Zuo Guangsi is a liar, he must be a liar, he must be lying to me!!

What do I regret?!! What do I regret?!

At that time, my state of mind was difficult for outsiders to understand.

I have confidence in the resurrection of Yujia, but at the same time I don't have the confidence.

Zuo Ci's self-inflicted death, Zuo Guangsi's words, all of which are torturing my heart that was slowly calming.

Maybe I've never been so manic.

Under Zuo Guangsi's words, I completely lost my confidence.

"Luo Nengjue, the old-timers all said that I can succeed, I will definitely succeed" I smashed the empty liquor bottle on the ground, and the sound of breaking glass immediately attracted the attention of the little Buddha who had just returned to the store.

The little Buddha pushed the master over without saying a word, looked at me with a frown, and didn't squeak for a long time.

"Mr. Yi, what's wrong with you?" The master asked suspiciously.

"Let me ask you a question."

I raised my head, looked at my master with scattered eyes, and asked very seriously, "If a person dies, can he still come back to life?" ”

Master stared at my face for a long time and shook his head.

"I don't know what to do."

I stood up in a hurry, approached the master nervously, and asked tremblingly, "Can a person come back to life if he dies?" ”

The master didn't answer me again, frowned, and called the guy on the side.

"What's going on in front of Mr. Yi? He seems to be a little"

"We don't know what to do, it's just an old man who came." The guy said helplessly: "Brother Yi chatted with the old man for a while, we weren't there at the time, and that's it after we came back." ”

The master was going to continue to ask, but before he could say anything, I had already grabbed his arm and asked him with red eyes.

"Can a person come back to life when he dies?"

Little Buddha frowned and broke my hand away from the master's arm, then grabbed me by the collar and lifted me up, and said impatiently: "I answer your question, if a person dies, he is dead, and he definitely can't."

"Little Buddha !!"

The person who interrupted the little Buddha's words was the master.

I didn't understand why the master would interrupt the little Buddha at that time, until a long time later, the master talked to me, a half-dead person, about this incident, he said: "I don't know what the little Buddha will tell the little Buddha to shut up, I just feel it, your eyes at that time were very scary, I didn't joke with you, really, it's scary." ”

Little Buddha has always listened to his master's words, and when he saw that his master told him to shut up, Little Buddha also shrugged his shoulders and let me go, and didn't say anything more.

"Mr. Yi, calm down first." The master smiled bitterly and said, "You drank too much." ”

I shook my head: "I didn't drink much. ”

"I said, you've drunk too much." The master said softly.

I stood up with a smile, took a few steps back, and suddenly raised my hand, and the table was overturned on the ground, and the soup and water on the table were also spilled on the ground.

The little Buddha scolded and was about to come up to do it, but was stopped by the master.

"You don't believe that people can be resurrected after death," I smiled and lowered my head, not knowing who I was talking to, as if talking to myself.

"In this world, there are ghosts, monsters, and everything, but you don't believe that the dead can come back to life for anything?!!"

"!! Why don't you believe me!! Can the dead really come back to life!! It's true!!! ”

I squatted on the ground with my head in severe pain, my already hoarse voice began to feel a little overwhelmed, and the roar became more and more harsh.

"You believe me!! Believe me!!! I really can."

As I spoke, I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head, and I lost consciousness as soon as it was dark.

Before falling into a coma, I vaguely heard the words of the little Buddha.

"He's drunk too much, take him back to his room to rest, you guys clean up here."

When I was in a coma, I felt like I was having a dream.

Everything in the dream made me rejoice, Yujia came back to life, and even the old man was saved by me.

Everyone was together, eating hot pot in that tattered wreath shop.

The old man said that he couldn't make trouble if he put too many chili peppers.

Zhou Yan said that there was too little meat, so I asked me to hurry up and buy some to add vegetables.

Hai Dongqing said

"Meow"

As my face itched, I sat up violently with my head covered and meowed.

Now it seemed to hit the cat's head, it screamed in pain, and stretched out its paws to scratch me a few times, but unfortunately the pants I was wearing were too thick, and it didn't seem to be able to scratch.

