After Qing'er picked up all the underground debris, I called her softly, and Qing'er raised her eyes to look at me.

I said, "Mu Jingchi." ”

Qing'er said: "My husband is still in the hospital. ”

I was silent and didn't speak, and after a while, I said to Qing'er, "I'm a little thirsty, can you give me some water." ”

Qing'er gently: "Hey." With a sound, he immediately went out the door.

When she left, I rolled over and sat up from the bed, and then I looked around the room, and the sunlight was shining through the window, and it was so beautiful that it felt like a big dream.

Soon Qing'er came up with the water, and then handed it to me, I took it and took a sip, the water was a little sweet.

After I finished drinking, Qing'er asked again, "Do you want more?" ”

I shook my head and said, "No, I'm not thirsty." ”

Qing'er nodded, she didn't seem to dare to mention that thing, I didn't lead to that direction, after drinking the water, I went back to the bed and lay down, so I lay in Mu's house for about three or four days, on the fourth day I found that the sun outside was good, so I took the initiative to get up from the bed, and slowly walked towards the door, Qing'er They were not there, and I didn't know what to do, I dragged my feet downstairs.

Some servants were gathering downstairs to read something, and when they saw me coming down from the upper floor, they dispersed like birds and beasts, and pretended to be busy sitting on their own business.

I didn't pay attention to it, I had long thought that this kind of thing was the norm, and after sitting on the sofa for a while, I realized that the huge Mu Mansion was empty, only the servants were swaying around in the house.

At this time, Qing'er walked in from outside the hall door, and when she saw that I was not lying on the bed anymore, but sitting on the sofa in the living room, she ran over and asked, "Miss?" Why are you here? ”

I leaned back on the sofa, smiled weakly at her and said, "I've been lying down for a long time, and my head is a little dizzy." ”

Qing'er saw that I was wearing a thin plaid pajama pants on my legs, and when she brought me a blanket on the sofa next to me, covered my legs, and said, "The doctor said that you can't move around for the time being, and you can't freeze, otherwise your joints will hurt in the future." ”

I was silent for a while and asked Qing'er, "Where is Mother Zhou?" ”

Qing'er said: "Mother Zhou and Mrs. Zhou went to the hospital to visit my husband......

When I heard this, I sighed, and Qing'er thought that I would not ask any more, so she turned around and poured water for me on the coffee table, but I asked again; "How is he now?"

Qing'er paused, then looked at me with tea.

Seeing that she didn't speak, I asked again, "What's wrong?" ”

Qing'er held the teacup in her hand, hesitated for a while, and said, "It's stable now, but Mr. is weak, you know, he is not out of danger yet, and he has to be hospitalized for observation." ”

She handed me the tea and said, "Have some tea." ”

I took it slowly, the temperature of the tea was not particularly high, nor was it particularly cold, the temperature was just right, I took a sip in my mouth, inexplicably I remembered some of the words that Mu Jingchi said when he taught me to taste tea, he said that the tea should be divided into three sips, the first sip, the first taste of the tea is sweet, at that time I shook my head and listened, but I didn't taste one or two.

Now that I have tasted it carefully, I find that it is still bitter, and I can't taste the sweetness.

I put the tea in my hand on the table, and when Qing'er saw that I didn't drink it, she asked again, "Miss?" But the taste is not to your liking? ”

I said, "No, it's just that I'm not thirsty all of a sudden." ”

After that, I sat for a while, didn't stay in the living room for long, and went upstairs.

In the evening, Wang Zhizhi came back with Zhou's mother, I heard the movement outside, Qing'er asked beside me: "Miss, Zhou's mother is back, do you want to go downstairs to have a look." ”

I didn't speak, and it seems that everyone has been cold to me a lot in the past few days, including Zhou's mother.

Qing'er knew that I wanted to see Zhou's mother, she walked out after a while, and not long after, Zhou's mother came in, she stood at the door, and I immediately stood up from the side of the bed and called: "Zhou's mother." ”

She looked at me for a long time, but then she walked in, stood in front of me and asked, "How are you doing these days?" ”

I said, "It's a lot better." ”

Zhou's mother said: "I accompanied my wife to the hospital just now, and since you are fine, I am relieved." ”

After she finished speaking, she was about to leave, so I immediately walked over and grabbed her from behind and said, "Mother Zhou, you stay with me." ”

She heard my words, but she didn't move, Qing'er saw it, she was very discerning, she didn't stay in it for a long time, and quietly retreated, only me and Zhou's mother were left inside, and the two of us were in a stalemate for a while, and I asked again: "You...... Are you still mad at me? ”

Zhou's mother didn't speak, but just turned her head to the side.

