47 jokes

Mu Zifei didn't know what Yang Shirt said, Mu Zifei said: "I have always lived with only two people, grandma, not as complicated as you said, and grandma's obsession with immortality is because of grandma's search tasks passed down from generation to generation, and grandma has never been able to find it, until she saw you, grandma recognized people very accurately, so she decided that you could help her find what she wanted." ”

Yang Shanxin said: "It seems that there is nothing wrong with the general direction of going through the hypnosis world again, and there are still many differences in the details." ”

Mu Zifei was suddenly very curious, she said, "Brother, how did you come up with that set of stories about me?" ”

Yang Shi had no choice but to say: "Isn't it all because of the powerful system in my head, the system deduces your past." ”

Mu Zifei said: "Although the system in your head is a little biased, there are also correct parts, such as starting to say that I am in the welfare society, and saying my childhood mentality, brother, it is really important, but the next things are a little ignorant, but I am very interested in listening, why not, brother, you can tell me about the past that you deduced in your head, okay?" ”

Yang Shi nodded and said, "I just told you that Mu Lanqi assigned you homework?" And this homework is different from the homework that the teacher assigns to the students at school, Mu Lanqing tells you to get up and wash up every day, and then go to a stone behind the house and touch it with your hands. That stone is a tombstone, there is a grave behind the house where you live, there is no grave, there is no inscription on the tombstone, Mu Lanqing asked you to touch the stone, and after touching it for a month, he told you that you are guarding the grave of the dead underground. ”

Mu Zifei listened attentively, as if listening to a story, she said: "Why didn't the dead man dare to erect a grave for him openly and honestly? We have been living in front of the grave like this, and we can still sleep that night? ”

Yang Shan said: "Of course, at the beginning, you really didn't dare to sleep for a few days at night, but you didn't have any other choice, and then you got used to it." It didn't take long for Mu Lanqing to increase your homework, every seven days, Mu Lanqing took you to stay up all night, she lit a lamp, the kind of lamp like an oil bottle, and took the three of you up the mountain, there is a fairy cave in the mountain, the hole is very small, you can only go in sideways, you have to walk a distance, the hole will become bigger, there is a statue in the hole, your homework is to kneel in front of the statue, Mu Lanqing teaches you to read some words, and let you memorize them, keep reciting, just like that, you have lived together for a year, but this year has just passed, You find that Xiao Fang and Xiao Ren are a little abnormal, they start sleepwalking when they sleep at night, and after that, the sleepwalking time becomes longer, and you find that as long as you stay up all night to go to the fairy cave, their sleepwalking time will become longer. ”

Mu Zifei was brought in by Yang Shanshu, she said: "Then we go to the statue and kneel down, and only read the things that we have memorized?" ”

Yang Shirt said: "No, it's a phase, when you have already memorized the rolling melon in front of the statue, Mu Lanqi will teach you new words, learn new ones, and then teach new ones, and repeat the cycle, just like that, after almost a year, something terrible happened, one day, when you woke up, you found that Xiao Fang and Xiao Ren had already gotten up to work in the field, they were actually working with their eyes closed, they went crazy!" Suddenly, one day, after you woke up from sleep, Xiao Fang and Xiao Ren died! ”

Speaking of this, Mu Zifei was startled, she said: "Brother, don't say it, I sound weird and terrible, you still don't use your words, let me listen to it is too fascinating." ”

Yang Shirt said: "I think, I still don't tell stories." ”

Mu Zifei asked, "Why?" ”

Yang Shan said: "Look at the ground, the stone corpse of the female emperor is gone. ”

Mu Zifei: "Huh? With a sound, she looked left and right and said, "Brother, yes, it's gone!" Moreover, the little children who have been next to us all this time are gone! Brother, where did the female emperor's corpse stone and the child go? ”

Yang Shan helped Mu Zifei up, he recalled, guessed and said: "It should be the child who regards you as his mother, when Mu Lanzhen put a dagger on your neck just now, the child was already very anxious, at this moment, if he recovers a little, he should be looking for Mu Lanqi to vent his anger!" ”

Mu Zifei said worriedly: "Brother, let's go find out!" You know, the child is covered in bruises, in such a short time, it is impossible to get completely well, he went to find grandma, and grandma is very scheming, the child may not be able to deal with her, we must find the child, stop him! ”

Mu Zifei's inner worry lies with her grandmother and children at the same time, and she doesn't want to see anyone hurt.

Yang Yi took Mu Zifei's hand and walked forward, in the direction of darkness, and they stepped into a place where the fire could not shine.

