Zhenyang City, a province in southwest China, at the gate of a residential area.

A battery car stopped steadily at the door of the security room, a man wearing a blue uniform, wearing a black frame mirror, a board size, a very clean beard, and a face that looked no more than twenty-four or five years walked down with a large bucket of pure water on the battery car, walked into the security room, knocked on the glass with his hand, and then said with a smile: "Hello, big brother, I will deliver water to Mr. Zhang's house on the fourth floor of Unit 3 of Building 8, please confirm, thank you, I wish you a long life and good health." ”

The security guard looked at the chattering water delivery worker outside, picked up the internal phone and called, and then opened the door to let the water delivery worker in, but after opening the door, he called the water delivery worker into the security room and asked him to register his company and name in the notebook.

The water delivery worker waved his pen and wrote three big characters on it in an extremely ugly font - Tang Shuxing, and then raised his eyes to look at the security guard and said: "Remember me, I am a man who is destined to become a king of money." ”

The baton in the security guard's hand almost fell, and after Tang Shuxing left, the security guard who was watching the monitoring on one side leaned over and looked at his back and said, "Can the mentally retarded deliver water?" ”

Tang Shuxing carried the bucket of water while humming a song while walking towards Building No. 8, along the way also helped the people around him take out the garbage, carry furniture, and help the children pick up the badminton balls on the tree, of course, every time he helped others, he would say that: I am a man destined to become a king of money.

"No. 5 on the fourth floor, this is the house." Tang Shuxing took out the address in his pocket, looked at the "405" written on the door number, and then reached out and knocked on the door, and when he was asked inside, he immediately approached the door and agreed loudly, "Hello, your high-purity pure water has been delivered to your home, please sign for it." ”

"Huh?" Because of the words of the Tang Shu Torture God, the owner of this house did not open the door, but carefully looked at the stranger outside who looked more handsome, but squeezed his eyebrows at the cat's eye, and seemed to be selling cuteness.

"Rest assured, I'm not checking water meters, delivering couriers, or delivering benefits to the community, just delivering water. Trouble opening the door, okay? Tang Shuxing actually stood up and bowed to the door.

The door of this house finally opened, and there was a man wearing glasses and carrying a stick in his hand standing at the door, the man looked Tang Shuxing up and down, nodded and said, "Okay, put the water at the door, you can go." ”

"Wait a minute." Tang Shuxing smiled and said in a low voice, "May I ask if it's Mr. Liu Hua?" I guess your wife is at home at this point, right? ”

"What do you mean? What are you doing? Who are you? Liu Hua clenched the stick in his hand and asked three questions in a row.

Tang Shuxing immediately took a step back, waved his hand mechanically, and said, "Don't get me wrong, I'm not a bad person, I'm just here...... Wait a little longer. Tang Shuxing took out another note, held it high and read, "Please pay off the special service fee of 150 yuan at the Gege Foot Bath Nana at No. 305 Great Ocean Road two days ago, because you have made other requests, so an additional 50 yuan will be charged, a total of 200 yuan, please pay it off, if you don't pay after five minutes, I will charge you interest at 10% of the daily fee." ”

Liu Hua was stunned for a moment, then returned to his previous expression, but lowered his voice and said, "I don't understand what you say, if you don't leave, I'll call the security guard." ”

"Why don't you call the police?" Tang Shuxing raised his Nokia 100-yuan machine and made a gesture to make a call, and Liu Hua immediately stepped forward and pinched it.

Liu Hua said with a threatening surname: "Boy, don't look for trouble, do you know who I am?" Really call the police, I'll find someone to kill you when you go in! ”

"You're the one who went in, right?" Tang Shuxing said expressionlessly, "There are three traffic police monitors outside the Gege foot bath, who can photograph the scene of you entering the house, and everyone in the house can testify that you and Nana entered the room, if you want to call the police to see who dies first." After speaking, Tang Shuxing once again had a smile on his face, leaned close to Liu Hua's ear and whispered, "Big brother, it's super cheap to charge 50 for oral work, and now the market price is 100, and if it's cheap, it's still good, it's not like you, right?" You said that you didn't bring money, on credit, others believed it, but it turned out that you left a ** is fake, you are really a beast, you live in such a big house, and you are still short of that money? ”

After speaking, Tang Shuxing shouted loudly into the house: "It's better to call my sister-in-law......

