was obvious that Lu Errang wanted to see if I would go to school.

I was waiting, waiting for him to appear, waiting for him to come out to find me, but as the days passed, he turned off the phone with the number I knew, silently, and I suddenly found that I was struggling to maintain this apparent peace.

Lu Er, can you resist not seeing me.

I know he's still here, I call Assistant Yang every day, if he doesn't answer, I'll call my eldest brother, and my eldest brother won't see him often, but it's not difficult to know if Lu Er is still in this city, I'm like a madman, immersed in the installed shell, ready to go.

"Bao Si, what's wrong with you, day by day you are getting more and more unenergetic, don't scare me so much, Eleven Han Lin come here, let's go out to play, you are like a soulless, you can't hear what you say, you don't know, when you leave, Han Lin has been watching you from behind!"

I was a little surprised, "When did Han Lin come over?" ”

Pang was speechless, "Last month, he came here during the eleventh holiday, and he specially bought you a big bear!" Have you forgotten! ”

Big Bear?

Oh, I just said that I woke up that morning and suddenly found a big bear from somewhere, and I was startled.

"Bao Si, don't we do this, you have something to say, don't hold it in your heart like this!"

"I'm fine."

I didn't have any heart to go back to work, lay on the table and began to sleep, Pang sighed next to me, "What's the matter, I don't know what to do when I see you like this." ”

I didn't respond, I seemed to be asleep in a trance, faintly, I heard the crying, rubbed my eyes and looked up, Tong Qianqian sat in her place and turned her head to look at me, red tears kept flowing down the corners of her eyes......

As soon as my body was agitated, I sat up straight suddenly, my eyes instinctively looked at Tong Qianqian's position, empty, at the beginning of school, the position that belonged to Tong Qianqian was always empty.