I wanted to save a lot of people, but who did I save in the end?

I want to be a hero, but I can't even talk about a "dark hero". A person's efforts are not always rewarded, but even if the reason accepts such an idea, once it is magnified into the misery of more people, one thinks, "Why is there no reward?" ”

It's all helpless. Human beings have always had limits, so human beings have the luxury of hoping for the existence of "gods" and "heroes". If there really is such a hero who is "capable of saving everyone", then I think it doesn't matter if it's not me, as long as there is such a hero who saves the whole world, and accomplishes such a fact.

But no, there is no such person. There is no such thing as a good thing.

Everyone is dead, and those who are not dead are dying.

The person in front of me is either crazy or desperate, destroyed by extreme emotions, losing his mind, becoming like a machine, or hysterical.

The only child who seems to be mentally normal is also starting to deteriorate from the outside, and it will eventually end with the alienation of the mind.

If you have to choose one or the other.

If you make a choice, you can save one of them.

If only I could be a hero to some.

Perhaps, I, Gao Chuan, can at least save one person, and use my own will to save the one I choose. As in the past, he failed to save the number of people he hoped to save, but in the end, it was not completely nothing.

It is not about giving up the few for the sake of the majority, but about saving those who we think are most likely to be saved and who we must save. This decision can be said to be full of selfishness, and it is completely arbitrary, and I cannot guarantee the correctness of this judgment.

If I'm wrong. No one will stand up and accuse, and all the consequences will be borne by me alone. I felt my sin, and it was so heavy.

I could barely breathe.

However, isn't the hero the one who wants to stand up at this time? Although others do not want to be the side of the choice, they want to be the one who has the right to choose, but. Being chosen is not necessarily a bad thing, and being the one who makes the choice is not necessarily happy.

If I'm not a hero, I want a real hero to stand up, and he has to make the right choice, and he has to lead everyone to the best possible outcome -- what a real idea of shirking responsibility and pressure.

However, the truth is cruel.

Before my eyes, no one else could stand up at such a time. The only one standing here who has to make a choice. It's me, it's just me, it's only Takakawa!

The options are here: a child or a group of adults, a child who is beginning to alienate or a group of patients who are crazy and desperate.

I held the girl tightly in my arms, and her body began to emit a foul smell, and her skin became disgusting to the touch, sticky, as if I was no longer holding someone. It's something indescribable. Still, I couldn't let go. Even. I felt that holding her was the only comfort I could give myself.

“…… Hiss...... Elder brother...... Elder brother...... "She called me that......

"I choose her." Tears welled up in my eyes as I said this. I can't describe how I felt, but it wasn't despair or redemption, much less hope. The surging emotions made the tears unstoppable no matter what. In the blur of tears, I could vaguely see that my tears were falling on the girl's skin, and the mutated skin seemed to be gradually returning to normal. I can't be sure. What you see is not an illusion.

"Child" is meaningful, not only for this deepest night, but also for this sacrificial ritual, but also for me.

"Accept the command, confirm the will. The sacrificer is the fourth-level demon pattern messenger Gao Chuan. The humanoid was like a reading program, followed by a series of incomprehensible pronunciations, presumably a language because of the ups and downs of rhythm and pitch, before her voice returned to normal, stood up, and walked to the pulpit of the chapel. As she got up, all the people sitting on the benches hung their heads, even those who had just entered the chapel looked reverent.

At the same time, the music played by the organ was grand and sacred, enough to cover up the catastrophe that was taking place outside the chapel, making it seem that the inside and outside of the chapel were like two worlds.

Where did this music come from? I've confirmed that this chapel doesn't have these instruments, and there are no extra manpower.

All this is mysterious.

The humanoids interact with people as if they had done it countless times a long time ago. It was only at this time that the humanoid system showed the natural identity of the nun-like puppet who had been staying in the chapel. It's as if I was just a fake priest, and although she never showed it, she was the real presiding officer of the chapel.

She ascended to the high platform and faced the prayers of all the believers, and as soon as she raised her hand, everyone's eyes were raised. And the girl and I seem to have been forgotten in the corners of the world.

She spoke in a language I didn't understand, but her calm voice was filled with a strange power, and the others seemed to come back to their senses and cheered in the same language. When did they understand the language? I had no idea at all, but, perhaps, at this very moment, some kind of mystery manipulated them. I felt a small hand tugging at my clothes, and I looked down and saw that the girl's mouth had changed back to what it should be human, leaving only the black hole-like eyes, which were still annoying and terrifying. I tried my best to suppress the outpouring of fear and disgust, knowing that it was not the child's fault.

"Don't worry." I said to her.

She buried her head in my arms. Once again, I realized more clearly how prescient the young woman was in all that she had said, and how much she seemed to know but could not change her fate. But in the end, she chose her own way of dying, and perhaps for her, this was the last and most meaningful struggle. Coming to this chapel was a temporary salvation, but it was also the beginning of an even more terrifying one. The choice I made. And what is happening right now proves the validity of this view.

I delayed the death of these people, but it did not change the outcome of these people's sacrifices.

No, perhaps even the "delay" was not completed, and the sacrificial ceremony went ahead as scheduled.