I said, "I know you're still mad at me. ”

Mother Zhou simply turned her face to look at me and said, "What qualifications do I have to be angry with you, what you want to do is your own business, and we naturally can't say much." ”

I didn't speak anymore, but the hand that was holding Zhou's mother's sleeve slowly slipped down, Zhou's mother seemed to notice something, she turned her face to look at me, and finally she sighed and said: "I blame you, I blame you for not cherishing your body, how long is your body good?" Now you have a problem, you see, now you don't think, wait a while, when it rains and winter, you will know what is called joint pain, now you are older, I can't control you, but I really didn't expect that I brought a big child with one hand, would do such a thing, yes, how wrong is sir, but he raised you, educated you, and gave you all the best, but what about you? Give him a knife in the end? Miss, I really don't understand why you are still obsessed with those things for so many years, and now that everything has passed, isn't it good for you to live your life well? Why play with your life? Isn't it your life that is the most important thing compared to people and things? ”

I didn't speak, but because I stood for too long, my frostbitten leg actually began to ache again, I stood with my hand on the door frame, although I didn't show it on my face, but Zhou's mother still found out, she was still preaching, seeing me like this, she hurriedly asked: "But it hurts again?" ”

I pursed my pale lips and nodded, a thin layer of sweat on my forehead.

She helped me and said anxiously, "How is this good, you are only so old that your body is frostbitten like this, and joint pain is not a joke." ”

She quickly helped me to the edge of the bed and sat down, I don't know why, I wanted to laugh, Zhou's mother was still as reluctant to blame me as before, and soon she forgot that she was still angry.

So I really laughed, and Zhou's mother put a blanket on my lap and said, "You are still laughing, it's all like this." ”

I looked at Zhou's mother's wrinkled face, but it was unusually warm and said, "I, I'm laughing at this world, and Zhou's mother is the best for me, if Zhou's mother is my mother, it would be great." ”

When she heard me say this, she looked up at me and said, "What nonsense are you talking about?" How can I be your mother? I'm just a subordinate. ”

I looked at her with a faint smile, "But you have done everything that my mother should do, except that you did not give birth to me, what difference is there?" ”

Zhou's mother pinched my leg for me and said, "Don't think like this, if your biological mother hears it, she will definitely be sad, no one will let their children recognize others as mothers." ”

I didn't speak, my eyes just followed Zhou's mother's rough hands, squeezing back and forth on my legs.

I said, "Mother Zhou, you said that if my aunt was still here, would she also nag me like this to you?" ”

Mother Zhou stopped her hand and raised her eyes to look at me.

I said: "She will definitely teach me a lot of things, such as what to do, what not to do, how to protect herself, and how to find a good husband, after getting married, she will definitely nag me to have a child, after giving birth, if I quarrel with my husband's family and am wronged, she will hold me in her arms and comfort me, mother's little baby, you still have a mother." ”

Mother Zhou suddenly sat up and hugged me in her arms, my face against her warm neck.

Zhou's mother's rough hand stroked my head and said, "But do you miss your mother?" ”

I said: "At that time, I was too young, in a grade that I couldn't remember anything clearly, they left, I remember the last time we met, it was on the morning of my sister's wedding, my mother changed my new clothes, and gave me a lot of sugar, and asked the maid to take me to my sister's house to play, saying that she would come with my father later, and that day I waited at my sister's house from dark to night, and my mother and father never came to pick me up." ”

Zhou's mother listened quietly and didn't interject, I buried my face in Zhou's mother's arms and warmed her unique mother's smell and said: "Zhou's mother, I don't know why, today I miss my mother and my father very much, but ...... I found that I couldn't remember their faces clearly, it was very blurry and blurry, just a shadow, and it was spinning and turning in my dreams every night. ”

Zhou's mother said: "Maybe your aunt misses you too." ”

I laughed and said, "But he never spoke to me in my dreams, and neither did my sister, and I think they were about ...... You don't want me. ”

Zhou's mother hugged my head and said, "Don't say that, no mother will not want her children, you have to forgive them." ”

My nose was sour, but I didn't speak, just leaned on Zhou's mother's arms, looking out the window at the shadows of the trees cast on the ground, dangling.

I grabbed Zhou's mother's hand and said, "Zhou's mother, don't let go of me, let me hold you and sleep for a while." ”

Zhou's mother held back her tears and said, "Okay, Zhou's mother holds you and won't let go." ”

Gradually, I fell asleep, and I really fell asleep in a blur, this time in a dream, and I dreamed of my childhood, when I was six years old, the day my sister got married.