"Wait!" Liu Hua hurriedly said, pointing at Tang Shu and saying, "I'll go get the money, 200, right?" ”

"220 yuan, you have to collect interest." Tang Shuxing opened his pocket, pointed to the change inside and said, "Don't swipe the card, you can get change, hurry up, I'm in a hurry." ”

Liu Hua quickly took the money out and stuffed it into Tang Shuxing's hands, and didn't let him find the money, but Tang Shuxing quickly found change, moved the water into the door, and then bowed deeply and said, "Thank you for your patronage, please pay another 50 yuan for the carriage and horses." ”

Liu Hua was stunned for a moment, and stuffed back the 50 yuan change that Tang Shu had found before, his face full of anger.

"Okay, thank you again for your patronage, I wish you a long life, good health, all the best, a happy family, Wishing you prosperity......" Before Tang Shuxing finished his words, the door was slammed shut, Tang Shuxing stood there stunned for two seconds, and knocked on the door again.

Liu Hua angrily opened the door and said, "What else do you want to do?" ”

"Nothing." Tang Shuxing smiled, "I just want to tell you that I am a man who is destined to become a money-making king!" After speaking, Tang Shuxing helped Liu Hua close the door, and then hummed a song and left.

Liu Hua was stunned at the door of the house, and he didn't react for a long time, but he was glad that he gave the money, otherwise that neuropathy would definitely kill him. Liu Hua's wife asked who it was in the house? Liu Hua subconsciously replied: "It's the king of making money, no, oh mom, I'm ......"

Tang Shuxing, who came to the elevator, stood there and said to himself: "There are still stinky scoundrels who live in this world and drive more than 200,000 square meters of cars, but they want to get rid of Miss's 200 yuan service fee, it's incredible." After speaking, Tang Shuxing looked at the eleven or twelve-year-old child next to him who was holding a husky, "You said yes?" ”

The child looked at Tang Shuxing with frightened eyes, and at this time the husky screamed, and Tang Shuxing nodded: "It understands......"

The child slowly turned around, then led the dog back to his door, and knocked on the door desperately: "Mom! There's a neurotic in the hallway! ”

"Your uncle, I'm the king of money!" Tang Shuxing said in a low voice, and then walked into the elevator.

Tang Shuxing walked out of the community, rode the battery car to the row of garbage bins in the alley opposite, dragged out the water delivery worker who was knocked unconscious, slowly changed his clothes, and then leaned the water delivery worker next to the battery car, took out 50 yuan and stuffed it into his pocket and said: "Dude, borrow your car and clothes, this 50 yuan is a rental fee, sorry, bye." ”

When Tang Shuxing returned to the old building he rented, the young lady named Nana was already waiting there, Tang Shuxing raised his eyes and saw trotting forward, and said in a low voice: "Hey, you are wearing a miniskirt and dressed like this, you have to let people know what you are doing at a glance?" ”

"That's what I'm supposed to do, what am I afraid of?" Nana said impatiently.

"Eldest sister, there are countless hooligans in this area, and the women of the good family may not dare to make a move, but they are robbing and annihilating in your business. By the way, I'll give you the key and let you go up to my house and wait, why don't you go? Waiting for people to take turns? Tang Shuxing took the key that Nana was sweating in her hand and walked towards the corridor.

"If your girlfriend is home, how bad it is." Nana whispered.

"Hehe......" Tang Shuxing deliberately let out a strange laugh, "Don't play some tricks with me, I don't have a girlfriend, you know, Shanshan knows, everyone within a radius of ten miles knows." I'm a psychopath, forcing one, and you still play this word game to ask me if I have a girlfriend? What's wrong? Want to take me as a little white face? Didn't learn enough from your little white-faced boyfriend last time? Stretched out his hand and asked you to borrow 50,000 yuan, and found a female college student to raise on your back, if I hadn't chased it back for you, you would probably have slit your wrists in the bathtub now! ”

"Brother Xing, when will you be able to change your poisonous tongue? Otherwise, no one in my line of work will want to follow you in the future. Nana followed Tang Shuxing into the house, looking at this rental house that would come almost every other day, although it was not renovated, but it was still spotlessly cleaned, "I just want you to help me vent, who knows that miscellaneous is a big scoundrel." ”

"Remember! You are a young lady, and you are all ladyboards, and those who talk to you about feelings are nothing more than trying to cheat some free emotional cannons. Tang Shuxing took out a bottle of mineral water from the second-hand refrigerator and handed it over, "People who wear glasses are bad people, and contact lenses are also counted!" Saying that, Tang Shuxing took off his pair of flat frame mirrors used for camouflage, and opened his eyes to let Nana look at the pair of contact lenses he was wearing in his eyes, which were still beautiful contacts!

