Mr. Shen:

See the words as you go!

I haven't seen him for more than a month since I said goodbye this autumn, and I don't know if my husband is okay now.

Winters in Peking have always been very cold. Since I left home to study in Beiping, I always have to fall seriously ill every winter, and I have to take care of my husband so that I don't die of illness in a foreign land. Now that my husband and I are separated from each other, every time I think of the wind and snow in Beiping, I am very worried that my husband will be sick from the cold like me. But thinking that my husband has always been in good health, and he has never missed anything due to illness in the past few years with me, and naturally he will not be like me, and he can't go out when the wind blows, this matter should be too much for me to worry about.

Since I left Beijing and returned home, I have traveled to several provinces, and now I am not far from home, please don't worry about it.

At the time of writing this letter, I am on the ferry home, and I will be in the port early tomorrow morning, and in half a day's journey, I will be able to reach my old house. When I get home, I will also see Sister Gulan, and I will say hello to her for my husband when the time comes. As soon as the letters I had written to my husband were delivered, they sank into the sea and I did not hear back, and I wonder if he did not receive them or did not want to reply to me.

These are trivial matters to me, and whether he responds or not, I should continue to write to him. Sir, don't be embarrassed, whether he wants to continue to listen to me or not, I am more than willing to tell him what is on my mind as before. If the gentleman thinks that my letters are too frequent, he doesn't want to read them. I only hope that my husband will throw this letter into the brazier, and I will be happy if I can keep him warm.

On the way home, I often tossed and turned, and I couldn't sleep all night. Closing my eyes is what Mr. said when I parted with him, and the tone of his actions and tone is like yesterday's scene for me, and I can't forget it. At that time, I was so angry and willful that I said goodbye to my husband and never saw each other again in this life. Mr. is as important to me as Mount Tai, and I will never regard Mr. as an enemy and never see him again. What I said and did that day must have made my husband very sad. I also regretted it, and every time I thought about it, I burst into tears, and I just wished that I could not go back to that day, give me a slap at that time, and wake up the vexatious girl. Now that the big mistake has been cast and there is no way to do it, I just hope that Mr. will be unscrupulous when I am a child, and I will not take it to heart.

A few days ago, I received a letter from my father on the road, in which he mentioned that my family had already arranged a family affair for me, and the other party was the son of a wealthy businessman who had known my father for many years. When I return home this time, I am afraid that I will inevitably meet each other for dinner, and if the parents of the two parties can talk, I want to come to this lifelong event will be decided in this way. And once I get married, the day when I return to Peking will be far away, and I don't know when I will be able to see my husband again. I wonder if my husband will occasionally remember me in his spare time when he is reading and writing.

As I write this, I think of the many teachings that my husband has taught me in the past few years. You have always hoped that I could become an independent new woman, and you have always taught me that I should control my life by myself, not let my parents decide the major events of my life, and learn to fight and struggle. It's a pity that in my life, I have saved more than ten years of courage and enthusiasm, and I am afraid that I will not have the heart to think about another person as much as I think about you, Mr. On that day, I asked my husband to come out and talk about my thoughts, and I dared to give it a go because of your encouragement, sir. But I didn't expect Mr.'s words to make me completely break this thought, since this is the case, it is better to find someone to marry, everyone is right, and there are many things in his family that need to rely on his father, and he will not be bullied if he marries. After all, a girl will marry someone one day, which one is not to marry? As far as I am concerned, the men of this world, if they are not you, sir, no matter who they are, there is no difference.

When Mr. first taught us English, there were more than a dozen girls in the whole class, and Mr. was the best for me. He would occasionally come to my house to teach me how to write and draw. I was young, and I admired my husband very much, and I misunderstood him as a matter of course, thinking that he was the same as me, and we were actually happy with each other. Now that I think about it, my husband has always treated me like a child, polite and courteous, without the slightest transgression. Those unwarranted thoughts that turn back and forth are probably just my own thoughts. My husband came to teach me how to write and draw, but I had to come because of the hypocrisy with my father.

Having said that, I still can't believe what my husband said that day. Is there really a woman in this world who is as Mr. said? She must have the appearance of a charming city, and her personality is gentle and virtuous, and she can also communicate with her husband. Even if this is the case, I am not willing to give up my husband to her, but unfortunately I met my husband too late and missed the opportunity. If I can get acquainted with her and her husband, maybe the person who Mr. is thinking about every day today is me.

Writing this, the sky outside is gradually getting brighter, and I remember the days when my husband took me to climb the mountain early to see the sea of clouds in the morning sun, and those years were the happiest period of my life. Mr. is so knowledgeable that I can't match it if I think I've spent my whole life. I have always admired Mr. as a person, and I agree with what Mr. said about "enjoying life", but I still want to admonish Mr. like my father: Now in troubled times, Mr. has learned through the past and the present, has the world in mind, and has traveled around the world, and knows the West very well, why do you insist on staying in a school to be a small teacher? With the talent of a gentleman, if you want to seek a half-official position, it must not be difficult. At that time, Mr. naturally did not need to grieve himself, and he made a fire to cook by himself, and was exposed to the sun in summer and freezing in winter. What's more, now is the time to employ people, talents like Mr. must be regarded as treasures, and they will never neglect Mr.

Although what I said this is contrary to my husband's consistent insistence, I still hope that my husband must think twice, think more about his future, and never end up in poverty and destitute for the sake of a momentary pleasure. If Mr. reads this, and still thinks that the people around you are persuading every day, it is better to talk nonsense, just take my above paragraph as nonsense, and forget it after sleeping. I never want to be estranged from my husband as a layman who is chasing fame and fortune.

The ship is about to dock, and my letter is almost over, so let me tell you another interesting story.

When I was a child, my family used to tell me that when I was born, a village man from an unknown country came to my house and knocked on my door, asking me to marry him at home, and when I was 18 years old, he would come and marry me. That madman who didn't know where he came from, claimed to be the mountain god of the place where my family's old house was, and I was destined to marry him. When my family saw him talking such nonsense, they called for someone to chase him, but he stomped his feet and disappeared directly into the ground, which is also a strange person. When I was a teenager, my family was still very worried that this madman from nowhere would come back and plunder me before sending me to study in Beiping. Now I'm twenty-one, and the madman hasn't come to me yet, so I guess this story was just made up by my family to scare me.

In fact, if you think about it occasionally, it would be nice if this thing was true. In my life, if I really can't marry you, sir, it's not bad to marry a crazy mountain god, maybe I can live forever. When you are gray-haired and hunched over, sir, I will still be the same as I am now, and it will be very interesting to see you again. What do you think, sir?

Well, the ship has docked, so I won't write it down. The next time I write to him, I will probably be at home, and by that time I will tell him about the garden in my old house, which I remember was his favorite thing. Actually, I still have a lot of things I want to tell you, sir, but I don't know if you will be annoyed, sir, I have already written so much this time, and I will leave the rest for next time.

I hope you are doing well!

Yun Shan

On the night of December 14th