Auntie dressed me and picked me up from the bed, she looked at her round face with great love, and suddenly kissed me the face and said, "My little buns are so fragrant." ”

At that time, I just felt itchy and laughed.

After that, she gave me some candy, tied two pigtails for me, and then handed me over to the maid, and asked the maid to take me out to play, and by the way, I went to Mu's house first, and A-Niang went to the room to serve my father and dress.

After the maid kept me from the room, there was a sound of firecrackers outside, I was very small, I was held on the shoulder by the maid, looking at the suona blowing, wearing red clothes to welcome the family, and entered my door.

The maid smiled and led me through the crowd, I saw A-Niang holding her sister standing at the gate, full of smiles, she personally sent my sister into the red sedan chair, and then I saw her look at me, suddenly waved at me, and smiled.

When I opened my eyes, I found that my face was full of tears, and everything around me was still familiar, and I had grown up and was no longer the little self.

Reality is always so cruel that it pulls you into a dream, deceives you for a while, and then pushes you out of the dream again, opening your eyes to find the cruelty in your eyes.

I was a little dazed, and Qing'er called me a few times by my bedside before I turned my head to look at her.

I asked her, "What time is it?" ”

Qing'er said: "It's already ten o'clock, you just kept crying in your dream, and you couldn't wake up." ”

I sighed and said, "It's okay, it's just a nightmare." ”

Qing'er helped me up from the bed, my joints still ached, Qing'er massaged me, pressed for a while, I asked Qing'er, "Is there still porridge in the kitchen?" ”

Qing'er said, "Yes." ”

I said, "I want to have a drink." ”

Qing'er got up and said, "I'll get it for you." ”

Then she stepped back and went downstairs to fetch porridge for me.

I stretched out my hand and continued to rub it for myself, and when I was kneading the joints, there was a knock on the door, and I looked up and saw that it was a maid with a raw face, and she came up to me, handed me something, and said, "Miss, your letter." ”

I took it in my hand and looked at it, and opened the envelope in front of the maid, and there were only four words in it, Wenshan Restaurant.

I stuffed the letter back into the envelope, and then looked up at the maid in front of me, she looked at me very calmly, and I handed it back to her and said, "I know, you go." ”

The maid did not linger any longer, and said to me, "Yes." After that, he took the letter and slowly retreated.

It didn't take long for Qing'er to come up, and it was as if it had never happened, and I was still drinking porridge as if nothing had happened.

The next morning, although I got up early in the morning, I didn't go out, but waited for Wang Zhizhi's car to leave downstairs, I came out of the room, Zhou's mother was at home, she saw me come out, so she came out of the kitchen and asked me if I wanted something to eat.

I said to Zhou's mother, "Zhou's mother, I want to go out later." ”

As soon as this sentence came out, Zhou's mother immediately looked at the bodyguards standing at the door, and I realized that Mu Jing was not at home for a long time, but there were a lot of bodyguards here, probably to watch me.

Mother Zhou walked up to me and said with a smile: "It's such a cold day, don't go out, stay at home." ”

I saw through it and said, "Well, it's really cold." ”

Zhou's mother went to the kitchen to prepare food for me, and then after eating, Zhou's mother was busy in the kitchen again, and after I walked in, Zhou's mother was boiling soup, and I stood aside and asked, "Is it for me?" ”

Mother Zhou glanced at me and said, "I'll say it's you who boiled it." ”

In an instant, I understood what Zhou's mother meant, I didn't speak, just looked at the pot of soup rolling, and after a long time, I said, "I'll go to the restaurant and wait for you first." ”

Zhou's mother: "Hey. With that, he continued to boil the soup in the pot.

After I finished breakfast, Zhou's mother left with the soup, after she left, I sat in the living room for a while, and then went upstairs, I stood at the window in the room, and looked downstairs carefully, only to find that there were nearly twice as many guards here as usual, obviously Mu Jingchi had seen through all my routines to escape.

I suddenly sat there in despair, asking myself in my heart, can't I go, will I have to be trapped here by him for the rest of my life, and what will happen in the future.

Actually, I don't know, I'm confused.

Just as I was looking out the window in a daze, the maid who had sent me the letter before came in again, and she had a set of maid's clothes in her hand, and I looked at her, and she stood at the door and said, "Miss, the lord wants to see you." She walked up to me, put her clothes in front of me and said, "You change first." ”

I looked at the maid for a long time and said, "Don't take any chances, you can't get out, there are twice as many guards here as usual, and they are all sent to the same route where I often escape, so it is obviously not so likely that you will get out." ”

But the maid didn't speak, but looked at me for a long time and asked, "Do you not want to go, or really can't go?" ”

I looked back at her.

