Fei Gu often recalls that the street, the narrow gravel road, and the creek next to the gravel intersection, was the same scene when he was in elementary school. Pen & Fun & Pavilion www.biquge.info

It wasn't until he became a couple with He Mina that he still had the same dream.

He Mina may not know until she dies that she and Fei Gu once had a relationship in elementary school, and this incident has been remembered in Fei Gu's heart for a lifetime.

A girl who is not beautiful and slightly chubby can't attract the attention of most boys, but if this boy is a lonely and inferior child, and they meet under special circumstances, it is possible that they will have the first intention.

In Fei Gu's dreams, it is rare to see He Mina when she was a child, but as long as she dreams about it, it will be extremely clear.

Since the moment his adoptive parents took him out of the orphanage, Feigu thought for a while that he could finally face a new life, but what did a new life look like? Feigu never thought it through.

When he grew up, he used to drive back to look for that road, which had become a concrete road, but there were still no traffic lights, no difference between motorized and non-motorized lanes, and not even sidewalks.

The creek has been filled in, the concrete road is uneven, in some places uneven, the former school no longer exists, and in its place stands the high-rise buildings of the city hall.

In Fei Gu's memory, there are three things that are the most profound, the first two things are about the school, and the last thing is about the vicious lame uncle, how he got to the lame uncle, Fei Gu has long been unable to remember, what his biological parents are like and their names, as if they have been erased, they are completely unimpressed.

Maybe it's because when he was a child, Uncle Lame often abused him, maybe it's because of that illness, anyway, the earliest memories have disappeared and can't be recovered.

Of course Fei Gu cared, but he didn't want to bother to find it back, Fei Gu just wanted to be able to live a little better.

Feigu gets angry just by thinking of his lame uncle, the man's abuse almost killed him, he is a heavy drinker, he swears and beats people when he finishes drinking, and then sleeps. Feigu didn't even have a full meal when he was in his hands.

In the most difficult days, there was a boy who often brought some snacks to Feigu, and as long as he didn't show it to his lame uncle, he could occasionally get a piece of flatbread or half a bun or something from him. Although Fei Gu, who was sensitive and inferior, never gave him a good face, from the bottom of his heart, Fei Gu was grateful at that time.

Let's not talk about the lame uncle, let's talk about the little school that Feigu often sees in his dreams.

It has a large playground, as soon as you enter the school gate, you can see that the playground is oval, and the exercise equipment on both sides is very old.

The school communication room is on the left hand side of the school gate, and the aunt in the communication room is a chubby middle-aged woman, about forty or fifty years old, with very obvious wrinkles on her forehead and gray hair. She was always smiling, occasionally saying a few words to Fei Gu because of his dull personality, but most of the time she was kind.

Passing by the communication room, I immediately turned right, and at this end of the playground was a small classroom, which was the most broken classroom in the school, but it was still in use, and Fei Gu had also taken classes in it, and Fei Gu remembered that the first time he wore a red scarf was in this classroom.

The mottled blackboards, the worn tables and chairs, the scratches left by batches of students on the tables, the rusty iron window frames, and even the difficulty of closing the windows made it difficult to make an unpleasant creak.

In front of this classroom and communication room, there is a huge playground, and Heigu would like to walk around the playground slowly when he is alone, but he never fulfills this wish, because there are always many children playing football or playing in the playground.

Directly opposite the playground is an auditorium with large round wooden pillars, a bit like a temple hall, except that there are no bodhisattvas or altars. Several stout pillars stand in the center of the auditorium, and the auditorium door is also the old-fashioned carved wooden door with several openings, and there is a tall wooden door frame under the door, anyway, it is not like the new school auditorium, it may be the old building left over from the time of the school, and it was used as an auditorium.

But it's a big one, and the whole grade doesn't feel too crowded when students gather here. Behind the auditorium is the formal school building, where two old buildings stand and where students of all grades attend classes.

There was only one school on the street, and Fei Gu's home, less than a hundred meters from the school, was on the fifth floor of an old building, and his adoptive parents often told him that they could hear their school reading aloud from their windows.

The gate of this elementary school is also very strange, it is actually a round arch like the inside of the garden, directly facing the stone road, if you are not familiar with the passers-by here, you will definitely think of the school as a place like a garden.

When he was studying, Fei Gu's grades were not good, he was a little sluggish, and he was a little slack, not that stupid, but he had a feeling of slackness, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get rid of this feeling, so he couldn't bring back a satisfactory grade to his adoptive parents. These were a new inferiority complex for Feigu, but he never said it.

One of the scenes that often appear in Fei Gu's dreams is the scene of being stopped at the door of the classroom, and the other is very illusory, and the scenes are inverted, and the shadows of several streets will overlap and appear.

First of all, let's talk about being stopped by a bad boy at the door of the classroom that day, because in the hands of the lame uncle, Fei Gu has experienced too much suffering, so he was born malnourished, his body is very thin, and he is also very short.

In addition, his grades are not good, he is often in a daze at school, and few teachers like Feigu. Some of the tall male students began to bully Fei Gu occasionally. But it's really only occasional, because Feigu will also fight back.

Once, when Fei Gu was going to be late for school in the morning, he hurriedly stuffed the snacks his adoptive mother gave him into his mouth, and ran to the door of the classroom as fast as he could, but was stopped by a fat and tall boy, whose body was like an elephant to Fei Gu.