"Big man wears contact lenses, do you think you're still young?" Nana sat on the sofa drinking water, Tang Shuxing took out 200 yuan to her, Nana didn't want to live or die, "I said, just let you help me vent my anger, it's better to beat that bastard!" ”

"Force can solve problems, but it can't solve all problems." Tang Shuxing forced the money into Nana's hand, "Take it!" It's earned by you, and even if it's less than five minutes, it takes a bit of effort. ”

"I don't want it, you can keep it!" Nana stuffed Tang Shu again.

"Hey, I don't dare to ask for it, I'm going to keep this money and it will be struck by lightning, so hurry up and collect it." Tang Shuxing said and took out another 20 yuan, "I've already accepted the hard money, don't push it around, it's not a dinner invitation, as for it?" ”

"Didn't you say you were going to scrape together money to pay off your debts? Although I don't have much money, but ......" Nana said this, seeing Tang Shuxing's expression a little unnatural, she quickly shut up and put the money away, she knew Tang Shuxing's temper too well.

After a long time, Nana, who was silent, suddenly began to undress, and took off quickly, and in a blink of an eye, she only had a pair of underwear left, and then got up straight and walked behind Tang Shuxing, who had just closed the refrigerator door.

As soon as Tang Shuxing turned around, he was startled when he saw Nana who was naked [***], retreated and pressed against the refrigerator, and the ice fruit in his hand fell to the ground: "Yamei Daddy!" Are you an occupational disease? You can strip naked in a few seconds, you think you're on your own variety show! ”

"You don't want money, the debt can only be paid off by meat, and Sister Shanshan said, you have a good job, I also need it, right?" After Nana finished speaking, she knelt down and made a gesture to untie the belt of Tang's torture.

Tang Shuxing covered his pants and flashed to the side: "Aiqing is flat!" I don't have enough money today, I don't have enough money to shoot, don't do this! Tang Shuxing said, Nana turned a deaf ear at all, continued to approach, and had already ripped off the belt.

The belt was torn open, and Nana took out the wet wipes in the makeup bag next to her, and wanted to wipe them for Tang Shuxing, and said, "I said I don't want money, I'll treat you." ”

"Don't invite guests, this is the rule of the rivers and lakes, don't break the rules!" Tang Shuxing jumped directly on the sofa, holding his pants in one hand, and pointed at Nana with the other and said, "Don't come here!" Don't come forward again, or I'll kill myself! ”

Nana didn't care about this, she stepped forward and pounced on Tang Shuxing, and her head was buried directly. Tang Shuxing squirmed upwards like a worm, desperately pressing Nana's head towards the calf position: "Can you massage my legs?" Lick my toes and help me cure my athlete's foot......"

Nana got together, and took off Tang Shuxing's socks directly, and she was really about to speak, Tang Shuxing kicked Nana away, Nana turned over and fell to the ground on all fours, got up and looked at Tang Shuxing angrily, Tang Shuxing quickly sorted out his pants and clothes, and said at the same time: "I'm sorry!" Jianghu rules! You and Shanshan are also sisters, I can't do this, I will play with you when I have the opportunity in the future, I will definitely give money, and tip a lot! ”

Nana knew that Tang Shu had committed two more crimes, and once she committed two crimes, she couldn't easily reverse it, so she had to put on her clothes and say: "Okay, okay, I'll go, I'll go back, but if you need it, come to me at any time, whether it's at home, in the store, it's free reception, and our sisters also receive you for free, who told us that we all owe you favors." I don't understand, how can there be a man in the world who is so stupid × you? ”

Tang Shuxing was about to say his famous sentence when there was a sudden knock on the door. Tang Shuxing was stunned for a moment, and didn't ask who it was, just signaled Nana not to speak, then leaned against the door, grabbed a thing next to him and pinched it in his hand, looked at the cat's eye, and found that there was a somewhat familiar person standing outside the door, very kind-faced, but he couldn't remember it for a while, so he had to ask: "Who?" ”

When Tang Shuxing asked, Nana waved and pointed to the "weapon" in Tang Shuxing's hand, Tang Shuxing didn't care, just motioned for Nana to sit down and not speak, and asked, "Who is it?" ”

"Punishment, it's me, I'm Ji Kefeng." The man who called himself Ji Kefeng outside the door said loudly and knocked on the door again.