I sneered, got up from the couch, and pulled the dress from her hand, and I went to the bathroom to change out, but after I came out. The maid was sitting in front of my dresser and adjusting something, and I looked at her and asked, "What are you doing?" ”

She heard my voice, stood up inside, and said, "I'm getting you to sit down at this door." ”

At this time, I saw clearly that what the maid was holding in her hand were materials for makeup.

She said, "Time is running out, come here." ”

I hesitated for a few seconds, then walked over, the maid immediately bent down, with a paintbrush dipped in the powder juice on my face outline, I sat there silently, watching her stroke by stroke, originally not taken seriously, but not long, when I opened my eyes again to look, only to find that the face in the mirror was so strange that people could not find the slightest trace of familiarity.

I looked at her, she had already put down the paintbrush in her hand and said, "You can just go out boldly and leave through the main entrance." ”

I said, "Who are you?" ”

She packed up her utensils and said, "Your grandfather's people." ”

I said, "Can you teach me?" ”

She stopped and looked at me, then said, "I don't think you need it." ”

Then after she had processed all the traces on the table, she said to me like an ordinary maid, "A-Xing, let's go, there are still things to buy today." ”

I was silent for two or three seconds, then stood up and said, "Yes." ”

I followed her out of the door, and all the servants came and went in the hall, but no one recognized us, until we reached the big iron gate, and the guards looked at us, and the maid beside me said to the guards, "Go out and buy things." ”

The guard glanced at the two of us and quickly opened the iron door, but just as we were about to walk past, he suddenly grabbed me and asked, "Why is this man a little faceless?" ”

I immediately paused, and then the maid next to me smiled and said, "This is a newcomer, not long after I came, Steward Zhou asked her to learn from me." ”

The guard looked at me, then at the house, and asked, "Where's Miss?" ”

The maid said, "I'm resting." ”

The guard looked at me a few more times, and finally let us go, and without further questioning, we walked out unhindered.

After we left the house, the maid sent me to the gate of the city and said to me, "I won't send you, you can go into the city and go to the Dexin Tea House by yourself." ”

I looked at her, didn't say anything, and then the maid left.

I watched her departing back for a long time, and then turned and walked towards the city.

When I arrived at the door of Dexin Tea House, I wandered for a few minutes, and then walked straight upstairs, there was no one upstairs, no customers, and no shopkeepers, just as I was standing in the hall and pondering, a sentence suddenly came from behind me: "You are here." ”

I was startled, and when I looked back, I saw that the grandfather was standing behind me, and for some reason, I felt that his eyes were a little cold when he looked at me, but I had expected this to be the case, and I was not surprised at all.

I walked towards him, and when I reached him, I called my grandfather.

He didn't answer, just walked towards the tea table not far away with a cane, and after he sat down, he looked at me and asked, "Do you know what happened to Huo Changfan now?" ”

I didn't speak, I just shook my head, and I really didn't know.

My grandfather looked at me and sneered and said: "Two military divisions died, Huo Changfan's army was already hit hard last time, and now this battle is just worse, more than 5,000 people, dead and wounded, and what about you?" Why didn't you kill him. ”

I said, "No chance." ”

When my grandfather heard my words, he suddenly sneered, slapped the table, and asked angrily: "Is there no chance, if you can't do it?!" ”

The teapot lid on the table was all beating, and the crisp sound of collision stimulated the eardrums.

I still didn't move, just frowned and continued to bow my head and said, "I have successfully inserted the knife into his chest, but I didn't expect ......"

"You didn't expect that the knife could stab him in the heart with one centimeter left, and kill him, right? Did you not expect it, or did you not know that one centimeter? ”

My grandfather asked me rhetorically.

I said, "I really didn't expect that." ”

Grandpa stood up and said, "Okay, you didn't expect it, you really didn't expect it." He suddenly walked to a table not far away, there was a black cloth on the table, there seemed to be something underneath, and when his grandfather opened it with his backhand, the black cloth was lifted on the ground, it was a tablet, the spiritual seat of the Lu family's life for more than 20 days, densely placed there, placed on a small table, crowded.

Headed by my parents' and my sister's.

