188 A distorted childhood does not lead to a normal life
The old man shackled wildly, and he pointed coldly at Qianfu, and his disdainful gaze swept across the audience, as if scraping off a layer of skin from the crowd. Pen? Interesting? Pavilion wWw. biquge。 info He was so angry that his teeth chattered, and he cried out with regret: "Doom, doom! ”
The old man burst into tears, the giant flail trembled, raised his head to the sky, and his angry white beard trembled angrily: "I expose this unscrupulous sky, turn human ethics upside down, and make the society miserable, and the flesh and blood are separated!" At the most heart-wrenching moment, the young generals reacted, and when they raised their leather whips to smoke them, the old man turned his head and glared at the young lieutenant, so frightened that the child staggered and fell back, thinking that the old man was going to eat people.
In the next second, the old man who had to be angry actually faced the 6-year-old Wei Xu, puffed down and knelt down, his knees burst out of blood, and he roared categorically: "I repent!" I plead guilty! Comrade Wei Xu gave me a slap in the face, and made me realize that my thinking is pedantic, and under your teaching, the consciousness of 6-year-old children is higher than mine, and it is his words that have influenced me! ”
The old man looked around, shouted loudly, and spit flew wildly: "It's my own son's head drink, let me know that my thinking has been incurably poisoned by revisionism, my behavior has gone against the grain of man and God, my words and deeds have become a cancer that endangers the country's peril, I am extremely evil, people and gods are indignant, heinous, and I have failed to live up to the party's cultivation and the expectations of the people!" ”
Wei Xu was frightened stupidly by his father's fierce confession, urinated on his pants, staggered back, tears rolled down his face, and looked at his angry father like a ghost, and cried weakly.
But his father looked at Wei Xu sharply and reprimanded him categorically: "Comrade Wei Xu! You reported harshly, you exposed it in a timely manner, you saved me, you are the real successor of the republic! Dad is hard to see you all year round, Dad is incompetent, Dad doesn't blame you, Dad only hopes that I can repay your kindness, return your future, and build our great republican new country! ”
Everyone watched in horror at the reversal of black and white, a name that once shocked the world, an invincible warrior, a noble legend, showing a decisive determination at the end of the road, kneeling to the children on the hastily built wooden platform, and generously repenting. His unkempt white hair trembled and danced wildly with his generous speech, and everyone was silently suppressed by this shocking confession, and they were stunned to see that this man was going to slap his mouth seriously, and his face was swollen like a pig, and his blood was dripping.
Even a baptized young general has never seen such a fierce confession scene, so he vaguely remembered that when the old man in front of him was attacking the village under the charge, he was respectfully called "Desperate Saburo!" by the enemy! ”
Wei Xu kept going backwards, staggering into the arms of his eldest sister, and he couldn't escape his father's terrible gaze. Wei Xu saw his father shouting, "Wei Xu is right! I'm guilty of a terrible crime! I'm guilty! I'm damned! Seeing him slap himself and shake his head, he looked at himself sadly, resolutely stared at himself, and the most terrible thing was that his father was even looking at himself expectantly, looking at himself longingly!
This is a nightmare for Wei Xu.
He knew what he was doing. He was testifying against the strange man, even though he had once called him "father" in a strange way. But the most terrifying thing is not the roaring cheers of the crowd, not the aggressive voice, but the man who was scolded by himself so bloody, actually knelt in front of him, praised himself, beautified himself, and looked at himself expectantly, as if he had a bright future, which was his greatest wish before death.
The ignorant Wei Xu, under the coercion of temptation, opened fire angrily at the strange father, throwing the viciousness of splitting his head and covering his face, but he was reciprocated with overwhelming fatherly love.
This is the nightmare of Hunting Wei Xu's life, and the expectant gaze cast by his father when he is humiliated and clapped his mouth will hunt Captain Xu into the depths of the dream until he breathes.
Because this is like a mountain father's love, it is an unbearable weight of life; His father's meaningful sentence of "give you a future" frequently woke him up from his dreams until Wei Xu grew up.