"Ji Kefeng?" Hu Shuntang suddenly remembered that Ji Kefeng grew up with him in the armed police compound, and he had met him five years ago, and that time he originally said that he would treat himself to eat self-service cooking, but who knew that when he went to the toilet, he found that the money was not enough, so he simply found an excuse to run away after eating.

It's been five years? This kid even came back to me for money? Tang Shuxing thought of this, and immediately said, "I'm not here, no, you're in the wrong place!" ”

"Open the door! Are you kidding me? Ji Kefeng was a little angry outside the door, "What are you hiding?" I've been looking for you for years? ”

Tang Shuxing helplessly opened the door, spread his hand and said: "If you come to me to pay for the meal five years ago, I'm sorry, I want to die, I don't have money, or I can pay for the debt, I'll wash my buttocks." ”

"What's the matter?" Ji Kefeng was about to explain, but when he saw the strange "weapon" in Tang Shuxing's hand, he subconsciously pointed and asked, "What are you holding?" ”

Tang Shuxing looked down, only to find that what he had grabbed earlier was a masturbator with a female vibrator, and immediately threw it into the cabinet next to him: "That's an acupressure massager!" Are you interested? ”

As soon as Ji Kefeng was about to speak, he saw Nana, who was getting up from the sofa and sorting out her clothes, and was dressed more revealingly, she immediately understood something, and no longer walked into the house, but took a step back and whispered: "You come out, I have something to do with you." ”

"Master Ji, I said I don't have any money!" Tang Shuxing put on a scoundrel look. Because of Ji Kefeng's surname, Tang Shuxing has called "Ji" as "chicken" since he was a child, and simply gave him a nickname called Ji Ye, and after a long time, other Fa Xiao also followed the name of Ji Ye, and Ji Kefeng reluctantly accepted this nickname.

"You owe people money? I'll help you pay it back, how much do you owe? Nana came over with her bag and made a gesture to take out the money, but was gently grabbed by Tang Shuxing and pushed out of the door and pushed out of the door.

Tang Shuxing frowned and looked at Nana and said, "Go back and start work!" Pay attention to safety, don't be deceived again, let's go, hurry up, if you don't leave, I will break off your friendship with you, and I will beat you to death with a tiger and crane double shape and iron sand palm! ”

Nana shook her head, had to turn around and leave, and when Nana went downstairs, Tang Shuxing opened the door and said to Ji Kefeng: "The meal five years ago was because I was in a hurry at the time, not that I owe the debt and play the scoundrel, so let's ......."

"I said it! I'm not here for the money for that meal! Ji Kefeng interrupted Tang Shuxing's words and sighed, "I'm here for your dad and my dad's disappearance." ”

"Bye-bye!" Tang Shuxing heard Ji Kefeng say this, and directly closed the door heavily, but Ji Kefeng's eyes were quick and he raised his hand to hold the door.

Ji Kefeng slammed the door and said, "Tang Shu Punishment!" Are you sick again? Hurry up and open the door! ”

"Five years ago, I said, I don't look for my dad, it doesn't matter to me whether he wants to die or live, you have to find yourself, who knows if they are together? Maybe they're all fucking dead outside! Tang Shuxing also desperately pressed the door inside, "I've been hard enough for more than ten years, and finally luckily, you came to the door again, I said Master Ji, I beg you, hurry back and be your armed police leader!" ”

"Punishment two! Open the door! I'll just ask you a few words! Ji Kefeng continued to push them, and shouted out the nickname of Tang Shuxing. Tang Shuxing has a lot of ideas from a little ghost, and he can do it with a bad idea, others do it and are caught, he can reach the realm of pretending to be stupid and retreating, and because he is the second oldest in the family, he simply calls him the second sentence, which can be regarded as a pun.

"Master Ji, I beg you, go back!" Tang Shu didn't open the door even if he was tortured to death.

"It's useless to beg me!" Ji Kefeng vigorously opened a wide crack at the top of the door, stuffed a few banknotes from the outside, and said, "I'll give money, I know you want money, a hundred yuan for a question!" ”

As soon as Ji Kefeng finished speaking, the door opened, and Tang Shuxing stood at the door energetically, changed his previous tone and appearance, stretched out his hand to arrange the non-existent tie below his neck, and said in a deep voice: "Sir, welcome to the Little Punishment House!" ”