Grandpa pointed to those spiritual positions and said, "You say those words in front of these spiritual positions once, if you can do it without changing your face, then I will believe everything you just said." ”

I didn't move, and my grandfather knocked the cane in his hand to the ground and said, "You tell me!" ”

My body shook twice, and at this time, a person rushed in downstairs, and he immediately stood between me and my grandfather, he said: "Grandpa, Qingye is not a professional killer, it is normal for there to be errors, why do you force her?" ”

The person who said these words was Song Yu, but his words not only did not make my grandfather angry, but also made my grandfather sneer again and again: "Error? Since she was eleven years old, I have found someone to teach her, what kind of way can go down with a knife, so that Mu Jingchi can be fatal with a knife, she started to learn at the age of eleven, and she still can't learn it now? ”

Grandpa looked at Song Ol and asked, "Do you think she hasn't learned it, or has she learned it, but she doesn't want to do it?" ”

Song Alcohol pursed his lips, a little afraid to look at him with the same sharp eyes as his grandfather Ying, and his grandfather sneered and said: "Song Alcohol, even you know the reason for this, presumably I don't need to say anything about the rest." ”

He raised the crutches in his hand, pointed to the tablets on the table and said: "She can lie to me, she can lie to anything, but she can't lie to these tablets, she has forgotten who killed everyone in her Lu family, who made her family ruined, and now she is like a dog completely domesticated by Mu Jingchi, her every hesitation, her every lie, and every betrayal is just a knife of humiliation poking at these tablets." ”

Song Yu lowered his head, and his grandfather looked at me again: "I'm very disappointed in you, maybe your parents are even more disappointed in you, you always promise me on the surface, but as soon as you turn around, you forget what you want to do, Lu Qingye, because of this centimeter, it is very likely that we will all die with it, you wait, you will understand the fate of our people in the future." ”

Grandpa didn't speak again, and didn't look at me anymore, he poked his cane and turned around and left downstairs, and then I was left standing there with Song Alcohol, he looked at me and wanted to touch me, but as soon as his hand was raised and retracted slightly, after a long time, he called: "Qingye." ”

I stumbled and knelt on the ground, and Song Alcohol wanted to help me, but he held it in the air again and retreated.

He stood there quietly, accompanying me, just like every time I was punished by my grandfather, he always accompanied me like this, no matter how many things I did wrong, he would bear it with me, but this time, he couldn't bear it for me.

He watched me silently for a moment, and finally he fell to his knees with me.

Those tablets were erected there in black, like a mountain pressing me out of breath, I lay there weakly, and asked Song Alcohol next to me: "Am I wrong?" ”

Song Ol said: "There is no right or wrong in this world, my grandfather asked you to be like a real killer, and without blinking your eyes, you gave the knot to the person you want to finish, but he seems to have forgotten that you are just an amateur killer, if it were me, I wouldn't be able to do it, it's not that you're wrong, it's that we were all wrong at the beginning, but we can't blame you." ”

I lay on the ground and didn't move, just trembling my body, at this moment I was very tired, as if someone had drained all the strength and blood in my body, just like that to face all this, my fingers clasped the gap in the floor and said: "Everyone said I was wrong, grandpa said I was wrong, Zhou's mother said I was wrong, everyone thought I was wrong, but I can't tell what is right, how to do it to satisfy everyone, Song alcohol, you said that if it was me who died back then, my sister was alive, how would my sister choose?" ”

Song Ol didn't speak, his eyes fell directly on his sister's tablet, and when I thought he couldn't speak, he said, "Perhaps, she is not as good as you." ”

I lay on the ground and looked up at him.

He said: "At that time, after everyone in the Lu family died, the reason why your sister jumped from the attic was that she couldn't face it or hurt her, she wasn't as brave as you, so she used this method to escape, she put all the responsibility on her body to you, a seven-year-old child, she was just a coward in the end." ”

There was a little resentment in Song Ol's eyes, and he said: "At least you are alive, you have come to face all this, but she has no courage to face it." ”

I said, "Actually, I don't either, but I'm afraid of death, but she's not afraid of death." ”

I curled up on the ground, pressed my face to the cold floor, I don't know how long it took, I lay on the ground and cried quietly, Song Yu looked at my body that was constantly shaking in the ground, he raised his hand, and finally put his hand on my head, he whispered: "I'll buy you candy to eat, don't cry." ”

When I heard his words, I cried, but I didn't move, and for a long time, I continued to lie there.

He seems to have forgotten that I have grown up and am no longer the kid who pestered him and bought me candy to eat.

I don't know how long I've been lying underground, but at this time, footsteps came from me, and I heard Song Yu call out with a little surprise: "Huihui." ”

I lifted my face from the ground, and when I looked up, there was a man standing in front of us, a woman, a woman with a big belly, who was looking at me with a smile.

