Chapter 78: Don't forget the original intention

Jessica's love came very violently.

The day before, she only had a good impression of Zeng Yingjian, and she didn't think of anything more than gratitude.

But the thrilling night became the best catalyst, and once the seeds of love sprouted in her heart, they quickly grew into towering trees, and she accepted him without hesitation.

This is the Western woman.

If it is a woman from Dahuaguo, there must be a time to be reserved and shy, a time to understand slowly, a time to gradually deepen and a time to hesitate, from heartbeat to the final determination of the relationship, it is a long process - of course, six yuan to eat Malatang kind of fast food, it definitely doesn't count!

Women in the West are completely different.

Because of cultural differences, they have almost no scruples about their pursuit of love, as long as they are sure of their hearts, they will not think about it so much at all, neither thinking about the future nor caring about the past.

As for going to bed and having a relationship, it's a natural thing, and it's not that important, let alone sacred.

Once a woman falls in love, she will think of marriage, but in the hearts of Western women, love and marriage are completely different things.

Therefore, falling in love with someone and having a relationship with him is a very simple thing for a Western woman, not so complicated, and there are not too many deep meanings.

Zeng Yingjian believes that as long as he is willing, Jessica will never refuse, and maybe there is something to look forward to! If he walked into her bedroom again and slept in the same bed with her, it would certainly be natural to have sex.

But in his heart, he couldn't accept it.

Maybe in the eyes of some boys (such as roommate Li Wei), sleeping with a beautiful woman is not white, anyway, it is not himself who suffers, and the others will be talked about in the future, because what they pursue is the pleasure of the flesh.

But Zeng Yingjian's idea is different, in his opinion, the physical relationship between men and women should be based on sincere emotional exchanges. What he pursues is not pure carnal desire, but "unity of spirit and flesh", once he has a relationship with Jessica, in his heart, it means a lot.

It means that he and she have been completely connected since then;

It means that she has become an inseparable part of him from now on;

Meaning, she became his woman.

This may be a bit machismo, but these are Zeng Yingjian's values.

If he never returns to the real world again, he will definitely not hesitate to have sex with her, because he loves her, is willing to be with her, and is willing to marry her.

But he always wants to go back!

How long can he stay in this world? Ten days? Twenty days? Thirty days at most. He's just a passerby.

Maybe Jessica doesn't care, she only cares about the present, and she doesn't have to think too much about the future.

But Zeng Yingjian has to think about returning to the real world.

In the real world, whether it is legal or moral, everyone believes in monogamy, and he doesn't have to think about it to know that Shi Lian will never want him to have a relationship with another woman.

In "Titanic", he thought that he couldn't go back, and he had already had two halfway derailments, so it can be said that "those who don't know are not guilty".

Now, knowing that it is not a dream, knowing that you can go back, and still having a relationship with Jessica, then it can't be said, that is, "knowingly committing a crime, the crime is added to the first degree".

Perhaps he could say to himself: these are two different worlds, and this body is not the one in the real world. Strictly speaking, no matter what he did in this world, his body in the real world, did not betray his girlfriend.

But what is the difference between this and those men who come around casually when they travel abroad or go on a business trip?

A person is in a strange place, the journey is lonely, the heart is empty, and the body is restless, so he takes advantage of the opportunity of his girlfriend's absence to have a dewy relationship with another woman. Everyone takes what they need, doesn't ask about the past, doesn't think about the future, and becomes a passerby after separation. When the relationship occurred, safety measures were also taken, and there were no sequelae.

After he returned to China, this dewy affair disappeared of course, as if nothing had happened. He went back to his old life, and if he didn't say it, his girlfriend couldn't know, and it didn't seem to affect his relationship with his girlfriend.

What an exciting, beautiful, and fascinating encounter! - Many people, whether boyfriends, have fantasized about it like this!

However, he can deceive his girlfriend and everyone, but he can't deceive himself!

The so-called "can't deceive yourself" means that he can't turn a corner in his heart for a while.

People are not animals, even if Zeng Yingjian is at the age of "Mu Shaoai", when he sees a beautiful woman, he will have a body impulse, and then he will have a heart of admiration, but it is still the upper body that dominates the body, not the lower body.