In the end, Wei Xu was taken away by the excited big sister. He couldn't hear the happy chatter of his big sister beside him at all, and he was in a trance for two or three days. Since then, Wei Xu has not seen his father again until the memorial service. He heard from others that the young general saw his father take the initiative to fan the blood foaming from his palm, and when he went up to stop it, he found that the old man's artery at the base of the tongue had ruptured, and the young general panicked and would not stop the bleeding.
A stubborn stinky stone was scolded by Wei Xu in a few words and knelt down, confessed his guilt, self-harmed, and repented, which was simply outstanding, and Wei Xu became a leader in wearing guilt and making meritorious contributions, and the days that followed were not hard. But he planted a nail in his heart.
But he has remembered that he betrayed a man, a man who loves himself unconditionally and loves his country unconditionally.
As he grew up, Wei Xu gradually understood the cause of his father's death and the cause and effect before and after, so he blamed himself day by day. Apparently unable to accept the fact of accusing his father, he eventually developed another tough and ruthless personality to protect himself, and he convinced himself that there was only one thing he remembered:
It's not terrible to be betrayed by the weak. What is terrible is to be betrayed by the strong. If he does not want to repeat his father's old ways, he must break through the rule until no one can control him.
Otherwise, no matter how you follow the rules, you will die a slow death, like a miner who was hospitalized at the age of 64 but looking forward to retirement at the age of 65, like a desperate old man who has paid a lifetime of pension insurance but finds that the thousands of dollars have been inflated to worthless, like a father who has been loyal all his life but died with a distant family.
Meanness is the pass of the mean. Loyalty is the epitaph of the loyalist. Good people are no longer a compliment.
It's all the world's fault.
When Wei Xu wanted to understand all this, he finally forgave himself, forgave himself for pointing at his dazed and shocked father when he was 6 years old, and forgave himself for his selfish desires. When he was alone, he would always silently miss his father's expectant and longing gaze.
Father's sacrifice is priceless, his death, gave Wei Xu a not too bad starting line, so that he was not stepped into the mud by the big brothers and sisters at that time, and enjoyed the benefits and aftermath of his father's rehabilitation, and now, he finally has the opportunity to compete with the whole world, he bargained with the most terrible devil in the West, and pulled out his teeth under the most rigorous system in the East.
He did not hesitate to walk on the tightrope of life, stepped into the gray area of history, and began the reverse journey of picking millet from the fire, because in his opinion, if he does not break free from the cage of the system and take charge of his own destiny, what is the difference between that and salted fish?
If my father had realized this earlier, he would have been like me......
When Wei Xu meditated alone, every time he thought of this, he would slowly count the sleek Buddha beads in his hand and mutter.
And now, he is approaching the finish line of success, like a thin rocket, using up his life's fuel, pushing himself onto the long-awaited orbit, and if he does not succeed, he will fall.
Unbridled freedom and power, and the ultimate bargaining chip of immortality, both are immediately at your fingertips, and you Li Ming actually declared that this soil is not suitable for my Wei Xu's survival?
The camera turned back to the silent main control room, and Wei Xu's warm face stared at Li Ming without waves, looking at him coldly, like looking down on a toad sitting in the sky.
Li Ming thought that he had won, so he used the most civilized wording to humiliate Wei Xu unscrupulously. After he said this, he gasped excitedly, staring at Wei Xu to see his reaction.
Wei Xu's lips moved, his eyes drooped, like an exhausted prime minister, tired and spit out words: "You, you are right." This soil is not suitable for me to survive. ”
Li Ming stared at Wei Xu with locked eyebrows, seeing that he was tired from the vicissitudes of life, and his heart was finally relieved, and he was relieved by the laxity of his K.O opponent. Li Ming stared at Wei Xu, who bowed his head, nodded, stopped his mouth in moderation, and turned to leave.
Wei Xu closed his eyes and lowered his head, his plump five fingers pinched the Buddha beads on his left wrist one by one, counted them quietly, and muttered to himself: "This soil is not suitable for me to live, because the falcon only belongs to the free sky." ”