Her belly was very big, several times bigger than a ball, and she recognized me and said, "You are Song Ol's cousin, we have met before, on the street." ”

I was stunned for a few seconds and said, "Really? ”

She smiled and nodded, she looked at Song Alcohol with a food box in her hand, and Song Alcohol also looked at her, frowned and asked, "Why are you here?" ”

The woman named Huihui said, "I know you must have been trained by your grandfather again, so come and have a look." ”

Then she put the food box on the ground, and the person squatted down with difficulty and said, "I brought you some food, so let's eat some." ”

Then she opened the lid and took out some pastries from it, Song Yu looked at the pastries and asked, "You made it?" ”

She smiled and said, "yes." ”

Song Alcohol took her hand, and there were burns on both hands, and she just wanted to hide, but Song Alcohol grabbed it and said, "Didn't you ask you not to do this?" Why just don't you listen, you're pregnant now, can't you just stay good? ”

Then Song Alcohol stood up, helped her up, helped her to the side of the chair and sat down, she was really difficult to move, after sitting down, she smiled and said: "I'm fine, you don't have to worry, idle is idle." ”

At this time, when she saw that I was still kneeling there, she said, "Qingye, get up quickly, my grandfather is not here." ”

Song Ol seemed to think of me at this time, and immediately walked over and said, "Get up, your face is not very good, and the ground is very cold." He bent over and helped me up.

I was a little at a loss, and after being helped to the table by Song Alcohol, Song Alcohol's wife poured tea for me, and she handed me the first cup and said, "It's hot, warm up quickly." ”

I glanced at her, and I didn't know how to move, and it took me a long time to reach out and take it stiffly.

She continued to smile softly and said, "I've never heard Song Alcohol mention you, but I've heard my grandfather mention it a few times. ”

I glanced at Song Alcohol, and he whispered slightly, "I have a cousin you don't know." ”

Luo Hui smiled and said, "I know, but I didn't expect you to have such a good relationship and be punished for kneeling together." ”

Speaking of this, Song Yu said with a smile: "We used to be like this often, she was the youngest sister in our family, so when I was a child, she was very noisy, every time I went out with her sister, she was like a little tail, and she couldn't shake it off." ”

Luo Hui asked, "She also has a sister?" ”

As soon as this sentence came out, Song Yu reacted, and his voice weakened a little and said, "I am no longer alive." ”

Luo Hui is very good at checking people's emotions, so she didn't ask any more, but smiled at me kindly and said, "Eat, it's still hot." ”

I held the teacup and smiled, but after the first sip of tea, I put the cup on the table, got up and said, "I...... I still have something to do, so I'll go first. ”

Luo Hui asked, "Will you not take a break?" ”

I said, "No, I don't have much time." ”

Luo Hui said to Song Yu: "Go and send it away." ”

Song Ol asked, "Then is it okay for you to be here alone?" ”

Luo Hui shook her head and said, "No problem." ”

Song Ol nodded, looked at me and said, "Let's go, I'll send you." ”

I didn't refuse, and the two of us turned around and walked out of the tea house together, but miraculously neither of them spoke, and when I walked downstairs, I stopped and said to Song Yu: "You go up, she is pregnant, and it is not good to be alone in there." ”

He looked at me for a long time and said, "I'm sorry." ”

I didn't know why he apologized to me, but I couldn't stand the excuse and I smiled and said, "It's okay." ”

Then, I walked towards the sea of people, Song Alcohol stood behind me and looked at me, and finally I stopped again, looked back at him and laughed and said, "You know what? Once you drank wine and kissed me once, it was when I was thirteen years old, I went to look for you that day, and you regarded me as my sister, that was my first kiss, alas, I didn't tell you this secret, Song alcohol. ”

He didn't speak.

I smiled again and said, "Actually, I know that you were also awake at that time, you just missed your sister too much, you were not drunk and confused, but you were confused and thought of me as her, and I didn't tell you about it." ”

After I said this, I didn't go on, I looked at him one last time, then I smiled and turned and merged into the sea of people, I kept walking forward, kept moving forward, I didn't look back, perhaps, it was time to put down.

My affection for him, beginning with that kiss, ended at the age when I first fell in love, and now, at the age of understanding.

He never gave me an explanation for that matter, and I never asked him to explain it, and now, things have come to this point, and there is probably no one who is right or wrong, it is just a matter of making people.

We're always missing each other, and that's probably it.

I was running on the road, I fell to the ground, I watched the numb faces of the people around me, back and forth around me, I laughed, and struggled to get up from the ground again, and continued to walk forward.

Life is like this, because fate meets, love and hate.

