Xu has drunk too much wine recently, and Lin Yan's head hurts again.

The early spring night was still cool, and the flowers were noisy in the wind in the moonlight, as if to wake up the intoxicated hostess.

Lin Yan's personal maid Bagui inquired about the news outside, and quietly walked into the courtyard at this moment.

She sighed secretly when she saw her master lying drunk on the stone bench and a few jars of wine swaying on the table.

The second master has repeatedly ordered that his subordinates not let the master take the wine to drink, but the master always has a way to secretly find a few jars.

She went into the house and took out a thick cloak and put it on Lin Yan's body.

Lin Yan felt the movement, opened her eyes and looked at it, and said with a smile: "Bagui, are you back?" ”

"Grandma, why is this a problem? No matter how much you jump away from Luan, you can't go beyond you. ”

Bagui comforted: "I went out to inquire just now, and the second master had already sent the Liluan to Zhuangzi, but Mrs. didn't say anything, but acquiesced." ”

A gust of wind blew, Lin Yan felt a little cold, tightened the cloak on her body, and did not speak.

Bagui thought that she was still sad, and said while cleaning up the wine jar on the stone table:

"It's not that the slave said that the second grandmother, you have been married in the past few years, and the days when the second master entered the room have been counted. No matter how much Madame loves you, she is also anxious to hold her grandson. Although this time let Na Liluan take advantage of the loophole, but didn't he take care of your mood first? ”

If you want her to say, just wait for Na Liluan to give birth to a child, and go to the mother to keep the child.

In this way, the second grandmother is no longer happy to let the second master enter the room, at least there is a child by her side.

Lin Yan still didn't speak, and reached out to serve the wine on the table, only to find that it had been cleaned up by Bagui.

She simply lay quietly on the stone bench and watched the spring colors in the garden by the moonlight.

This eight-return has followed her since she was a child.

It's been a few years, and the people around me have walked and married, but she is the only one who combs her hair and never leaves herself.

Lin Yan sighed, it's this Bagui who has been with her for half her life, and she still doesn't know the real her.

Where would she feel sorry for that Liluan, she didn't have a heart, how could she care about a slave who climbed the bed.

She gets drunk every day so that she can see her dead parents and her brother without a trace in her dreams.

She regretted how many years she hid in her uncle's house.

If my father hadn't been resentful when he was kicked out of the Xinguo Mansion and went to pick him up, wouldn't there have been the last yin and yang separation?

and my brother, who has been gone for a few years, as if there is no longer such a person.

She really wanted to find her brother and ask if she had really let go of everything in the Guogong Mansion and hid somewhere drunk and dreamed of death like her.

For two years, she changed her freewheeling wildness, and cultivated herself into an elegant housewife with a good demeanor and a full reading of poetry and books, and went to the social arena to fight with her cousin Lin Xian.

There are losses and wins, but it is sad to lose, and I am not very happy when I win.

What's the point? His father and mother turned into loess, and the Guogong Mansion is also someone else's.

No matter how brilliant she is, no matter how much she presses her, she can't change Lin Xian's status as the wife of Linjiang Houshizi, and she can't change the fact that she has become a side of the Guogong Mansion.

But it was Lin Xian, who was forced to be anxious, told the truth about her father being kicked out of the house back then, and looked at herself who was stunned, and it was a joke.

There is no point in fighting in the ring, knowing the truth but being powerless, Lin Yan has never liked to go out since then.

There has been no news from his stomach, and his aunt's face has sunk day by day.

The gentle cousin, the kind-hearted cousin, married her cousin in order for Lin Yan to have a place to shelter from the wind and rain, and she was torn between the contradictions between her aunt and her every day, and she was young and gloomy.

Lin Yan laughed twice, alarming the Bagui who was standing quietly on the side.

Bagui asked tentatively, "What is the second grandmother laughing at?" ”

Lin Yan glanced back at her, how many times she corrected it, but she didn't change it.

