Chapter 66

――In this medieval European dungeon world, the points have been maxed out, and now you can go back?

This good news that came suddenly was like a rolling thunder that fell from the sky with a torrential rain, rumbling in the ears of Knight Levi, and in the depths of his heart, it set off a stormy wave in an instant.

So, does Levi Knight want to go back to the original world?

Do you need to ask this question? I think about it, of course I really want to think about it

To be exact, he had waited too long for this day

Although in the original world, Levi was just a poor and unemployed otaku, and he was looked down upon everywhere he went. In this world of Europe, he was a lord of high status, and now he wore the laurel crown of a paladin, and the monarchs and nobles of all countries had to treat him politely, and everywhere he went, he was hugged and worshipped by thousands of people, and he could be called the star of medieval Europe - it can be called a huge gap.

But, in Levy's eyes, so what?

As a time-traveler who had been an aristocrat in medieval Europe for several years, Li Wei knew very well that in those romantic romance novels and costume movies, the so-called "aristocratic life" touted by the literati was so exquisite, elegant, and high-quality, and in the eyes of modern citizens, it was actually so ridiculous, monotonous, boring, and shoddy. But that doesn't mean their ancestors are the same.

Think about it, for the lords and aristocrats of medieval Europe, their requirements for the quality of life could only be achieved in the following way:

1. A large manor house covering an area of dozens of hectares with a fortified castle and a moat;

2. Dozens to hundreds of male and female servants, including attendants and guards;

3. A small carriage inlaid with gold and silver, carved with a magnificent family coat of arms;

Fourth, a few high-grade horses of good breed can not be too cheap when participating in hunting activities among nobles;

5. Gorgeous clothes decorated with lace and silk and gold and silver threads;

6. Occasionally participate in salon balls and ceremonies in high society.

However, at the price of enjoying this life, they had to endure the usual battles as eating and dressing, they had to wear heavy armor, and they had to carry swords and spears in their hands, and they hid in thick castles every day - most castles were usually not very spacious, and the largest rooms were only more than 1o square meters, and it seemed difficult to even turn around after putting on the armor and being fully armed, and sleeping in them had to beware of internal intrigues, and many nobles had to arrange one or two faithful servants in their bedrooms even if they went to bed, This makes it easier to respond to emergencies such as assassination or sneak attacks.

Let's put it this way, the security situation in most parts of medieval Europe was probably similar to that of the Iraq and Afghanistan theaters in the 21st century.

Such a highly tense wartime life was obviously very uncomfortable, and in short, Levi often felt that he had a somewhat nervous breakdown.

In the same way, no matter how much the poets sang the praises of the beauty of the countryside, the life of the country manor was not so pleasant, and the serfs all had to get up early and live in the manor, growing grain, grinding flour, making wine, chopping wood, carrying water, raising pigs, feeding chickens...... Of course, this qiē toil had nothing to do with the noble lords, the problem was that the stinky little things were probably walking around the lord's living room.

What is even more difficult to adapt to is that in this era, even ordinary metals are frighteningly valuable, and often in those supposedly wealthy families, only the head of the family can enjoy the heavy and simple (in fact, ugly and ugly) iron bowls and tin cups, and the rest can only eat in clay pots and wooden bowls...... But no matter what kind of tableware it is, it is the same rough and unhygienic in the eyes of modern people. As for the smooth porcelain and glassware, which are more precious luxuries than silverware, and in Europe at this time they are regarded as collectibles rather than daily necessities, and who is willing to use them indiscriminately?

There are also upper-class salon balls, which are actually just like that, similar to modern company colleagues drinking together after work. There is also a bunch of unappetizing intrigues mixed in with each other. Usually you can only eat some salted meat, salted fish and sausages, at most a tender chicken, some pepper and other oriental spices, and some freshly brewed wine, and you can already boast about it for weeks.

In addition, the ornate carriages of the nobles, though striking and decorated like modern Indian trucks covered with statues of gods, had to travel on bumpy dirt roads, at any time at risk of breaking down, and were in danger of being robbed by bandits, and even if they were able to step out of the carriage "elegantly" at their final destination, they would usually show their hats slanted and scattered, and perhaps fall to the ground at any moment due to numbness in their hands and feet. Hunting was a very dangerous sport, and countless unfortunate nobles died in the hunt - this day hunting did not even have shotguns and metal crossbows, with rough iron swords and rudimentary wooden bows, with the three-legged cat skills of Levi, a modern time-traveler, usually a few pheasants and rabbits should be called a good harvest, and the foxes never caught up, if they ran into a bear or a wolf...... If you didn't say it, hurry up and leave first

In short, there are no computers, no internet, no telephones, no gas stoves or electric stoves - and this is not very important given that most of the people who cross over to people who don't need to cook their own meals - no heating, no air conditioning, no flush toilets, no sewers, no showers, and people defecating everywhere...... Such a deplorable quality of life is not something that a title of nobility can compensate.

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From Levi's point of view, the only place where life in medieval Europe can be better than modern is probably the easier to find a woman - he was closely watched by his time-traveler wife Zhao Na before, so Levi can still keep the bottom line and not have an affair, and he is barely a good husband. After Zhao Na, who was pregnant with Liujia, was sent back to give birth, the knight Levi, who couldn't hold back his thoughts, began to look for beauty and linger in the flowers: relying on the dazzling title of "Paladin" and his handsome good skin, he first hooked up with a bunch of aristocratic ladies, romantic widows, and became the guests of the Queen of Naples, and from time to time he also found some peasant girls and city girls to change their tastes...... According to a certain gossip that Wang Qiu heard that did not know the truth or falsehood, this product even once turned into a Loli control monster Shu Xiao, and had a leg with the twelve-year-old little queen of England, which really made people want to raise money to buy gasoline and burn this scum

But according to Comrade Levi's brazen statement, after the initial forbidden pleasure, the real feelings brought to him by these beauties from Western Europe actually disappointed him very much -- those white women of the upper class of the Middle Ages, although they were jeweled, blue-eyed, and had a snow-white complexion, had a different charm compared with Oriental women. But the problem is that the skin is rough to the touch, and it is pitted, always with many bumps and red spots. Even if the sweat and dirt have been washed away, there is still a faint smell of fox - even the best perfume can't completely hide it.

