Chapter 52: Deep Doubts Before Departure
"Can you find a way to contact Emperor Tong?" I need to get in touch with Emperor Tong.
First, whether it is him or me, we still have the two largest demon hunter forces, and in this troubled world, we must communicate with each other.
Second, it is the news of Xinyi. Back then, I made a deal with Emperor Tong about the dungeon, and he probably told me about the rules for entering the dungeon. It's just that under the chaos at that time, I already have some vague memories, and I probably only remember that the dungeon can only be entered on certain days, otherwise I have to find certain characters.
Now, I have decided to set out and go to the dungeon, so naturally I want to contact the Child Emperor.
Of course, Tina also knows the need to contact Emperor Tong, but the first point is already inadmissible, and as for the second point, there is no need to let all the people present who care about me know.
"The head of the family, the contact information of the water boy's family, I naturally have it. However, in the village, the phone is very inconvenient, and you need to borrow your satellite phone. Tina explained it to me.
This time is also a coincidence, in the convenience of contacting people, satellite phones have contributed a lot, and from the moment Dr. Qin handed it to me, I didn't expect it to play such a huge role.
"Naturally, there is no problem with this, I just hope to contact Emperor Tong as soon as possible." I said lightly.
"I don't dare to guarantee it, because Emperor Tong himself is often uncertain. It can only be said that I will contact the water boy's house and see the situation again. Tina said to me seriously.
I nodded, and there was a wave of exhaustion, even the wound between the ribs was faintly painful, and I had not had a good rest since I escaped.
"Go and rest for a while, young master. I'm here for everything. Su Ling's soft voice sounded in my ears, no matter who I am, I will always be the young master in her mouth.
I nodded involuntarily, I wanted to sleep, my consciousness was blurred almost at the same time, and I just said to Su Ling: "If you find Emperor Tong, you must contact me as soon as possible." ”
Then, I was taken to the bedroom by Su Ling, and I almost can't remember how he fell asleep on the bed.
I just remember that in the dream, I seemed to have returned to Nie Yan's era, but I was already dead, but I repeatedly saw a figure walking in the snow, I called her loudly, she shouldn't, I sometimes remember that I was dead, and sometimes I felt that I still had a strong existence.
I don't know how long this entanglement lasted, until Wanwan approached a barren ruin, and she seemed to be tired at last, so she also stopped, and sat down on a large rock to rest.
I recognize this ruin, isn't it Xiaolong Town, which was once burned down by me? Did Wanwan come here with my stump? But in the dream, I was conflicted, thinking about my stump and feeling alive, and I could even stride towards the bowl, closing the distance that I had been unable to catch up with her before.
"Bowls." I shouted again.
This time, she seemed to have a slight reaction to my voice, and her body moved slightly.
I was full of joy, and I wanted to get closer to her even faster, isolated for thousands of years, this kind of longing can no longer be described as unforgettable, but has become a habit, like breathing.
It's not that it doesn't hurt, it's not that it doesn't love, but it's used to bear a person's loneliness and hopelessness to love her, and it's also used to escape the slightest wisp of thought.
This emotion cannot explode, and once it does, it goes crazy.
It's like now, she never looks back in her dreams, but I feel like I can chase it for the rest of my life.
"Bowls." I gasped and finally stood behind her, and she seemed to have fully heard my call, her body trembling, her shoulders shaking, as if she was crying.
I wanted to see her face again, but I didn't know why, but in my dream, I couldn't move a single step, just stood behind her in a daze.
"I know, you're here." Her voice was as good as ever, so soft, like a spring breeze blowing through my chest.
I opened my mouth to say something, but she suddenly said, "Don't speak, listen to me." There is no more sensitive existence in this world than the sky fox, and a wisp of your thoughts arises from the heart, even if it is thousands of miles away, thousands of years, I can always feel it. When you miss me most intensely. ”
I'm starting to trance, am I in a dream? Or I'm already back in the old days.
"Even if it is a soul, but after living two lives, two lives as a human being, it has been sublimated into another you, because there will be a lot more. For example, new memories, new spiritual realizations, new concerns, and many, many new ones. I'm glad to have you in this life, and you in the next life shouldn't be entangled in me. Wanwan's voice began to choke at this.
I am in a hurry, no matter what new things are added, the essence is me, what does not change will always change, why do you say this?
"Wanwan, look back at me." I have a thousand words, but they have become such a sentence.
She turned around, except for the paler, still the way she remembered, her eyes looked at me with tears in her eyes, and at that moment, it was so close, but I felt like we were beginning to suddenly distance ourselves, unable to stop, and when it finally froze, it was farther than the moat.
"Don't you understand? All I have in my heart in this life is Nie Yan, and I am glad that when you are Nie Yan, your deep affection is only tied to Wanwan alone. This is a memory that should end, and if it has its own ending, it should not be clinged to anymore. As I spoke, tears rolled down again, and I reached out to wipe her away, but I couldn't touch her.
"You and I once promised each other an afterlife, and you forgot?" I asked word by word, and I couldn't help but feel sad in my heart, because I didn't dare to admit that Wanwan's words were right, and Nie Yan and Wanwan had already had an ending.
"That's thinking, if there is an afterlife, but if you don't think about it, in the next life, even if you meet again and love each other. You are no longer Nie Yan, and I am no longer a bowl, our inheritance is only the fate of the previous life, not the continuation of the love of the previous life, because what happens will be a new beginning, a new everything. Even if your soul is still you, but Nie Yan's life is over, and I, even if I see you again after thousands of years" Wanwan looked up at me.
"How about meeting?" I don't understand what the bowl means.