Mu Zifei took two steps faster, and before leaving Yang Shan, Mu Zifei said: "Brother, I'll show you the way, when the female emperor's corpse chased you, my grandmother and I had already groped in this darkness, and now we don't have a light searchlight in our hands, no different from a blind man passing by, fortunately, I paid attention to the road conditions, brother, you must follow my back." ”

In this way, the road in the dark is definitely not easy to walk, Yang Shan asked: "Feifei, you said that you must follow behind you, is there a single-plank bridge here?" If you are careless, you will fall? ”

Mu Zifei said: "It's not a single-plank bridge, but it's not much different from a single-plank bridge, the distance here is a little mysterious, not a flat and boundless, but like a girder in mid-air, we have to go on these girders, walk cautiously, go badly, it will really fall, but, fortunately, it's better than a single-plank bridge, the single-plank bridge must grasp the balance, the road under our feet, the width can be one meter." ”

Yang Shanxin said: "No way, when I come here, I can only listen to Fei Fei's words, I have no experience, and I have forgotten everything." ”

"Fei Fei," Yang asked the shirt, "and have you seen clearly what is below if you want to fall off the road?" ”

Mu Zifei said: "It's all piercing bones below, the same as the deep ditch we crossed under the broken bridge." I guess it's really going down, and it's definitely hanging by a thread. ”

Walking and walking, Mu Zifei stopped, Yang Shan stepped forward and bumped into her back, because it was too dark, she didn't pay attention for a while, Yang Shan asked, "Why did you stop?" ”

Mu Zifei said: "The road ahead is particularly strange, there will be a voice. ”

As he spoke, a phrase came from the front: "Tell jokes, tell jokes!" ”

Yang was stunned and said, "What's the situation?" ”

Mu Zifei said: "When my grandmother and I walked here, there was also this kind of voice, grandma ignored it and wanted to continue walking, but there was no road under her feet, so she told a joke, the voice laughed, and the road appeared, but grandma could only walk alone, there was still no road under my feet, and then grandma told a joke, and the road appeared, brother, I don't know how to tell jokes, you tell jokes, tell two, including me, and there will be a road under my feet." ”

When Yang Shan heard that there was such a thing, he couldn't help laughing, the kind of hilarious, he said, "Fei Fei, is it so funny?" Ha ha...... And tell jokes, wow, telling jokes is so childish, that voice, you listen to it! One day, there was an animal complaint meeting in the forest, and many animals came, and the first to complain was the donkey, and the donkey said that he hated humans the most, because people were stupid, but he had to say, stupid donkey! The pig also said at this time: That's it! People are fat, but they say fat pigs. The cow then said: "There are people who say big things, but they are called bragging! The cat shouted and said, "People are tricky, but they say that they are tired." The chicken was very dissatisfied and said: The person is small, but he said that it was a little J chicken. The dog was even more angry and said: The man made the woman's belly bigger, but he insisted that it was the dog! ”

After speaking, Yang Shi laughed wildly, but he laughed alone, and Mu Zifei didn't react at all.

Yang Shi stopped laughing and said, "Isn't it funny, Fei Fei?" ”

Mu Zifei said embarrassedly: "Brother, it's a little funny." ”

Yang Shan asked: "Then does that voice think it's funny, is there a road under your feet?" ”

Mu Zifei said: "Under your feet, it's still empty. ”

Yang Shan said seriously: "It seems that I am going to take out the killer joke that Uncle Gu once told!" Feifei, that voice, you listen well! This story happened in the Three Kingdoms, Liu Bei, Guan Yu, Zhang Fei, once won the battle, temporarily Shu was peaceful, the three of them went to Africa for a trip, but they didn't want to, they were caught by a primitive tribe there, the tribal chief said, we don't just kill outsiders, if the three of you, each find a kind of fruit here, ten each, and come back, who can pass my test, then I will let whom! So, the three of them were disrupted and went to different places to look for fruit! Soon, Zhang Fei came back first, guess what he found? I'm telling you, it's Apple! He found ten apples back, Zhang Fei asked, chief, I found the fruit, what kind of test are you going to do? The chief said that the way to test is to shove the fruit you find into your throat! Someone! Hold Zhang Fei down for me and stuff the apple into his mouth! If he doesn't die, let him go! Zhang Fei screamed, and as a result, two apples were stuffed, and Zhang Fei hung up! At this time, Guan Yu came back, and the thing he found back was ten small dates, the same way, the chief ordered someone to hold Guan Yu down, and stuffed ten small dates into Guan Yu's throat, Guan Yu held his breath, one, two, three, Guan Yu endured the pain, but just when the primitive man stuffed the last date behind him, Guan Yu suddenly laughed, it was really a wild laugh, and the last date exploded at once, the chief was furious, raised a knife and prepared to cut Guan Yu's neck, but Guan Yu still laughed, the chief asked, Guan Yu, you are dying, You're still smiling, what's so funny! Guan Yu sweated on his face, smiled and pointed ahead, he said, look, my eldest brother, he came back with ten durians! Wowha......"