No way, in this era, it is difficult for even the most exquisite ladies to take a bath every day, and even a woman who takes a bath once a week is one in ten thousand. Being able to wash your face, hands and feet frequently, change your clothes every few days, and take a shower once a month is already the limit.

The body odor of aristocratic women is still like this, and the quality of the folk women and village girls is even more impressive, even if they look beautiful from a distance, as long as they get a little closer, they can feel that under their pink and snow-white faces, their necks and backs are actually jet black, from head to jade arms, all exuding a strong body odor, that terrifying breath is really a top wind stink, and the wind stinks, so that Li Wei almost has an urge to kick them out of bed

So, in order to prevent himself from pinching his nose and going to bed, Levi held his sisters and had to push them into the bathtub to take a bath before rolling the sheets - although the mandarin duck bath is also a very enviable thing, but the problem is repeated again and again, Levi is almost unclear whether he is here to find a beautiful hunt to have an affair to enjoy the female body, or to be a volunteer bath worker in the women's bathroom...... Not to mention that these scrubbed girls often don't appreciate it

-- Although large bathhouses and steam baths had already appeared in many European cities on the eve of the Black Death, there was no absurd custom of strictly forbidding bathing in modern Europeans. Doraemon also did a lot of work to popularize hygiene knowledge during this time, but the traditional concept of "bathing = depraved luxury" is still very deeply rooted in the hearts of the people (at that time, the European bathroom was actually more similar to the Dongguan shampoo room, bathing and prostitution ♂ were often one), and it was difficult to shake for a while. The more devout Christians are, the more stubborn they are in refusing to bathe...... Therefore, the playboy Levi often encounters the woman who is happy to strip naked and roll the sheets with him, but refuses to jump into the bathtub to take a shower.

Of course, there may be some strong-hearted traverser who can ignore the feces on the ground, the leaky roofs, and the stinking women who don't like to bathe, shout "The strong human touch here cannot be compared to the cold modern reinforced concrete forest", and happily roll on the lice and flea beds with the first female creature willing to mate with him, and happily create the next generation...... But unfortunately, Levi, an older otaku, definitely does not belong to this kind of strong and brave people, and the hygiene and eating problems alone have given him a headache for a long time, and he has never felt a strong human touch here, only a strong body odor. All in all, from the beginning of the crossing, his aristocratic dream was almost awake.

Therefore, for the mediocre daily life of modern urban life, who has given up these seemingly prominent identities and statuses, and has changed from a majestic paladin back to a plague-headed citizen, His Excellency Levi, who has no ambitions, is absolutely not rejected at all, and there is no psychological barrier at all.

――As for the question of women, he has actually already thought about it, even in the modern world, is it difficult to find a few ♀ call girls to play with the sheets? As long as you can get the money in your hand, what Russian golden cat Yanma, French bold girl, Japanese aid social female high school student, South American samba dancer, is not at the customer's choice? Those modern Western white girls who have bathed and used various skin care products and protective products since childhood are much stronger than these stinky medieval European women, anyway, through Guò's looting and tossing in medieval Europe, he also bought a small treasury, at least tens of millions of yuan of net worth is still there. And taking advantage of the opportunity of the outbreak of the great plague, Levi has already been injected with the highest-grade [Invincible Universal Vaccine] by Doraemon, what kind of AIDS, syphilis and other flower willow diseases are absolutely not to worry about within the twenty-year immunity period. As for twenty years later...... He estimated that his body bones had long since decayed, and he should no longer be able to play.

Of course, don't think about extravagant things like marital fidelity and temperance, in the eyes of Levi, who has now fallen in all directions, discipline is probably a word that can only appear in heaven, and usually does not exist in real society.

However, Knight Levi also believes that there seem to be some minor technical issues that need to be solved before he can truly say goodbye to this world.

-- Although Levi has lagged behind after many years of training, and his temperance has fallen sharply, he still has some ...... in the most basic sense of family responsibility

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“…… Speaking of which, my wife has been out of this world for a few days, how is she doing now? And what about my son? ”

Facing the cold wind of the night mixed with snowflakes, after bowing his head and muttering for a while, Levi did not choose to answer directly, but changed the topic and asked.

“…… Please rest assured, Brother Levi, the obstetrics and gynecology hospital is all right, after all, it is advanced technology in the 22nd century. Your son is very healthy, and he is two days away from the full moon, and your wife Zhao Na plans to be discharged from the hospital after the full confinement...... Well, although according to the date here, your son has been born for far more than a month, but the time lapse of the two worlds is not the same, and I thought you should know this......"

Halfway through speaking, seeing that Li Wei seemed to be frowning, Wang Qiu hurriedly added, "...... The medical expenses paid in advance are also sufficient. ”

“…… Well, of course I know about that, but there's a problem that still worries me. ”

Levi scratched his head and said with a wry smile, "...... Although Zhao Na and I are already old husbands and wives, and even our sons have been born, but in modern China, we still have not registered our marriages. ”

-- I have to admit that this is indeed a very real problem......

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