"I'm not me anymore, because Wanwan only has this life. All people only have this life, no matter whether the soul is reincarnation or rebirth, this life is just that they will not meet exactly the same thing, the same person in this life. If you can't get out of this red dust, everything will be a new reincarnation, and after you get out, how can you be trapped by love again? Wanwan suddenly looked at me and smiled sadly.
Is this the wisdom that belongs to the Sky Fox? Why is it so hard to understand word by word?
My heart is like a knife, it is because of this moment that I began to accept the end of me and her, I am unwilling, I want to hug her into my arms again, but I can't touch her.
I was angry and wanted to scream, at this moment, if I could get a chance to hug her, why didn't I dare to go against the sky? But what about against the sky? At this moment, I still lost to my regret and unwillingness.
Wanwan's smile became farther and farther away, more and more blurred, but finally, when it felt like it was about to shatter in the sky, it suddenly became clear, but I stood on the spot all of a sudden, why did I no longer see Wanwan? It's Xinyi?!
"Bowls!" I cried out in pain, and sat up from the bed at once, it was a cold winter night, let alone a village deep in the mountains. I was covered in sticky sweat, and when I woke up, even the quilt was damp.
"Young Master" Su Ling woke up at my feet all of a sudden, stood up and looked at me at a loss, embarrassed that this girl, guarding me, actually fell asleep at my feet.
It took me a long time to get used to the transition from dream to reality, and Su Ling had already poured me a cup of hot water at this time.
I took it and drank half a bowl, the feeling in my heart was a little settled, but I couldn't erase the heartache and unwillingness, I knew that there was no way to leave this wound to time. But what is it about the weirdness that is so real in the dream? It didn't feel like a dream at all, but like the last time I really met Wanwan.
Leave it to time? Is it really reliable? Thousands of years have passed, and this memory has been forgotten and remembered, and it is still painful and unforgettable.
I put on my coat, got out of bed, and stood in front of the window, not daring to wonder why the smile of the bowl turned into a face of Xin Yi in the end. Is that implying something? Could it be that I am Ye Zhengling's life, and I love Xin Yi? I don't know it? Will there be such a confused love? Or rather
The bystander is clear, just as Lao Zhou understands me and Xin Yi, Chen Chong doesn't understand it? Only I have never been able to define it.
Now that I have to think about it, I feel that if I really want to be with Xin Yi willingly, I still can't accept it, there is something like instinct that is stopping me!
In the end, it was done, I couldn't lose her, I cared about her more than anyone else, but I couldn't accept the state of being with her.
"Young Master, aren't you going to rest for a while? You've only slept for two hours now, and you're restless. At this time, Su Ling was already standing behind me, and his tone was gentle.
She was smart not to ask me who the bowl was? This girl has always been nice, and knows not to do things that make me sad, to say things that make me sad.
"Isn't there any news from the Tong Emperor?" As a result, Su Ling lit the cigarette that Su Ling gave me, and frowned, in order to understand this strange feeling in happiness, and in order to appease myself for so long, I didn't go to Xin Yi for the huge uneasiness caused by it! I want to see Emperor Tong as soon as possible, I can't wait to be in the dungeon right away at this moment!
"Sister Tina has been here once before. The water boy family has been contacted, and the Tong Emperor himself has no news, but the people of the water boy family said that they will find a way to tell them, and I don't know how long this process will take. Su Ling whispered behind me.
I rubbed my face, trying to calm my anxiety, but to no avail.
I suddenly opened my mouth and asked Su Ling: "Su Ling, if there is such a person, it is very important to you." I mean, on weekdays, you don't know how important she is, but you've gotten used to her being in every corner of your life, including spaces that the most intimate and best friends can't reach. Then, you go and know how important she is. How important is it? It's that you can trade her life for her life without hesitation. ”
"Huh?" My words are very abstract, but Su Ling actually understood, could it be that girls are naturally much more understanding of feelings than men?
"But you don't want to be with her. In any case, they don't want to be together. But what does this relationship say? Friends, definitely not friends. Want to say it's a sister? Close relatives? Neither is it! What do you think should be the situation? I frowned and began to try to describe the messy state of mind.
Su Ling tilted his head and thought for a moment, and said, "If this man is said to be in addition to her, he can spend his life with another woman." That means that at this stage, this man has not met the person he really loves, but he is reluctant to let her go, and he doesn't want to destroy the balance between them, because he can't let go. ”
"So selfish?" I asked with a smile, but in fact, I was thinking, can I spend my life with other women? No, absolutely not, I've always felt like I'm supposed to be on the drift alone. Haven't met true love? I love Wanwan so much, but I miraculously found that I can't measure Xin Yi and Wanwan.
It's like, to spend your life with Wanwan, let go of the comparison of Xinyi, you can't do it! It's a weird feeling.
"And what if it isn't?" I asked Su Ling again.
"I'm just guessing, the second possibility, that is, the man is already in love, but there is a hurdle in his heart that he can't get over, so he doesn't want to be with that girl." Su Ling whispered.
I was stunned all of a sudden, I can't get over the hurdle, what is that? And what will it be?
I was suddenly very irritable, and even the cigarette in my hand was pinched off with a force, which made Su Ling ask me worriedly: "Young master, did I say something wrong?" ”
"No, there isn't." I took a deep breath, and then said to Su Ling with a forced smile: "I want to take a bath, if it's not troublesome, help me prepare?" ”
"No, no trouble." Su Ling was very happy, I was finally able to speak normally, instead of saying something specious.
"Su Ling" I hesitated, and then stopped her.
"Huh?"
"Those two things, are they there?" I finally asked, I lost them after coming to the Huonie family's headquarters, and was told that these two things were put away, and if there was no accident, the things should be in the Huonie family.
The eyeball-like pendant, and the white fox fur.