I happily agreed, and finally I asked, "How many letters did you withhold from Jiang He?"

My mother hesitated and said: "I can't remember the exact number, that little girl is crazy, there are always twenty or thirty letters, and then your father called Jiang Feng, I don't know how to say it, so I didn't write again." ”

A sadness overflowed in my heart, watching the flowing clouds in the wind outside the window fly in the night sky, imagining the same night, Jiang He's weak body was lying under the lamp to write a letter, and I hung up the phone.

It took me two hours to sort out the so-called guest room and get it clean. This room was my bedroom when I was in high school, and when my grandmother passed away in college, I moved to my grandmother's old room after graduation because it was bigger and had better lighting and ventilation. THE ROOM HAD BEEN EMPTY FOR YEARS, MY FATHER FORBADE MY MOTHER TO CLUTTER, AND MY HIGH SCHOOL MOTTO, "YESTERDAY YOU SAID TOMORROW!" WAS PRESSED UNDER THE GLASS OF MY DESK. It seems to be an advertising slogan from Nike back then.

At half past eleven in the evening, I took my medicine on time. I need to take medicine on time and go to bed on time, and sleep directly determines the quality of my condition. Dr. Meng and I have repeatedly emphasized that sleep is the determination of the condition, not the influence of the condition.

I have to take two kinds of medicines, Dr. Meng said that it is sulpride and aptolin, one antidepressant and one anti-anxiety, one in the morning and one in the evening, and I can't take it the other way around. After eating for a long time, I also understand that the so-called anti-anxiety is to make you fall asleep, and anti-depression is to make you feel uplifted and make you unable to sleep. I spend every day in these two pills.

Half an hour after the medicine I went to bed. The strength of the medicine was almost up, and I fell asleep in a daze. Before falling asleep, I thought, if Jiang He is my sister, it would be good, I can watch her from young to old, and then give her a funeral.

Or she gave me a funeral.

Dreams are my homework every night. After the strength of the medicine, the dream came.

I circled around the bench in the hospital hallway to read.

There were scattered footsteps behind me, and I wanted to turn back but didn't bother to move, I knew she would walk behind me, like every night before.

She was close behind me, her breath spraying into my neck, and I could even feel the heat. I smelled a musk-like smell.

She leaned into my ear and said very softly, "What are you doing?" ”

I woke up at six o'clock in my phone alarm, an hour earlier than usual. After my father passed away, I set the alarm to the theme song "See You Again" for the latest movie "Fast and Furious", but I didn't expect that yesterday I would be on another life path with a song. When I brush my teeth and wash my face, I see myself again in the mirror, and my face is still lifeless. Thinking that I would meet Jiang He later, I squeezed out a smile at myself in the mirror.

I said goodnight to Jiang He before going to bed last night, but I didn't tell her about the letter, since it wasn't a problem that had to be solved that night, so don't say it in the middle of the night to disturb people's rest. It's been more than ten years, and now it seems that everything is a trivial matter, and it's not bad to have anything to explain.

Originally, I wanted to make some cereal for breakfast, but I thought that it would be better to ask Jiang He to come over early and go out to eat together, and chat by the way, so I made a phone call, and Jiang He happily agreed.

I waited downstairs for a long time, the taxi arrived, Jiang He's luggage was very simple, a big suitcase, plus a violin case, like an aspiring young man who volunteered to teach.

She dresses seemingly casually, but if you look closely, you can taste the elaborate style and style. The collar of the white shirt has a pattern of hollow embroidered almond walnuts, and the hem of the blue skirt has a faint Uighur-style pointed arch pattern, which is delicate and bright, but it seems to me that there is another special charm. Such clothes cannot be bought ready-to-wear, they must be custom-made, and the price of the material is expensive.

Almond walnut has a special meaning in Central Asian cultures, resembling an embryo after deformation, representing life; That arch pattern was generally used on the graves of Uyghur nobles to signify death. Jiang He's mother has a deep artistic cultivation, and when we were young, she often instilled something in the two of us. That's what she told us. Uyghur women don't wear clothes with this pattern, and Jiang He has always been a maverick, so it's not surprising that he can customize them to his liking.

Jiang He said to me, "You look more energetic today. Her smile was like the morning sun with the smell of grass, and her bright eyes shook my heart.

I put my luggage home first, and then walked for ten minutes and I took her to that Hangzhou snack bar. She wondered why I had walked so far for breakfast, and I echoed Wilde's remark that only the bored would play tricks at breakfast. Then tell her that this is the most authentic fritters you can eat in Xiamen. Jiang He quipped: "You seem to be on the same page as Hangzhou." I replied seriously: "For many years, I felt that as long as I had a relationship with Hangzhou, I would not have lost contact with you completely." ”

Jiang He said: "Affectionate. ”

I always feel that Jiang He seems to have something on his mind between talking and laughing, maybe Shi Ting is right, she really has something to find me, but that's also a good thing for me, at least she still needs me, maybe I should find an opportunity to take the initiative to mention it and reflect a little man's responsibility.

