When Ren Zitao was preparing to train himself to become a boyfriend, Jiang Nan, who was far away from his hometown, was also very busy before the start of school, and he was mainly tired.

She accompanied her mother to the psychological clinic for the first time.

I don't feel like it's going to work.

In Jiang Nan's opinion, grandma and uncle's house moved here, and they were very happy to move firecrackers or something, but I don't know why, her mother couldn't stand it.

also scared her: "If you don't adjust it, you'll have to go crazy." ”

And Jiang Nan was standing in front of the Shanghai School Qu doctor at the moment, the first impression, the doctor's smile was very kind, the second impression was just an illusion, and it was not gentle at all.

Jiang Nan has a little opinion on this.

If you don't listen to how he healed the disease, can you know if it's worth spending so much money at once?

Alas, Jiang Nan sat on a bench in the corridor, cramming his feet improvised to read a chemistry workbook.

And Su Yuqin, who was in the consultation room, was excited again at this time and cried.

Su Yuqin looked very distressed and chattered:

"My mom and dad moved because of me.

In fact, I knew in my heart that they didn't want to leave the place where they had stayed for most of their lives, where there were old neighbors and friends for decades.

Before they moved, I didn't dare to go back, I was afraid that my father and mother would lie for me, I was afraid that I would have to put a smile on my face when I saw them, and I had to lie to those old neighbors and say: I moved to the city, and I was happy.

Doctors, people say that divorce is a pain of cramps and bones, because after so many years together, it is going to be broken, the passbook is separated, the house is separated, and the children belong to whom, the same two petals.

But I didn't really feel any pain, and now I realize that my parents had to bear all the cramps and bones, and they had to move for me.

They came here for me, moved to a new tunzi, didn't know the neighbors, and had to start everything from scratch.

You don't understand the countryside, everyone in the village is in groups, my mother doesn't even have a good sister to talk to, and my father's mouth is full of big bubbles.

Listening to my brother, the bubble on my father's mouth has never gone down, and he gave birth to me and raised me as an old man, and when I got divorced, he had to turn around and persuade me to be okay and give me support in the back.

How did I live such a failure, a handful of years.

I didn't dare to tell them, it's all like this, I still went to the man's father, and bought food for people twice in three days.

Woo, I'm afraid that they will scold me for not being angry, afraid that they will ask me what I want, I don't know, I don't know! ”

……

After the treatment, Jiang Nan found a separate opportunity to talk to Dr. Qu.

Dr. Qu told:

"Man, in your mother's case, the diagnosis and treatment process is simple and simple, but it is very complicated.

Let me tell you this: a person, she may be hindered by face, by the great principles of the world, by the theory of right and wrong that she has accepted since childhood, by the grievance of being treated unfairly, and by wanting to strive for the fairest result, etc., which will shackle her mind and make her choose what to do.

How to do it, how to do it is the most correct, in fact, it is separated from what she wants to do in her heart, which is two different things.

My treatment plan for her was to let her relax that tense nerve and do only what she wanted to do most.

But all the time, she was very resistant, and she was very serious against me, and she always had a lot of concerns.

When asked why, she told me:

When you choose A, she may feel sorry for you, when she chooses B, she will feel sorry for your grandparents, and when she chooses C, she will feel sorry for the people who have always been kind to her, such as your grandfather or your father.

Yes, there's your dad in there, too.

When your father expresses the greatest concern and kindness, she will compare those who are not good, and will think in a complicated way: compared to those who are more bad gay men, your father is good, and compared to the obvious shortcomings of some gay men in some aspects, your father is excellent, then, should you ease your attitude towards your father? Relaxation will not be looked down upon, and the nerves will be pulled on both sides.

You should be able to understand my example.

Look, every time her mind is always in such a cycle, imprisoned in it, only ignoring and suppressing the D answer she wants to choose the most in her heart.

And the worst thing now is that because your parents are divorced, the situation of the two families is more complicated than usual, because the perennial kinship is combined, and she will be in more such a state.

Every day, in everything, she is immersed in a large number of dilemmas, which makes her anxiety reach a peak, she will be discouraged and feel that life is very tired, because that is not what she wants, all the answers for others, so only medication is no longer effective. ”

After Jiang Nan heard this, her little face wrinkled, and she hurriedly said:

"I didn't let her choose for me, what can I do, I thought it would be better, doctor, really, I ......"

Jiang Nan was a little speechless.

"Uncle Qu, I understand what you mean, to put it bluntly, it's just to make her willful, right?

Actually, I've already let her run down this path, no, I've always encouraged her.

She wants to divorce and leave, she just wants to get back together now, and I absolutely respect it.

If necessary, she wants to escape from these cumbersome kinship, don't look at my young age, but I can really take my mother to live in a strange city, and it is no problem to transfer schools.

I've told her this a long time ago, what else do you think I'm going to do? ”

Dr. Qu shook his head, he sighed very emotionally in his heart, people live like this, where does the pressure come from? From the surrounding people.

"You see, your current state is going to put pressure on your mom.

First of all, as a daughter, you are great, even I know that.

However, when you are in a hurry and say that Mom and I have already done so much for you, and have made so many concessions, why don't you get better soon, this attitude lets her know that this counterexample is pressure.

Your mother will think, my daughter has done so much for me, then I should think more about her, and I should choose how my daughter likes me to do things.

When both parties are in a normal situation, the usual relationship is true, which is called understanding.

But your mother is sick, and you should have forgotten about it when you vented your negative emotions.

Including your father, I hope you can also communicate, don't talk about it, other people's lesbians have a more miserable life, and they are not as blessed as you, they have done so much for you, what do you want? If something like this is stressful, don't talk about it.

I answer this way, can you understand? ”

Jiang Nan nodded, and said a little sneeringly: "Then I understand, in fact, it is a bystander who is a fan of the parties, I am in a hurry, and I do bring out some of the words, alas." ”

Instead, Dr. Qu smiled:

"When a family member is sick, it is a tedious process of accompaniment, not to mention this kind of psychology, which will be longer.

But man, compared to your mother's first visit, I dare say, she will get better slowly, and it will get better and better every time.

You see, she now knows that she has taken the initiative to come to me, which shows that she also wants to redeem herself and no longer live so tired.

And when I give the answer she wants to do the most, she will do it, although she is happy and troubled at the same time, but do you feel that the area of happiness has become bigger and bigger. ”

Jiang Nan immediately nodded and said:

"Yes, yes, my mother is very talkative these days, even if life hasn't changed much, I feel that she is full.

I think women really love life, and the most important thing to see is whether they love to dress up, right? That's right, Uncle Qu, she's dressed up.

As a result, as soon as my grandfather's house moved in, she took sleeping pills last night, but she sat in the living room until dawn, and this morning I asked her to wear new clothes, and she said what to wear is not what to wear, and I felt that something was wrong. ”