Second grandmother? What kind of second grandmother is she, out of this yard, who else knows that she and her cousin are just a nominal husband and wife?

"Say, 'Where is my brother now?' Is it still alive? Lin Yan suddenly mentioned Lin Xiuhe, who had disappeared for a long time.

Bagui was a little surprised, but still replied, "Xu yes...... Are you living a good life somewhere? ”

Even she didn't believe this: the young master is the grandson of Lao Xinguogong, and today's Guogong is just a firstborn son who has taken the title, but in the end he is a concubine.

This dynasty is different, the young master lives for a day, and the grandfather of the country sleeps unsteadily for a day.

At the beginning, for the sake of the title, the grandfather of the country was able to eradicate his own brother regardless of brotherly affection.

Now he is more powerful, and he has just taken over the capital guards. The life and death of the young master is really unknown.

But these eight returns can't be said, Lin Yan hasn't gone out for a long time, and the situation outside is not clear.

The second master repeatedly instructed that the recent turmoil in the court should not disturb the second grandmother with the unfinished things outside.

Bagui didn't have the guts, and he couldn't bear to watch Lin Yan, who dreamed back at midnight, tossing and turning with the relics of his wife and master, and stayed awake all night.

She is not stupid, she knows what Lin Yan has borrowed wine to kill her sorrows in the past few years.

But what if you know, since you chose to hide in the Lu'an Hou Mansion and not come out, what's the use of regretting? It can only make the enemy happy, and the relatives will suffer.

So Bagui persuaded again: "Late at night, grandma go back to the house." Take good care of your body, strive to have a child of your own in the future, and let the master's bloodline continue. ”

Lin Yan didn't seem to hear it, her chest was very tight, as if she was about to lose her breath.

Lin Yan knew that her body might not be able to do it, and in the past year, the more she drank the wine, the more fierce she became, but her brain became more and more sober.

She often thinks: if she had ...... If she hadn't resented her father because of her mother's early death, and she went to pick him up when her father was kicked out of the country's mansion, would there not have been her father's later death on the streets.

Thinking of Lin Xian's triumphant words, thinking of her father's death and being so badly trampled against his reputation, and his brother being forced to leave the country, Lin Yan's heart hurt.

The hatred that came from thought turned into regret over time.

Lin Yan stood up holding her chest, Bagui thought she was going back to the house, and hurriedly followed two steps.

Lin Yan staggered to the flowers and tore off the flowers vigorously.

The thin branches instantly cut through her soft hands, and blood flowed down the path of the flowers.

No matter how much blood flows, it is not as painful as the remorse in my heart.

If she returned to the beginning, she would never occupy the identity of the second grandmother in vain and delay her cousin's life.

She, Lin Yan, will definitely let go of her knots, protect her father, and find her brother.

That Xinguo Mansion, no matter what her grandfather thinks, in Lin Yan's heart, it should be a lineage, and if it was snatched away, she must snatch it back!

In my uncle's Liu'anhou Mansion, I really didn't have a good time. After a long time, I almost forget my true nature.

The wild and free Miss of the Guogong Mansion back then, even if her mother died early and she lived in her uncle, she still lived freely.

It's like now, like a turtle with a shrunken head, and you can't bite if you're forced into a corner.

No more, you can't live a life like this!

Lin Yan threw away the roses in her hand and looked back, her expression had the spirit of the bright eyebrows of the year, and the whole person was alive.

Bagui looked at the master with abnormal eyes at the moment uneasily, thinking of Lin Yan, who had been drinking more and more recently but couldn't sleep anymore, and remembering the words of the doctor who was specially invited a few days ago because he was worried about the master's body.

"Back to the light", the four words that suddenly came to his mind made Bagui at a loss, and he rushed to Lin Yan in a panic.

Lin Yan smiled at the corner of her mouth and fell headlong towards the sea of flowers behind her.