When I was a child, we had a habit of gossiping, and as soon as we met, we would exchange what we had seen and heard all day, and I remember even telling her that in the middle of the night she heard a terrible panting sound coming from her parents' room, like two dogs fighting for food, and I went up and knocked on the door to drive them away. Now that I think about my parents who were panicked at the time, I still think it's quite enjoyable. So naturally, I put together what my mom said to me yesterday. After so many years, it seems that the power of habit is really infinite, as the old saying goes, kindergarten is almost natural, and habit is natural. Of course, it could also be that my mental development stopped early.

Breakfast was served quickly, and the fritters were oily and crunchy and looked delicious. I'm not heat-tolerant, I'm not used to eating particularly hot food, Jiang He is too, she used chopsticks to pluck the fritters, looked at me and said, "Brother, didn't you ask where those letters went?" ”

"Don't call me brother, you just came back from Japan, so calling me that reminds me of it. I didn't ask about the letter, I didn't know if my father burned it or something, anyway, my family is so big, I'll look for it slowly. ”

"Brother, you don't suspect that you are really my brother?"

"Big sister, my mother's wild guesses can't stand up to scrutiny, can't you trust my father, can't you still trust your mother? As for why the adults turned their faces at parting, I don't think we have the ability to guess out of thin air, I want to know the truth My dad can't ask, you can ask your dad. But seriously, I'm not that curious, and now that we're in touch again, I don't care why they're arguing now, I can't fight anymore anyway. ”

Jiang He sighed and said, "You analyzed with your mother last night very reasonably, Lou's mother is not too suspicious of life after watching too many TV series." In fact, there is one thing that I only learned until I grew up, I was IVF, and your mother doesn't seem to know this, otherwise she wouldn't have guessed that aspect. There are other reasons for the fathers' conflict. ”

I was a little surprised, and looked at Jiang He: "Sister, I didn't expect you to be a high-tech product."

Jiang He ignored me, took a sip of soy milk but was burned, gave me a blank look and said, "So I want to be my brother in the next life." ”

We already had IVF at that time? I thought it was only in the last few years, why do you do test tubes? Although I felt that it was inappropriate, I couldn't help but ask.

"That's because the grasslands are in the breeding season, and you're at an age where you're concerned about reproduction. As for why my family does test tubes, when there will be time, I will say slowly, eat your meal first. After a while, Jiang He seemed a little unwilling, she pointed to the words on the menu with chopsticks and said: "Look at this Song style, there is a saying that this is Qin Hui's word, and it was called Qin Ti from the beginning, so what?" Yue Fei was executed by his hands on trumped-up charges, and the common people cursed him for thousands of years with fried fritters. In fact, the falsification of China's official history abounds, the Mongols of the Yuan Dynasty repaired the history of the Song Dynasty, and the Manchurians of the Qing Dynasty repaired the history of the Ming Dynasty, just like we revise the history of the Qing Dynasty today, how do you say it will be written? We can't even tell what happened after the founding of the People's Republic of China, anyway, people have been dead for years, and you can count the bad debts as you want. Now that Daddy Lou died a few days ago, he began to look for a hat to buckle his head? We can't do this to Daddy Lou. Jiang He quietly damaged my mother.

"My history was enlightened by my grandmother, and my values are very positive." I'm hippie smiling.

Although it is a bit nondescript to tie my dad with the thousand-year-old fritter Qin Hui, I agree with Jiang He on this point, and I have been annoyed that my mother has been beating my father on the issue of men and women for so many years, and he really didn't let it go until he died.

I divided the fritters into sections with chopsticks and said: "But this fritters are not fried Qin juniper, Liu Yuxi of the Tang Dynasty wrote a poem to praise the fritters, which was called fried stew at that time, and later generations because of the homophony to spread the falsehood, you can eat it with confidence." ”

Jiang He picked up a piece and looked at me and said, "It doesn't matter if you believe these false things or not, but there are some things that you still have to believe in." Our human civilization is built on a deep belief in something. Doubt is not the ability, ask questions and then find the right answer is the ability. ”

I looked into her bright eyes, and a strange feeling spread through my mind, as if she had something to say. I looked around, there were a lot of people eating breakfast, all of them were eating silently with their heads down, I turned my head and asked her, "What do you mean?" I don't understand much. ”

"For example......" Jiang He groaned while eating fried dough sticks and looked around, this ordinary small shop was simply furnished and had no features, and she didn't know what she was looking for. Jiang He's gaze turned around, and finally landed on the menu he had just pointed to.

The menu is very ordinary, it is the kind of plastic sign that many restaurants will stand, and there is often an advertisement for any brand of wine or drink, and the price list can be sandwiched in the middle. This kind of brand is generally given by the manufacturer, and this one is no exception, with an advertisement for Pepsi Cola Golden Monkey to celebrate the New Year, which should be last year, and the six-year-old boy made Sun Wukong's signature action, holding a can of blue Coke in his hand.

I stared at her with wide eyes: "You won't tell me the secret of Sun Wukong's life experience, I already know that his mother is Nuwa, his father is Taishang Laojun, and he is an illegitimate child." ”

Jiang He laughed: "What nonsense are you talking about." Actually, I want to ask you, have you ever heard of the Fallen People? The fall of the fallen. ”

I shook my head: "What kind of person is this, the fallen man?" Does this count as me? ”