When I returned to Mu's house, the hall was so quiet that it was not good, I raised my face to look, only to find that Zhou's mother was standing there waiting for me, and the clothes on my body were still the same as the maid's clothes, although my face was painted with makeup, Zhou's mother still recognized me.

She didn't laugh, but looked at me and said, "People can be forgiven for doing wrong things, but they can be corrected if they know their mistakes, but you have done this again and again, miss, what do you want me to say about you." ”

I knew that when I came back today, I would inevitably be told by Zhou's mother, so I didn't refute her, but just dragged my body a little tired and said, "I want to rest." ”

I happened to walk upstairs, and Zhou's mother said, "I said that you boiled the soup, and Mr. drank it, but he didn't speak, and you can come with me again tomorrow." As long as you know that you are wrong, you will not be careful. ”

I said, "Mama Zhou, I'm not wrong. I turned my head and looked at her and said, "And I can't make soup, and if you tell him that I made it, he won't believe it at all." ”

Seeing me like this, Zhou's mother sighed and said, "Why are you still angry? ”

Inexplicably, I had enough of hearing such words, and asked with a little anger: "What is gambling anger?" Is it gambling to break a family? When I was seven years old, I watched my sister jump from the attic, and I became an orphan. Mother Zhou, I don't know if I'm wrong or you're wrong, it seems that you are always ignoring and forgetting this, as if he is good to me, I should forget this, I should accept it, I should not hate, he is good to me, can he withstand the life of my family? ”

I smiled and said: "If I do it all over again, I will still do it, and I don't think I am wrong, you do this, it is like a child who is abandoned by her own mother, and when she grows up, her biological mother comes to recognize her, and treats her in a thousand ways, she is indifferent, she indifferently refuses all the care of this biological mother, and then everyone is accusing her of being unfilial, accusing her of being cold-blooded, accusing her of doing something wrong, but selectively ignoring it, at first she abandoned her, this is what you think of me now, right?" ”

Zhou's mother said: "How can you use this kind of statement? Sir wouldn't be your mother, and he didn't abandon you. ”

I smiled and said, "Didn't abandon me? He killed my whole family, leaving me with nothing in an instant, and became an orphan, what is this not abandonment? He is indeed not my mother, but isn't he just like the mother who abandoned me and wanted to make it up to me in every way when I grew up? When I don't accept all the kindness he has done to me, aren't you just the bunch of people who accuse me of being unfilial, of being cold-blooded, of not doing this? What's the difference? ”

Seeing that I was still thinking like this, Zhou's mother was a little excited and said, "Miss, you must not think like this!" The grace of nurturing is more important than everything, Mr. really can't bear to hurt you, even if you do such a thing to him, he still doesn't do anything to you, it can be seen that he doesn't want to compensate you, but really treats you as his family, now everything has passed so long, what's the use of you still obsessing about this, don't forget, now your only reliance in this world is only Mr., if he dies, what good will it do you? ”

I said, "No good, but at least my parents have the knowledge to rest in peace." ”

Mother Zhou saw that I was so stubborn, I didn't want to listen to it anymore, but whispered: "Mother Zhou, I'm tired, I don't want to talk too much, don't prepare dinner tonight." ”

Then I went upstairs.

Just because he is good to me, I should accept it, shouldn't I refuse? I stabbed him, and I didn't expect everyone to think I was wrong, but was I wrong? Could it be that the 20 or so lives of my Lu family deserve to be killed, and they are wrong?

Now I seem to have reached the point where everything is wrong, my grandfather says I'm wrong, they say I'm wrong, everybody is telling me what to do, everybody is asking of me, but I'm standing in the middle of this, like a puppet that has been pulled by someone, and I don't have any freedom.

I can't tell right from wrong anymore, I just want to rest.

I went back to my room and collapsed on the bed, curled up with my headache-crumbling head.

Wang Zhizhi came back in the evening, and as soon as she came back, she immediately walked upstairs to me, I don't know why she came, and I raised my face to look at her with a heavy head.

Seeing that my face was so pale, she was still cold, but finally softened a little and asked, "Mother Zhou cooked, do you want to go down and use electricity?" ”

I said, "I'm not hungry." ”

I just wanted to bury myself in the quilt, but she was silent for a while, and then said, "I didn't mean anything else when I came to you, your brother-in-law has passed the danger period, but he still has to recuperate in the hospital, and he can't come back for the time being." ”

I didn't speak.

She also said: "Mother Zhou wants to go to the hospital with me, and there is no one at home to take care of you." ”

Hearing her words, I slowly raised my face and looked at it, she didn't say what she meant, but her words made people understand very clearly, she asked me to go back to Yuan's house.