Of course, he also yearns for the thing of "capturing the heart of a beautiful woman and possessing the body of a beautiful woman", but the three views formed for a long time have been ringing alarm bells and constantly reminding him that he is making mistakes, which makes him hesitate and hesitate.

This fierce conflict of emotions and thoughts has been tormenting him since the moment the ability fell from the sky. People's hearts are changeable, that is the result of subtle changes, and it is not so easy to change, or how to say that "the country is easy to change, but the nature is difficult to change"?

He is an honest man with single-minded feelings, how can he become a big carrot overnight?

That's not scientific.

In fact, he is also self-deceptive.

My heart is moved, and I have kissed passionately, isn't it cheating? Whether you have sex or not, in fact, there is not much difference.

On the road of betraying his girlfriend, he has already walked several steps, and it seems too late to turn back.

It's just that for him, on the way to the abyss, grabbing a small piece of grass also has to struggle.

In fact, he also knew deep down in his heart that after having the skill of "crossing over", in the face of temptations from various worlds, the morality and laws of the real world could not restrain him, and he would cheat one day, but sooner or later.

The two thoughts of "being a dedicated and good man" and "letting go of your desires" went back and forth in his heart, and all he thought about was "being able to drag on for a day".

Compared with "cheating", in fact, what he is more entangled with is that he goes back, what should Jessica do?

Maybe once Zeng Yingjian returns, this world will disappear again, and everything will become a thing of the past.

But it could also be that the world would go on and without him, Jessica would meet another man and get married and have children.

Whatever it is, isn't it all "chaos from the beginning to abandonment"? How could he accept it?

What he dreamed of, of course, was that after he went back, he could come back, which would be equivalent to having a "golden house to hide Jiaojiao" for Jessica.

But can this dream come true?

He didn't know, that's why he struggled.

Zeng Yingjian moved a chair and sat next to the sofa, his eyes seemed to be looking at "Zhang Ziyi", but his heart was surging.

Of course, he noticed the change in his mentality after the ability appeared.

He didn't dare to kill chickens before, but now he didn't even blink an eye to kill, and tonight he killed more than a dozen in one go.

He always thought that he was a single-minded man who would "start from the beginning" to his girlfriend, but he didn't expect that as soon as he crossed, he would be moved by other women, and now he has begun to fantasize about the good thing of "having both fish and bear's paws".

Is it because of the true colors of men?

Or is he not strong-willed?

What will he become in the future? Will it be like those villains in the movie who are out of control? Indiscriminate killing, lustful and obsessed with the mind...... He didn't dare to think about it.

He struggled to stick to certain bottom lines, but he felt powerless.

He tried to find something that would hold on, but what was it?

Be a good person?

But what makes a good person? I'm afraid that his current behavior is no longer a good person in the eyes of some people.

In all conscience?

He already felt ashamed of his girlfriend.

……

For a moment, Zeng Yingjian was a little dazed.

"Steve!"

Jessica's soft call pulled him back.

Looking back, Jessica was lying under the covers, looking at him with wide eyes.

"What?"

"Look at me! I want you to watch me fall asleep! ”

Jessica was a little jealous of her new boyfriend's staring at the injured woman instead of looking at her.

"Good!"

Zeng Yingjian smiled slightly, turned around, and looked at her.

A voice sounded in my heart:

"Why do you want to do so much? Protect the people I care about, they are happy, I am happy! This is my original intention, and it will never change! ”

On this day, Jessica has experienced worry, panic, surprise and sweetness, and the ups and downs of emotions have long exhausted her, but because of the excitement of her first love, she has been holding on.

In her boyfriend's tender gaze, she smiled and soon fell asleep sweetly.

Zeng Yingjian turned around and looked at "Zhang Ziyi" again.

When the fever subsided, her face turned a little pale, and she reached out and touched her forehead, which was cool, but she didn't wake up.

No, her eyelashes moved just now, if it weren't for Zeng Yingjian's good eyes, I'm afraid she wouldn't have noticed it yet!

She was awake, but she was pretending to be asleep.

Zeng Yingjian stood up, walked over and gently closed Jessica's bedroom door, returned to the chair and sat down, before speaking softly:

"I know you're awake! How? Do you want to sneak up on me again? ”

He speaks Mandarin.

"Zhang Ziyi" slowly opened his eyes and looked over, his eyes were full of surprise:

"Do you speak Mandarin?"

………………