There is an old Chinese saying: "There is no rain in the sky, and there is no marriage without a matchmaker on the ground". Pen, fun, pavilion www. biquge。 info matchmakers play a huge role in traditional Chinese marriage. The marriage ceremony has repeatedly emphasized: "The words of the matchmaker of the parents", the words of the matchmaker are the most critical and play the role of a bridge, so the matchmaker is also called: matchmaking.

The matchmaker is called "Popsicle Lord" and "Matchmaker", and the matchmaker is also called "being a matchmaker, holding a cup, and being a matchmaker". Although the profession of matchmaker is not noble, it is not lowly either, whether it is a large family or a flat-headed common people, men and women cannot marry without the improvisation of matchmakers.

In ancient times, men and women paid the most attention to whether they were intimate or not, and before a woman got married, she usually did not go out of the door and did not step out, and she was deeply saddened. When it comes time to talk about marriage, there will be matchmakers who take the initiative to come to the door to "pick up work" to match men and women, or parents who are worried about their children's marriages and entrust matchmakers to talk about matchmaking.

Matchmakers are full-time and part-time, and generally speaking, matchmakers are people who can speak well. The matchmaker said that matchmakers are generally of comparable appearance, men are matched with women, and rotten pots are matched with rotten stoves. Generally, large families pay attention to three mediators and six appointments, among which there are many courtesies, and the more courtesies, the more generous the matchmaker's remuneration.

The matchmaker is entrusted by the person to be loyal to the person, and if he is said to be a matchmaker, he can get a sum of money, which is called "thank the matchmaker". This money is generally paid by the man, or by the woman in the case of an inverted door. In rural areas, in order to get married, the matchmaker has to go through several rounds, and the general procedures are divided into: seeing relatives (blind date), pouring tea (engagement), setting the world (fixing relatives), and marrying (welcoming relatives).

The first time the two parties meet is called a blind date, the matchmaker takes the man to the woman, the man and the woman meet for the first time, and the woman's parents will open the "eight characters", and write the date of birth of the girl to be married.

The second meeting is called engagement, and the man generally hands over the woman's birthday to the fortune teller to arrange the four pillars, and calculates that the two parties do not rush to the k, and then chooses a good day and an auspicious day to engage. On the day of engagement, the matchmaker came to the woman with a big red envelope prepared by the man, and the woman would pour tea for the man, and the man would take the tea and give the woman a big red envelope by the way, and stay with the woman for a meal. The woman agrees to leave the man for dinner, and the big red envelope is equivalent to an engagement gift.

If the engagement is successful, the matchmaker will get double wages, and if it is not successful, the man must also pay a little travel expenses. In short, matchmakers can't run errands in vain, and everyone understands the truth that there are no idlers in the world.

After the engagement, during the New Year's holiday, the man wants to go to the woman to send the festival, and sometimes the man invites the matchmaker to go together, one to express the number of courtesies, and the other to get closer to the relationship and communicate feelings. If the relationship is closer, the matchmaker will come forward, and the two parties will discuss the matter of marriage. If they don't get along, the man first proposes to break up and return the eight characters, and the expenses paid before will not be paid at all, which is called "quitting relatives"; If the woman does not agree, the woman must return all the expenses incurred by the man, which is called "settling accounts". Of course, this phenomenon is very rare. Whether it is a divorce or a "reckoning", the matchmaker must be present to testify, and the matchmaker's hard-earned money is paid by the party who is at fault, just like hiring a lawyer to fight a lawsuit.

After the engagement, the test time is generally one year, and after one year, the marriage is fixed, and the man prepares various gifts to send to the woman, and the family affairs are officially settled, and the relationship between the two parties is one step closer, and the matchmaker is indestructible. In order to be foolproof, the matchmaker first goes to the woman, asks for the woman's opinion, and transfers the woman's request to the man, if the man is in difficulty, entrust the matchmaker to go to the woman to discuss again, as little as possible, if the woman is willing, not greedy for money, will consider the man's family economy, as long as "pass by the courtesy", do not lose the number of rudeness. And the man will be grateful to the woman. The man will give the matchmaker appropriate errand money, try to achieve the matchmaker's satisfaction, and pave the way for the next step of marriage. The more benefits the matchmaker gets, the more positive and hard-working he becomes, and for the sake of the man's interests, he will do his best to say all the good things.

The fourth step is to welcome the family. Before the wedding, the matchmaker had frequent activities, running at both ends, passing the word for both parties, until the man and woman reached an agreement, and then prepared the bride price. The day before getting married, the man prepared chickens, ducks, elbows, shoes and socks, and fabrics to be sent to the matchmaker's house, which was called the "thank you matchmaking gift". The matchmaker received the gift, took command in person, took the wedding team, and went to the woman with the bride price. This time, the matchmaker must bring a child of his own, which is called "good things come in pairs". In addition to the matchmaker, there is also a key person in the matchmaking team - Mr. Press. Mr. Presser must be a respectable, broad-minded, and eloquent gentleman who is responsible for dealing with the woman's difficulties. In order to make the marriage a success, he will invite the woman's relatives to the man as a guest with a smile on his face. When the bride enters the man's Cao Gate, she must hold an umbrella and wait for the man to drive away evil spirits before entering the house. In the past, the worship ceremony was indispensable, but now, the customs have changed, and the woman has entered the door, which is a family, helping the man with housework or entertaining guests.

At the wedding banquet, the matchmaker is pushed to the upper seat, the bride and groom must toast the matchmaker, the matchmaker drinks or not, how much to drink, the meaning of the meaning, say a few words of blessing, this is called "round media" or "open media". After the round media, the man's parents will seal a sum of money with red paper, and the amount of money will be determined according to the family conditions, but it will definitely not be less than double the salary. The matchmaker took the red envelope and said some auspicious words, and both parties were happy.

The above are some of the statements from women to men, and men to women will also go through a similar process, whether it is a man to a woman or a woman to a man, the responsibilities and treatment of the matchmaker will not change.

Being a matchmaker is a very popular profession, and the number of traditional Chinese marriage rituals makes matchmakers have no sense of crisis of unemployment. With the further deepening of reform and opening up, the concept of freedom of marriage prevails in the younger generation, and the profession of matchmaker is gradually falling cold. The matchmaker's profession began to change, from the purpose of planting flowers to the purpose of making a fortune. Partnering as a matchmaker has given rise to a new concept in people's minds -- matchmakers. Generally speaking, people will not entrust a matchmaker to be a matchmaker, unless the old bachelor is lonely and unbearable, he will pay for troubles.