After saying that, the voice in the dark laughed, not only that, but also laughed endlessly, laughing and laughing, vomiting! There was no sound.

Mu Zifei was stunned, she didn't know what was going on, but there was a road under her feet, Mu Zifei asked, "Brother, you go forward to explore the road and see if there is a way?" ”

Yang Shirt explored the way, and the road appeared under his feet, Yang Shirt said: "Feifei, didn't you say that you want to tell two stories that make that voice laugh, how to tell one that makes him laugh, and the road appears?" Isn't that the voice, laughing to death? Didn't he vomit just now? ”

Mu Zifei shook her head and said, "This is really not good, brother, you follow me and continue to walk!" ”

Yang Shan followed Mu Zifei, and after walking for a distance, Yang Shan turned his head, and the sea of peach forest and fire in the distance behind him was still so eye-catching, but the brighter it was there, the darker it seemed here.

Mu Zifei said worriedly: "Brother, my whole heart is hanging now, I want to look for the child and grandma according to this situation, will I find it, no one can help anyone, if the corpse of the female emperor turns back into a ghost, as agile as a night owl in the dark, we may be killed by the corpse of the female emperor at any time!" Brother, I don't know what to choose, I can remember how to walk these roads, but I forget how I got around them. ”

Yang Shan understood Mu Zifei's hesitation, he said: "Feifei, you can't grasp it well, I don't even see the general appearance of these roads, let alone where to go, neither of them is determined, then it is better to resign ourselves to fate, since we don't know, let's gamble and see if God will show us the way." ”

"Brother, how do you bet on God?" Mu Zifei asked.

Yang Shirt said: "Up and down the north and down the south, the left west, the right east, the left west, the right east, the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, the yang rises and the yin returns, so, the east is the yang, the west is the yin, the west is the yin, the right is the yang, I am a man, representing the right yang, you are a woman, representing the left yin, the two of us play rock-paper-scissors, whoever wins, will go to the side to which he belongs." ”

Mu Zifei frowned and said, "Brother, but when we stretch out our hand, no one can see anyone." ”

Yang Yi smiled and said, "After we stretched out, our hands slowly approached, and we could sense each other's gestures." ”

"Okay," Mu Zifei snuggled at Yang Yi, "Then you shout one, two, three, count to three, and we'll shoot together." ”

Yang Shan then counted one, two, three, the two of them touched each other, both of them were fists, and again, Yang Shan stretched out his scissors and lost to Mu Zifei's fist. Yang Shirt said: "You won Fei Fei, the woman is the left yin, let's go to the left." ”

Mu Zifei could only do this, pulling Yang shirt and walking carefully on the ground.

After walking for a while, Mu Zifei felt that the ground was on the ground extending from side to side for a meter, she was overjoyed and said, "Brother, we seem to have walked past the place where there is a deep ditch." ”

Yang Yi was also happy, his nervous heart all the way could be relaxed a little, and he used his feet to reach left and right, all of which were real bluestone ground.

"Da!" Not far ahead, there was a scream.

Mu Zifei's heart jumped, her hand holding Yang Shan suddenly tightened, Yang Shan also raised her heart to her throat, both of them heard it, it was a child screaming, he had a difference in language, the scream was not a sound, but that kind of unbearable tone, Yang Shan and Mu Zifei would not think that they heard it wrong.

Yang Shirt said: "It's a child's voice, he must be in danger, Fei Fei, are you still familiar with the road here?" ”

Mu Zifei said: "After I arrived here, I didn't go any further, and I didn't see the corpse of the female emperor coming, so we started to go back, and grandma still wanted to go back to find immortality." ”

Yang Yi then walked in front of Mu Zifei, he pulled Mu Zifei up and said, "Okay, Feifei, I'll lead the way, follow me, if there is any new situation, let me block it for you first!" The way here, I think, I should know how to go. ”

Mu Zifei was stunned for a moment and said, "Brother, you know? How do you know? Could it be your brain system? ”

Yang Shirt can be said to be out of the way, after all, this is darkness, whether it is the same as before, it is still a gamble! Yang Shirt was desperate, and his pace began to hurry.