If I had to get one result, it would be the girl in my arms. I hugged her tightly. Now, she's the only proof that I'm "not doing nothing". I couldn't help but imagine that if I left this gathering place alone, even this girl would not survive, and I would feel as if I could find comfort.

However, there is really no one, and there is no other way. Can we achieve better results than we do now?

Is it so heavy not to be a hero, not sure if you can be a hero, but moving towards your dream of being a hero? Am I doing something I can't afford? I didn't want to think so, but in my heart, I kept questioning.

All I can give myself the answer. There is only: who else but me can do it? Who's going to do it? At first, it was to move towards the heroic dream. But at this point, it is no longer possible to retreat, not because of subjective will, but in every sense, it is driven by a complex and terrible mechanism.

Heroes are not something that anyone can be if they want to, nor do they want to be inappropriate. It is not inappropriate, this is not a sweet dream diverted by personal will, but a cruel fact that is happening in a cruel world.

At least, in this gathering place. There is such a woman who chose death in her own way, and there is also such a child who can survive. And in other places, in other situations, there is probably no such good thing, only more desperate and crazy, right?

I'm in pain, I don't know if the other Takakawa, the prosthetic Takakawa who is in London, has also suffered such a cruel choice. No, he must have experienced it. Because, looking at Gao Chuan's experience, there are not a few similar situations, but at this moment, this choice is like detonating all the grievances, unwillingness, disappointment and other negative emotions accumulated in the past, which makes me so shaken.

I don't know what else to say or do at this point. Because, I've done everything I could, racking my brains, doing everything I could. My plans were not disturbed, except that I failed to save most of the people in this gathering place, but sacrificed most of them for the sake of a girl. It's just that I'm doing something I don't want to do. Isn't there less of this?

But what an abomination! I couldn't hold back my tears.

The humanoid was shouting something from the pulpit of the chapel, and the people below responded feverishly, and when the last voice of the humanoid fell, the people who should be with her began to swell, and they suddenly came to their senses, horrified to discover their own mutations, however, they soon realized that they had no control at all. They screamed, becoming brainless and crazy, their gaze falling on the humanoid and quickly turning to me and the girl.

It is normal that there are only three of us on the scene, and it is also special relative to them. This kind of normality and particularity is like stinging their hearts and making them even more crazy.

"Death is not the end, death is not withering, and in the unknown and deep mysteries, even death itself will disappear." So says the humanoid. Then she turned to me and said in a tone as if to pronouncing a sentence: "Well done, honorable hunter, your pain and sorrow have been conveyed. ”

"To whom?" I looked at her, in fact, I was not very hostile to the humanoid system, even if she gave such a cruel choice, but the situation behind it made it impossible for me to blame her. Can I say that the decision to tie the colors was wrong? Or is it the right thing to think about? My plan is even based on theirs, and if there is no sacrificial ritual, I will probably face a situation that will only be more difficult.

Yes, I am actually also a beneficiary of the sacrificial ritual, and I have no position to accuse, nor can I be sure of my own emotions and reason, it must be right.

I never blame anyone, I just feel sad and miserable for myself, that's all.

I had to pull myself together, and the thought made me have to straighten my back.

The humanoid narrative is strange, but her own existence is already strange and carries many mysteries. It seems that the humanoid system is not intended to explain either. I'm not surprised, if she wants to explain, I will also think about what kind of secrets are hidden in her explanation. In this way, it is really endless.

"You're calm." The humanoid system said.

"Yes, I'm calm, because what I did wasn't what I wanted to do, but what I had to do, something I had to do, something I had no choice but to do." My gushing emotions seemed to flow clean from my heart along with those tears.

“…… Dear hunter, this is part of the ceremony. The humanoid was silent for a long time, and then suddenly said this.

"Am I necessary and critical?" I continued to ask.

"Yes, honorable hunter, you have always been necessary and crucial." The humanoid system said.

"Is there really someone who calculates everything to this extent?" I asked rhetorically.

"Not people." The humanoid system said: "All this is fate. With that, her expression began to fluctuate, and then her body also began to fluctuate, like the reflection of a stone smashed into the water, and her voice changed slightly, "Ah Chuan, have you experienced it?" That's the power of the script. ”

"I'm like a character in a script, doing inevitable actions?" I don't know why, I smiled, but I didn't have any thoughts of laughing in my heart.

"No one can leave the script, but the script can also be tampered with." It was as if the humanoid had become another person, looked me squarely at me, and said, "So, can you give up?" You shouldn't show up, you're dead, Achuan, you're just a phantom. You're out of the script, why are you coming back? ”

I understand that the person in front of me is not the human form that I have always had. The person who spoke to me was the color himself, the subject behind the humanoid system.

"Color?" I say.

“…… Well. She seemed hesitant, but she answered.

"Maybe it's like you said, I'm just a phantom of the past, resurrected after death or something, in fact, I never thought about it." I finally understood why I was smiling, because it was not anger and fear, but merely the relief of seeing my family again, and after all this suffering, I finally saw Tie Se again, and communicated in a more direct way - just in this way, I felt that my pain and sorrow had been compensated. (To be continued......)