He blocked the classroom door tightly, the class bell was about to ring at this time, if he couldn't hand in his homework before the first class, Fei Gu would definitely be punished by the teacher for standing or being scolded, Fei Gu tried very hard to push away this obstacle, but there was no way to do it anyway. He was so anxious that tears were about to come out.

At this moment, the class bell rang, and the boy who stopped in front of Feigu immediately ran back to his seat, of course, he was also afraid of being scolded. When Fei Gu finally returned to his seat, the teacher had already entered the classroom, so, of course, the end was that Fei Gu neither finished the breakfast in his mouth, nor did he hand in the day's homework in time.

Although the teacher didn't let Fei Gu stand up, Fei Gu still hated the boy he couldn't beat no matter what.

Oh, by the way, Fei Gu was not called Fei Gu at that time, his name was Holly, a very poetic name, which was given to him by his adoptive parents. As for why it was changed to Feigu later, he himself didn't know. Maybe it's to hide the memory, or maybe it's to bury the memory.

Another thing that occasionally appears in dreams is his first meeting with Helina.

He Mina seemed to be a relative of Aunt Conveyor at that time, and she was not as chubby and very thin as she was later, but her small round face never changed.

Once, when Fei Gu walked alone from the playground to the communication room, he saw that the aunt in the communication room was nervously putting He Mina's head on the pool, desperately washing it with water. Feigu didn't know what it was about, so he took a closer look.

The aunt in the communication room rinsed He Mina's eyes, and there was a stainless steel lunch box that was commonly used at that time, that is, the kind of lunch box with the outer layer of stainless steel and the inner layer of thermal insulation, and a thin stainless steel handle on it.

Fei Gu knew that this kind of lunch box, if he scraped the inside layer hard when eating, would explode, and he once had one himself, which his adoptive mother bought for him, but he never used it.

The broken glass slag may have entered He Mina's eyes, anyway, from the side, He Mina cried very much.

"Auntie, it hurts! It hurts! He Mina screamed.

"Don't move, just for a while." Auntie's voice was also nervous.

Then, the aunt looked up and saw him, and began to open her mouth to talk to him, every time the dream came here, it always stopped abruptly, Fei Gu's memory after this incident was actually very clear, but it just didn't appear in the dream.

Forget it, Fei Gu always thinks, if you can't dream of it, you can't dream of it, what is there to think about this kind of thing, He Mina has long forgotten it, even if she remembers, she won't care.

Finally, it is the strange fork in the road that often appears in dreams, on the right side of the fork, is a slope that Fei Gu is more familiar with, the slope goes down, the road gradually becomes wide, this may be the road that the adoptive parents must pass through to work, so I will remember it so clearly, the widened road flow is also more, bustling, but everyone's face Fei Gu can't see clearly, even the adoptive parents who are talking while pushing the bicycle, their faces seem to have been erased off in the dream.

On the left is a road that is both familiar and unfamiliar, with a short turn, and then a large muddy road, really muddy road, much like the road of a construction site.

Fei Gu actually couldn't remember where it was, when he was a child, he wouldn't go to school every day and he wouldn't pass such a road, the middle of the dirt road was all dug up, and it was dug very deep, as if it was digging a river, and the road left for people to walk on both sides was very narrow, and every time I dreamed of this, there would be a bunch of children lined up on the very narrow sidewalk, and they would walk slowly from there, and each child's shoes were covered with mud, and even some children would be seen crying because they slipped and fell.

Every time he saw a child slipping in a dream, Feigu's heart would twitch uncontrollably, as if the child who slipped and fell in the next second would fall into a deep ditch and disappear.

After waking up from the dream, Fei Gu occasionally wondered, is this a kind of kindness? A kindness that unconsciously comes from the bottom of the heart.

Putting that aside, in reality Feigu felt that he was greedy and unsympathetic, and he really thought so, especially when his adoptive father told him the secret before he died, and he always wanted to get that money, even to the point of being obsessed. But how can you get close to that house on your own?

Later, after dating He Mina, Fei Gu wanted to tell He Mina his secrets many times.

But at the same time, he was very afraid, what if this girl became greedy and got rid of herself after getting the money? Although He Mina took the initiative to confess to him, Fei Gu still couldn't believe that He Mina would love him wholeheartedly, especially since he still had that bad problem, and he would have regular attacks.

He rarely dreams that He Mina is leaving him, in this few dreams, he always drives alone, watching the scenery along the way, at first he will not think of He Mina's existence at all, but at the end of the dream, he will always suddenly find that He Mina is not around, and then his heart becomes painful, it is difficult to breathe, and he wakes up in such a feeling, and his whole body is covered with cold sweat.

Fei Gu believed in the intuition of dreams, which must be something in the future, so he never told He Mina his secret until the man appeared.

Fei Gu didn't know until he died what kind of wonderful drama that the man performed in front of him back then, but after that, Fei Gu wanted to use him in turn, which could be regarded as smoothing out the behavior of the two people.

However, in any case, the days by the side of his adoptive parents, although he was often blinded, often reprimanded, and often heard the dissatisfied sighs of the people around him, was the only pure land in Fei Gu's entire life.