Just as I was about to apologize to the little guy, a situation that would inevitably arise after drinking too much was born.

The uncontrollable feeling of vomiting suddenly appeared in my body, as if I couldn't resist the reality that I couldn't resist, and I couldn't seem to resist this deep hatred of pain.

While covering my mouth, I ran wildly in the direction of the toilet.

When I was lying on the toilet and vomiting dizzy, there was a knock on the door, followed by the voice of the little Buddha.

"Are you awake?"

I wasn't going to talk, but my vomiting was clearly answering him, and I was awake and it was hard.

"Come out and talk, I'll wait for you in your room." Little Buddha said, and then there was no sound.

Ten minutes later, I rinsed my mouth in front of the washstand, rubbed my eyes and went back to my room, and sat down in front of the little Buddha.

The little Buddha took one look at me, threw the cigarette case to me, and lit it himself.

"What's wrong with you, can you tell me?" Little Buddha asked.

I silently took out the lighter, fiddled with it in my hand a few times, pressed the shrapnel, and the flames burst out in an instant.

There was no light in the room, and the curtains couldn't remember when I had pulled them to death, but the dim light of the fire in my hand flickered, reflecting the faces of me and Little Buddha with different expressions.

The little Buddha looked curious, and I had a look on my face, oh, by the way, I seemed to be expressionless at that time

"When I came in, I found that you didn't turn on the lights, and I didn't turn them on either, is it enough to respect your opinion." Little Buddha smiled and diverted the topic.

"Thank you."

"Tell me about it, satisfy my curiosity." Little Buddha asked again.

I was stunned, and my fiddling with the lighter suddenly stopped, not knowing what to answer him.

After the firelight disappeared, the room fell into darkness, and there seemed to be no other glowing point except for the cigarette in the mouth of the little Buddha, which was still flickering with sparks.

After a long silence, I said, "Little Buddha." ”

"Huh?"

"You say, shouldn't I have taken this path in the first place?"

The little Buddha was stunned, not understanding which path I was talking about.

"After that incident, if I hadn't chosen to live with you and my master, and just died happily, such as jumping off a building or something, would everything be different?"

At the time, I didn't know what I was going to say about it, and in hindsight, I didn't figure out the answer.

A long time later, I heard from a friend that it happened that he was also surnamed Yi.

"Ninety percent of people have thought about dying and want to end this fucking life by ending their lives, you should be ten percent of the strong people, right?" After listening to my story, the man smiled and showed no belief in my experience, but he enjoyed it, as if listening to the story: "How else would you have survived until now?" Isn't it? ”

In fact, I wanted to tell him at the time that I thought about suicide.

Really, sometimes I really think it's good to die.

You don't have to live in this world to play for a goal that doesn't know the outcome

You don't have to live alone in this fucking world

"Holy shit, I think you're not such a fucked person." The little Buddha said in surprise, even if I couldn't see his face clearly in the dark, I could still feel his disdainful expression: "Do you just let the God of Wealth get away with it?" You don't even have a revenge? ”

"That's what I said." I said, and fell silent again.

"Why do you feel like you're going to die? Why don't I take you to a psychiatrist? Little Buddha asked me a little worriedly.

I thought about it for a moment and replied, "I won't die until I kill all the damned people, so you have to help me"

"What can I help you?"

"Help me find everyone out, help me find what I want, I can't wait any longer, the three-year period has passed so long, if I continue to wait" I buried my head deeply, trembled and said: "Little Buddha, you will help me, you will definitely help me, right?" ”

The little Buddha didn't speak again, he listened quietly or looked at me, I don't know what he was thinking.

"I could go three years without killing all the damned people, but I had to find everything"

"If I don't get her back to life"

I laughed inexplicably, my voice full of bitterness that I could understand: "Maybe my life is really meaningless." ”

"If you fail, you'll die?" The little Buddha finally opened Chrysostom.

"Win or die." I smiled happily: "Don't worry, before I die, all the damned people will die, and they will all bury me"

"Are you crazy?!"

"No, I'm sober, I just feel a little tired from living."