I said, "I know, you asked him if he let me go." ”

Wang Zhizhi said: "I will ask, I will ask tomorrow, but you had better be prepared for this, you are married after all, your home is not here, but in the Yuan family, Yuan Lin is your husband." ”

I lay there silently, and when she saw that I didn't speak, she didn't linger long, and quickly turned and left my room.

The next day, Zhou's mother knocked on my door outside, but I didn't answer, she pushed the door and walked in, stood beside my bedside and said, "Miss, come with me to the hospital." ”

I didn't move, I just thought I was asleep.

Zhou's mother said again: "Miss, do you want to go on like this forever?" It's not good for you. ”

I still didn't move, and at this time Qing'er walked in, stood beside my bed with Zhou's mother, and said to me, "Miss, you should go and have a look, just a simple visit." ”

She was the first to do it for me, bringing me clothes in the cupboard.

At this time, Zhou's mother cried, she said, "Why are you so stubborn? Why don't you even go to visit for such a big thing, do you plan to go on like this with your husband forever? If you hit yourself so hard, you're only going to get yourself bruised. ”

I heard Zhou's mother's cry, so I sat up from the bed and asked, "I went to see him, can our relationship be restored to before?" ”

Zhou's mother was stopped by me, but Qing'er said: "But at least it will be better than now, things have happened, and there is no way to remedy it, but at least it must be eased, miss, Zhou's mother is right, you can't spend it like this with Mr. all the time." ”

Zhou's mother cried again and said, "You can go, you are stubborn." ”

They seemed to have a posture that if I didn't go, they wouldn't move, I could only get up from the bed, pick up my clothes and put them on my body, Qing'er and Zhou's mother were relieved.

After I got dressed, Zhou's mother took me to the car to the hospital, and Zhou's mother sat beside me and told me: "Miss, wait a while, don't treat Mr. with this stubborn look, you have to be moderately soft, don't say something unpleasant." ”

I didn't speak, I just felt dizzy, probably feverish.

When Zhou's mother saw that I didn't speak, she thought I was listening carefully, so she continued to talk and chattered all the way.

After the car arrived at the hospital, I was dragged out of the car by Zhou's mother and Qing'er, I don't know which ward Mu Jingchi lived in, and when they pulled me to an extremely quiet ward, Zhou's mother signaled Qing'er to knock on the door.

Qing'er was a little nervous, glanced at me, and then knocked on the door twice with trembling hands, it was still very quiet inside, and it didn't take long for someone to open the door, and the person who came out was Wang Zhizhi, she saw me being pulled by Zhou's mother, and was stunned for a few seconds.

Zhou's mother smiled and said, "Madam, Miss has come to visit Mr. ”

Wang Zhizhi said: "He is resting, and the doctor said that he can't see anyone now. ”

Zhou's mother said, "Why don't you report to Mr. for us first?" ”

Wang Zhizhi looked at Zhou's mother and asked, "Do you still think I can't lie to you?" ”

Zhou's mother explained with a smile: "That's not what we meant. Just as Zhou's mother and Wang Zhizhi were circling outside, Mu Jingchi suddenly said from outside the door: "Who is here?" ”

Wang Zhizhi's face was stunned, and she just wanted to speak, but she didn't expect Zhou's mother to say first: "Sir, it's Miss who has come to see you." ”

Then, there was silence in the room again, and Zhou's mother waited for a while, not knowing what was going on inside, and whispered, "Miss also made soup for you." ”

Even Wang Zhizhi waited for the movement inside, and for almost a few seconds, Mu Jingchi said, "Come in." ”

Mother Zhou breathed a sigh of relief, and didn't look at Wang Zhizhi's face, she pulled me and walked in, and when I arrived in the ward, I saw Mu Jingchi leaning on the hospital bed in a hospital gown, Wang Shuyi and Steward Zhou were there, and there were some documents on the bedside table.

He was flipping his hands, and when he heard the movement, he glanced over to me, but after a glance, he took it back and did not speak.

Mother Zhou quietly stuffed the soup into my hand and motioned for me to come over, but she pushed me so much that I had to take a step forward.

Steward Zhou, who was standing beside Mu Jingchi's bedside, looked at me with extremely cold eyes, as if he would kill me at any time, but I didn't look at him, just put the soup in my hand on the bedside table, and said to Mu Jingchi, "I put the soup here." ”

I turned around and was about to leave, but Zhou's mother immediately stopped me, looked at me and said, "Miss, your soup hasn't come out yet." ”

Mother Zhou's face was extremely anxious, at this time Mu Jingchi had already put down the documents in his hand, he coughed twice and said, "Let her go back." ”